Distorted memories, But all were just tragedies. My mind was just full of fantasies, That didn't happen all through these years. Happiness that turned to tears; Hope that turned to fears; I wish I never woke up from this dream, And just stayed there forever until it dims.
Free of fears, free of tears I wander freely And happily rejoice with materialistic things Gleefully denying the fact That death doesn't rejoice with me
"The one who loves his world harms his Hereafter, and the one who loves his Hereafter harms his world. Hence you prefer the immortal (Hereafter) to the mortal (world). " - (Musnad Imam Ahmad, vol. 7, pp. 165, Hadees 19717)
Bugaboo accompanies me Eversince I lost her A volley of questions I have lost the 'key' Bugaboo accompanies me To the street I lost the key There is darkness everywhere Except only a lamp post I could see Near to where Bugaboo is with me I approach the lamp post Search for the 'key' Bugaboo laughs What are you doing Street extends from east to west You search for the 'key' In small vicinity of lamp post Listen Bugaboo Hope is here for light is here Groping in the dark I shall be no where You have given me fears and fears In the light they disappear
And we sit on the porch steps our bare feet rest on cold cement the space between memories and contentment starts to occupy your lungs we watch the distant rain, still too premature yet you, in fear of the future run inside.
I used to have this night terror... a man or multiple chasing me trying to kidnap me I watched him kidnap so many others
he reached out to me this scary man with a disguise of female features... I never understood where and what created this fear of abuse at such a young age I ran from more men in my dreams than I did in real life... I never thought of being abused... I have no memories. Was i??? did something happen to me? did something happen to my mother??? am i seeing a ghosts story??? am I hearing the tales of these kids?? is this a past life??
these are all the questions I would ask... as time goes on... the night terrors turn to day dreams i witness myself being choked... i can feel someone watching me i lose track of time watching some take their time on me... i cause myself tears...
i create all these fears in my head i can see them so clear these fears i could never control and i never once understood
never the memories of someone i knew all strangers created from a memory i almost knew
I let out a blood curdle scream Hoping my parents can come help me I was trapped within a paralyzed body Stuck between a purgatory state of sleep and reality.
Shadowy silhouettes appeared then were out of sight, In the corners of my forest green eyes, The sound of their hushed footsteps were left behind Leaving me frightened out of my mind. I was prepared to be hurt by the creatures That lurked my bedroom at night.
Mom frantically told the doctor who said it was sleep paralysis, The good news is that I would be alright. There’s nothing they can do, I’m stuck feeling the fear that comes to me Whenever the sleep paralysis decides to strike.
No one can help me, I have to live through getting stuck in a limp body Welcoming the scary creatures that come by, Having an episode is one of the scariest things That I’ve encountered in my life.