My hands reached out to them,
My heart cried, all for them,
But my eyes were shut,
They couldn’t see that
it was me who was hurt.
Hurt, deeper than I thought I ever could be,
But there was no one, ever for me.
People came in and went by,
And I sat there singing lullabies.
Lullabies, telling the tales of
Friendships turned into hatred,
Of loves lost to the fated.
Tears shedding, as my cry deceases,
I put myself back into pieces.
Days went by since I last saw the sun,
But the love for them was never really undone.
Today, when I sit here beside the sunrise,
I see myself in the skies.
Leaning onto the window,
I sing some lullabies,
And this time, they are of
New love found and the beautiful sunshine.
Beyond miseries of my broken heart
Lives the shattered pieces fallen apart
The player has made it into a jigsaw
Putting the pieces on high verge and low
Each piece is dipped into a pool of red ink
Soaking blank pages, while dried to shrink
With a sharp knife, the player craves a shape
A 3-D formation tucked in with a tape
The shape of a heart to replace the broken part
The broken heart now a 3-D paper art
Hoping for a beat, the player hears a cry
The shape is applauding, you made a good try
But the paper soon withered along with the ink
That left the player wondering to think
Why such an experiment was of need
His own 3-D paper made heart could not seed
The real feel and the love for he could not see
Now, insanely crying for his love, that was me...
I: I slept in your sweater the first week here and it was the only thing that kept me sane at night.
II: I met a boy who made me laugh when I got off the phone with you in tears.
III: I kept seeing this boy everywhere and we always had something witty to say.
IV: I told you about this boy and you became winter to my spring.
V: I got drunk with the boy and we talked for hours and I told him about you.
VI: He didn't like you.
VII: You came up four hours to visit but it wasn't me you were here for.
VIII: I broke the promise I made that I would never cry over you again.
IX: This boy and I got drunk, spilled secrets, had sex, and smoked cigarettes.
X: The boy bought me Plan B and more cigarettes only hours later.
XI: I thought you couldn't get any colder.
XII: You led me on. You wouldn't tell me you are dating her.
XIII: I cried.
XIV: You left.
XV: I left too.
Left me, why?
Your love was a lie
From a distance
You waved me, a goodbye
You said sorry
Making another story
Said not to worry
This was the other day
When you came to say,
That you got a job
And you are going away
I would have forgiven you
If you were honest with me
But you changed my view
To see the ongoing reality
I am upset, I did cry
I am shattered and you know why
But I am not going to try
To get you back
You left me, I understand
And since you've moved on
I'll put my feelings to the end
And let my broken heart mend
I hope you don't cheat again
With whom your life has just begun
My life, consumed in unthinkable pain
The ink of my pen, now a pointless gun...
I'm hollowing out.
You put me through the wringer.
What do you want from me?
I gave you all I could off me.
I told you not to break my heart..my trust.
I loved you with ALL of my soul.
Seems it was all for nothing.
I've been broken before.
I loved you.
I meant every kiss.
I don't know what to feel.
My feelings are dissolving away with each tear.
You don't know the extent of my past.
You don't know how battered I've been.
The lengths I've been dragged through.
The secret I keep within.
Don't push me too far off the edge because I will not wake up to you.
I have so much pain inside.
Mental & emotional abuse hits the hardest.
I feel myself dying inside again.
The light keeps fading from my eyes.
My heart keeps beating off tune.
It's sitting fragile in my chest.
My skin keeps aching for an electric touch.
My mind is so far away.
I keep reaching out to pull it back but it's getting harder & harder.
Worst part is that no one cares..
When I'm not here don't look for me.
Wherever I need people the most they take the knife and twist it in harder.
Don't look for me.
Don't speak to me.
Don't touch me.
Don't hurt me ever again.
You seem saddened, They say
they don't have a clue
I tell them my feelings and they don't know what to do
If my emotion had a colour it'd be greyish blue
I only feel happy when I'm with you
and through all of the lies this is true
But I'm antique, and you wanted someone new
She would cry every day
ask why it had to be this way
why was she the one that had to pay
and how her emotions swayed
her life was quite delayed
she spent all her time inside
But not because she wanted to hide
It was just to confide
in false emotions and lies
At school no one would hear her sighs
or her bathroom cries
And no matter how hard she tries
she'll always just be the girl that cries
At every situation
And people are so toxic it's like radiation
But it's not funny when she ends up on the news station
The skeleton on my shirt that matches
The pain in my head as
Letters pop up on my phone I cannot read
Behind me and
The more I fight my medication that
Whispers to me
"Sleep. Morning will come. The day is done. Smile."
The more I fidget and
The more I write and
The more I cry has it
Screaming to me and
I faint knowing I am nothing more than
Pills in bottles.