I've excused the abuse,
because by now I'm so used to
being refused
the option to choose
what I gain, what I lose,
or the ways that I'm used.
My body is bruised.
I've pumped myself full of booze.
my hearts beginning to ooze...
I'm so fucking confused.
I'm only ever accused
of the things I cant do,
and I try to defuse
the bomb that you use
but I always run out of time.
This life's a game made to lose.
I really just need to transfuse
all these feelings of feeling used,
and abused, and confused, and targeted as a muse.
But it's like they're all fused
to my fucking broken soul.
my body's constantly shaking,
I'm unable to hold
onto anything worth taking.
"You're unloved because you're cold.".
I'm not trying to push you away...
I swear my heart's made of gold...
And yet, here I am
unmoved, unimproved
still not doing what I was told.
thinking too much can put you in difficult positions, crossroads if you will. Different things make me feel different emotions. Emotions make me feel even more different, more articulate emotions.
My mind put on a disguise
For the first time tonight
That's why
I can't decide to live or die
Without you by my side

I hide behind this mask I made for you
That smile that you give makes the pain go away
So I'll trade this misery if you stay happy
Let's not lie-
To ourselves, we have so much time
To find the truth and make up our mind

I'll take off my disguise
Let you see the real pain behind these eyes
No more lies
Only what lies from now til the end for us
I'll give you my love, lust, hurt, and trust
Please baby
I'll stay faithful-loyal just let me try
I'll become your hero
Your best friend with a shoulder to cry on
Open to me
I'll keep you close so you can rely

And I know
It's scary
And I fear tho
My state of being is like a window
See through me
And look at my honesty

I don't want to hold you back
You're a free spirte
And I know that
You give me freedom
But I know you're going to stay with him
You won't leave my mind, and it's like a dream
I can't wait to awake
And leave this pain
Make no mistake
I don't regret what we made
I just wish
The track I paved
Didn't make bury my own grave
And instead
Gave me the chance to trade
This misery for happiness


I digress    
It could always be worse
What I'm saying is what I've been trying to stall
It's better to be loved than not loved at all

So goodbye  
To you and this disguise
Maybe later in life we'll look back and laugh at
This friends-with-benefits we once had
Probably my longest poem I wrote it like a rap with lots of near rhymes. It is (hopefully) my last poem on how I feel about my FWB saga...
Kit 5d
I've heard that the first and last are those remembered, but neither stays, nor all those in between, the then and now.

We lose first the face then the feeling, like a thing we hold a little too tight, but then suddenly we have no tenderness, no memory of holding, no memory of soft beds.

Just standing in the hallway between here and there, wondering what could we have possibly said to fill that void.

First breaths, the walls echoing soft moans or thunderous wails.
Frozen prision pizza, the last meal of a dying relationship.

Maybe in that space beyond anything we known, perhaps your tiger tails of dash and dust will cross mine, an arcadia light years from now.

Perhaps I will remember your sent, your smile, the arch of your back, or the way your nails dug into my skin as your lips curved to whisper my name
     before black arcs
Scre­aming past planets and memories that have no name to me any more.
However, what truly stays? Even this moment is now
Thinking out loud
There are footsteps
drawn in rainwater
that float on the floor
that was once firm and solid
but now cracks under my every step.
The rain and storm
must have brought him here.
The never improving
weather of his heart.
Did he find what he came for?
How long he must have stood here?
Was it still raining when he left?
Home -
That's where we went on your birthday.
It didn't quite fit though, did it?
Because Home was right in front of me,
and four thousand miles away.

You tried to make it work,
and maybe I had given up,
but now I'm left unfettered,
and floating on til -

Yet home was far away,
and Home had never been closer.

I've been back too long
to miss my home,
but long enough to lose
i don't normally put this many up, but i ended up going through my drafts and decided it was time to air poems from ages ago that i never quite published - better out than in and all that. i also think i have a chronic fear of redacting parts of my life, and i find a strange beauty in painting my happiest moments alongside my mostly deeply shameful. a patchwork quilt of human experience - or maybe just a pretentious, very depressed teenager with no other outlet that is safe
Nayana Nair Mar 14
I sat on the stairs
long after they stopped shouting.
As the shout and anger
made room for themselves
in our lives.
As muted cries
became muted sighs.
I would look at the sky
and see no stars,
but only the tears
that pooled my eyes.
For long, a portion of time
got stuck in my heart
to remind of how lonely a child could be
in spite of having all.
TeeCrush Mar 8
It’s a shame you had to go
and I never let my feelings show.
I wish that you could’ve stayed
but I know it wasn’t for you to say.
Still I will love you,
even if it’s from another world
three hundred miles away.
I really liked a girl & then she moved away for college.
TeeCrush Mar 8
After I made my declaration of infatuation              
You sent me to damnation
A place that eats at you with the isolation
I begged my friends for some kind of salvation
But they couldn't help me until I let go of my negation                                  
Still I didn't let go because I loved the sensation
You filled me with some kind of sedation
And I couldn’t resist the temptation

You’re just so beautiful
You’re perfect
And you mean the world to me

You’re worth every amount of my adoration
And I still think you deserve more admiration
You filled me inspiration
And being with you became my aspiration
And so I declared my infatuation
But due to some kind of complication
A mix up in the constellations
Our cells had some kind of mutation
And now it led me to my ultimate devastation:
Our complete separation

And it turned out, that to you,

I was nothing more than an agitation
We were no longer able to hold a conversation
Because your every sentence became an exclamation
And I couldn’t see the problem, I needed an explanation
I need to know why you think I’m some kind of abomination
Because now you treat me with immense brutalization
And believe me it’s no different than decapitation

And god it hurt so bad, so very bad
But I survived

My heart managed to live through its annihilation
And even after that, I hold you in glorification
They think I'm a fool, but I get over the humiliation
And sometimes I have all these hallucinations
Where I think I’m holding your hand and can feel your blood’s circulation
But then I realize it’s just an aberration
And I constantly find myself in frustration
Because you were my only source of motivation
I only woke up in morning to relieve myself of deprivation
And you wouldn’t understand my appreciation
For the happiness you gave me at our unification

All because I loved you
And maybe too much
I just wish I could go back in time
And make things right

Through some kind of alteration
Prevent you from having any kind of misinterpretation
Save myself from the isolation
The sleepless nights and exasperation
Taking helpless actions out of desperation

And every time I came to your perfection
You slapped my face with rejection

It’s like you never put any thought into our combination
I can relieve of your desolation
You’d never have to face your heart’s obliteration

I'd never stop loving you
You’d always have my full attention
You’ll never face rejection
And you’d never see your own imperfections

And all you’d have to do
Is come to this abominable creation,
And accept his declaration of infatuation
I wrote this one during my junior year of high school. It sounds better when you read it aloud and a bit fast. When I read it in one of my classes, my friends thought it was so good they cheered me on. The girl I wrote it about was also there & she was pissed. lol

Obviously, the "-ation" repetition or rhyme is intentional.
Raven Mar 7
I curl your jacket around my face,
In an attempt to somehow bring you closer to me.
The colored threads interwoven,
Black and white never looked so good.
I long for your arms around me,
Your voice within me,
Your breath on me,
Skin on skin.
Yet here I am, stuck
Inside your jacket,
Feeling empty
Without your love.
Long distance sucks.
Tiana Marie Mar 1
If tomorrow was my last
I'd do nothing.
I wouldn't skydive
I wouldn't travel
I wouldn't do everything
I've ever wanted to do.

If tomorrow was my last
I'd do as always.
I'd get up
I'd read my bible
I'd go to school
and have an average day.

If tomorrow was my last
I'd act as normal.
I'd smile to others
I'd say "hello"
I'd do my best
as I try every day.

If tomorrow was my last
I'd tell no one.
I wouldn't shout it
I wouldn't scream it
I wouldn't sing it
from every single rooftop.

If tomorrow was my last
I'd never know it.
That's why my usual
day to day consists
of all things I love
the very most.

If tomorrow were my very last
what I do today would be enough.
It would make me smile
It would make me laugh
It would make me happy
Because I have learned always
to be content in the ordinary.
Next page