Everything inspires me.
The precious breeze, that whistles daintily.
The clouds, that form images grand.
The breath, that empowers with wisdom.
All things inspire me.
The sweet smell of blossoming roses.
The rainbow that expands in sky.
Even rains that come to cleanse a darken heart.
Everything inspires me.
The magical times that reveal miracles.
The smile of a child inside day.
And The simple praise
from one poet to another.
All things inspire me
as I move to the music of my heart.
I have this
Empty hollowness
In my chest
I am nothing
Yet I have
Everything
I feel empty
Yet I am
Full
We’re all little wrecks
Waiting for the day
Someone notices
and snaps a photograph
Vintage and beautiful
I’m a flight risk
Waiting for the day
Someone notices
and helps me tumble down
Broken, dysfunctional
This is how it happened
Everything was
wonderful Then
everything went
crazy
This is how it happened
You were perfect
wonderful then
Everything went
everywhere
Thinking back to the days
When we were
The lovely reckless
We sing in silence; a beat with no end
With the clock turning, waving its hands
Refraining from paying us attention
Acting as if our problems didn't exist
Each second bore thoughts
Each second was an infinity
Of all the good things and bad things in life
Following a small chain,
Linking itself into seamless events
In a cycle of a second, in every millisecond
Everything in the world is happening
At this moment of nothingness, and it's insane
Because everything and nothing is happening at the same time
And you're now nothing, yet you're still destroying
Every single thing about me.
she often wondered what he thought when he looked at her.
he did it a lot.
he just stood there and stared...
but now she understood.
because now she knew where his heart was.
maybe he wondered how to tell her.
maybe in his own way ,
he wanted to tell her...
if only he knew.
that she could be happy for him.
that she would celebrate his happiness.
maybe he would tell her....
and when she looked at him.
she now knew.
that she was happy for him.
that he had found love elsewhere.
and she hoped this time.....
he would be happy enough to commit.
~September 5th, 2017~
~Sometime between 10 and 11PM~
Her:
You're an empath.
Me:
I guess so.
Her:
Have you ever thought about it?
Me:
Being an empath?
I never knew there was a name for it.
I never knew there was a name form my kind of pain analyzation. Like I have some kind of supernatural power to read into pain of all kinds.
Her:
Is it that you understand other people's pain or your own pain or both?
Me:
I think I’ve always done both.
Her:
I had a feeling.
Here we go.
Her:
How does it affect you?
A loaded question, and being the person I am I answered it the only way I knew how:
Me:
I always get this feeling that when people are sad or hurt, I have to be too.
Sometimes it’s just my way of showing that pain is just something people have.
But mostly, it makes me helpless to stop other people’s pain.
I get sad, like some kind of way to share the pain that isn’t even mine.
And when it is my pain, nobody can seem to understand it fully.
And it’s not like I completely understand someone else’s pain,
but you see and hear a lot when you turn silent for awhile.
Lots of people try to say that people aren’t alone when they suffer.
And most of it is comfort.
But most of the time I see people in pain, and I don’t see a reason to comfort.
I see more of a reason to just be there.
Experience something beyond yourself.
There a certain type of selfless peace that comes when pain is no longer just one person’s fight.
It’s not about being together in pain. It's about experiencing life with pain just passing by.
It’s been said in books, “Pain demands to be felt”
I don’t know, something about that makes me wish I could do more.
But yeah,
I’m empathetic a lot of the time.
Maybe that’s why I stick around even when I shouldn’t.
I stop. I've said enough.
Me:
Sorry, I’m rambling...
That’s a ton of text.
Silence
And for a minute, I wonder if anything I say is being understood.
Her:
The way you speak is beautiful.
I'm marvelling in it.
... I sit in awe. Grasping at a full acceptance of the way I convey myself in feelings, but more importantly, here, in this moment.
Her:
You speak poetry.
Me:
No wonder I’m a poet.
It’s like destiny or something idk.
Part of me wishes I would have spelt the whole phrase out, it has the same amount of syllables.
Her:
I'm here for you.
I suck at comforting and that's not what I want.
All I want is for you to know that I am present.
And sharing the fight.
This, THIS right here, is companionship, and friendship, saying that "I can be here", and that will be enough.
Her:
I want to fight with you.
Even though I'm not very aggressive.
Hearing this said, "I want to fight with you". Not "I want to fight for you". This says more than any kind of battle with someone at my side, this is real, in this moment.
Me:
Hahah, we’ll fight it with music or something.
Doesn’t have to be aggressive.
Faith, hope, the essentials.
We're believers in things like love, God, and good songs that rock the world... and we don't need much more than that.
Her:
That said, music can be aggressive.
But we'll stick to the essentials.
We'll stick to our guns and hopefully, we won't have to fire.
Her:
Please know that you can ramble to me as much as you like.
I love it.
I know... me too.
Her:
Goodnight, love you.
And as we come to an end, we fall back into a small but familiar silence between us.
Me:
Goodnight, love you too.
-End-
your hand to hold
and your kiss I miss
your hugs my shield
your love my everything
Everything is fine
just close your eyes.
Slowly drift away
don't worry about a thing.
Once you're asleep,
those feelings will melt away
and you will wake up
in a brand new day.