Bestfriend since I was 15, even though we've known each since around junior high.
She the substance that keeps my fire alive,
When I'm naive, or my common sense falls asleep, & it seems like I'm blind,
She opens up my eyes, & I see through the lies.
Every day is tomorrow's memory, she's made them nice-
to watch inside,
my eyelids-behind,
like a movie screen with a beautiful scene.

Allowing me to realize that even though it's rough, it'll be alright, we were built tough & together—we are anything but a bluff.

I love you, Jessica,
& I'll have your back through this "fight",
called "life".
To the extent of the end, together we can make pain, change...anything mend.

Enwebbed into one, we can melt hate into fun, because you pull me outside
When I hide in my world—that cage in my mind, only you can find.
You've brought truth, trust, & shine like the Sun's truest-amber-light, without even needing a sky...

You—rays of the purest Sunshine,
& I—shades jaded of indecorous Nighttime,
Forever you
& Forever I.
My bestfriend,
I love you—
—To the end,
thick like thieves in crime, I'll be at your side, & I know you'll be at mine-
-too, it's as sure as the wind, that'll always come again.
-Ashton Amstutz


there's more worth inside you than you know.
you might not ever believe it - how hard it is to get your head around; their words sounding like false truths on a well-meaning tongue - but it's there, undoubtedly present.
i see it on your camera roll. in your actions, words, and the intelligence you don't think exists. in your humour, laugh, and the grin you loathe.
i'm sorry you can't see what those around you can, but know this: if you've nothing but disdain for yourself, we'll take on the role of loving you twice as much.

around you, i romanticise life.
the camera bag's slung over your shoulder like it belongs there... it's midday in the saatchi; all self-portraits and ivory walls. there's always a path of london we've yet to explore - step by step, we get there. we're smiling in the summer rain. i've a copy of NME in one hand, a patisserie valerie bag in the other, and stars in my eyes: it's pricey stores all round. it's never been what we're used to, but i find myself pledging to come back with you when we're wealthy... however long it takes.

it's whatever, but it's us: in an afternoon of temporary normalcy; genuine, beautiful elation, before we put the smile on the shelf and return to melancholia. two train rides home - content (happy?) for the first time in...? ((i really do hope you felt it.))

idealised flashes of the future.
side by side, we'll watch eachother mature. we'll progress. like flowers, we'll grow - maybe even learn to love the people we've become.

perhaps it gets easier over the years.

platonic love letter to a best friend, and a day that felt okay. i'm not used to writing about happiness

I will not tell you to stop being sad or that there is no need to worry because you and I know that depression and anxiety don't work that way. Telling someone to stop being sad is like telling someone with OCD to stop locking the door 36 times or telling someone with asthma to "just breathe". Pure and utter bullshit. So instead, I will tell you to cry, cry until you've created an ocean of the abyss that lives within you. Wallow in self pity, swim with your sadness and dive in all that negativity. Just keep in mind that what I'm telling you is to swim, not sink. Keep swimming, swim as far as you can, swim until your body aches with fatigue, until your muscles cramp or until you get sick of the water. Then when you've decided you've had enough, comeback to the shore and there I'll be waiting.  Once we've dried you off, I will rebuild you with donuts and icecream.

For the pineapple to my watermelon.

My foot has landed
on an unknown pebble
of information;
it rolls underfoot and
I tilt back with
a blinding blast
of panic.
Up is down
and down is
horizontal as I
tumble down the
s --
    t --
        a --
             i --
                 r --
                      s --
I've been so
p  a  i  n  s  t  a  k  i  n  g  l  y
I land in a
knot of shock and grief
a mere
couple of steps from
the very bottom,
the very beginning.
hurt, confusion, and anger
t  w  i st and       u
                          t          r
around me in
a smothering weave
that settles over
my senses.

I wish I didn't know this unwelcome cloak.

I wish I didn't have to know how to remove it, inch by inch.

I wish I didn't have to move past
midnight talks
midday laughs
frequent promises
to be

I wish I didn't have to let you go.

More on my lost best friend. Poetry has sort of become my coping mechanism/therapy for this. Hope y'all don't mind.

I can remember
My little brother's birthday
When you sat next to me at the table in Chuck E Cheese's
And looked at my turquoise flannel,
Smiled and said,
I like how you button up your sweater all the way
And zipped up your jacket to your neck.

Tribute to my now-deceased uncle, June 1990 to August 2017.
Tonie 6d

Let's do Karaoke
and pretend we are on key
Sing our hearts out loud
Dance like no one is around
Every lyric might be symbolic
don't worry cause tonight we'll be alcoholic
Let your emotion out
and use a song to tell me what is it about
Sing to me all your fears
but don't drop a tear
And just to be clear
remember I am always here
This night might never end
just like our friendship that will not bend
For we will sing together,
Until we achieve our forever.

Liz Carlson Aug 7

You're the light in my darkness.
You can always make me smile.
We've laughed together,
and cried together.

We're miles apart,
but we're always in sync.
You'll always be in my heart,
no matter how distant we may become.

You've impacted me like no other friend.
You're my partner in crime,
You're my best friend,
You're my sister.

We talk about anything and everything,
nothing is off limits.
I tell you all my secrets and you entrust me with yours.
I treasure our time together,
even if we're just being lazy.

You'll always have my heart,
no matter how far apart we may be.
I love you forever.

a freckled face:
sharp and dark eyeliner outline
the brand new skies in her eyes
and i wish i could capture the moment
she smiled at me for the first time

a strong personality:
her mother taught her
to dance in the space between
being vulnerable and guarding her heart
and i wish i could capture the moment
she took me to that place for the first time

a gracious heart:
strawberry cheeks and fits of laughter
fill the void in my bones
giving me the best kind of chest pains
and i wish i could capture the moment
she referred to me as her "best friend" for the first time

i think everyone deserves someone like the honeybee
someone who is fierce but gentle
someone who you could never find in anyone or anything else
someone who should always be followed by a round of applause
someone who plants happiness with each step
and watches it bloom around her little town

you are a champion and you help me to see that i am one too
you encourage the best parts of me, abby

i hope that i do the same for you

Foolinglife Jul 30

Hey best friend, I couldn't tell if its good to be with you or the things get worse off. But you are only thing i feel truly, when I'm alone in the dark or when I'm in the brightest sun surrounded by hundreds of unknowns. I like it here with you in the black, it's better than emptiness, trust me.
They say it can't rain forever, that there will come a time when it must cease, when the last drop will have fallen and no more will be left. But to me, I just don't care. I don't wait for that last drop. I am okey to be here, just staying in the cold, comfortably numb with you.
What i carry with me is heavy, and it gets heavier day by day. I don't want to carry it but I've no choice. It follows me like a shadow, sneaky reminder of where I'm, and how this place Just doesn't belong to me. It hits me like a rock and crushes me into pieces.
Shattered, broken, tired, I stand here struggling to keep breathing when my entire body seemed to sag with exhaustion. I for once again start collecting up the pieces to readjust them to their original places. So, I've thought of staying here with you, as its better to be sad than falling in a hollow where there's no end. Don't you think the same?
Day by day everything is growing in strength else than me. I wonder if things will get better but I no longer hope so. I am just inhaling and exhaling in the moments greeting the sun every next morning in a grief no less than bereavement.

Dear bestfriend, you and I are bound together by destiny.
Atta Santoso Jul 18

We are not dating
I don't like you.
You are one of my friends, and I love you as friend.

I saw your brown eyes in many ways:
when they're blue, I set your mood to red.
Setting fire so we could burn the whole blue horizon.

When they're grey, I laughed a lil bit because your idea of everything.
Listening to our dream and dancing till the day comes.

When they're brown, we went to our own world.
You were the king and i was the queen, ruling our kingdom and executing our sadness.

man, those were the days we looked at each others and said some bullshits.

then, the day came and we took different paths.

soon, I'll see you sit beside me, cheering the moment from our thrones.

As friend.

Really wtf is this. I do have boyfriend- and he's one of the sweetest asshole ever. Im so sorry if there were grammar errors becuase i gave no shit when i wrotr this lol.
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