Keller 1d
I say I attract toxic,
Deep down I think
I crave it.
She writes her pains
In between the lines
Of the story of her life
..
Forever stuck in
What could've been
Forever wondering
What should've been
Forever tormented by
What would've been

Never stopping to think
How if she finally
Imprisoned the ghosts
Floating in her future's past
She wouldn't really know
What to do with them
(Some broken parts of a poem I found in one of RH's old novel drafts which I absolutely loved. Happy Writing!~ BM)
Aishah Apr 14
I am in

my own kind

of hell


and there is

no escape


until I've paid

all of my sins
am I the only that is stuck in the same cycle?
starryskies Apr 13
To the one who's inside this body,
to the one who's stuck inside
this body and mind,

those words just don't mean anything.
Those words just echo in plain air.

There's just shades of blue inside.
Estella Apr 12
It was never supposed to be this way.
She never meant to be in the middle-
But now that she was
she was stuck like glue.

She would watch them fall in love,
watching from the sidelines.
Because to her it had become a game,
A game she was never meant to play.
Amanda Apr 13
I am standing beside you
Heart resting in outstretched hand
Hoping you will take it
Use it to try and understand

I do not know why I hurt the ones
My arms care about the most
Maybe it is the ocean
Of paper insecurity I host

I have many loud problems
Make numerous unerasable mistakes
Cause more damage than flexible ripples
Shown from angry earthquakes

I know that "I am sorry"
Does not change what I've done
Or fix the childish horror you feel
This grave guilt weighs a ton

I am so used to fucking up
Destroying parts of my life that are good
That I have convinced my mind
I will not change and never could

I set limitations for my abilities
And cannot seem to find a way around
I stay in the same dark place
The self-loathing to which I am bound

You do your best to rescue me
Nothing works for more than awhile
When my pleasure and excitement fade away
You are back to coaxing out my smile

I appreciate your full efforts
They help my behavior more than I show
I hate the impatient look of frustration
You wear with concern when I am especially low

It is not that you don't make me happy
Neglect my emotional needs
There is a gash inside my obnoxious head
It is small but constantly bleeds

It leaks doubts into my brain
Until I question my quiet worth
Leads me to believe that the world
Is better without my memory on Earth

I am aware you think I'm amazing
It makes me like myself less
To watch you give, yet expect nothing in return
Pour your perfect heart into an unworthy mess

I may be what you desire, but not what you deserve
I am reckless, you should be with someone more stable
I am stuck in my ways, trying to grow
Mature and strong but I am unable
Why is it so hard to change?
I'm stuck in time, Unable to move
My mind is unhinged, I'm confined to this dark place
It's in the creases of my head, In the back corners of my brain
It's spreading in to my soul, Ripping me apart
I'm unable to move forward, I'm am stuck and I want to get out
But my pride is to high, To say i want to die
I want to end this, I'm a waste of space
If i told you, you say i sound to stupid, you wouldn't take me seriouly
You'd judge me just like she did.
that's what I'm most afraid of
Sanny Apr 12
My desperate cries led you to ignore me.

You heard me, but chose not to listen.

You left me stuck and confused with the pain from your empty words..

The words of a fragile love song.

I'm left with sadness, caused by your true words.

Don't wait for me, you said.

I guess a fool never learns.
Rachel Glen Apr 8
i'm an open book with torn out pages,
misprints, flaws stained in ink,
looking for a patient editor.

but it's hard to hold you,
when the night is still young,
and i'm shaking, twisting, turning.

this heart of mine, forever inclined,
to find the one that sates this hunger,
the burning desire of wonder.

novel feelings of unending love,
lust that singes and burns the pages,
from lips, tongues, fingers, that sing a sweet praise.

yet all i find is one more tedious lie,
a heart half gone and yearning for another,
or simply a waste of time.

if only i could find you,
and take your hand,
surely our souls would bleed into the sand.

instead,
here i am,
waiting for rain.
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