It’s only a childish dream. If you give up on it. Giving up is a childish thing.

                       With love,
                             Anonymous
Another, another.

These words bite and nip
at my heels.
You can't possibly know how this feels,
but you look at me
still with those disgraced eyes,
which you don't even try to disguise.

You say it's all self-control,
as though that'll assuage my soul.
I worked my whole life to be good,
and it left me empty.

Giving, giving, giving
left me with nothing.
I'm an empty shell,
like Humpty Dumpty.
Someone cracked me open
and fried the yolk within.

So, when you ask me,
"Want another one?"

I'll say yes, god damn it.
Sadists, aren’t we all… abusing that for which we fall…
The way that I’m obsessed… with the fabric of your dress
Although it doesn’t feel as good… as tender skin beneath it would
So it deserves the claws… and lacerated ribbons’ flow…
Of all the fingers, it’s the thumb… that sees the broadest, like the sun
Runs in circles on those knees… the sweet of you I love to read
Yet passion thrives on sacrifice… with aftermaths of melting ice
To treat the paintings on your skin… which lust, in trance, would blindly leave
Like every coin, there are two sides… and truth is tasting both in life…
The things that we adore… our hunger paints in gore
And now you’re in the palms… their lips brush off the calm…
The sinking of the teeth… the flavor underneath...
With the outset of your child
to a brisk, cold wind unfettered.
How do you stare starving virgins
in the face as they float untethered.

Lies are a currency, counterfeit only to etiquette,
and emotion, and love. We lie,
locked eye within eye, in ways
to boost pride.

When vainglory preaches to you from a
styrofoam podium.
How do you recollect your bargains
Made in dead of night,
blanket to your neck.
Lies can sate those fever dreams
crept upon you from opium.

Does love mean love if it is said with force?
Faint heart never won fair lady.
Without Victorian hysteria;
Our corsets are not so tight
We lack the need for chaise longue
May we lack the need for, indeed nor,
the lie?
CC 6d
There is a string of things hung with ideas as clothes pins
They take off the ideas and the string can't hold the thing
Memories are strands that if you pull it will never stop unwinding
The common person sees something in the little he won in life
The rest are rather useful than pleasant
Nobody received flowers or fame
If you could see now I'm dying to drown in flames
The love I've been placed through has to be the stuff of myth
It seems to hold back until the graze
The way it holds by taking
The way you hold by cradling
There's so much in me that you already know
I have a bit of wrinkles and the acne scars too
The whole of society sees me as living the dream
But the parts of me that people think are hidden are on the internet
See what the world knows
I should be aware of all the rules I've broken to be here
Then no purposeful ignorance can be said of me
There has to be someone who can point out the crumb on my lower lip
Rather than speak without the relevance of politeness
There's something about the way you hold me
That says you're trying me on
There is no transaction taking place
Treasure is most found on the map of my slow heartbeat
The calm before the storm siphons its way into my blood cells
Making me believe in the little I know as well
You have to be well read to read someone else's biography
You have no language if you only understand yourself
Take a bit off
Ashley Kane Apr 3
I Wish I could love myself
Or
See my own beauty that others apparently see

I wish I could feel my body’s worth and potential
I wish I could live to be the best me

To fill myself with nutrition and goodness
To have wild ambition and love free

To fight for my dreams and feel full and high on life
Why can’t I do this for me ?

Why do I poison myself with sugar and gin
Why don’t I get up and move

Almost brain dead, catatonic
old and to broken
Just a big disappointment to me

My own expectations have fallen and gone
My self respect doesn’t exist

I exhaust from self reproaching jokes and I don’t expect anything of me

(C) Ashley Kane Fb
she gave and gave till her heart faded away
she gave her soul
she gave her mind
she gave her sanity
she gave and gave and yet you couldn't sacrifice a breath for her
I wield an aura I didn't feel,
I must have unknowingly
repressed it,
Until you felt it and
addressed it,
I yield it to you,
So the world can feel how you'll
express it.
Do you remember,

right now the wind is a moment.

What it was like the first time,

it is tickling nerves and lying to my body

You felt the sun on your skin?

sometimes it trickles over you like water

It feels different than it does now,

sings to your cells as the molecules embrace each other

Like you were only ever able to feel it once.

lingering when the breeze stops and reminding you what it'll be like when the wind starts to blow again

I remember.

but it never does.
What wouldn't I give to be with them?
I'd give them anything they desired,
No matter how insane or expensive.
I'd give all my other dreams and aspirations,
For they are more valuable.
I'd give them my body, my mind, my soul,
Any part of me they wanted.
But they don't want me,
So I'm stuck with all these things instead.
What will I give to be with them?
I can't give them anything.
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