You hide in a thin sheet of warmth,
Coloured with yellows and orange,
Of kindness, care and love.
Painting me with what I thought was festive.
Showering me with "I love you"s and concern.
(Have you eaten? How was your day?)
Did you ever truly care?
My heart constricts at the thought
Of your sweet honey coated tongue
Whispering lies into my ears for "a fun time".
Compliments, flattery and beautiful poetry,
They spilt from your mouth so easily.
Said to many people as a way to grasp
Their heart and their soul.
I'd soon have to repay tenfold
With outrageous dares.
Faking my own happiness,
To repay all your kind words such as
"You are my world."
I loved it when you said those words to me.
Every bit of flattery you've written in me,
Every bit of concern you've shown me,
Be they fake or real,
I loved it all.
But, honey, all your "I love you"s mean nothing
When you only say it after you've used me
For fun, for entertainment, for pleasure,
I had to say goodbye,
I was unhappy,
You loved the idea of me
That showers you with attention.
Of course, I'll miss you.
I'll miss that sweet mouth of yours,
I'll miss the romance that you showed me,
I'll miss the warmth of your (fake) concern,
I'll miss your beautiful ways to say "I love you."
But I what I won't miss is,
The way you were my puppeteer
And I was a mere doll looking for love.
The way you stroked my hair,
Only to strike with bitter requests.
The way you left me when you were done
And came back the next day for more.
I hated the warmth of your breath,
Contrast to the bleakness of your treatment.
I hated the warmth of your love,
Contrasted to the coldness of how fake it was.
I hated that.
I hated you.
But even so, oh honey..
The melancholy I feel when I cast you away,
Is beyond comprehension.
For you've played me like a game and won,
You've captured my heart and painted it black.
But you've yet to capture my wits.
I was being used.
I'm not a blind fool to what you are,
But, oh, I fell for you so hard
And now it's a farewell.
Goodbye, my love.
Goodbye, my parasite.
By Arcassin Burnham
Brainwashed over time to not believe the theories,
Talking , why you speak to Siri?
For all your problems , you get weary,
I let God sort it out,
Hasn't come down from the throne,
His presence was there since birth,
But I hope he desends his physical on Earth,
So the lust and the evils will disappear,
No longer embezzling death and fear,
Do your research on everything and you'll be fine
In a world this crooked dear,
And they say,
"People take care of their phones like pets instead of really taking of themselves",
And that's why the parents nowadays need professional help,
And counseling for the love ones they lost to text messages and tweets,
Did the tax dollars really just move on their own and grew feet,
Man the devils busy just like God has funny ways of miracles,
Rope is tight for black people that America provoked,
Staging wars for other countries trying to kill us , Trump that's you?
The end is near , and they are gonna sensor this by the time that I get this through.
I can tell you my crimes so let me shoulder your pains
You looked at me funny and said
"Do you know what you're saying?
Jacob this isn't a game
I can't be feeling the same
I told you not to fight for anything there's nothing for you to gain
And now things are harder between us
Because I don't feel anything for you
There was a wall for a reason
Please, stop trying to break through
You told me you love me, and it's been on my mind
I know you're lying every time you tell me you're fine
I met him before I met you
Trusted him before I met you
He's still on my mind even after I met you
But what can I do?
Because I think you're still not getting it
A few months earlier with you and maybe this would be different
Maybe you do really get me,
That's the thing that upsets me
I want him, I'm in your mind
I think it's best you forget me."
Maybe you're right, I think I'll never get it,
Love is making me blind
I picked up the phone and I slammed it down
I realized, who am I to go around ruining the happiness you found?
I went and told my friends, and they told me I'm dumb
I'll be drowning in alcohol until my heart goes numb
Until I can realize I'm fucking done
"You know my heart wants more"
I say that, thinking you wont break it again once more
You can tell me I'm wasting all my time
But I've been looking for all the signs
And I've been finding it in you
They play with paints,
They play with the new skins,
The naughty children didn't listen.
Their now cutting away at the skin,
Hoping to take away something,
And replace it with something fresher and new;
The want to be "Prettier",
More "Interesting and funny,"
They don't wish to be made fun of, they want to be loved.
They hum out dark tunes that sing out the pleas for help,
No one knows that everything is painted one.
The children are lost, scared and confused.
They don't know, "Who are we," They wonder silently,
Hoping they could ask but they know better then to speak to loud.
They can't see the damage,
So they keep putting innocent child's paint on their raw skin,
And washing it away and re-painting for something better:
A good, polite child that everyone wants.
Each time one washes away another is put on.
They children are addicted,
But this addiction is as dangerous as the drugs.
Its a crime, but their is no law against hurting your self-esteem.
Painted masks that cover the low self-esteem.
That doesn't show all the scars that won't heal,
But simply manifest into something bigger.
The young children that learn to put on masks,
Have now forgotten themselves.
Alright, I'll admit it, I was wrong and you were right.
We were sitting there pulling at the knots that were much too tight.
Alright, I'll admit it, you were right.
I was trying to find darkness when there was only light.
So, yeah, maybe I was wrong.
But we knew this would fall apart all along.
So, yeah, maybe I was wrong.
But you always knew I was never that strong.
Okay, you caught me in the lie.
I was sitting with him while you were at home begging to try.
Okay, you caught me in the lie.
I was telling him I loved him while you tried not to cry.
Yes, I know, Sorry won't cut it this time.
Because I'm over here trying to apologize in a rhyme.
Yes, I know, Sorry won't cut it this time..
This mountain was just too big for me to climb.
Alright, I'll admit it, maybe I was wrong and you were right...
So... yeah... maybe I was wrong...
And ... okay you caught me in the lie.
but yes, I know, Sorry wont cut it this time...
those lies cross your lips,
evading the space between us.
my veinless wrists grasp
onto the thin edges of your skin.
I am, speechless
at the mystic aura
that surrounds you.
I am, deceived
by the soft, brutal waves
that shake me to the core.
to your lost touches
and woven lies...
My Darling, she's not good for you
I bet all that she can do
Is complaining about things you do
Don't you see that she's no good
That no way she ever could
Do the things to you I would
Can't hide the truth, I'm no good liar
Quench her whining with my passion's fire
Do me a favour and just pacify her
I'll confess and won't pretend
I really hope that in the end
You'll switch from her to my boyfriend
In your age, my child,
Even I told the cutest of lies.
Such an imaginative kid I was,
I realize that it has been my forte.
One day, I stood on the balcony,
It was 1993 and I was so young.
I was not even 3 years of age,
I urinated there in the balcony!
My mother remembers it sharply,
She always tells me elaborately.
She was there as dad scolded badly,
"Why did you pee in the balcony?"
I was so young,
But not at all naïve.
I was artless,
But also naughty.
I live inside a research campus,
National Dairy Research Institute.
And here has been a cattle yard,
My father had shown me the cows.
So whatever came to my mind,
I just denied having peed there.
"I haven't peed here, daddy,"
"Who peed then?"
I said, "A cow did that, daddy,"
And I blamed a cow for my doing!
"How did it get here, did it fly?"
My dad asked the toddler I was.
I just nodded my head,
My father was amazed.
He looked surprised,
And my mother just laughed.
"Darling, I love your sweet little lies!"
I've lost count of how many times I've cried
For the impossible desires
For the lost haven
For the stubborn hope.
I've lost count of how many times I've tried
To let go of you
To accept the truth
Only to come back for more.
I've lost count of how many times I've lied
Holding on to a silly pride
Letting you think everything was fine
Just to show my pain through my bleeding lines.