Mother don't cry, Have I disappointed you? I know I have. I know when I have, it ***** that I do. And I’m sorry that despite my best efforts, I am not the child that will check what expectations fill your list, But rather, am the one that will make you create new ones.
It would be terrible if you found out But I think you'd still talk to me after some time You might already know But the problem is you're too much of a gentlemen To let me know that you know what I know about you But they know The people you know And who's to stop their delicate pink folds of skin Trap the sound vibrations inside their mouth Before their warm breath fogs up the crisp air The secret escaping
I'd be so easy for them to open wide And let it out like a lightning strike Shocking news of untold truth It's okay I'd understand The temptation of gossip is hard to withstand
I could hardly keep it in myself My blushes and laughs Wanting to hang out at sunset Like distant thunder claps getting closer and closer Tempting the lightning to strike Right here, the roof I am under
Meanwhile your eyes were on her So how much of me you registered I'm not so sure But you're a kind gentleman You'd never say Instead, let it all fade away With the breeze of a cool fall day
So, when we get coffee or lunch Never dinner or brunch I staple my mouth shut Take no chances on weak lips Leaking trembling heart vibrations Someday, 8 years from now Thunder will clap softly in the background I'll let my lips speak freely The truth crawling out Covered by the dust of 10 years of memories Thunder getting louder and louder now "I was in love with you once, ..." Lighting strikes Burns this roof down Deep breath, I pause Let no more sound speak its cause That's enough lightening for one day Any more sound and the whole town will burn down Once again I'll pull out my office supplies That I once shoved in back corner of my mind And staple my lips closed again At least now he knows what I thought he knew And what they knew And what I knew since the day I saw you in the library room
Far off in a distance Thunder claps again Faint, but creeping ever closer How soon will it be Till lightning strikes another dismembered tree?
its been two weeks, where are You? You told me this would work. You gave me the instruction manual and taught me the most efficient way. You taught me exactly where pieces went, the perfect lethal concoction. was no one else informed? the plan was simple, one incision, several empty bottles. one ride home. what happened? i signed the paperwork, packed my paperbag filled with two days of meaningless papers, i did the workshops, talked to the suits and told them everything. You gave simple instructions, two phone calls a day, say nothing, do everything. You didn't come to meet me at first. i waited, i put it off for hours, You promised to be there. You were supposed to be. it doesn't matter anyways, if You're not here yet, You will be. traffic is bad, it has to be. You wouldn't miss this. You're picking me up today it's in the plan it's in the manual it's in the letters it's the only thing You prepared me for.
My need for you to love me far exceeds my ability to let you love me. I get in my own way, it's all I've ever known. I played this card so long I may never find my own home. In me, in you, and the desperation of two lovers. You're the rope that tied my binds, the graceful veil to hide my naive eyes. I always assumed there were others, just not enough for you to cross lines. I watch my light die in your eyes, the way we embrace like fall after summer highs. Longevity may be lost, but those elemental, your whole world, you cant easily toss. My heartache is the new beat. My pain the chorus as it repeats. You have my all so I've got nothing left, just a stupid boy who made his own bed.