I was deep in lucid sleep.
You fed me food doctor told me not to eat.
I didn't question,
but your motives to myself.
A landfill of poison,
and you mean it all for me.
Each rose another thorn,
each bite another death.
I was deep in lucid sleep.
My innocence I must keep,
is led astray for just on night.
Here I, to live, must fight.

I remember as a child-
peeking over the window,
to a ticking sound,
from a pitch black cloak,
hiding a creature on the ground.
A shadow of a haunting sparrow,
with a knife atop a pole.
I simply stared and giggled,
as I felt the lifeless soul.
Unsure of what to think,
I believe I heard a voice.
Said it, "I weaved a basket."
Then left he, a silent noise.
Baffled!
The atmosphere was like scent so taint.
"The basket soon has become a case."
The words were wispy and growing faint,
like the words were sent away.
I was hesitant to follow it,
and I don't recall why I didn't.
I found myself the sturdy floor,
and my friend,
'the cloaked one' was now no more.

I have a fairy by my side
Which says I must not sleep,
When once in pain I loudly cried
It said "You must not weep"
If, full of mirth, I smile and grin,
It says "You must not laugh"
When once I wished to drink some gin
It said "You must not quaff".

When once a meal I wished to taste
It said "You must not bite"
When to the wars I went in haste
It said "You must not fight".

"What may I do?" at length I cried,
Tired of the painful task.
The fairy quietly replied,
And said "You must not ask".

Moral: "You mustn't."

She's a little bit of a dreamer,
with holes in her mind.
Her parents push her on the bike,
then she believes she's left behind.
Her poems plead forgiveness,
and unveil her sorrows deep.
Though she tries to change her image,
it's one which she knows she must keep.
But keep on peddling Kelsie.
If you feel like they're gone
you mustn't be brought down and sad.
Keep on peddling Kelsie.
Don't let fake sympathy
make you feel bad.
Peddle like the wind,
blowing dust into the air.
If some people choke,
brush it off like you don't care.
Being someone else,
is not what I ask you to do.
Stop asking for permission,
to finally be you.

I broke like a ship to rocks,
but I always thought I was the perfect Goldie Locks.
Alas the red did stain my hands.
Alas I had to say goodbye to all my friends.
Alas all torture me,
still,
though now through veins.
But it doesn't matter now,
no one remains :)

Different people sitting in the same seats.
Seats scattered all over the earth.
Earth covered in questions.
Questions filling up my cup.
Cup pouring over, emptying, and overflowing.
Over-flowing life,
made by the simple mind.
Mind is mine.
I made it all my own.
I watch people walk by,
never knowing where they go.
And that's okay.
That's just fine,
cause if I think for myself,
my mind is all mine.

Joey went a running,
with no where left to run.
Joey went a jumping,
grabbing at the sun.
Joey wasn't happy.
Joey had no choice.
People used to hit him,
and no one heard his voice.
Now Joey has left town,
he's no where to be found.
Joey touched the sky,
and crashed into the ground

Always seeing,
always watching.
A close distance.
Like bounds of stars,
close to the eye,
but actually far.
Curious stares
circle the world.
Not really sure
where utopia is,
but being a flower in the wall,
means growing to the sky.
Holding hope like pollen,
and having meet and greets,
with the visitors.
These are the wallflower ways.

Your were right.
I act so pitiful.
You were right.
I am negative.
You were right.
I'm a think in absolutes.
You were right.
I'm like a Sith.

But what do labels really change?
Do they warm you at night?
Even though it is,
you'd never admit my statement is right.

I'm gonna hold back tears,
every freakin' day for you.
I'm put up this always-an-optimist act,
every freakin' time you say to.
I'm gonna laugh,
and never again cry.
Because you say it makes you tired...

I'm gonna hold in my scream,
and smile, never frown.
I'm gonna say I'm a-okay,
while you cut me down,
such a wee-tree.
I don't deserve sarcastic mimicry.

But you don't even need me..
You don't even see me..
So why do I have to..
waste all my freakin' control on you?

If I so much as complain,
about you,
about life,
you stab me with a freaking knife.

What happened?
You were my role-model,
my brother,
my best friend,
my life.

"I know."
Is all I am able to say to you anymore,
because if I strike so slightly,
the rain will pour.

If I was allowed,
   to sit on a comfy rock;
        forever       watch the clock.
               I'd let time fly,
                                            pass me by,
                      long as I could be
                                 me       the whole time.

You are never gonna get
everything you want in this world.
First things first,
get what you deserve.

I gotz no life.
I gotz no cash.
All I got is these pimpin' hashtags
#money
#grill
#dddddaaaamncheckoutdatfineassgirl

Like a web,
tangling up one string under,
over, and knot.
No way to more simply,
explain train of thought.

Whose got the answers?
Rise oh rise!
Whose got the answers now?

Whose criticizing?
Oh rise, oh rise?
Whose criticizing now?

Who thinks they know,
and who knows they think?

Trumping their thoughts,
onto me?

Who knows what's right,
and who knows what's wrong?

Who has the answers to fix everyone?

Tell me, oh tell me,
I just have to know,
whose got the answers now?

Two little monkeys jumping in a tree,
one fell out and looked at me.
He gave me a sniff,
and glory be,
I ran with monkeys chasing me.

I can sing,
I can dance,
prance around,
without pants.

Can you sing?
Can you dance?
Prance around,
without pants?

I gave away my branches,
I gave away my leaves,
you chopped me up for housing,
then ran off,
leaving me.

I gave away my dirt,
and gave away my air,
I gave away the water,
you said you'd none to spare.

I gave away my patterns,
I gave away my age,
I gave away all I had,
and you'd just take and take.

And now that I have nothing,
I sit alone, and cry
I think how I am now a stump,
and you didn't even say goodbye.

There was a song,
I recall like a drug.
From my childhood,
yet faintly lost at sea.

It was a sweet song.
A whistle?
A sweet song indeed.
It was a humming,
and a hemming.
And I sway to the long,
for that old sweet song.

The song that shut
sweet child eyes.
The song that could
disguise bad times.
The song filled with warmth,
to soften my ice.
The song that calmed pain,
proving the existence of 'truly nice.'

This song from way low,
to the day I now know,
is my..heart
my..sky
my lu-lu-lullaby

The iron drips from my fingers.
The man gives out a yell.
The child launches, she launches at me.
Sadly her launch had failed.
I chuckled at her, with no pity.
Her frightened face, what a laugh.
The person she’s crying for isn't worth dying for.
After all,
he was a bad man.
It’s funny, so funny, funny the fact.
The fact, she thought if she grabbed my neck then,
maybe, just maybe, maybe I’d die.
I laughed again and finally, I gave out a sigh.
“Poor child,” I said my voice left unchanged.
“You misunderstood. I shouldn't be ashamed.
Your idol has done so many bad things,
now he’ll pay for his sins of adultery,
in a place which this blind man cannot see.
She fell to the ground befalling her tears.
This was the end of her happy years.
What? Did she think it was a fairy tale life?
Reality is sharp, just like a knife.
I laughed at the fact I took his life,
with just one swing of my most dull scythe.

I chose this path
No, no one else did just me
No one else did
So why do I want to blame it on them
I told myself I wouldn't cry
I told myself I shouldn't lie
I told myself these but, I do this anyway
I like to break the boundaries
Skipping stones across a forbidden lake
But I wouldn't listen to myself when I said stop
I grasped my memories; nothing else then I stormed out that door
I want you to believe it was your fault
I wanted you to hate yourself for it
To come to me before I left this door or....
at least to regret it all
But, I couldn't even be honest with myself until it was over.
I wanted so bad
To have some way of knowing you weren't just going to forget
forget about me
But I lied to myself we were never a "we"
It took me forever to realize
You didn't even care
much less remember me
So I take my memories, my blames, tears,and lies and will disappear before your very eyes.

I get the crust and the gristle of a thistle once a missile shooting out into the sky and I cry, wonder why. Never sure what I feel for the meal of a deal and then words more like air slip the breeze in my hair, butterflies in the skies killing what kept my alive. Oh too bad, well how sad, if the songs last lines din't matter it'd harm, it'd make the soul so very mad. Here I fall, there I stand like a robot dancing to the tunes. It's demand. Hear I laugh, hear I cry. I hear the screams and feel the burn, so why? Why unsure, of what's telling me my life is so impure. Threatened heart, from the strings that wrap it, tearing it apart. Feel the clench of a bundle of what you yourself have drench and so benched. And you threw to me the horror show, I never so have thought would reckon me to be. I, to be, it's master and it's longing family, here I cry. Hear "I" cry. For I exist in heart, but never, not in mind. There I stand once again as a memory of all that I pretend. If I tried, to be real, the pieces fall apart inside. So I hide, then I quiver and I shake as 'me' is inside. I can touch to the shelter covered in the unbelieving, underachieving to be who I know I am to be. Or at least what you see. I crush the old me and start anew, though I grew. I, immortal to myself have stomped the true. And I become something greater than simple little shrew. Do not lie! For I see with one eye, the look through me. What you see is a host, not the ghost, that lives on. "Awh, look at me. I'm so strong!" Laugh along. Child there. Where? Oops, forgot to care. Now I stare, towards the end that's never ending like this script. Never ending. Twist and bending. Don't kid me, I'm no kid. I'm the body of a youth, but I am dead. I've destroyed myself, if others didn't do a perfect job. Hold up stop! I'm letting go, a bubble that will pop. It will burst, destroying me, if it doesn't **** me first. Here I stand. Hear I cry. There I go. I have died.

"Grow up tall,
little kid,"
said grandpa Joe.
And so I did.

The watermelon grow tall too.
The sunflowers look to the sky,
keeping their chins up,
raised real high.

So maybe it's silly,
watching grass grow,
but if you never try,
how could you ever know?

So maybe it's crazy,
chanting for the rain,
but if it never comes,
how could I grow the grain?

I'd prefer to stare at clouds,
than sleep forever like a rock,
skidding by life.
Why, that would just ****!

So, if you ask me to leave this here place,
you better shove it,
before you wake up
in an unknown space,
******* with lace,
with a disfigured face,
completely full of mace,
and a strange case
of something poisonous.

People diein' on the streets.
****** puddles at our feets.

But we could be a family.
We could be a whole.
We could be together.
But no one could be cold.

If we could live on an island,
no hate,
no guns,
no war.
We'd look back and wonder,
what was it all for?

People diein' on the streets.
****** puddles at our feets.

Gangs,
tempts,
nudes,
exempts.

We sit at desk,
eating or eaten.
we laughed at or laughing.
beating or bleedin'.

We know the truth, but call it cruel.
The cruel one is we, the blind fool.

People diein' on the streets
****** puddles at our feets.

Who shot the most guns?
Who then killed them all?
Who didn't mind a casualty?
Who could be responsible?

"Not me!" we cry,
"I'm a good soul."
But even if we declined,
can I be told where they go?

Yesterday was sour, so today will be sweet.
Today was bitter, so tomorrow will be neat.
I just have to hold on tight.
Slide down 1,2,1,2.
And I know I'll be alright,
but fixing this is something I can't do.

I've been cursed a gruesome pain. I must spend odd days feeling insane. But even, my smile will be on the other days. Still is it worth the tragedy it pays? If I could run from fate, I wouldn't wait. I'd go so far away. I wouldn't look back any day.

The first kid was a rat. Oh he was so crude and mean. He said:
"Make her eat that!" and pointed to dirt-drenched, ice cream.
The second kid was a sucker for shows. He laughed and such a stupid pose.
But girls have power too ya know.
Girls tend to be smart, and...oh no...
She scooped the food, tears down her eyes, bidding her last goodbyes. Up it went, leaving no traces....

Up to the sky! "Wham!" Into their faces. She laughed and ran on full speed. Jumped a bush and climbed a tree.

"She's like a squirrel!" The first boy yelled.
"Well get up there and push her down!"

The second boy was looking high.
The girl giggled and mocked "So boys do cry."
The second boy ran off, and chickened out.
The first boy said," I can get you no doubt!"
He hopped and hopped and grasped the first branch, then he swung and swung, but couldn't touch the next.
While he struggled so hard the girl, quietly climbed down.
He'd never figure, she was on the other side, on the ground.
She slowly tipped away and went on, back home.
The boys best learn their lessons, and leave this girl **alone

I'm an *** of a friend, and I sowwy.
Waking you up for my problems, I know.
Always bugging you about my insecurities.
I swear, wrecking you life's not my goal.
I get mad at you when I have dog days.
And I'm too shy, to pummel those who talk ****.
But I swear to you, this is not what I'm trying to do.
This is not what you deserve.
This is not what you should get.

You never whine to me.
I don't know how you keep things confined,
but ya know, maybe im wrong.
Maybe there is no sorrow inside.

What I'm trying to say is..
thank you for being there.
For holding me up ALLL the time.
Thank you and you're the best,
I would always offer up,
and break you out,
if you committed crime

You wrote me off,
so I'll write you on.
You see,
when you leave,
you just provide inspiration.
So in the end just who used who?
It's pretty **** simple,
"I used you."
You probably wished
I would sob away life.
But that's so inhumane,
why run,
when I can fly?
You probably thought,
I'd plead you to stay,
but nah..
to be honest,
I'm feeling really okay.
I don't care about
the things you said,
the things you did,
or the things you tried so hard to hide.
In two years or so,
I won't even remember you're name.
"He did that to me? Oh what a shame."
Now for once,
I'll give you what you want,
and this time you can't complain.
I'll write you into this poem,
and soon enough you'll have fame.

Often I think I'd scream,
"but no one listens,"
but no one listens.

I drank the alcohol, expecting something.
boy was I let down, when I got nothing.
No silly laughter, or grand horror story.
No youtube video, or easy talk for me.
Just a headache or two and a feeling of suffocation.
Just a scolding from people, and a dizzy sensation.
The bottle looked nice, and tv shows made it seem fun,
but after 3 gulps, I just felt like a street ***.
So I said goodbye to armpit beer,
and I assure no rose wine here.
*** is for pirates,
much too complicated for me.
I'm done with heartache alcohol,
as you can plainly see.

He bit the curb.
Does that make you disturbed?
She laughed at tears.
Does that deepen your fears?
They don't know when to stop.
There's no stop signs in this town.
If it's you, life's sad.
But if it's them they shouldn't make a sound.
Some don't fit in,
and they just can't help it,
no matter where they been.
I guess no one really developed it.

Whom I kiddin?
Some people are fake,
on the outside their only,
the character they make.

"Who wants to run like me?
Who wants to get away?
I look around,
but they all seem A-okay."
Well if he judged you,
He'd seem to be just fine.
But you'd never guess,
He's scared of being left behind.
If she beat you and spit in your face,
you'd figure she was spoiled,
but her life was just so misplaced.

Why do they have to smile?
Why do they have to drown?
Why do they have to go away,
after smashing into cold, hard ground?

I'd say you need a lesson,
but you've probably had one too.
Stop being arrogant,
if there's one thing that you do.

They've seen the grey clouds,
and you've seen the rain.
And surprisingly we've all gone insane.
So why drive us mad?
Why call us bad?
Make us sad?
What have I done?
Nothing,
but yet I'm being pushed.
Off my feet, off the swings, off the air, off the edge.
By you, by them, by me, by life?
I'm going to stand here,
and proclaim to the skies.
"For once, let this life be mine!"
"And please vanish the outer lies!"

I want to run.
Be free.
Be the little girl they see in me,
but plot-twist happen frequently,
opening your eyes to things you didn't see.
Burning the cheerful into your mind.
If only I didn't once leave that behind.
If I could return to those naive, fun days.
But fun was out and sad was in,
so I figured "well okay."
I dived right in,
singeing my skin,
turning me to the pit.
I was told,
"don't follow your instincts",
so I guess this is what I get.
Now I sit alone,
a pitiful lump of coal,
as a dog without bone,
or soccer ball with no goal.
I'm heading to "God knows where"
on a train called "Oopsy Days,"
and when I arrive,
they will all be amazed.
For I am the writer
who will give them a story,
for I am a lighter,
and my flame gives me glory.

If you were the saw to a magic box,
I'd be the one inside.
If you forgot the spell to make me whole,
I'd be fine just with you alone.
If you grew tired of my half-self,
i'd conceal it somehow,
long as you smile.
Because you,
you,
are the love of my life.

If you were gone,
I'd chase you.
If it seems too dramatic,
I beg of you,
notice the truth in these lines.
Look in the mirror,
and gaze as I do,
at the light you shine.
Because you,
you,
are a mystery,
even with all I know.

What is wrong?
You don't sing the normal song.
Your tune is so off,
the words all seem so wrong.
You're losing your mind?
You're falling apart?
This can't be out of the blue.
Just when did this start?
What don't you understand?
I can't help, if I don't know.
                                                           ­           What is wrong?
                                                          ­                      I'm trying to explain,
                                                        ­                   and I don't know why,
                                                            ­           but I feel so very vain,
                                                           ­                what was the song,
                                                           ­            I used to sing?
                                                           ­             I'm trying so hard.
                                                           ­            I'm on shattered glass.
                                                          ­          I'm holding these rocks,
                                                          ­       no, boulders of the past.
                                                           ­       I cry out to you,
                                                            ­    but what could you do?
                                                             ­       I'm so scared.
                                                         ­               I'm not strong.
What is wrong?
Please tell me what's wrong?
Why are you scared?
I know, you're not strong.
I don't know how to save you.
I'm no hero, you know.
I'm trying so hard to help you,
but I'm stuck in the front row.
We all love you,
just please,
tell us just what is it you need?
So that we can help you,
and heal as you bleed.
                                                          ­ What is wrong?
                                                          ­     I've changed.
                                                        ­          I'm running from my life.
                                                           ­                I've lost that 'optimistic' me.
                                                             ­           Now who am I left to be?
                                                        Have I fallen like an angel?
                                                          ­           Or am I still on earth?
                                                          ­              Why is pain so painful?
                                                        ­                   Just when did I disperse?
                                                       ­                 Where am I,
                                                              ­        if i'm not here?
                                                            Somehow I just disappear?
                                                      ­            I'm unstable.
                                                       ­                  Save me.
                                                             ­   Save me.
                                                             ­        Save me.
                                                             ­         I plead.
                                                          ­    Tell me the answer I really need.
What    is    wrong-                                      with me?

Eyes of glass, in the ocean, deep and blue.
Like fabric of white-
worn to grey.
No where in this world are there people to shiver,
yet the people, we live without day.
No morn' to see.
No rooster to crow.
No light to show our way,
yet we as humans',
lives continue,
while our mother's love makes us okay.
There be..
there be..
moonlight..
dear be..
lukewarm water,
so in which it sway.
If I may run,
I may yonder,
for I'm a mere symbol,
a minnow.
To which will force up ponder,
if rather or not,
the fishy is gay.

This is not the person you once knew,
my face is dried and thin.
I haven't got the faintest clue,
how the picture remains,
nor who,
why,
or when.
I only recall some old 'honey' song
And how every line would begin,
"I love, love, love you."
As if to not speak of love was a sin.
I no longer know what to say or do,
struggling to remorse here once again.
It hasn't been very long,
but I feel I have forgotten the feel of your skin.

I see you in a light,
for the ideas you don't seal tight.
The light changes with each 'you',
for all the simple things you do.

I just want someone to care.
To notice, when I'm not there.
To stay by my side.
To let me cry.
I don't want to be judged.
I just want to be loved.
I don't care how far,
I don't care if you've receded,
I just want to know
that I am needed.
It's not creepy.
Certainly not.
It's just odd,
to read what's been thought.
I love the imaginary,
who exists.
I love the birds,
and bees.
I love the sky,
and seas.
I'm waiting.
I'm watching.
Watching the world.
Thinking about it,
I've come to notice.
You help me even now.
Because I don't know who you are,
I spend so much time thinking,
wondering,
contemplating elatedly,
to the point I don't even think,
about..
the world anymore.

All I care about it this beautiful,
wondrous,
ponderous,
distraction of mine.
And this image in my mind,
it may not be you,
but I may know some day.
This love is true.
This love is so much.
I don't even know what to do.
This love of mine,
I await.
I will wait.
I'm waiting.
I'm watching.
Watching the world.
The world will pass me by,
and in the end..
I will have you,
and hold your hand.
The collected dust,
will tell a story.

It all starts like a brick,
heavy,
shifting in your head.
You wish it'd just be lightning quick,
but it often tends to stay instead.

It makes you question everything,
No, you're not dead.
It's all in your head.
Just go back to bed.
By the way, you can't fix your problem with a med.

It's a cry
It's a scream
It's a begging self-philosophy.
I hold it up with a lie.
If it were a dream,
it wouldn't feel so real to me.

A storm in your mind,
all the creatures combine,
building up pressure,
they'll say that you're fine.
But that's not true,
they will lie to you,
then say there is nothing they can do.
They will fake,
your mind will bake.
It's not a feeling you can shake.
A lot is at stake.
I know.
I know where you go.
Digging yourself a dark, lonely hole.
Scratching out death, is your goal.
My migraine, is like a permanent stain.
Killing me; driving you insane.
I count the days like a prisoner in a cage.
I know how it feels, I still stand upon that stage.
Trying to withstand the rage,
and flip page by page,
but you can't even engage.
Since I was a kid,
it was no secret what the pain did,
yet I never hid.
I would just explode,
implode,
and be the **** you'd discover on the road,
maybe one day they will find a code.

And we all walk a lane,
for those who suffered this pain,
the agony of the grain.
That mysteriously grows in our brain.

Hey, say, do you like to play?
I loved to play, until that day.
The sky was dim, and there stood him.
The man who'd skim across my skin.
I falter of this 'hope' raft, "bye bye" I say, while away it draft.
I hold this shaft. my finding? I so daft.
I tremble thee, I, fallen angel, falling from heaven is painful.
My sanity is stable. My sanity is stable. My sanity is stable, would be quite the fable.
"That's just life" they say, but that makes me question why we stay.
"Mayday!" I note, "mayday!" My self-pity finally has gone and lead me astray.
I've become the cat-dog rain, screaming "save me," grain by grain.
I shall continue to abstain, until I prove, I'm now insane.

She could die any day.
Just tip-toe away.
                                                                But what would they say?
They still say she's okay.
                                                                      ...They don't say "please stay."
They cry when good men die.
They cry when they are scared.
They cry all the time.
They cry here.
They cry there.
So why?
                                                                                             Why?
Why for her,                                                               they don't cry?

Here she will fly                                                     between fire and sky,
                                                                                         in an ocean
her only air being devotion.
Life&Death; her only notion.
                                                                        Is it bad to wish for a potion?
A spell to make this spell go?
She may try so-,
                                                                                  but I just don't know.
Why?
                                                                                              Why?
                                                                                  Why can't they see?

The lost,
the falling,
she's calling
she gives them a sign,
she loses grasp of her life's line.
Why?
                                                                                              Why?
                                                                                  Why don't they cry?

Cry for her.
Care for her!
See her here!
                                                                                         Please..
                                                                                                   one tear.
Suppress her deepest fear.
Her pain is not mere.
She WILL fall,
if there is no bridge,
between the buildings in her mind.
She WILL tumble,
down,
if no one holds her hand,
and she get's left behind.
Save her.
Savor her.
For like this she will not last.
Deprived of what she needs,
internally she bleeds.
                                                                                             Cry
for just one day.
Prove to her,
she will be okay.
Teach her,
how to no be alone.
Love her,
don't leave her on her own.
                                                                                             Cry
Don't lie to her.
Don't act so refined.
She knows those lies,
she isn't blind.
And for once,
just for once,
when her thoughts have intertwined,
I beg of you,
I plead of you,
no one leave her behind.

No more dying
No more lying
No more crying
No more "why"ing
It's hard to keep
up with life
when in my hand, I hold a knife.
A friend of mine,
from long ago.
A life I feel,
I do not know.
My memories,
seem more like seas
of joy,
oh boy,
but that's not me.
Smiling inside,
I'd never be.
I'm the kid
inside the joke.
The joke inside of me.
I'm the kid
confused,
abused,
misused,
no news,
bad views,
refuse-
ing
to ever enjoy anything.
I will not sing,
nor bring,
a bit of sugar to the table,
I'm unstable.
The silent ticking bomb,
only doing things I know are wrong.
Echos piercing my ear drums,
from the bottom of dramatic lungs.
Staring at the sun for thrill,
a shriek of hope much like a pill.
I will only lie for me,
not for you,
can you not see?
I will only die for I,
it's far too simple
to say goodbye.

I can't do this anymore.

HELP!                                                        I'm falling apart on the floor.

Sleeping has become my only score.

I've can't even cry.
                                                                      Must be strong for the poor.

I'm okay on the outside.
                                                                   I'm crashing down in the core.

Tell me "It's okay."
                                                          Let me blindly love tomorrow's day.

I want to speak,
                                                  but sometimes, there's nothing left to say.

I want to smile..
                                                    ..but no..
                                                                                               I'm not okay.
I'll never admit it.
                                                                                      I fall apart everyday.

I was heading to "Out The Window",
                                                                        but hit a *** hole on the way.

Am I even trying?
         Why am I always lying-
                                                ..on this floor..
begging,
pleading,
stressing,
for more than I have the courage                                        ..to ask for?..

I look at lights,
Laying beat and battered,
hoping,
thanking,
proud to cry,
I simply stare,
to greet my maker,
welcomed in by midnight sky.
I lived a great life,
I die a great death,
I saved my country,
I paved the world a new path.
No coins,
a shame,
but it's worth what I name.
Victory!
I bow,
vicotrious,
I bow to many,
I bow to all.
And now...
I fall.

I exit the stage,
but the actor still lays.
I know the faking hurts,
but I learn it often pays.

I scream inside,
but it echos from the corners that I hid.
I get tired of all I tried,
but getting told, "You lied."

Cherry tree, cherry tree,
please won't you,
fall down on me?

I close my eyes for a brief,
but non-stop horror gives me grief.
I beg for some relief,
but I am buried deep beneath the reef.

I see the sky with hopeful eyes,
but inside the sun the devil maybe lies.
I know my clinging causes sighs,
but I fall apart after goodbyes.

Cherry tree, cherry tree,
please won't you,
fall down on me?

If I were a caterpillar,
curious and small,
I'd wonder the world,
and never judge what I saw.

If I were a butterfly,
fragile and lone,
I'd fly off to places,
I've never known.

If I were a bird,
so high and free,
I'd quickly fly,
yelling, "wheeee!"

But,
of all the things I could be,
I think,
I'd want to be a tree.
A giving tree per-say,
perchance,
around me,
all the children dance.
Spins and swings,
laughs and tears.
I'd want to remove,
someone's fears.
I do love the air,
and the sea,
still I'd rather be a simple tree.
Of course,
that's just me.

I lose my breath,
I lose my mind,
I lose my thought,
I fall behind.
As my cogs,
begin to grind,
I lose my footing,
I intertwine.