A test, another thing to best
A new you for another day
Sometimes you can't survive the burden
That lay on top of you,
Your shoulders were never weak
Until you saw the path that lay ahead
The mystery of life brings you down
How does someone stay content in the midst of such chaos?
Building yourself up every day
Only to be broken down again
Overcoming your shallow misdemeanours
One day at a time
If there's no bliss at the end, is it even worth it?
How hard must one grovel?
Maybe you've never seen the real thing
Or maybe this is that path you were too afraid to travel
If overcoming is the end result, why must I even bother?
Maybe all I want
Is to persevere,
But towards a tangential goal
The sight of which still seems near
It is too much, I often lose my self
In trying to build houses
Over the grounds of disdain and despair
Maybe all I want
Is to be happy right now
Not thinking too much
About the load that I have to carry
On the road with my dusty soul
I often wonder about could have been
Had I been normal
Not letting my mind into overdrive
Running wild with thoughts asynchronous
Maybe then I could have finally put on a savoury smile
Can't always be proving myself,
I should instead focus on growing myself
To deal with things I've never dealt with before
Tackle all of the unknowns
Trying to hold on to my peace of mind
Never letting go of the grind
What if I lose myself in the process?
What has been the purpose of all this struggle?
Isn't it to find solace in all things uncertain?
Or just make peace with what you had always known
Still not fit for the task, I have got to grow
I have got to rise up, be mature
Get real about the situation
Can't escape anymore
Is it a stronger sense of urgency
Or a deeper sense of complacency
That keeps you dwelling
Upon how things will eventually turn out
Maybe you've always known
Even with the work, you'll probably still end up ashore
In a sea of ghosts
Never once been able to set sail for the treasure island
Don't let the end result bother you, they say
Well, that's the novel approach
You've always been told to stay awake
Never resting, never sleeping
For you might miss your chance
With your ever fading vision
It's getting rather harder to hang on
To the thought of you ever climbing up the skies
Bringing upon a tear down your eye
Regardless, the wheels of change are in motion
You have to play your part,
Even if you feel like a deserted hut on a mountain hill
Like a cactus plant on a long country road
It feels like the strangest thing,
But now you have a deeper understanding
You have to put it all on the line again
Let your purpose be all-consuming
For this time if you fall short,
You fail with a purpose
Of trying to never let go of it
For now, you are closer than where you were before
If I let my sins do the talking,
You'll only hear them say
Pleasure is all you were seeking
Pain is what lead you to stay
Knowing this story of right and wrong,
Of pleasure and pain, of black and white,
Has got no end
Things so often knock you off your spirits
Bring you down
For it was never binary,
But rather multifaceted
It was all the colours that you had found
Maybe that's the only lesson here
Altering your thought process
To walk with different shoes at different times
Always staying on top of each phase
Winning is rather inconsequential now
In the longer run,
you'd have enjoyed your date with destiny
With all its ups and downs
All the times you'd have previously frowned
Now you'll smile in the same place
For now, you learnt how to let go
Of that two-faced coin
Holding on to the idea that experiencing a multitude of emotions
Is still a better result than waiting for the ultimate win
Feeling all the colours of the rainbow after a heavy rain