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Four years I was under your control
I allowed myself to let go
Breaking hearts and causing pain
I drained the girl I loved away
You tore away a life for me
A piece of me
But now I'm here to take control back
Four years have passed
Now I can say
Hello sober me
You're here to stay
I have wrote this regarding my addiction to alcohol and how I come to a decision of no longer allowing it to control my life
hj Jun 24
I remember an old guy he was an alcoholic hospitalized with me, he used to cut his cigarette filter so it guests stronger, I do the same sometimes, I wonder what he’s doing now. When we used to ask him he used to say “I’m already messed up there’s nothing left to ruin” I wonder if he’s okay now if he finally has something to ruin, I wonder if I do too, and then I remember you. I remember your eyes looking at me like I’m the only thing that matters in this universe, I remember, how u could know if I was asleep or pretending to avoid a conversation, you said my eyes smiled when I fell asleep, I dont know what you meant by that, but it made me smile. I remember you proposing to me with a pine cone, and promising me you will do it again one day, but for real. I remember spending two days locked in a car with you, you were worried about me, you wouldn’t leave, we slept uncomfortably, but we were still comfortable cuz I was in your arms and you were in mine.
I remember dancing with you in the er as we waited for me to be admitted, it was cringy and cheesy but I didn’t care, in your arms the only thing I care for is you. I remember your lips on mine and how they tasted, I remember how the universe exploded but disappeared at the same time when you kissed me for the first time. I remember when You pinned me me against the wall and kissed me as if I was the only running river in a drought. I remember the flowers I sent you and how you keep them, I remember how u put my birthday gift in a box filled with those same flowers that you dried, it was a necklace a ring with wings, it was a promise. A promise that one day, we’ll have everything, we’ll have a house with a garden, and cats, so many cats, one day we’ll have kids and I’ll tell them how much their dad loved their mom, that’s how they’ll learn what love really is, one day we will have something to ruin, we will have everything to ruin, but we won’t
Gem Palomar Jun 21
pleasantly bothered,
with ***** came a violent lust,
honeysuckle, you suckled me
thunders struck as bodies aligned,
tongues entwined

I rocked with your rhythm,
your fingers had me opening up
like I was among the Primroses
you stroked at night
drunken eyes, gasping mouths

savage, reluctant, insatiable
you are, while I was, and still am
bewildered, dazed, but unfazed.
with the intoxication of spirits,
came a heavenly sin
D A W N Jun 11
no matter how intoxicating you are
my aphrodisiac girl,
you can never entice my
i am listening to aphrodite- rini while i attempt my job account to commit suicide in this ****** workplace( im trying to get rid of it) , and  i thought abt her (very random ***) and how she works with deities and that is sosososoos attractive *** . ive also thought about downing a wine bottle awhile ago  hence why i gave birth to this poem :p
Kora Sani Apr 30
everyone said it was a hard pill to swallow
so i held it at the back of my throat
would i become better or worse for this

white wine
followed closely behind
making sure the pill found its way
to my bloodstream

they never told me
i would have to do this
until my body became numb
to the side effects

and even in the aftermath
after the side effects dissipated
i was told
to keep going

each gulp
becoming a reminder
of what never was
and what couldn't be
kate cc Apr 20
At the heights of a Surrey valley
is where I stand alone.
The clouds roll in with attempted suppression,
wuthering, as one may say.
Yet they succeed and I do not.

All this vacantness on the moors,
in turn: suffocation.
All this gale of violence and madness,
not a single shiver,
but a private, intense burning sensation.

Would it set fire to the moors, the libraries,
and the red curtain theatre?
Or would it melt the defendant themselves?
I wish for the former,
yet I am already melting.

I put my hand on the gnomon-less sundial,
and still I stand alone
drunk on the all-consuming emotions
inflicted by these brick walls
or rather the crowds of unpredictability within them.
much less thought put into this one than the previous. this one's more of a go-with-the-flow led by my emotions during my writing session.
Anyone can enter your church
No matter what their age
Mine, well, you have to be legal
At least in the section that doesn't serve food

Yours smells of incense and candle wax
The air smells of wood polish
Mine has stale beer and on humid days
Remnants of cigars and cigarettes from years ago

We have windows that can open
But, most times they are painted shut
Yours, beautiful colors of glass
Images from the bible, glorious

You have a choir singing the grace of God
My place of worship has live bands once a month
Karaoke on Fridays with wanna be singers
Making us pray to God for it to end

You have pictures of Saints on your windows
And tapestries on the walls
The closest we have is posters of sports teams
And The St. Pauli girl promoting beer

You will never find me at your church
But, we may find you in ours on occasion
We don't have sacramental wine like you
But, we do have a larger drink menu for all

People come to your church to wash away their sins
Then a few hail Mary's and a Lord's Prayer
With us, they come to drown their sorrows
And our hail Mary's have bacon, 2 for 1 on Sunday

Our sky pilot will listen like your pastor
He doesn't judge unless you get too drunk
But, that's on him, not you
Your pastor won't judge, but, still gives penance

I know where I am Sunday
I know where you are too
Your church is not always open
Mine's good from 10 till 2
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