My poetry is open and bare on the examination table
While my brain falls into place in the exsanguination cradle
Pieces fit together like a monster from the old world fables
Set up to disassociate the Kanes from the Ables

We're all meant to die
There's no harm in asking why
Self harm, drugs left in the arms, premeditation, self incrimination
It won't matter when we're stitched up in a Y

Theres hidden meanings in every line
A chance to put aside all the woes and keep feelings burning inside
When things are on the decline
I can write down facts and theories
Like self investigation as to why I'm feeling weary
No Overbearing intoxication here just a rough cut heart of ice melting due to overheating and slipping liquidation

lilly 2d

look up.

watch
as the watercolours bleed into the canvas of the sky
see the freckles of stars and constellations
bask
in the momentary warmth that you feel, comfort; safety

it's beautiful isn't it?

see the white clouds
bright and ever so superior
stretching across the horizon
carelessly
the area that belonged to the dark seas
but no longer
ever since the clouds claimed their territory
smiling, careless clouds

believe
that the world we live in is like sugar
sweet and pleasant and utterly pure

pretend
that the sugar isn't crumbling
bit by bit
piece by piece
falling apart
dissolving into sticky, empty nothingness

look down.

see the cracks on the ground
tell yourself that they're only on the surface
shallow
that they can be easily mended with cement

(they can't.)

and rehearse
rehearse the parts you're meant to play
a good sibling, child, friend

person

act as though you put others before yourself
as though you think their happiness is more important than yours
as though you'd sacrifice your life
for them

because you're selfless, aren't you?

(you aren't.)

perform
the rehearsed banter and
the perfected smiles and
the expertly timed eye roll -- cock your head to the left squinted eyes
glare for half a second before rolling them

and watch the stars dissipate
disappear
as the haze clouds over it
from all the pollution
problems that we promised we would fix
and the sky soon settles into an eternal darkness
dry acrylic

look straight ahead.

see eyes and noses and lips
some familiar and others not
see sincere smiles and forced smiles
see the world we live in
beautiful and wretched and human

did we make it this way
or did it make us this way

see the people around us
the eyes and noses and lips that form faces
the sincere smiles and forced smiles that form images
we're all beautiful and wretched and human

and there's absolutely everything and nothing we can do to change anything

look up or down or straight ahead or whatever
just look

(maybe that's all we can really do)

just look
and see
and breathe

(breathe.)

and be

be beautiful and wretched and human
be everything you've ever wanted to be
or everything you've never wanted to be

it's okay to be okay
it's okay to not be okay
it's okay to just be

it's okay.

just look
and see
and breathe.

Beginning of the end.
Seems crazy to think about the days when
You couldn't get enough of being my boyfriend.
A million text messages everyday you'd send,
Now I'm lucky if I get ten.
What are we doing? Are we playing pretend?
Used to get a "Good morning, beautiful" when I'd wake and
Everything's divided between now and then.

I've got my bags packed but I can't seem to leave.
I try so hard not to doubt because I want to believe
Because I don't want you to go away but we've
Become something I never dreamed.
Can I play naive?
But when I feel you pulling away it's hard to breathe.
This doesn't make sense, let's think a minute please...

These days, I listen to break up songs,
But I keep a happy beat so I can sing along.
It's not all sad, sometimes we talk for so long,
And it feels like we're playing ping-pong,
Was I going crazy for thinking it was wrong?
But then I watch the clock, and I realize you're gone.

So I find my own thing to do,
Seems like you only want me when I pull away too.
Right now your edges are bleeding blue,
So I wait for you to change your hue.
As I'm lacing up my walking shoes,
Where are you?
You got a new tattoo,
I guess now you're disappearing into Blink 182.
One day I'll see you clear in my rear-view,
But today I hold on because it's hard to say adieu.

7/16/17- Steps to fixing us

She can't be that blind,
She must choose not to see.
You take advantage of the kind
In women like us three.

But it doesn't matter,
Anymore, a little or a lot,
Let your evil all round scatter,
My problem, it is not.

Arcassin B Jul 16

By Arcassin Burnham

Mister Mr. Spare me the cheap talk and all
Of the schemes,
I'm not amused by your dilemma of sneaking
Behind scenes,
I'm just waiting for all of these nightmares to
Turn into dreams,
The problems will occur wherever you are by
All means,

I'm glad to be a teacher,
I hate to be learning,
While gravity is holding us down,
Inside we're burning,
So I lock myself in a freezer to prevent being grilled,
Didn't ask to hear about your gossip,
Please save me the grief.
I'm glad to be a teacher,

Mister Mr.

©abpoetry2017
https://arcassin.blogspot.com/2017/07/mr-mister.html

They
found
his car
outside
the bar
figured he
couldn't
crawl
too far

so they
sat down
for a brew
or two
thinking
this is
just what
he would
do

gmw '17

Sending trouble to find trouble.
Carter Jul 10

Together we swim,
Skin touching satin skin
Fingertips grazing knees and thighs
As my engine of a heart enters overdrive with glee
Her breath keeps me alive against the strain of our instincts

My breath catches and my body contorts
Until I am suddenly entangled with a hooded figure instead
His heavy limbs pin me against the wall and his hands greedily search through my home
I realize I am being robbed but
He's not a stranger

His lips warm my neck and I choke on his telltale cologne as his hands hastily break through the deepest closets that house my innocence, my treasures, and no matter how sternly I refuse, he shoves through the doors until he finds exactly what he wants

I thought it was hidden

I thought it was safe

I thought it was mine

He smiles and lavishly thrusts his hands into my special box
Thanking me,
Between heavy breaths,
for giving him access to my prized possession,
To my heart

But
when he asked for a taste
I refused. But
He insisted and
Kept pushing
Pushing
And pushing against the wooden door until it splintered and snapped and he could enter with
Or without
My permission

Once inside, I had no choice
but to let him manhandle my possessions,
I can never again close that door that He broke
To fulfill his needs and
To satisfy his craving

Although he leaves with satisfaction dripping from his palms
I know it won't last forever
His hunger will return again,
Stronger.

And no matter how much I invest in new locks
and thicker blockades around my special space
He has already stolen a taste of the core of my emotions that
That door served to protect

He will return again,
with a sense of entitlement to my insides
And I won't fight back

Because his sweaty palms and greasy skin have already leaked onto the pieces
Even those he had not yet touched
My pure and personal secret now leaves nothing but bitterness on my tongue and stains on my body

And now,
I still feel his hands, not hers
I hear his breathing

Feel his weight pressing against me,
His hands destroying my body

I become hysterical and
Tears burn my eyes and stain our sheets.

I see the panic in her eyes

She doesn't know

She doesn't know I'm dirty and broken

She doesn't know why

And I can't
stop
crying

She's scared.

I would be too

But I'm dead inside.

She can't touch me because he did
Noné Billi Jul 10

I have a fear
A sense of doubt,
And I never wish
To let it out.

But in mind,
It haunts me so
Slithers about
In the darker groves.
And at moments
When I'm alone,
It sneaks on me
With its nasty hold.

It coils around my neck,
It scales the span
Of my body,
Pulling on me
Making me pale
And my body wobble.
Looks me in the eyes,
Hurts me till I cry,
I beg for relief
But I find myself
Escaping to a morbid sleep.

And before I die,
It lets me go.
Grins at me
And I know.
If I bury these things
Again it will show.

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