TG 1h

Perhaps the problem is we live as though we have an eternity to fall in love, to have everything we want,
to be able to fix all the problems we ignore and to apologize to those we hurt.  We live as though we are more than stellar fragments afloat in the immensity of space and time.
The problem is that we continue living this way until the last insignificant second when we finally hear the chimes of the cosmic harmonies calling us back home and then, we will be nothing but a wisp of nebulosity from gas and dust from whence we came,
scattered through space unfettered by ordinary human limitations.

How will you spend your brief moments here on earth?
How much will you love?
How much will you give?
How will you be remembered?

These are the thoughts that are haunting me today.

I caught my first bass yesterday
and you weren't there
I was all by myself
and it was a big one
I was so proud
and I wanted you to see
because I knew you would
be proud of me too
I even imagined
your tight lipped grin
as I held my phone up
to snap the pic
of me and my catch
so excited I cut off half of the bass
And then I caught my second
and you still weren't there
and I picked up my phone
to send you the pictures
and I remembered how
you swore on everything
you cared for
that you hoped you never
had to see or hear from me again
and I thought to myself
they're shitty pictures anyway
and you probably wouldn't
be that proud
probably wouldn't even care
and I put my phone back
in my backpack
and I sat on the rocks alone
and cast my line
out into the water again

I miss you.

I was missing green eyes
and 20 different faces
and I was too shy
and too armoured
a little too strange
a little too awkward
perhaps thats all why
you could never love me
I always thought
you looked for reasons to leave
but they were all right there
it was just me
I was a little too me

but I loved you with every beat of my weird heart. I still do. Always will.

pendulum petals
pieces of flesh
fall of my bones
faring gravity
the closer I get
the lighter I am
my right
my left
          He loves me.
          He loves me  not.

                  -Raquel Echanique

and then we came across each other,
he didn't even throw a glance
He seems happy, better
It felt like he never knew me,
that he never seemed to like how my dimples formed when I smile
that's when I realized--
I never mattered to him,
not even once.

i'd want to say
that you're my happiness
but i'm scared, mostly
of this temporary bliss

we both don't want ourselves hurt.

A foolish heart knows no bounds,
falling over and over
like a gentle whimper of a child
but yet,
still looking up with a vulnerable hope
a yearning questioning
for the affection
of the averted gaze.

A foolish heart sees no truth,
staggering in a room full of thorns
only to proclaim
that the spaces between
are whispers
silent expressions of
a secret love
that they wish to see.

A foolish heart hears no rejection,
for its all a projection
of a nightmarish confusion
while the truth
no matter how sought for
at the seam,
and the foolish heart continues
on with its caramel dream.

A foolish heart does not fear pain,
for that is where it sleeps.
No, a foolish heart,
fears the end,
it fears the death
of its very own breath.
Where the illusion is broken,
and all that remains
Is a plain human being.
A foolish heart wants to stay foolish
for it’s the most alive its ever been.

Lunar Love 10h

I hope I'm not too
I hope you're not too

12 words I wish I could say to him called jul

Bare feet grounding firmly
Distant whistles of soulmate songs
Your name still playing in the back of my head.

It's been a month.
I would have kissed you by now.
AC 10h

It's twelve in the morning,
these thoughts don't have enough space
It screams for a peaceful life
yet craves for endless ideas
I'm not crazy, I am just aware
That people will leave
when they are tired of you
Believe me,
they can and they will.

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