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You used to have flowers
For words when you spoke.

Tiny petals of sweet smell
That patterned about
Within the air
And settled in my ears.

And they stayed this way for so long
Until something came
And all the flowers were gone.

The petals withered
And hardened like rock
And made me feel numb,
But pain
When they were stopped.
Lack confidence all my life
till meeting my girl my wife this girl came to be, for I had known her from her school girl
days
But fate showed It's hand at the time together we not to be so she married a guy although she loved him he didn't love her, he used her and made her
unwell
Then he had affairs for he had no respect for her eventually after making her so sick he then divorced her but despite her illness, she won rights to keep her  
kids
It was years after this I finally met her again fell love with her from that day on, I never looked
back for I loved my sweetheart
Helen
Now matter how ill you can still fight It through and come out a much stronger person
rebecca Dec 11
What is wrong with me?
Am I just not worthy?
Because who determines who deserves to be happy?
Who decided to **** us to be eternally unhappy?
Why is it me?

How is it fair?
I've been drowning all my life and I just now got a breath of fresh air
Does no one even care?

When will this stop?
When can I just relax and not dream of jumping off the top?
It would be so easy, letting myself drop
...
The truth is, nothing is wrong with me
I am worthy
I deserve to be happy
No one can explain why it's me, and no, it's not fair
But people really do care
Someday this will all stop
and I'll just remember when I wished for that deadly drop.
I haven't written in a long time.

I'm currently going through a really hard time with my depression. I would appreciate the prayers and the love <3
Max Dec 8
If I stayed,
Would it be the same
As when I ran?
If I gave up,
Where would I be?
If I love,
Will it last?

I feel numb,
Everytime I doubt myself.

But what's the use of all these
Questions?
I don't know the answer.
But
what if?!
"What if" is the question I ask myself.
What if somebody reads this and hates it?
I wouldn't know the answer.
I just ask myself too many questions!
eF Dec 8
I wish that I could go back,
Erase the pain I felt.
Everyday seems like a mission,
With the cards that I’ve been dealt.
We all live in pain baby,
Just admit it for yourself.
Despite my current attitude,
That’s hanging on the shelf.
Um yeah.
Hi.

A lively debate
that inside I create
A seemingly
simple state
But this state
of affairs
Is like a ****** affair
The details
I wish not to share
Please,
don’t stare
For inside
I’m scared
Am I prepared?
Do I have
the ***** to do
what I really care?
Or am I going
to stay on this ship
of self-despair
Where
I can scream
my lungs ******
into the air
But does anyone care?
Do I even f@cking care??

Maybe a life spared
but spare me the
retched bullsh@t

of self-pity
I’m self-giving
It wreaks up the air
It’s noxious scent
is not one I care
to ever encounter
or fair

Let’s “clear the air”
and take on
what I want
from now on
No longer a ****
who is living the tired
joke
of some pathetic
love song


No, THIS
is my “Swan Song”
Where I belong
This sh@t is ON!

Climbing the mountain strong
Bellowing a chant
a song
That’s been so deep within
for so long
It can only come out
Right
Because “wrong”
does not belong
This virus
is airborne


No longer forlorn
All the darkness
is gone
You have been
forewarned
Are you ready?
Because it’s coming
Sounding the horn
Sacrificed
the firstborn
The “storm”
Once icy and cold
Now simmering warm
Going to bubble into
volcanic ash scorned
This Oath
hath been sworn
Tattered and torn
**** cloth
all that is worn

But forward my path
What’s behind me
My ***
The past
Worn out,
decayed,
and shriveling trash

All that
is gone
as I head
towards the dawn
Through the darkness
I’ve trekked
The Sun rises ahead
And with it
My song

My Swan Song
I am reborn
withered and worn
But still strong
I belong
I am one
with the Universe

The path before me
is brightly lit
with happiness and joy
No more patheticness
All the grit
and the spit
Broken teeth
All that sh@t
It all meant something
It was THIS

Every bruise
Every brake
All the “wrongs”
and “mistakes”

Are what it takes
You can call it fate
or simply short of fatal
but since
neonatal
through this day till
Every day
I thankfully say
“Thank you”
for showing me the way
Because now I have
A love that stays
A true love
One that can’t
get away
Because I value Me
One ‘hopes’ or ‘prays’
But like a house
Each brick is laid
Onto the next
Foundation made
A sturdy house
Can’t blow away
Hard work put in
Made it this way
The same for me
The price I paid
But end result
A saving grace
Written: December 6, 2018

All rights reserved.
It hurts so much to lose someone
Hot, sharpen knife stabs you right to chest
It freezes your muscles, burns your breath
Alone, paralyzed, scared.

You don't eat for days, don't sleep for a while
You fade away like a ghost without flame
Pieces of your broken heart turned into ash
And left empty hole without any hope.

What was the thing that kept you alive?
Nothing stays the same, everything changes
People leave you, the world, things are temporary like the rainbow after rain.

You are here just for the most painful second
And then you will be gone too
When you can't move nor breath, tears are falling from your eyes, your soul is tearing apart, you're looking right to the eyes of devil.

His smile promises lovely end
For the moment it's the best idea
You close your eyes, whisper weak request
As your body falls apart, lying on the ground.

It hurts so much to lose everything
Breaks you more and more, day after day
You are left empty, with knowing...

... That you will never be good enough.
#darkness #friends #lies #lost #loneliness #pain #tears
Bryce Dec 5
I, naive

I believed that the break in the clouds
Was the end of rain

Thought those rays of sun weren't burning

I was lying
Myself in the grass,
Asking if the tulip chutes in Anatolia
Were the same sinking green I feel now

Where were we?
Love for a thousand spaces and bottling them into skins
Wanted to touch and know deeply all beautiful things

No you're not allowed, they don't want to let you in
That way, it's a distant place and means too much to understand
The biological and irrational
Crazed, sweeps the beautiful souls above and into space-- like milky foam upon the waves

When I return home from excursions
I will be Ipanema
The soft locale, unabashed and known to no soul
Except empty elevators--

The lowly philosopher-king

Maybe then you'll think highly of me
Through the mixed feelings
Unable to handle
Straight through the socket
Ring of fire
Then and only then will you realize
That real life

Is more than just a zone or some local
Brewery on a Friday night

And every other Friday night

Ever thereafter--
You'll unlock the box of atomic intention
And listen deeply to her on the station
"Sade and Other Like Hits"

Slowed down for full potential

Letting your cochlea ****** themselves off to the tune of the universe
And the sound of air moving indiscriminately
Will give you
All this


Somewhere
almost fractal, imbibed
Decimated repetitively
There is a fragment of my voice,
Calling

"Love, how much I'd love to be. "
?
?
?
?
?
?
Genre: Reflecive Art
Theme: On Closed Eyes, Beyond Poetry

6 Pathfinder Questions:

1) Are you sure?
2) Where are you going?
3) Does the Sun get warmer there?
4) Does your wishes get closer?
5) Will you be happy?
6) Will you be in peace?

Even if a single answer is doubtful, stop where you are. Face the Sun, reconfirm the path and keep moving towards the goal. It’s never too late to follow the right direction.
Despair Dec 4
I found someone,
they make me whole,
but one thing,
well, maybe more than one thing,
those things are,
I am insane,
weird,
****,
hopeless.
But she convinced me other,
or she thought
but I still plan things that people will say I am crazy for planning,
but,
She still loves me
and that is what love is.
The ability to hold someone's hand when they are not perfect or are having a bad day, or maybe just crazy.
That is what love is the ability to stand by someone no matter what.
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