Sent a bullshit note calling it an apology
And a phone with a promise that if I needed you all I had to do was call
And I’d be tempted
If your shield never came crashing down on my chest
This is a Civil War
The moment I realize what I’ve always known
I was never your friend
This is the part of the story where you abandon me
In the middle of nowhere
But it’s not like you were ever there
Shattered my armor, made of iron, into a million pieces
They said engineers could fix anything
Create a brighter, better, brand new future
So I’ll spend the rest of my life fixing my broken heart
This is a Civil War
The moment we disregard peace negotiations
No compromises, it’s all your fault
This is where I stop following orders and take control
I’ll take my chances with the guilt
As it swallows me alive
The longest hours of my life
Waiting in a hospital room
Playing with the lighter,
You gave to me,
As everything you ever said and everything I never said
Came crashing down like that shield on my chest
This is a Civil War
I woke up shouting in the best way
Trembling limbs, anxious heart
But I won’t back down
This is the end of the story
This time I refuse kneel before your monarchy
This Civil War is mine
our president is
waging Thumb Wars
pressing the button
another pinball appears
he pulls back the spring
and hits send
watching the vociferous orb
encapsulated with incorrigibility
ricochet across the continents
across every neighborhood
bing bing boing
the barricades throb
and eyes light up
as the points
begin to rack up
he got-ta new-high score
such big thumbs
for such tiny hands
I sometimes wonder,
the brave and infallible
who kill each other and die
for their countries,
on reaching the gates
of either heaven or hell
what would they say
to each other?
would they still have
the hate or rage
that pushed them to an extent
of killing each other
or would they share a common grief
over what mutual hate did to their lives
and brought their bodies feets below
the ground, rotting and dying slowly,
The queen commands,
Battalions defend at once!
The battleship is pounding on her shores;
and past defensive lines extends
the front of the invading force,
rallying the troops,
the enemy is pouring through the doors.
Her thoughts are soldiers finally expired.
Her generals now under heavy fire.
Yet she's the one who, after all,
this battle, skillfully, provoked.
It seems that she forgot
that cold wars can turn hot.
She managed for awhile to slow down the assault.
Now the end draws nigh when final hill embattled falls.
You vowed to protect our country, the lives of others worlds.
No fear, they teach you, live inside a shell.
You love just as others do, hidden only for a few to see.
Death is not to fear for you, as bravery allows none.
The battlefield is painful, especially for the young. Shocking as the reality is not of what they thought it was.
One out of many times you make it back to stateside. A few more of your brothers left behind, the images grow stronger staying with you forever.
This time I knew when you kissed me, something was different, you said you were never going back, that was long ago, those words were never spoken again.
The struggle to fit in. No peace for you. I knew I married a Solider, lived my life for you. Stood by your side, with every award of honor, every rank of promotion, so very proud of you.
Off you went to the other side of the world, just one more time. I will be here waiting for you till the end of time.
I removed the television, as the news of war continued to wear on me. All the loss of our troops, many friends and some were family.
Months had passed no words from you. I always worried about you.
A knock at the front door, on this cold winter night.
It was snowing heavily, thought crossed my mind, not to answer the door. The dogs didn't bark thus time making the quest even harder than the times before.
I slowly open the door to see what I dreaded many times before. The young officers standing straight and tall asked if they could come inside as the weather was very cold. I stepped back and let them in the door.
Silence seemed to last forever. My mind was already numb. As the officer handed me a package, he began to speak of you. Details were minimal, the words he spoke, I watched his face and lips move, but not hearing his words. A tear rolled from his eye as he said there was nothing I could do.
You are on a new journey now. Still fighting the wars. Lonesome in this house of ours. Now it's time for my tour. Maybe we will meet again on that long road of war..