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Ryan Jan 30
When did children lose their love of learning?

When they were told to conform,
To forget their being,
To discard interests, agency, creativity

My own complicity
In the stifling of identity

Authenticity, a digression of the self,
A dissolution of swarming
Complexities

When did I gain my love of learning?

The burning crucible
Of curiosity

Set aflame by rejection of conformity

Constraints, curriculum, crushing expectations
and a world disintegrating
fires of digressions

When is conformity an expression of authenticity?

When is authenticity just another form of conformity?
kate 4d
Inside me are moths.
Obnoxiously flapping, they refuse to resist,
scraping my insides with froth.
Ignoring them, I ball up your collar in my fist.
As harsh as you are, I don’t refuse your kiss.
Goosebumps litter my skin.
“Don’t you have somewhere to be?”, I hiss.
I hate how I fall to my sin.
Entranced by your cursed gaze,
My stomach bursts at the seams.
Flashes of hazel throw me into a daze,
My heart palpitates in broken, unnatural beats that scream for release.
The moths do not release.
This isn’t right.
I wake up in a cold sweat filled with regret.
So He clears my sight.
I pray for satisfaction that I cannot forget.
And so the urge disappears,
Along with fleeting dreams of you and I.
I am that memory
you try to leave behind
I am what you almost forget
I rewind my eye
and stare back
I am that blink you can’t bare
and regret
I am that memory
you try to leave behind
I am what you almost forget
I rewind my eye
and stare back at you
I am that time you can’t bare
and regret
It’s a beautiful day,
A Saturday.
One of those effervescent Spring afternoons  that buzzes with sunny activity,
a neighborhoodly kind of
picture perfect blue sky kind of
everything’s gonna be okay kind of day.

I stare at it from the corner of the couch,
through the window at the lawns across the street from the corner of the couch
and look down at myself.
*****, covered in soil from head to toe.
So bright, too bright out there
through eyes that have been languishing overlong in the deep brown black of the underground,
behind masks and walls,
closed for fear of opening.

They dazzle now and squint,
watering at the light,
not watering,
crying, crying,
etching riverbeds upon my ***** face.
How long was I down there?
Dreaming awake and automatic,
watching her water the houseplants and
comfort the friends
and rock the child
while I shoveled earth over my living form
to protect this vulnerable animal,
to bury bury bury it.

The noise doesn’t reach me
there in my cocoon.
It threatens now to crack my fragile sanity; though madness I would greet as an old companion.
I reject the invitation beckoning me from somewhere deep inside,
push push push it down,
and wave to my neighbor through the window
as he mows his grass.

It’s a beautiful day,
A Saturday,
and my senses pulse with indignation against it.
Back to the dreaming
where I will wrap my mind in cotton
and try again tomorrow.
Sometimes my ADHD brain becomes overwhelmed and the effort of sensory processing exhausts me entirely.
How the hand you extend is marked with scars
How familiar you are with rejection
How beautiful are those discolored stars
How none have been touched by hate's infection

How many are tears that drip on your chest
How much heat they hold, all stinging and strong
How much love they hold, how much do they bless
How strange that they're for the one who did wrong

How much do I ache when I meet your gaze
How my heart feels like it's all out of joint
How much does it break as you gently say,
"How could all you've done ever be the point?"

I burst my seams trying to hold your gift
A miracle hug across a great rift
Grace and reconciliation are so much more radical than we can conceive.
Max Gisel May 7
I am not sure why I did it,
Well that's what I'm going to say
Once I get caught with it.

Because we all know it'll happen.
I know why I stole the thing,
It's not very simple to explain:

The memories wouldn't stop,
I wanted some control over my life,
The urge needed to be fulfilled,

But the general, easy explanation:
I wanted to do it,
I have waited so long.

It's not like me to steal,
At least that's what they think.
I've thought about this for so long.

I contemplate doing many things:
So many horrible things,
Things I'd rather die than do.

I want to scream and cry,
Throw things, flip tables,
Show them how I really feel.

But I don't,
I keep up my reputation,
Smile through all of it.

I don't let anyone know,
If they knew half of it,
I would have no one.

The funny part about this
Is that I don't regret it at all,
I know I should.

I don't regret it,
Relief instantly washed over me,
Like the sick being I am.
No idea where I was going with this one, super un-poetic, just feeling a bit alien today. This was really unlike me, I don't steal. I'm not even going to explain what I stole because that's a whole other can of worms I'm NOT opening. I feel like I'm so ashamed for most things in life, even breathing feels worthy of punishment at times. But this feels different. I'm not ashamed about stealing, I'm ashamed about how I feel nothing negative about it.
Izan Almira May 7
A small, reluctant smile forms on your lips;
small because there are no smiles without the guilt
that comes from being the only flower in a field of weeds.
Just know, it's not your fault.
No, It's not your fault .
The Mind betrays the heart.
But no, it's not your fault.

It's not like you could know.
Paths you were meant to walk.
All paths will over grow.
Being lost is not your fault.

Your human form stays lost.
The soul will pay no cost.
It's created to bathe in light.
No darkness is your fault.  

Oars ****** you toward a call.
You'll get weak, and you'll stall.
The sea will never calm.
No struggle is your fault.

Know that it's not your fault.
Your heart takes all the shots.
It's running from your mind,
And no, It's not your fault  

For, all will over grow.
The sea will never calm.
And no, it's not your fault.
Just know, it's not your fault.

©

Derek Abraxas

"The Quantum Bound Poet"
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