i carve my body into your ideal shell
but no matter how hard i try

it will never be enough for you...
as long as it functions
without any problem
it is merely your
    mostly unnoticed
tool to get through life

once it acts up
doctors step in
and you are lucky to recover
Surrounded by love,
It’s my highest priority.
Making others smile,
Ignore the negativity.

Don’t listen to the hate,
Not healthy psychologically.
Enjoy every moment,
Listen to all the positivity.
all the pills I took
make my thoughts blur,
mind is fuzzy.

i can barely stand,
the world is like
a rocking ship.

swaying back and forth
as the sea tosses me
between the waves.

is my head still between my shoulders?
patting where it should be
all I feel is air.

where has my mind gone?
to the clouds
far from ground.

i lost it
i don’t know
where I could be.
Give me a rose
Give me your heart,
Grab my hand,
And make me stay in love.

Pull my body closer
Whisper little lies in my ear,
''I love you...'', lie to me please.
I want it all again
I want it to destroy me again
Oh, in such a rough and pleasent way...

How can I let you go?
I will never let you go.
You are mine even though you've never been.
Stay, lie, pray and die.
Let's make love.
Our kind of love.
It's you. It has always been you.
the pleats of palms and matrices of skin
the dunes of sand and dizzy heat storms
the salt caught between nails
the salt caught between throat
its grinding coffee and grinding stones
the ash of grandparents beneath morning suns

the soft hair and pillable bones
the bend of spines and curved branch ribs
the wrists jutted out, splintered with paint brushes
the wrists scented with patchouli and hay
its worn leather boots with frayed laces
the bowl of granola buried in milk
the pleated skin
splinted soft muscle blooms back
to reveal bone crumbling to sand and milk
i feel weightless
gummed smile
i become boneless under your gaze
and soft, crumbling
i fall to the floor
when I die

turn my body into ashes


spread it over the ocean

so I can go home

after a lifetime of feeling

Inspired by Amanda Lovelace's book "the princess saves herself in this one"
- a mermaid escapist
e J 4d
Entwined bodies
Ushered speed
Parted lips
Hasty thrusts
Open legs
Red face
Intimate sounds
Agonizing Release
Sorry for the adult content. This has been in my folder for a minute and I decided to post it. Not meant to offend or disturb any users. If it's concerning to others I will remove it
Blanche 4d
So many Junes and Julys
I spent watching the paint dry
on our brand new cream walls
instead of going to play football
with the other kids my age in the street.
I sat and wondered why
my shaking knees did not smile, why
my bony fingers could not disguise
their quirkiness under pretty blue eyes
like all the other girls did.

And yet many paint coats later
I now realise that these walls have not changed
anything but their colour
in the many years my parents have lived here.
My parents, who spent so many years teaching me
to be loyal and kind,
not only to others
but to myself.

I like to think that if the walls could talk, they would say:

It does not matter what colour you decide to
dye your hair (or your walls),
because those who really love you
could not care less.
We have seen you grow into the person you are today;
stubborn, passionate and genuine,
but we know that you may still need to borrow
other people’s glasses to see it.
The road to self love is difficult
but know that you must love yourself
before loving anybody else.

You may not believe it yet
because you see others as the galaxies which
you could never be, but we promise that
you are the stars, and anyone who refuses
to look through a telescope to see that
does not deserve to see you shine.
There are lakes and rivers waiting for you
with open arms, and sunrises
which will put on their best colours
just for your eyes to see.

Your body is made of stardust,
you are stronger than the trees you have grown to love,
and though you may not be perfect
you are enough.
i'm trying to teach myself that self love is the best love, even if it isn't easy. this is my first poem, I hope you like it x
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