Maybe it was the way he walks with his head up high, or the way he whistles, or the way he carried his yellow umbrella down the hall, or maybe even the fact it was raining made me fall so deeply in love with him.

Oh God,
please forgive  me,
but I'm afraid
he's the one
I'll sin for.

Ramsha 1d

I'll be OK for
a few days
but then
it hits me,
I
stop functioning
and everything
falls apart
Again........

Amanda 2d

Honestly, I never knew that you,
Would ever mean this much to me,
I never imagined that one day,
This was how things were going to be.

I never thought that i would hold you,
Or miss your voice, your smile, your touch,
I guess I should have known that you,
Would make me care about you too much.

I cant get you out of my head,
Im always hoping youll text or call,
Im losing my mind and i love it,
Im scared but i crave the rush of the fall.

It's been so long since I've felt like this,
Excited to wake up every day,
I wish I could spend each moment with you,
When were apart i ponder words you say.

When we were young i never thought,
That I would come to love your eyes so blue,
I never knew that I could feel this way,
About you, but im glad that I do.

The beings inside of mirror stare at me,
They never utter a word when I weep,
Allowing all of the strange thoughts to zip around my mind.

I can never share what the voices tell me,
So all I can do it shed these tears,
And let the fears slowly eat away at me.

Not able to make sense of these different feelings,
So silence is now my frenemy.

If I came out as who I am,
If I share who I truly am,
Will I be accepted?
Can I finally lay asleep, and no longer weep?

"No, no" The voices tell me,
Making me kiss silence again, and to keep down,
Before the courage can even lighten the lamp inside my head.

So I shall stay silent about the different, strange person that I am,
No one will know the different someone inside of me.

Keeping silent about who you truly.

I hate hieghts, it reminds me of falling. And falling, is a sensation that i can never get used too.  I feel helpless, i feel like, i’m out of control.  I feel like, life has completely taken over me, and the only thing i can ever do is, let life take it’s course. And ride here as a passenger.  What is it with falling?  Why do we fall?  Why do we take chances, and take a leap, even if we know that, it’s the most terrifying thing you could ever do with one's life.  Do we all get pleasure with fear? or is it something beyond that?   I hate falling….

JAC 6d

"For a moment,"
Said their lips,
Warm, but fleeting

"It's okay,"
Said the rain,
Falling again

"I missed you,"
Said your bed,
Empty and tired

"Not today,"
Said the night,
Long and dull

"Maybe next time,"
Said the morning,
Sleepy and still

"Just wait,"
Said the week,
Dragging on

"Just breathe,"
Said the sidewalk,
Every day

"You're fine,"
Said the wind,
Colder than them

"I need you,"
Said your heart,
Resigned and dry

"..."
Said your lips,
Silent.

I'm a write this one in blood
Straight from the arteries
Of my heart, I'm stuck
In situation overload
Currents on overflow
And I can't fight this feeling
Killing me slowly
(On the inside)
There's something deep in my soul
I'm losing, being taken over
I've lost all function in my body
Guess I'll just lay here on the floor
Can't find the will
To keep on walking anymore
Maybe I should just crawl
Nah leave me here
In this dark room
With just these memories of you

Crown me the King of failure
I failed myself
For believing your lies
I failed myself for thinking
There could have ever been a us
Crown me the King of failure
For failing myself
For not listening to what was being, said in my head

I'm crushed
Crashing my dreams
Wanted so bad to believe
You were the one
I got crushed
Betrayed by emotions
All over again
I've been, crushed.
Yeah crushed
Crushed, by love

Oh, girl, I'm not even
The slightest bit mad
I'm just really sad
That you would lie like this to me
You said that you trusted me
You said there was no boundary between us
Remember when you said that
How could you let those words come out?
When none of this was true
I won't suffer in your silence
I won't let that hurt form into violence
And in your ignorance
Maybe I hurt
Maybe I fall
But I won't let this destroy my soul

Crown me the King of failure
I failed myself
For believing your lies
I failed myself for thinking
There could have ever been a us
Crown me the King of failure
For failing myself
For not listening to what was being, said in my head

I'm crushed
Crashing my dreams
Wanted so bad to believe
You were the one
I got crushed
Betrayed by emotions
All over again
I've been, crushed
Yeah crushed
Crushed, by love.

Oh gotta stay strong
Keep holding on
Find a way to move on
Yeah gotta keep moving forward
Keep looking straight
And don't lose focus
Come on I know you know this
Never wanted to give up
Never wanted to give in
Thought we could have worked out everything
But your choice has been made
You never wanted me to stay
Why could you never just say that to me
Why couldn't you just be completely honest with me

Crown me the King of failure
I failed myself
For believing your lies
I failed myself for thinking
There could have ever been a us
Crown me the King of failure
For failing myself
For not listening to what was being, said in my head

I'm crushed
Crashing my dreams
Wanted so bad to believe
You were the one
I got crushed
Betrayed by emotions
All over again
I've been, crushed
Yeah crushed
Crushed, by love.

It's time to let go
Shut the door
You left me all alone
To work this out on my own
Typing lines on my phone
At least you were kind enough
To leave me new material
Got so much I could write an album
You'll never see me drowning
These emotions that you left,
were only a challenge.
Just a test
You didn't want me at my worst
You'll never get me at my best
All right, oh yes
I'm getting over it
Yeah I'm moving past this

Crown me the King of failure
I failed myself
For believing your lies
I failed myself for thinking
There could have ever been a us
Crown me the King of failure
For failing myself
For not listening to what was being, said in my head

I'm crushed
Crashing my dreams
Wanted so bad to believe
You were the one
I got crushed
Betrayed by emotions
All over again
I've been, crushed
Yeah crushed
Crushed, by love.

©2017 Written By Benji James

Benji James May 16

She's in love with him
While I'm in love with her
Through my eyes, I can see
Now that we are both cursed
That's when the feelings hurt
Somehow we don't think it can get
Any worse, and now I know why
She couldn't put me first.
When she loved him for so long
And it's not weakness for trying to be strong
I know for a while, I was gone
Couldn't stand the fact you loved him
Over me but now I can see
Why you picked him over me
Us together may feel so wrong
But how does this feel so right?
Hunni just speak to me just tell me why
Should we do this on our own?
We don't need to be forever alone.

My minds in space
But I'm stuck on this earth
It spins, and it turns
Just can't seem to find the words
Can't you hear the hummingbirds
Speaking tongue in cheek
Came to find, the colour that we seek
Just don't leave me weak
Because I'm just not at my peak
Together we can breathe
If you just speak to me.

Just couldn't reach those heights
Fell back out from the skies
Black mascara smudged under her eyes
We are each other's angels in disguise
How can I prove I'm here to provide?
Take some words from the wise.
Sticks and stones are hard on bones
Aimed with angry art
Words can sting like anything
But silence breaks the heart
on this, I promise I'll play my part
Let's not leave each other lonely in the dark

You and I are one in the same
I'd rather live with the pain
Then live without you and go insane
Don't need to get caught in the rain
Suddenly it hits you like a train
Then every step you take
Starts to hurt your brain
We got each other tied into a chain
I lost control of this plane
I can be your superman
If you would be my Louise Lane

My minds in space
But I'm stuck on this earth
It spins, and it turns
Just can't seem to find the words
Can't you hear the hummingbirds
Speaking tongue in cheek
Came to find, the colour that we seek
Just don't leave me weak
Because I'm just not at my peak
Together we can breathe
If you just speak to me.

Just couldn't reach those heights
Fell back out from the skies
Black mascara smudged under her eyes
We are each other's angels in disguise
How can I prove I'm here to provide?
Take some words from the wise.
Sticks and stones are hard on bones
Aimed with angry art
Words can sting like anything
But silence breaks the heart
on this, I promise I'll play my part
Let's not leave each other lonely in the dark

Just couldn't find each other's, love
Can feel your heartbeat
Pumping through my blood
Just to have you back would be enough
To kickstart this sugar rush
Although I didn't win the race
I still need you in this place
Thought this was just a phase
Couldn't overcome this craze
Somehow I'm still amazed
By everything that you gave
How do I put that into a phrase?
Because I just can't find a way
To tell you the things I want to say

My minds in space
But I'm stuck on this earth
It spins, and it turns
Just can't seem to find the words
Can't you hear the hummingbirds
Speaking tongue in cheek
Came to find, the colour that we seek
Just don't leave me weak
Because I'm just not at my peak
Together we can breathe
If you just speak to me.

Just couldn't reach those heights
Fell back out from the skies
Black mascara smudged under her eyes
We are each other's angels in disguise
How can I prove I'm here to provide?
Take some words from the wise.
Sticks and stones are hard on bones
Aimed with angry art
Words can sting like anything
But silence breaks the heart
on this, I promise I'll play my part
Let's not leave each other lonely in the dark

©2017 Written By Benji James

I want to fall in love,
But only if it's returned.
My heart is aiming at you,
While still in resting mode.
The way you kiss my cheek,
Or run your fingers through my hair;
Forces my fingers to gently tug,
At this bow and arrow.

There's so much passion in your eyes,
When we're laying side by side.
Sometimes you touch me with no control,
As if your mind has gone inside.
And other times your hands are so gentle,
As if I'm the most precious treasure you've ever behold.

Falling asleep in your arms,
Is the safest place I know.
Your lips brushing against mine,
The sweetest taste of all.
Our fingers intertwined,
So lost in this new love.

5/30/2016
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