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I've walked many roads through life to get where
I am but have no reason
for regret for those roads
through life If I'd never walked them I would never found my
sweetheart
The many roads I've walked through life that have bought me to where I am now the twenty years
I had with my sweetheart
as my
wife
But the many roads through life I have walked
that have to lead me to acceptance of my lovely wife who passed away no longer being
here
The many roads I've walked through life that finally have reached an end happiness I thought to never to end I do not regret walking any of those
road
So the roads I walked throughout my life to none of them I regret that bought to the where I I'm
for they bought twenty years happiness and so I can never have
regrets
No regrets throughout I have for the twenty years I shared
with Helen as mywife
I'm so overwhelmed by the amazing responses to my
my poems of Helen I write
feel so blessed by all the kindness and love of my wife
Through the poems the tributes to her I write
so proud she'd be to be known by so many people
who have felt her
love
through my words, I write
true Inspiration she has given to me and the kindness and support you all have shown me on this site and for the lovely comment I receive
from you
all
That has made me a much better writer that has helped me so much to overcome my difficulties
of being dyslexic bless you all, and
I love you all
A poem for the wonderful friends on this site who have felt the love of Helen through the poem of her I write
Johnny walker Feb 19
There's a place In my mind
that lays deep within my thoughts no one touches but me a place to where I escape all the problems facing me and this world

It's a beautiful place to where my wife and I can be an Imaginary place created through grief to where I can live my life again with her a place even grief can't touch now

For I have built a wall that can't be penetrated this  Heaven I've created In my mind there are no troubles there no pressures of everyday living

No need for money no need to buy food or clothes It's always sunny warm I can sit with Helen by an Imaginary lake, I've created In my mind we both can laugh while soaking our feet I've made
It so Helen can walk again pain-free so we can run through fields of gold

To lay on our backs look to the sky blue perfect big white clouds passing by
we create pictures with the clouds she laid In my arms
she will never leave again
for I have lost her once but never again

Because no one can destroy the Heaven I've created In my mind that I can go to any time I wish the outside world can't touch either Helen or me ever again for we are truly free
I have created through grief my own Heaven In my mind where Helen I can be to live our lives again a Heaven the outside world can't touch we are both free
Bryce Feb 13
At the ending of the world
there is a great unraveling
that celestial bow, wound into heartsong
and maestrate the caring music of things--
with these passions of the mind,
God seeking to unravel himself in the ever-fleeing
moment of philosophy, a Persephonic instance
in the archetype of love, psychotic and misnamed,
strait-jacketed in sin and given nothing but sweet
momentary decay

all the powerful souls connect sexually with the cosmos--
payed off, bastardized with a cigarette between their whispered lips
we hold no wealth but the ever-shifting dollar of life.

Fat Jack, fondly Catholic with angel smiles-- holds a rock of God in his hand, rocking softly
in god's busted gut-belly
spread like butter amongst the stars, asking all the same questions of Nirvana--
The last rumble of a skin-tight drumskin wrapped within a screaming symphonic twang of remnant souls--
Walking the notochord of corporeal form
the fantastic drone of rotorcraft, taunting the angelic lads and their brigadier God, singing psalms of limerence
Charlie Parker, musical sadness
Jack-man gladness
Don't forget them in the moment of monastic incantations

High-risen pyramidicals
Euclidian pitter-patter against the gusts and rains
in familiar, repetitive shapes the droplets of ichor
elucidate the frowns of downtown humanity
the locked door at the edge of the room, the air evacuated in fear,
seeking safety in the favorite belfry of an ancient wailing abbey
the dusty oil-towns of century ago
Imbibes the modern-day Maricopa plain
folk digging for dino-rock and black gold, selling dreams to downtrodden lost boys
the mistakes of RV park families

Farmland road
in Louisiana brew
the atmosphere, keeping personal thoughts trapped
a high-pressure zone
the ever-wandering
churning winds of eventual hurricane
the sequence that tickles Fibonacci's fancies and
calls us to dream--
a great Babel of God's consistent scattering heart.

in this great combustible chamber, loud obnoxious gaseous veils
in a low sigh our precipitate souls
smog on the failed shackles of stale blood
dripping this oil on the lips
holding friendly smiles
hiding sickening grins
callous, angry, the honey-chalice sought be not by man or God
alike;

Charlie Parker, playing the world's instrumentation
a track to follow
faded as the ancient road roaming
Rome's wet snail trail
blinking and shimmering into existence
a dewlit morning
the conglomerate rock is a cradle for human discomfort
admitted and hidden
to be a better hold than the hands of the earth
in these cornmeal roads,
digging out sugars from her *****
and sipping on the liquor of life in classic fermentation

to hold the road in your hands, the world on your lips
to tell the catacombs of love you would be her hostess,
seeking answers in the bones of ancient souls and refining
in deep sighs,
loving the things we cannot be.
Johnny walker Dec 2018
There was something so special about Helen, the first
time I laid my eye's on
her, it was that I felt
so
much more aware, for
It wasn't just her being
so pretty which
she
surely was, when I looked In to those blue eye's I saw the  real beauty of Helen that  I believe was her
soul
Looks aren't everthing
you have to bring out through your love that Inner beauty that lay deep
Inside Your partner
wife
lover or just friend then you'll know what true love
really Is as did with
Helen
Inner soul the beauty that lays within a worried soul that cries out four love
clever Jul 2018
Orlando.
Eleventh.
X.
Synchronicity.
Delirious.
11:11.
Cabo San Lucas.
Gratefully dead.
You in my head.
you're about to catch that flight, said you wanna wait on me. told you i'd been up all night, but it's better not to wait on me.
You rarely sleep
Yet here you are
On uneven mattresses
With multi colored sheets
The sun bit you today
And so did I
You're about to start snoring
I'm about to turn out the light
We made love not too long ago
On the floor of my mother's spare room
And if I didn't know any better
I'd think that I'd been listening to the
Sound of you breathing beside me
For a life time
Rather than a day or ninety nine

I think I love you
Perhaps you'll stay
crawl into bed
coffee stained sheets
i don't **** strangers
i don't bring tea to bed
not anymore
don't bring myself to bed
can't sleep in bed
bird Jun 2017
you have overstayed your welcome
and im overdressed for summer
but its ok to sit here at this summit
and wonder, will there be another
because you know i do too
but we both feel the strain
from reaching out over mountains
to fumble at eachother
even when the sky is clear

and the wind is at our ears
im sorry ive never seen winters
sheen or autumns eyes
because
summer has never ended
and i cant bear another season
of tears
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