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CryBaby Di Nov 30
Sometimes you just have to accept the things that you cannot change.
Like, you can compulsive lie your *** off but it still cannot change what is true.
They say that the truth is the
hardest pill to swallow,
so instead I crush it up and I snort it.  
Even if there were things that I could change I fear I'll just make it even worse,
so I mission abort ****.
I lack the ability to actually change me,
and my courage is cowardly.
I'm hopeless, but I really do hope
that things will hurt less.
I'm useless, but I don't think that
I'll ever use less.

If not this, then it would be that.
It's all relative Nonsense where overall
you were just another substance.
But who am I to deprive misery of
its love for company,
honestly how could I possibly
maintain stability and be granted
any serenity, when all that is
surrounding me and inside of me is constant insanity ?..

Yeah, it's called Drug Abuse,
but is the term "Drug Abuse"
and the overall meaning behind it
really that simple ?..
In which being limited to the technical bottom line meaning and stating that by doing drugs you are abusing those drugs.
Where in other words the users
are apparently the abusers of the drugs that they use,
but isn't it possible that the drugs
actually abuse us too ?..
CryBaby Di Nov 29
The day will come that you find yourself stepping in that big unavoidable pile of **** that is completely made of the huge mess that you yourself have made.
I know when you finally do that it will haunt your dark black soul forever.
So keep flushing your meds down the toilet I guess you're right,
you don't need them.
You are someone who can't
possibly be saved,
because you don't want to be saved.

You can't turn back the hands of time,
or take back the hands in which you laid upon me to harm and cause me pain.
It's far too late.
You can't uncross the ultimate line in which you crossed with me.
Point those filthy fingers of yours towards the mirror right back at your own reflection when you're searching for someone
to blame, you've chosen your own
twisted fate.

I'll never be your's again baby girl.
Not to wrap your arms around to hold,
not to catch you all the times you fall,
not to talk you off the ledge that you so dangerously dance with death upon.
I will never again be any part of your ****** up world.

My shoulder will never again be the shoulder that bears all of your fallen
salty bitter tears.
Listening to all of your depicted fears and each and every one of your own self made problems will never again be either of my ears.

I do hope that there is some sort of help you one day find.
I just won't be the one who's there for you when everyone else leaves you behind.

I do hope that you find a way to keep your head above the waves and remain afloat.
I just won't be the one who jumps in to save you when your drowning and
pull you up onto my life boat.

I really do hope that one of the many days you are feeling helpless that you somehow find the strength to not resort to picking up a razor, pressing it against your skin  and making yourself bleed.
Because seriously I'm sorry but,
I won't be the one who's there to
interfere or to bandage up your self inflicted wounds.
Because I won't be there ever again,
so not even in your time of need.

I so badly do hope that you one day find the type of love that you need to find
within yourself.
I just won't be there to love you anymore myself.
Touch my body
Writing’s my feel
Take a good look
Close, and then seal

I just want
To not ***** up
Give me a pen
Achievements, yep

Touch my soul
Writing feels good
Pen and paper
Nothing else could

People say
I should get a life
Writing is it
No need for a wife

Writing this poem
Anytime that I want
I can do this
All day or all night

Touch my heart
Writing is sharp
Sharper than a knife
Man, words cut hard

Actions speak
Louder than words
But if you write a letter
Those actions are words

Touch my life
Writing you have
I feel good
Ay, thanks for that

I was down
But now I’m up
I feel like I could smile
****, I’ma take a trip

Find a pet or
I don’t know
Just as long as I’m writing
My life will grow

Touch my body
Writing’s my feel
Take a good look
Close, and then seal
sometimes i feel like giving up on writing
feel like throwing this screen into a canyon
but then i remember all the memories stored
all those late nights i stayed up
either crying or restless or just confused
this world would have nothing left of me
so maybe ill keep some of these words
wont throw them all away
but eventually ill get tired of this game
the game i play with myself
how i lie and cheat and fold my cards
raising the stakes, they say
sometime before i felt like giving up on you
and i should have
but all you left me with is a storage
of feelings and memories youll never know
oh orpheus descend thou
next to me about you next about you
again with me about you again with me
i feel your hand your look

look it tears it tears on my
before my eyes this joy is sadness
this all events that happened with me
for these endless wandering years

o orpheus do not leave me stay with me
be with me i don't want to forget you
I already forgot myself you are the only torch
which will revive me which will give me a memory

07.12.18
Classy 3d
Day after day,
Month after month,
Year after year,

The ice in Antartica,
will melt into water.
And the tension between us,
will vanish onto the skies.

It's just a matter of time.
Should I feel mad,
And blame myself,
All in my head,
But it's heartfelt.

Should I feel sad,
And blame the girl,
That once had,
Rocked my world.

Should I feel,
Or go numb,
So no meals,
And don't come,
Down to kneel,
And steal,
My love,
Through my lips,
And then rid of,
Our sessions,
Of intimacy,
Like indecently,
Teaching a lesson,
That I'm learning,
But It's unclear,
It's burning,
Through disgust and fear,
I trust,
My friendly peer,
To do the right thing,
And continue to bring,
The trifling sting,
Of love.
Ugh... emotions are ******...
Where am I going?
I want to see it all
The four corners
The heart of the motherland

What is missing?
The beat to my heart
A kindred light
Hand in hand

Will, I ever witness a periwinkle sky?
Near the border of Shanghai
Certify our pleasure
Flying high together

By Axton Rupp
Em 4d
I hear
And I can feel
The sleepy beat of drums
The deep growl of the bass
The music that somehow reminds me of liquid.
Carelessly flowing,
bouncing from note to note
and beat to beat
In a strong way
yet gentle.

A ****** tune
that sounds so magnificent
Is the purest form of contradiction.
ever hear a song so mmmHHMM??
i have :)
wording is weird because im a ******* thanks
Instincts shrink
when love is on the table
for instincts are for survival
And love is for a dying
in the grandest ritual possible
And although as my gut tells me
Warns me to be on my guard
Cautioning, my brain is mush
And so is my own heart -
Dampen my instincts then,
Love, have me be ******,
Take all of my very existence,
Sacrificing survival on insistence.
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