zeebee 27m
my mind is a vinyl record
in some places, scuffed, scratched
it skips every once in a while

covered in dust
the shine below
smeared with fatigue

a haunting melody of one hundred and forty thousand, one hundred and sixty hours
over and over and over
looped, destined to repeat forever
the same melody, the same song
a soundtrack of forgotten impulses
and broken thoughts
and misplaced trust

i listen,
my own audience,
and i wonder when
the key change is
but all i hear
is the chorus
i'm fated to sing
for an eternity and
a few spare minutes

because who knows
how long it takes
for a finished record
to stop spinning
Hollau 4h
I could never find the right way to tell you,
I know words won’t be enough.
I didn’t want to talk to much,
just wanted to show you love.

streetlights passing; every one gets me a heartbeat closer
to where it started beating.
walking down the street from the day we met;
even after everything, I can’t forget to think of you

you acted shy, but I didn’t miss your grinning face.

scattered hearts, broken glass;
getting lost in the sounds of our hearts beating;

all I ever really wanted in this short life was you

my heart feels drunk;
your smile’s a drug.
with every moment that passes, I melt.

I’m ecstatic like a drug addict, strung out and spellbound

I feel your lightning in my veins,
I’m speechless, words cannot explain

I feel an aching when you step into my body in my mind
though I try to resist, I still want it all.

you were all that I was looking for,
could have had my heart, it was yours

let’s watch the evening sky,
witness our souls come to life;
dreams can melt like snow.
show me a sign, show me some life,  
without you, I’d lose me

let go of all your haunted dreams tonight;
I know your soul, I’ll be your home.
when the lights go out, you still got me.

you’d fit so perfectly to me,
we’d end our loneliness.

we lost track of the time
dreams aren’t what they used to be;
some things slide by so carelessly

we raise our love in a timeless land that is far out of reach

I remember how we were before;
it don’t feel like memories.

I fell in love out under the moonlight,
you took my hand and held me close, for once I was alright.
there was magic in the air and you were right here beside me.

we look up at the stars, a perfect night to dream with you
how I hope to have forever to spend right here in this world with you

feel all the things we might breathe in the air tonight,
get lost in our escape;
breathe in the air too late

since one day you will disappear, I’ll keep every part of you.

I remember when we used to be so close,
every now and then I think of when we broke.
held the strings tied to my heart; pulled then pushed away,

why can’t I get over you?
your love is a fire, I’m still high on the fumes

you are the piece of me I wish I didn’t need,
chasing relentlessly;
and I don’t know why.

when the night falls, the loneliness calls;
time to figure out how to chase my blues away.

when I fall into the dark you always haunt me
bags underneath my eyes, all of those sleepless nights
without you in my life

give me one night to man the pain.

every time I close my eyes I’m dreaming about you,
it keeps happening all the time;

even when the memories are put to bed, I think of you

I swear I could feel you in my arms, but there was no one there at all
I tossed and turned in the end;
I searched again and again, but I never found you

I’m still loving you in my mind.

nothing I haven’t tried to get you off my mind;
there’s no good reason why
state of dreaming has left me numb.

I just can’t get you off my mind and now I’m gonna be up all night
I’d rather stay awake when I’m asleep.

I just want to leave us behind.
It’s tearing me up inside.

I’ve cried for you, you’re in every part of me.
melt this curse away.

fading lovers,
two hearts beating on with different rhythms;
falling apart, still we hold together;

who are we to call each other selfish lovers?
we all need someone to hold.
I know it’s too much too soon to tell you that I need you by my side.

from the start we were changing,
I should have seen the signs;
no trace of what we could be

your heartbeat stops as I’m walking away
wait for me because I want to be where you are.

you know my love can hold you down.

I can’t fight this feeling, it’s not in my head;
I know it’s something I did.

oh how I miss the days we’d get carried away
am I just overthinking feelings I conceal?

everything is shattering, and it’s my mistake.
I meant to make it right.

don’t know what I was doing.
I ruined all the love we had before.  

I’m not freaking out, but I’m afraid of losing you.

I’m stuck in this fear
you put my life back together, I’m not broken anymore;

you will never know what you mean to me.
I hope you know, I can’t live without you.

you’re all I ever need,
I should be holding you.

I spent a lifetime on this, but I would give it up for you.

I make too many mistakes, better get this right.

face to face with all the voices in my head
do I still have to mean everything I ever said?

I won’t be the victim,
so slowly letting go;
but the world still moves on.

never thought that I could feel this way
what am I holding onto?

I wish that I could stay.

walking down the street where I broke your heart,
and I think of you.
holding it together ’til I fall apart
when I think of you.  

take my hand and remind me
of what we used to believe and dream to be.
take me back to when things used to be so simple.

run to the moment and set me free.

we’re smiling, but we’re close to tears
trying to make it work.

can we go back to where our memories don’t exist;
fall away and drift to where we won’t be missed?
won’t you come back into me where you belong?

you can count on it, I’m where you left me
I can count on you to show me the way

hope that I can turn back the time to make it all alright,
I promise to build a new world for us;

gaze into my eyes when the fire starts,
fan the flame that melts our hearts;
illuminate a world that’ll try to bring you down.

know that it’s you; the reason that I come alive, it lives in your eyes.
these will be times that I will miss.

not gonna tell you that I’m over it,
I think about it every night

my heart’s burning and it’s turning black,
but I’m learning how to be stronger

tonight I’ll breathe in the future and tear down my walls,
force the feelings away ‘cause
they were never meant to stay.

I never wanted it to be this way,
I might’ve thought that we could last forever
the days felt so long, things fit perfectly

all we ever wanted is to feel alive.
it’s too late, I’m sorry, darling

I’m slipping through the place that we once knew,
all I can feel is you.

I lost you, now I see
I’m not in love and you’re not worth my tears;

now you’re just a name, a face I used to know
but everybody seems to look like you.  

we’ll fade and be forgotten, like ashes; washed away
no trace of what we stand for; what we could be

together we wait for silence.
fall into the hands of a greater unknown.  

I’ve been worried if you’ll be okay;
I don’t want to miss you once I’ve waved goodbye.

don’t wanna waste love; don’t wanna hurt you.

understanding that I have to go this way is harder than asking me to stay

I’ll go alone and never speak of this again;
I’ll depend on you.  

I cannot come back this time;
I will be listening for you.

isn’t this, too, just fate and nothing more?

I know we’ll become who we’re meant to be.

I hope we find our missing pieces.

fade away, fade away, I say to our love.

I love you dearly
Composed of lyrics from songs that I've listened to over the years. I wanted to show how the narratives and emotions flow together to create one that relates to my perspective
you know it’s bad
when the thesaurus is lost for words
when gravity
starts pushing you towards her

she is a once-in-a-lifetime person
i only wish i was worthy of her kindness

so keep your eyes open;
find a boy you like
someone as good as you
who’s smart enough to treat you right

you are a once-in-a-lifetime person
i only wish that i deserved your perfect
Sunday's bell broke the recess
And three times, as professed,
The gavel rapped before the rooster's caw;
The horn was blown, the drum was beat,
And in the top of ev'ry street
We swooned with the wounded at the wall
And we said nothing but our prayers
But if someone's heard something,
Nobody cares

And now, with the yellow moon
Fixed beyond the clouds that loom,
It soon would be a day the devil owned;
High on horseback, thru the mud,
They came to bathe their hands in blood
From the thumb up to the funny-bone
And still, we said nothing but our prayers
But if someone's heard something,
Nobody cares

And, by and by,
We will crawl
Before we fly
High above
The Middle of Utopia

Lightning made the thunder ring
Until the dawn, when suddenly,
Light divides the darkness in the east;
Thus, once more, the wheel, it turns,
And proves itself a vip'rous worm
That gnaws upon the bowels of the beast
And still, we say nothing but our prayers
And if someone's heard something,
Nobody cares

And, by and by,
We will crawl
Before we fly
High above
The Middle of Utopia
send my warm regards
to san francisco
tell them the art
they export is beautiful
ask them what it was like
on those sixties summer nights
oh how i wish
that i'd been there

scope out a spot for me
in tokyo
tell me where
the spots are i should go
will it remind me
of inherited memories?
then say hello
to my extended family

if you stop
in new orleans
tell them i've already been
there within my dreams
i've heard so much about them
on momma's old records
i'll be there to visit
when i travel the world

carry my words
wherever you go
my message in a bottle
will be my warm hello
i cannot be there
at least not today
so let these words suffice
to send the pain away
can't afford a real ticket, so poetry will have to do for now
My endless emotions can ..
Never  be described..
My emotions can not
Ever be confined..
My mind always has more to write..
But raindrops..
can not ever be described..
My heart always has more to delight..
But this happiness..
can not  ever be described..
My beats always has more words to unite..
But desire..
can not ever be described..
My   fingers always has ready to indict..
But creation..
can not ever be described..
Wet soil's fragrance can not be defined..
The joy of childbirth...
can be only  realized..
The expressions of love..
can not be clarified..
The soul of words..
can not ever be described..
Read more poetry like this written by me at
she’s a precious rose bush
i can’t see what she’s going through
all i know is i’ve got thorns
in me

i grabbed on with both hands
to a mirage romance
which left me bleeding
with only a glance at you

through a desert i wandered
went four days without water
nothing could replace how much
i wanted her

she had her sights on another plant
i know i didn’t stand a chance
i guess that happens when you handle
a rose bush
I hear those whispers in my ears,
Just like the flutters of a butterfly,
The words that I want to hear,
The words that's lost somewhere,
Like a fine song that leaves the flute,
I strain to hear the tunes of wild,
The bamboo calling out for me to try,
I closed my eyes anticipating the shrill cry,
My lips circled and blew the tune,
Started not right, but there was a music..
Music that followed the sway of trees,
A song that embraced the whole outdoor,
It wasn't my worry if my tunes were wrong,
There was no one to listen to this particular song.
I knew then I should take the steps alone,
My ears tuned to hear those little whispers,
Let me make a song from what I heard and what got lost somewhere,
The filled blanks are my emotions,
When I played them in my flute,
It got better and better..
Even the lost song is for a better tide...
Back in the day music was good.
We enjoyed ourself no matter what part of town.
From the shotguns, to the high-rises.
The urge that instantly becomes testimonial.
Immediately we'd feel better soon as the music plays.
We'd forget everything else.
Like millions of feet echoing through our ears.
Our body reacts.
The experience of true euphoria when the music takes over.
Suddenly the load doesn't seem so heavy.

From the condos to the slums.
The mark of an era.
Going on down the road.
Nothing to do but walk.
Strut your strut.
The struggle to be free.
The stratosphere doesn't seem all so far.
The absolute rule of thumb.
Coming alive blowing out the dust,
The relationship between artist to listener.
To welcome birth.
The experience of it all.
Nothing but the road in front.
Strutting along.
Living, breathing.
To enjoy yourself no matter what part of town.
From projects to burb.
To step off the curb leave work behind. 

Dance the block.

Clocking out.
Stepping to life.

Some of the best memories ever
my raspy
voice is
euphoria but
revere sole
of she
that rejoice
with spontaneity
and invariably
my unrehearsed
vocal is
flutelike always
depict its
comp as
discretion with
a valet
in Wodehouse
novels indirect
A song with soul
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