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I'm nearly 20.
I thought by now I would be able to see clearly,
But it's cold outside and a little foggy,
Don't really feel in control of my life

I'm a little dizzy

I feel naive, trying to plan my life out,
Truth is those plans drive me crazy,
I'm lost in the moments of adolescence,
Makes me sick, makes me weary,
I thought my life would nourish me plenty,
Not to say I'm simply unhappy,
It's just that i can't help but think that...

Why have things turned out so differently?
What is life trying to tell me? To teach me?

I'm nearly 20.
I look like a delicate seed but feel like an old oak tree,
Worn in, old and bashed against the sea,
Feel like I'm drifting motionlessly,

Into that sea

The captain's dead and rafts are broken,
haven't got any sense of direction,
Wonder where i am going,
Floating in introspection,
And I just can't help but think that,

Why have things turned out so differently,
What is life trying to teach me? To show me?

I'm nearly 20.
Lost my childhood, sadly
I'd be lying if I said i haven't lost more, frankly,
But no regrets, they've shaped me into the man I am, even if it's been crazy
And i just can't help but think that

Why have things turned out so differently,
What is life trying to teach me? To show me?

I'm nearly 20.
Thought I loved him
Boy did he put me in a frenzy,
Shame you were a waste of time and money,
But I'll never forget your eyes- soft blue eyes staring at me kindly,

I found a home in them,unexpectedly,
Don't worry though, I will still be friendly,
And i just can't help but think that

Why have things turned out so differently,
What is life trying to teach me? To show me?

I'm nearly 20.
I've not been a saint, incidentally
Realize I've made bad choices, with and without company,
Ready to put them a cemetery,
Bury them into soil and dirt,

Maybe then I can look back and feel less hurt so i just can't help but think that

Why have things turned out so differently,
What is life trying to teach me? To show me?

I'm nearly 20.
Still writing sad poetry
Listening to the same old bands,
Unfortunately,
Feel like I'm changing, not the same old me
So much more I could be,
What happens now, I don't really know,
But I'm nearly 20,
So I guess we'll see.
Wrote this one a while ago.
Molly 1d
Remind me to look at you
when my Mary Janes have been worn through
and your Levi's don't fit quite like they used to.
When time and proximity have distorted our view
and our irises are a little less hued
and it seems we've exhausted every angle
of an eternity built for two,
remind me to look at you
like I did when your Levi's were new.
My cart draws on,
But life goes no further,
It twists and turns,
My grip gets tighter,
The path I chose,
Won’t go on for ever,
Yet I cling to this cart,
I can’t hold on much longer.
As time goes on,
My hold gets lighter,
It bucks and kicks,
I thought I was a fighter,
Can I let go,
I can’t go any further,
I don’t want to be here,
Fighting any longer.
My tracks seem to go no further
Thedrop Oct 9
I have changed.

Through the addition of each day,

Through everything I am part of.

I hope I am better,

But it is hard to say.

I do know I am different.

I see the new through everything that has gone before;

Today through yesterday, and the days prior;

Through memories, all memories, each one in its place,

as now mixes with old.

I feel it.

This must be what they call age.

I am reminded..constantly reminded,

That at the passing of each moment,

Of every thought,

Of every memory,

Of everything that has happened,

Of every strong pull,

Of every touch of the heart,

Of every tear that falls,

Of every wound,

which longs to heal,

I can only be here
Translated by Przemyslaw Musialowski 9/27/2019

You are the Sisyphus of the modern world,
you try to move the boulder in the streets
narrow and winding, but it's so heavy,
and getting heavier on the scale of passing time,
you are getting older and older after every midnight,
so your figure - becomes angular,
and the cobble-****** street - trodden and slippery;
and the gutter has overgrown from all kind of the sewage
- you have scratches that don't want to heal,
the cataract has crept into worn-out eyes.

Youth has betrayed you, but not only you
- you'll get a wreath at the big funeral.

Copyright © by Wieslaw Musialowski 12/4/2018
Simon Oct 4
These memories of mine,
These senses through time;

Whisper of a never-ending summer,
And never-changing souls.
As if hidden behind ones own reflection,
Never to be reached again.

For, the only place this exiled world is permitted,
Is amidst the realms of dreams and limbo.
And solely a gaze beyond oneself,
May reveal the leap between realities.

So, here I stand on the edge of beginnings,
Ready to join the eternal summer;
Misled by the luring benevolence of timelessness,
In need of guidance back to the truth.
This is a description of me facing the inevitable fate of growing up and losing the innocent, doubtless and strong person I thought I was. Instead now I am left with a choice. Choose ignorance and safety and try to become the harmless kid I was, or accept my destiny and explore the depths of my monstrous capabilities. If the wolf tries to act a sheep, what will he then say to the impulses of his nature?
And you know I truly love you
Reckless child, that's what I am.
Nonetheless,you know my heart is real
Unrequited love that's what it seems
Loving you was worth the risks
Find me in another life
One day, when the time is right.

Please forgive me for feeling this way
And for dreaming that we could run away.
Just let me love you in my own way,
And then I will slowly fade away.
Radiant and irresistible that's what you are,
In my heart, you'll remain every tick of the hour.
Let me love you as long as the sun rises in the east,
Longing for your love as long as it sets to the west.
On the other side of this life, I wish that we will never be apart.
This poem is for a man I truly love but can never be mine.
I loathe the fear of my age
most of the planet are younger
than I in my envious loathing

The youth that own my once adolescence
scare me with their robotic ways
zombie eyed into small screens
oblivious to beauty and danger

Judge them not my ego pleas
were I born in this century
me too would be like them I suppose

They are the future keepers
of our climate changing world
so I must respect their insularity

Social awareness is played online
in a virtual world of non contact
of a physical nature

As humanity loses its senses
I lose all sense of what I knew
Not an attack on the young. An observation of technology challenging our very existence
Shadows on the grass
Tails untold
Music in the clouds

I lost something close to me
Most go an eternity and never come close to its warm embrace
I felt it’s lips
Caressed it’s skin
And with every kiss t'avais promis
With every smile t'avais promis
Every tier t'avais promis
You were mine
You were uncompromising
Sharp and precise in what you wanted
And I like a babe dove trying to fly
Blowing up a storm

But age is like time is fleeting
what stands true is always within grasp
time waits for no man and age cares not for your level of wisdom.

Be the man
Be a man
Are you a man
(DEFEATED)

It will not wait for you to understand the value of her
It will not converse on your behalf to turn back time.
Get it right the first time
Try hard
Try harder
Try even harder

LOVE
sweet yet better
True yet fickle
Has no mercy for those who cannot be true
Not willing to embrace her with both arms
She will scorn you for your misdeeds
You are in training
And at some point you’ll get a second chance
don’t let it go
stick to the Promise, t'avais promis
Don’t let its eternal warmth fade
be true.

BFFF ***
She was perfect
I was flawed
We were great
A life untold
17
At 17 I will be free
I'll read the letter I sent to me
I'll see the change so clearly
And know my own complexities

At 16 I am afraid
And grades are the worst I've ever made
My mind could use some first aid
There is no rest, no desert shade

At 15 I was close
wondered who would miss me the most
hated myself for thinking anyone would
hated myself for thinking

At 14 I was brilliant
And I was oh so resilliant
In my passions I was dilligent
And yet my mind was distant

I will be 17
And when I am what will I be?
Will I still be brilliant?
Will I yet be free?
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