She’s the girl at the party
reading ****** in the corner
instead of conversing the idle
she never learned how to read books with blank pages
She has a heart of gold
it’s just a bit broken
Can’t you hear it?
It’s beating for you already
She’s looking to be soaked in safety
not just comfort
She thinks she may find it
in your dry sense of humor
She wants you to untangle her twisted mind
She’s searching for someone to understand
the evocation that is her soul
that she’s a black hole
yet a ray of sunshine
That she desperately yearns for attention
but burns under the spotlight
Beautiful and tortured like the sea
Don’t judge her for the too many sips she takes
She’s just trying to forget
the things she never deserved to know
She’s using liquor to put out the fire in her brain
No one ever told her that it just helps it grow
She doesn’t want to feel alone in this crowded room anymore
She wants to run through the forest chasing butterflies
the way she always has to feel alive
She’ll make a paintbrush out of her own hair
if she has to
and paint her words on the moon
just to feel special for a minute
something she’s never been able to prove to herself
Because it’s hard to hear her echo
underneath the ocean
even though you can see her reflection in the sky
She’s the girl at the party
reading ****** in the corner
Don’t be afraid
Stars can’t shine without darkness after all
Hurry, before her lungs fill with water
Won’t you listen to her song?
She will learn the chords to yours too
Accept her because she’ll always accept you

- Unicorn

Serum sternly slaps
Unloosening your straps
Not as strong as other rhum
But still can bang on your heart drum
It's somewhat soft and somewhat oily
It doesn't taste rough, but rather sweetly
Beginner's drink, but not of avail
What shame, outside of Czech Republic it ain't for sale

I miss the                    
                sober you
And the things that we used to say
                                                     and do.
                              I miss the sunny days
Before we went our separate ways.
I miss
            my friend
And the messages
                                      we’d send,
The things you’d teach me -
                  Like how to make a perfect cup of tea
You figured George Orwell knew best
                       But I wasn’t
          as easily impressed.

You text me out of the blue
                                                      at 3am
Then don’t seem to
                         text me again
You’re already turning to
                                              a half-
formed ghost.

A staggering
                       phantom

                              at the very most.

I wonder why you bother with me:
          
              What is it that I’m doing wrong that I can’t see?

You’re there                    
                                   and then
                                                                ­      you’re gone,
A fading,
               flaking
                                 phenomenon.

A few            
                   more pints of beer
And suddenly      
                        you’re right                            
                                                                ­     here;
Our conversations are back too
                              But what ever happened to sober you?

Once
                     you showed up when I didn’t expect you to
I didn’t need to guess,                      
                                 I already knew
                       Your face was
                                             drooping, your eyes glazed
It's                    
              so common                              now                                 ­                                                                 ­     
                                      that  I’m                
­ no longer fazed.

Why do you only talk to me
                    when you’re ****** up?
                                   Why does this feel like a *******

breakup?
                     And I miss you            
                                                 ­ so much;
I miss my close friend

                    Why won’t you tell me
                                           What led to sober you’s end?

Surely,
                   there is something

                                            that I can do

                        To bring back the very
                                          
                     ­                                     best version of you?

When some days
are not so bad as others
but you’re still drinking
and miserable.
The inching hatred
of who you are
but not what you’ve done-
that’s depression.

People think im a child
20 minus 10
You don't know what i have seen
What i have felt
Abused
Broken
Addicted
We all have made decisions

Mine haunt me
My dreams
My thoughts
My daily life

Abuser
It was amazing
The control you took
You pushed me past my limits
I loved it
I was AdDiCtEd

You left me
Broken
Lost
Confused

Yes i'm drinking.
What's new?
It always makes me think of you
"you don't need that"
"really Zoie? another one?"

I should've listened.
Now i'm addicted.

Terrible the amount of anger spewed;
unrealized and uncontrolled.
Where honesty is meant to come off her tongue,
resentment instead is rolled.

Fighting to get through the pain,
trying to let people in.
But with lack of sauce to keep her sane,
irritability is sure to win.

Coming off as someone she's not
... what it takes to change,
I'm so ******* terrified because
to me that person is strange.

I made it clear
I wasn’t looking for anything besides your friendship.
I confided in you and told you my deepest fears and insecurities.
I was vulnerable,weak, and intoxicated
You used this to your advantage
As I stumbled, pushing you way, I tried to say no. Please stop.
You continued running your hands along my body ******* me like it was a game
As I stumbled, pushing you away, I tried to say no. Please stop.
Your grip tightened on me to the point that I have a physical reminder of what you did
As I stumbled, pushing you away, I tried to say no. Please stop.
You saw me only as an object. Something for your pleasure
I stopped stumbling and stopped pushing you away. My no turned into tears as I realized you weren’t who you said you were.
I’m scared to see you again because I know we both think differently about that night.
You were sober. I was not. You said yes. I said no.
You had the choice to walk away and you didn’t

one with the rust,
trickling into the soils--
one more sip i just
gotta watch the smoke coil...