I knew not what love is,
That was,
Before I had met you.

I knew not what caring is,
That was,
Before I did care for you.

I knew not what feeling is,
That was,
Until you kissed me.

I knew not what lust is,
That was,
Until I kissed you.

Yes, I have always missed you,
And now,
I don't feel like loving anyone else.

youdon'twanttobelikeme
consciously wasting away at the ripe age of 17
smoking to savor the sensation of decay
fucking in the graveyard of dreams
or going to vinnies to pray.
youdontwanttobleedthewayido
lies upon lies. im lying now
im. trying to lie down
but my karma is unbalanxed
and i cant feel the sweet release of sleep anymore
so i sit down and weep ashey tears of the mouth
to keep my tastebuds alive.like its the decayi need
while my mind runs 6 feet underneath

I can tell you my crimes so let me shoulder your pains
You looked at me funny and said
"Do you know what you're saying?
Jacob this isn't a game
I can't be feeling the same
I told you not to fight for anything there's nothing for you to gain
And now things are harder between us
Because I don't feel anything for you
There was a wall for a reason
Please, stop trying to break through
You told me you love me, and it's been on my mind
I know you're lying every time you tell me you're fine
I met him before I met you
Trusted him before I met you
He's still on my mind even after I met you
But what can I do?
Because I think you're still not getting it
A few months earlier with you and maybe this would be different
Maybe you do really get me,
That's the thing that upsets me
I want him, I'm in your mind
I think it's best you forget me."
Maybe you're right, I think I'll never get it,
Love is making me blind
I picked up the phone and I slammed it down
I realized, who am I to go around ruining the happiness you found?
I went and told my friends, and they told me I'm dumb
I'll be drowning in alcohol until my heart goes numb
Until I can realize I'm fucking done
"You know my heart wants more"
I say that, thinking you wont break it again once more
You can tell me I'm wasting all my time
But I've been looking for all the signs
And I've been finding it in you

I pour it out
Like a bottle of wine upon the ground
I have spent myself therein
And soaked into the bitter grass
Behind the house

Because no expectation can withstand
The truth within
Which is that you can control the consumptive means
To make or break most anything

I pour it out
Because I can

So long, farewell (yeah)
My ship has sailed,
And I'm so glad it's over.
My heart mends well,
After all that I've been through
I've found myself.

Knowing love, so overwhelmingly strong
Just as much as this hate
But with a heart so pure
I know that this love is the cure.

In your age, my child,
Even I told the cutest of lies.
Such an imaginative kid I was,
I realize that it has been my forte.

One day, I stood on the balcony,
It was 1993 and I was so young.
I was not even 3 years of age,
I urinated there in the balcony!

My mother remembers it sharply,
She always tells me elaborately.
She was there as dad scolded badly,
"Why did you pee in the balcony?"

I was so young,
But not at all naïve.
I was artless,
But also naughty.

I live inside a research campus,
National Dairy Research Institute.
And here has been a cattle yard,
My father had shown me the cows.

So whatever came to my mind,
I just denied having peed there.
"I haven't peed here, daddy,"
"Who peed then?"

I said, "A cow did that, daddy,"
And I blamed a cow for my doing!
"How did it get here, did it fly?"
My dad asked the toddler I was.

I just nodded my head,
My father was amazed.
He looked surprised,
And my mother just laughed.

She said,
"Darling, I love your sweet little lies!"