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When I pronounce my fears
or when I shed silent tears?
When I float in my passion
or when I calaculate my every action?
When I naysay to unease
or when I offer my every piece?
When I dance like no one's there
or when I be conscious of my way?
When I'm that benevolent fighter
or when I'm the aloof spectator?
So tell me, when am I my better version?
When would you think of me as a better version?
It might be said:

Every time I walked past you
I saw a blur of emptiness near
The clear space I dared not glance to,
Since the emptiness filled my heart
With nerves, exhaust and a tear.
Walking past someone particular could change the way you feel for just a second.
I have no words to write
     Just tears to cry
I have been alone
      I forgot what it feels like to be around people.
26/5. Pain.
their scars protrude like mountain ranges
each stretch of fibrotic skin
bears their soul for all to see

but how very few notice
and how fewer reach out
IvS 1d
Silver blood
Running untashed and untammed trough the odds
Maybe you reconsider like you did before
My heart still bleed, I still need...
Sometimes I tasted the tears,  worries and fears
Searching for a reason to live ...
Just take a breath, I'm still a human underneath
Just can't fit...what I did?
Tell me this, please.  
A prophecy to fulfill or a destination to achieve
i can't solve this breach.
Part of a writing challenge
I wish you'd disappear
Don't you ever say
I loved you with all my heart
You'd be wrong
If you thought I never loved you
You're right
When you say I want you back
It's like a knife in my gut
I've been told I should hate you
And I've taken that advice
But some people say to chase you
It makes me sick
To watch you walk away alone
Was the greatest thing in the world
Our relationship
Was terrible, and
Leaving you
Incredibly smart
Although I don't think I am

-read it from bottom to top
You can hate me now...
Too many nights I have lay here crying,
the tears pour down
and I can't tell if they're lying.
I feel an emptiness deep inside
knowing I should be doing alright.

There are days where I paint on a smile,
make it through the day
by laughing a little louder,
I know if I ever dare stop for a while
I will feel it in full force and I'll breakdown.

Too much noise filling my head all the time,
I try to scream
but it's buried deep inside.
I fear if I don't speak up soon
I'll be lost to the war no-one else can see.
Just like rain drops
my tears fall
watering seeds sown
from my past.
Before too long
they will flower
into wonderful opportunities,
stunning all those who see,
never knowing the damaged roots that lay underneath.
For you see the colourful bloom reached for the sun,
Illuminating the world in a sea of colour,
ready to take on life's next adventure.
Just like rain drops
my tears fell
watering seeds sown
ready to bloom into wonderment.
The soft sound of your beating heart
can soften even the biggest storms inside me.
The gentle sound of your voice
lulls me into a sense of hope and wonder
that maybe this world isn't always so bad.

The warm embrace of a friends arms
bringing back to a sense of reality
where I am not lost to the monsters inside my head,
but am someone much stronger,
able to defend the broken parts.

The serenity of peaceful silence,
where you are just there and nothing more
compliments my sullen tears,
building up a strength I never knew I had
Until I will no-longer fall prey to the demons of the past.
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