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Wrap this moment wider into time
Longer evenings would be sublime
To muse over all the fluff
These moments stretched long enough
To cherish and breath the cool night air
And believe I haven't got a care

Time is gone in the blink of an eye
No matter days be long, or days be short
Never enough time for you and I
Or for my mind to wander and transport

Air unempty
Life full
Another addition nearly in bay
Blessed aplenty
The dance of Life, a riveting ballet
Nothing can rise
Beyond the clouds in the skies
As long as we demoralize
Every imaginative spirit that tries

Elle May 21
Nostalgia is
The laughter down the rec
As we poured beer
And did milk shots

Nostalgia is
The camp fires
The boys added hairspray to
And panicked

Nostalgia is
Your arm around my shoulder
Protective and proud
And very nervous

Nostalgia is
The Daisy chains
And gossip of
Who kissed who

Nostalgia is
The innocence of
Running wild in fields
Till the sun came up

Nostalgia is
Our beating hearts
Under the duvet
Hoping your brother didn’t hear

Nostalgia is
Knowing it’s just a memory
No longer to be

Nostalgia is
Looking at old photos
With a half smile
And chest ache
Stuck on your image
All the moments we shared
How I wish it was someone else for which I cared
Good memories had in the past
Upset me cause they went too fast
I'll never know which portion of it was real
Or the number of emotions you swore to feel
I don't ever receive a straight answer from you
Perhaps you yourself never knew
The love reflected in your glacier eyes
More memorable than countless lies
The truth is difficult to forget
And even harder to accept
Do you ever step back and look at your life?
Or the mirror and ask yourself why?
I guess there's no way to know what you're feeling
Layers are endless
I keep peeling
I hesitate
Hoping you'll somehow revert
To the you that didn't make me hurt
It seems that was so very long ago
For some reason my heart won't let you go
Written 11-10-18
My love,
I wish you could visit.
Your smile,
Your laugh,
Is truly exquisite.
And I knew,
From the very start,
That you and I
Can never depart.

As not a million miles,
Can break us apart.
J J Jan 13
One (love triangle)
I wanna be your lover,
I don't wanna be his friend.
Don't make me go home yet,
I haven't figured out what to do with myself

He's better looking but does he deform your toes?
  I doubt it,
Maybe I'm just not much fun to be around, maybe I'm a pain.
I'm my only audience as of late and
I've got codine in my liver, smoke in my nostrils and the taste of your tongue
In my mouth, still lingering...
I've got long ago broken bones that linger too and owe a debt in your name
It's so hard to leave a person behind
O but it's such a sin to stay the same age for any longer than you have to.

her teeth are pissyellow like a passive snowball
you were the gift that kept on taking
and I took every breath in strife, choking on rain to see a face that was asleep and too busy
To answer the door even though she's the one that sent me over.

Alas, I cannot leave behind
a stone that I found arest in it's place.

There is no food left, there is no money there's nothing but memories of securer times
but this you know cannot last;
vagabond in the winter with gloveless hand,
May not die but there'll be pain,
But he was headstuck and
clutching dust he swiped from the surface of pinkbricks back in summer when impersonating a banker,
no matter how hard one tries to hide anything
anyone knows the whole story at a second glance
My pharmacist asked if I was ****** again
I couldn't even answer, I couldn't even talk
It's not a burden, it's just a shame,
just want to be alone where no one reminds of my mistakes that I live with everyday--
I'm just a person I once thought myself more as a young person does,

you made me ascend for a second I couldn't believe it when I saw
   you were cutting me down--
Hang em high forty-guns
   and all of them empty
I waited awake as long as I could for her but she never came
O well
bless you even though you forgot to sneeze

And just so you know

I wasn't *******, I was pleading nicely
I just figured I was worth a few minute's attention, sorry for being wrong.

You were always wrong

You were always wrong

You were always wrong.

(Two ) (honkytonk mania blues/streetket laced with 'tism)

I drag pain behind my ev'ry step, don't you think it's a sin?
Long distance walk left my body feeling hungover
I collapsed at your door and you still won't let me in...
I sat on your stairs and raced the sunrise to get sober...
By the time I gathered my senses I'd already missed the train.
Saw you got your new love, she looks like an uglier version of your sister,
you know I'm no one to judge but *******! She looks just like your sister.
I was aimless in life once, babe, but that was back when I missed ya.

Three ( mankysam+abandoned/abused+ sadsong)
I live on borrowed time
I'm inlove with Mary Hilligoss
Our eyes match in their hauntedness
But they hold lifetimes behind them neither of us could know about

I've got a best friend I like a little and love alot
She OD's on otc tablets just to pass the time
Maybe you know her but I wouldn't like to know why if you did.
When I see her heading my way in the street I nonetheless slip like Tyson on ice.
I find *** repulsive these days but my arms are always open for talking
Just so long as she gives me an hour's notice.
I was inlove with her once, I truly was,
But just because it mattered doesn't mean it should've happened,

This life will strip you to nothingness in time,
The question is a matter of whatever you wish to pose and when, who really cares for why?
An artist only stands to lose it all when they no longer believe they need a muse.

Time brandishes a change too immeasurable to be expected to be noticed
Much less confronted. Broken dishes and screaming confusion across the room broken choruses reprise all too distant and muffled thankfully, just like yesterday.
I was juat a child why do I still want to say that I wasn't scared?
And now the only consistent reliance only shelter of love a door I kept shut hitherto before I couldn't breathe and thus had to let it open
I prefer to be alone more days than not truthfully I know why but I don't mind.

It was new year's eve and I couldn't shake the pains
So I had to ask and wait for a reply; his yes is like gold on the ears
I've walked on blistered feet and bled before,
I've walked on broken feet just to **** their pain and it's worth choking back how ever many tears
Isn't that the way of life mankysam?
up all night just to lay head against the brick wall with my fists at my hips
I havent seen it all but I know I've seen quite enough;
Your exocidal taunt of control you hold back so clearly like you hold open a door,
Like the first time dealer to the winning stack with his head thrown back and the light overhead burning his face clear enough for a blind man to see
I'm not dumb, nor lack the will to confront, I'm just lazy.

Mankysam is the solace,
  he wears above-the-law medallions across the barrels of his motor
salute to bonjour and the glowing colours
  that crowded the place--walls and a floor--
To a scene. So long to it all I'm going somewhere I've never been next year and that's the end of it.
One day will be the last day you and me ever meet mankysam

Today is not that day but I'm gonna make what I get from us last

     atleast for aslong as I can do so

What a joy to live calm lovingly hating everyone as they pass by and feeling no guilt for doing so.

I plan on making things better but I've made no plans yet
I know well enough I'm good enough to do the best I can,
If only for you


My brain has been broke or breaking for years now I think it's just time to accept the damage is never done until no more can be inflicted,

And I swear I saw getting married but I no longer see anyone now
And I know God themself is capable of crisscrossing people who get too comfortable, so I don't seem to settle in anywhere at all.
But when Sammy gives me the call saying that he's near
I get dressed sharp as a knife and smile
so tall now in the mirror, like deserted grass.
Smile and forget all my stupid little matters.
I ain't reading all that!! I'm a footprint in my garden not a footnote in anything, don't get it twisted
Em Dec 2023
I settle on a seat distant from the world and my life
Here I observe the souls of those overcome with strife  
Settling on a bench sheltered with fallen flowers
from the shivers of trees recovering from nighttime terrors
Red plaid shorts damp beneath me
A book sprawled open on my lap watching with pure envy
as my eyes trace a phrase my mind is quickly trapped in
"its the truth even if it didn't happen"
I experience the sun blaze its rays down onto my thighs
Drawing crimson marks with my nails, I analyze
There's a strange sense of comfort in the burning sensation
The fear of not knowing what to expect consumes my self isolation
The unknown lingers in my mind, crimson now engrossed
I can always trust that the sunlight will never stop sizzling sunburnt skin
So instead of cursing the pain, I find it sublime
for it is the most secure I've felt in a long time
rewrite of a previous poem
Amanda Kay Burke Oct 2023
Love is crazy

Long lonely nights
Short stories told back and forth on a landline until the battery on the handset dies

We try forgetting days that haunt us like restless ghosts but they linger like the adhesive left when you peel the sticker off the back of a lighter..
It's the little things that stick with us the most
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