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Twang of iron behind teeth
picking yourself up again, again
from a self-penned melodrama
(one with a snot-sobbing end)

Clouds part, lending a single beam
striking your heart, and you know

Dragging the back of your hand
across fat lips that creep up
for the first time since constant bowls of cereal
and giggling, cartoon mornings

Collecting everything that’s yours
in one hand, a little blood
the doorway shines and you’re gone
I choose detachment;
Excitement brings more distress,
It never brings peace.
Excitement is agitation and agitation leads to desperation which leads to bad outcomes.
Excitement is born from expectations and expectations assure disappointment.
K May 9
You gotta see things from another perspective in order to aprecciate what & who you have... to figure out what you want to do, where you want to live & who you wanna be with.

Don't ignore the eager to run away, to experiment, get lost, connect with people, explore places. Escape... Go!
Right now is the perfect time to do things that make you feel complete & joyful because these young years are the best to do so. To choose the life you want to live.

I don't want my life to pass me by without having the chance to actually living it.
It's a scary thought to leave, but it's even scarier to stay in the exact same place where you are no longer happy.

Right now it's hard for me to imagine living another life different than it is now, because it's been like this for 9 years now, but I can't help to have this feeling of me not fitting here anymore, at least not for now.
I want to leave so I can take distance from everyone & everything, so I can see if this is the life I want to be living or it's the life I suddenly found myself living but not choosing.
Don't worry, don't rush into leaving, when you're ready you'll feel it in every bone.

This moment right here is where there's nothing and no one holding me back... it's just me waking up.
Commit all kinds of sins
Enjoy pleasures to the hilt
Being ruthless without guilt
Draw solace from others' pain
Exploit the poor for personal gains
Dilettante of art and literature
Make queens to serve your purpose
Bed breaking toil at night
Holy man during daytime
Enjoying clout of high and mighty
Social climber of the society
Not afraid of Almighty
For they taught you
He is forgiving and kind
Just bow before Him
And pray in a temple or church
He would condone all your sins
You could go scot free unpunished
I love the way you do not love me.
But I hate the way you go and never tell me that you always love me by your side.
Indonesia, 12th April 2021
Arif Aditya Abyan Nugroho
Don't call me a volcano,
I don't want to be a volcano!
Sometimes active,
Mostly dormant,
A stiff peak with indigestion,
Birthing igneous isles
across the seas,
Starving for eruption,
Hardening.
Waiting.

Call me a hurricane,
Say it with a tremble.
Never expect me,
Dread my return.
Never dormant,
Always hungry,
Carving my path,
Landmass by landmass,
Conquering, Striding,
Devastating.

Get your facts straight
Before you name me a disaster.
Jay M Apr 5
You simply cannot understand
The extent of all of the things I wish to do
All of which with you
The list goes on and on
So darling take my hand
And together I will show you
The wonders within my wildest of dreams

- Jay M
April 5th, 2021
Places to go, things to see, and who knows what else lies ahead. All I know for sure is; it's you and me.
"just a cut" she said
"just a scratch" she'd reply
"what's that mark" you'd ask
"Oh I fell"
just an excuse
just a lie...

"What's with all those bracelets?" you'd ask
"Just thought they were cute"
just an excuse
just a lie...

except it wasn't
instead it was
"just one more"
until she's was gone...
until the person you once thought you knew has left your side...
was i not enough?
Choose Love over Fear.
Choose Love over Fear.

How do I know which one is which?
Can I choose fear and love actively together?

My daunting question is,
Can I lose myself due to love?

Well, my dear.
Do not listen to your fear.

The Universe notices bravery
when you take a leap
in love,
and trust yourself.

That is, what she awaits for you.
For what ever decision you make,
to trust yourself.

The Universe hears you,
but she is waiting for you to listen.

To stop asking everyone around,
for the answers you seek within.

Listen to your inner knowing.

To trust.
To choose love.
To Be brave,
and you will not be disappointed
in what awaits.

When you trust yourself,
and act in love,
Love only expands from here,
my darling.
Ring of white rope bound to my soul
A glimpse of a life drowning away
My heart lingering on the edge of no tomorrow
Soaring cliff above all the rushing water

Let me lay this rope down
Unburden this weary soul
Never shrinking from what drags underneath the water
Grasping at unseen air to breath

Just take me down the river,
Don’t  fight the undertow
Just take me down the river
The sadness you don’t want to know
Just take me down the river
Don’t fight the undertow
Let this weary soul flow away now

No use fighting against the current
Sorrow and heartache is not the solution
Let go of the rope and all the pain it holds
Float on and take the hits

Raging rapids drives your rage
The drop off kills you bit by bit
Up to the last big drop
Into the deep, into the deep

Just take me down the river,
Don’t fight the undertow
Just take me down the river
The sadness you don’t want to know
Just take me down the river
Don’t fight the undertow
Let this weary soul flow away now
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