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Doubt is a cloud hanging
              over me.

And the rain is a reminder,
            that ill never dry off.


I just want to hold up high,
                        strength,

                                                  so it keeps
me dry of tears seeping though stitches.

But on this day, I'm ill prepared and
            the clouds drown me in droplets


of high felt emotion.


                   Raining down unimpeded.
Lost 2d
Down and
Down and
Down down down

Where am I falling
That goes so ******* far
Down?

Am I even falling?
Is this open air?
Or am I sinking—
Drowning in despair?

All I know is gravity
Weighing down inside of me
Squashing my guts
Riding me
Gravity is on top
I am bottoming

Submissive in nature
I perceive myself as helpless
My environment dictates all
She is my strict mistress
No control over my fall
I sink further into distress

I stopped wondering where I’m going
All I know is it’s down
Spinning, twirling in my descent
The world around me whirling about
I stopped wondering where I’m going
And started to look around
At the sky drifting farther away
And the impending ground
austin 5d
I'm not sure if the sun came up
I haven't seen it shine
There's something wrong, I think I'm stuck
I'm running out of time

I'm not sure if I'm still awake
I think I might have drowned
There's nothing here, it feels so fake
I think I'm falling down
annh Sep 26
“The conflict at the moment,
Is you're literally,
One tweet away,
From the market being down,
5 per cent.”
My day routinely starts with a quick whip through the AFR, and this line caught my eye. Not my usual kinda post and by no means poetic, but there you go.

'As the impeachment movement picks up, Trump will counterpunch. He's shaping up as a master politician and markets don't like that.'
- Greg Bundy, FAM Chairman
Eh?
Not a could in the sky.
Oh why, oh why.
I am as blue as
the sky?
Oh why, oh why.
Is the there no
reason to feel this way?

Must be something deep,
deep in self pity.
Must be something in this world,
Full of self pity.
Or just emptiness is the life
of this city.

Stuck in the patterns
of the day.
Don't stray, don't stray.
Chewing on another broccoli day.
Don't stray, don't stray
It must mean something,
for us to feel this way.

Towns mean frowns.
Pounds mean sighs.
People are just mean.
Hands are stained.
Minds are clean.

I guess life
is meant to be
such a bind.

Stuck in the patterns
of the day.
Don't stray, don't stray.
Chewing on another broccoli day.
Don't stray, don't stray
It must mean something,
for us to feel this way.
Andrew Sep 24
Can you feel that?
Ah, gifts
** **-**-**-**
** **-**-**-**
** **
** **
** **

Drowning deep in my sea of clothing
Wanting your purchase I feel
(Will you give it to me?)
It seems what's left of my nice side
Is slowly changing in me
(Will you give it to me?)

Looking at my own reflection
When suddenly it changes
Violently it changes (** **)
There is no turning back now
You've woken up the naughty in me

Get up, come on get down with the Christmas
Get up, come on get down with the Christmas
Get up, come on get down with the Christmas
Open up your gifts and give them to me
Get up, come on get down with the Christmas
You mother get up come on get down with the Christmas
You ****** get up come on get down with the Christmas
Many are the gifts that have been given to me

I can see inside you, the naughty is rising
Don't try to deny what you feel
(Will you give gifts to me?)
It seems that all that was nice has died
And is decaying in me
(Will you give gifts to me?)

It seems you're having some trouble
In dealing with these changes
Living with these changes (** **)
The world is a naughty place
Now that you've woken up the ******* in me

Get up, come on get down with the Christmas
Get up, come on get down with the Christmas
Get up, come on get down with the Christmas
Open up your gifts and give them to me
Get up, come on get down with the Christmas
You mother get up come on get down with the Christmas
You ****** get up come on get down with the Christmas
Many are the gifts that have been given to me

No mommy, don't stiff me again
Don't do it again
I'll be a nice boy
I'll be a nice boy, I promise
Why do you have to stiff me like that, mommy?
Don't do it again, you're boring me
Why do you have to be such a *****?

Why don't you
Why don't you just ******* and die?
Why can't you just ******* and die?
Never stick store brand in my face again *****
*******
I don't want this ****
You stupid sadistic abusive ******* *****
How would you like to see what's real mommy?
Here it comes, get ready to buy

** **-**-**-**
Get up, come on get down with the Christmas
Get up, come on get down with the Christmas
Get up, come on get down with the Christmas
Open up your gifts and give them to me
Get up, come on get down with the Christmas
You mother get up come on get down with the Christmas
You ****** get up come on get down with the Christmas
Many are the gifts that have been given to me
Parody of Disturbed's Down With The Sickness
Arden Sep 23
Maybe I can’t stop
The downpour But
I will always join you  
For a walk in the rain
I’m feeling this way,
I don’t yet know how to escape
Yet I know it will evade at some point,
I’ve been drifting in and out,
Without much sound,
For maybe a year now, maybe only a second.
Should I think it’s an overstatement?
Is that what I’ve been lead to know?
Or is it just my mind bringing false accusations to surface?
Could it be because people want to doubt me,
Or because I assume if it’s happened to me it’s just a little bit, it’s only small; it doesn’t matter,
Not at all.

Three years? Four or five? Maybe none,
It’s not real, this doesn’t count.
Anxiety. It’s anxiety they said.
We’ll give you these pills,
Because you’re complaining about something else,
But we won’t acknowledge that.
You feel terrible, but we’ll say we’re treating the thing that you’ve put in some sort of remission.
Listen, listen. Why do they never listen?

It’s not that bad. How do I word it?
I could say I feel dead, but not really,
It’s been worse before,
So I don’t feel like I can use that description anymore.
It will go away soon,
I should be happy.
Actually, should I? I should feel tragic.
I do but I feel good sometimes too.
Why am I trying? No one who sees this will understand.
How about, it’s this:
I want to do something but I don’t feel like anything.
I don’t feel good but it’s not anxiety -
it’s been trickling in, but not this time, it’s not just that.
Maybe my emotions have just gone underground today,
Maybe it thought it would match to how I’m physically feeling.
I woke up so exhausted, I told someone I’m sick,
Still sick,
And they said being tired doesn’t make you sick,
But this isn’t normal tiredness,
This isn’t feeling down so your body can’t be bothered either,
This is one way of what it can feel like
When your body’s done with you,
And mines been done a long time,
But never long enough to care,
And in a decade it still won’t be time,
But I guess I should be content because
It’s only been five-hundred-and-thirty-two days.

I know no one will believe me, but maybe that’s okay,
For now,
After all, I can’t say any of these things out loud.
Like monsters, they would all surround me, laughing maliciously,
Thinking they were right,
They’re not, but how much longer do I have to put up a fight?
No one can know if I feel stressed or upset,
Not sad because then their army will have ammunition,
Meanwhile I have nothing.
Nothing, give me something,
But actually no, maybe I can’t take anymore false hope,
Because everyone, all of them, have ******* me over,
Time and time again.
They think I’m stressed, I’m not ill,
So if I say I’m starting to become stressed, unhappy, not good...
Well I don’t know what will happen,
They’ve already destroyed every single part of me.
I don’t want to give them more reasons to disbelieve my honesty.
The world once
Stood on the shoulder
Of a giant

One idea
One imagination
One spark of light

Manuel
Miranda
Yea Lin was right

Left out of luck that brother
**** that man he shrugs
And Ayn Rand isn't having any of it

Made magic
Out of a colored
History


Made cash
Out of stories we
Skipped school to beat

No wonder he's
Super cala
Fraga

*******
Rich right now
Left here to wonder how

The Man
And his smile!
Smile!!!

Laugh at me,
Laugh with me
Let's smile and sleep

Close our eyes, get the bleep
Out of this world
Upside

Down!

Don't drown
Crossing the border
Don't drown

Yeah, we all
Crossed the line
Once

I got no
Red blood, in me
No, not an oz

In fact
I got no blood in me
I pulled my heart out

I'm not a wizard
More a robot
Chasing a blurry face no doubt

Politix
Politsticks
And stones been

Breaking my bones
Like S and M it's all I can think
Yeah I'm gre Christian

You words sting like a bee
And I'm the mouse
Your testing

Me like is this
Really real?
No pop quiz,

No lessons
In this horse ****
Call me bojack

I got mama issues
Drowned in my tears
Snowflaking, I'm making a pose

Just so you'll see
Some fine *** in *****-hose
An *** unlike any

You've seen before
Did you get my number yet
*** work, I'm ***** like

Money green
Back then
And now

And slaves still be
Slaving still
Not really real

For you
But still
Terribly real

The only way to stop darkness
Is to light it up
Burn the bridges down, burn them blue
Burn them the **** up

I'm crying
Like the movie
With the old man

And his homie
Yeah I go see Up
To get down with the helium

Speaking so highly
Fire with fire Lee
You spike me down

Blue fire on my tongue
I've got dragon in me
Call me Mulan

Or flame princess
Cause my ancestors are white
Call me Matt Damon

I'm not a savior
Im no Sean White, doing kung fu
At a gun fight

Going to Wakanda
I've got my anakanda
White with spots, she'll hunt me down

Mask on I wrestle
Your mom in a
Wedding gown

The greatest generation
Like a golden
Shower on my face

We all know
It's gotta be
Be real the tape

The cherry
On the ****
Pie served by
Some white guy

But haven't you seen
The movies
The jokes in there somewhere

A stoner like Emma I learned
God is a Freeman
And black as my Africa

Totoro's wheezing
Yeah, I'm a maniac now
Crazy as a cow

Fed me  my own bones
Can you blame that
I'm bad

At being mad, I've gone ******
I'm not a bat I'm hanging
Upside down though

Not Octavius
No Spencer
I got eyes that see through her

Not you though
Too comfy
Too open your eyes and see

You weren't made for greatness
Hypnotized by Lucy's eyes
And buttery lies in a **** pie

Butterflies
Be dying
You'd still
Be there lying

Your *******
Scared of the truth
Like a ******

I know,
I know
I am staring at you

I'm sick
I'm bad,
I know I'm tainted

Painted with a black dot
Like a white girl I wreck ****
Up, only got six rings

Losing my things
I'm such a hot mess
Like that Joe Smith

White like a prophet
Who sells
Fiction for profit

Making fat stack on cash from
Pills that are too hard
To swallow

When weeds are growing
Up on their own
I won't wallow

Caused they used it to enslave them
What the **** white man
You can't save them

He shot the sheriff
And I didn't listen
No not yet I was a kid then

But now I'm
A man
Boy

I'm Mowgli
Hear my man
Roar

Or an alien
A robot a
Pokemon

Ryan Reynolds got me feeling
Like a dead mon

Too much white in me to be a panther So I'm a penguin

Flap my wings and we all be soaring
I'm a team player, less a Bird,
More a Magic Johnson

I know Malcolm X
Was heaven sent
But I run from the spotlight

I'm not a Warren
Or Trump yet
Just a white guy that can't jump

Like a ****
Not unalike a Harry Reid
I can't play games

With toy soldiers
I ain't no 'bama
Michelle ain't my mama

I ain't Sasha's brotha
Different ****
But ****
That
Wit
Michelle ooh
My blood boils blue
For her

Would be blue if
I was an
Alien

Yeah I'd go hard
For her if
I wasn't
So afraid of him

Too much an
Ace to not be waste
For a *******
Then

I was
Poisoned by Ivy
I don't ****
With O'Reilly

Blue on blue
On blue I'm
Seeing a change coming
Kall me Kesha
Tic
TOC
*******

Witches I feel it in my blood
Now, just like it all went down there
In yorktown

Here beneath
Willow tree
I see her hair

Whipping
Whipping back and forth
She like her Dada

She got magic
In her ancestry
Clearly I can finally see

Marceline
Was right
You know

That Prince was fresh
As hell he made
Purple rain

You know that Prince in Hell
Making purple love on a
Purple mattress with a purple stain

Princes of queens
I'm blue as heck
Like a bandana

Worn at the
Banana stand
Where we first made love

My man my
Nana
No doubt

I'm cool as a cucumber
Cool as Gwen
Channeling

Monroe
With her skirt
Flipped up

You looked
Down
Now I'm looking up

Got you on camera
Now your eating up
Justice

Yeah
I heard
Her *******

She been moaning
Real bad you can hear
Her coming

From anywhere
Not any hair
Justice waxes

She may blind like
Mice but she not
Deaf yet

Arrested
Development
She breaking walls

Like she in the Good Place
Bet
Me I'm in heaven

Look
Ma there
Ain't no chains

On me
Genie in a bottle
Where you listening?

Wow got me
Feeling like
An Apricot

Princess,
King me
Four seasons

I'm never getting
Out of this
Dress

Cheap queen
I ****** up
I'm a hot mess

Mary Poppins
Couldn't save me now
I need my chimneys swept somehow

Haven't seen the new one
I'll be honest with you
Too many colors and I've been

Flying too high
For penguins
And men in sequins

Pour out that
**** honey
On my silver spoon

The ****** won and
I'm eating it now
Too much girl in me not to see the son

Of a *******
On the golden throne

Can't believe
We let him
Get a
Second one

**** THAT

Do something
Say something!

Show me
This isn't
Normal
To you

That
I'm not the
Only one fighting
This war for
You

******
Act 1
Drama

Flipped the world is upside
Down
Where the hell is
Karma

Have you seen her yet?

Dressed down
In that
Little black
Dress

All things
Up in fire
Now

Wow
Now
Wow

Things look like eleven
Seven rings got me
Feeling like
A ferris
Wheel
Cotton candy,
Nineteen nineties
Suburban and white

Inventing stories
Cause our lives
Were boring

Immigrated too early
And under my own
Conditions

Twelve years a slave
Three years old
But I'm still kinda
Itching

Read too much
Ta-Nehisi Coates
To not want
Resistance

The skin I wear
White like a lambs
Gives me some
Advantage

So I use it to the
Maximum
To fight all this
Garbage

I'm not a teenage
But babe I'm a dirtbag

Punch me up
Like Rocky
Raccoon

Yeah I was listening


She got my mystiquing
My scales blue like
A blue man


Dancing to the song
You both listened
To

The summer you
First loved her back


Jesus must be real
Cause I be seeing
Things
You'd never bet!

Things
I never
Seen before
Magic out
A tiny spore

Men behind bars
Piper got me feeling bad
Saw too much of me in them
Now I can't not be sad

But it's complex
You know it's
Complicated

Too much prophet
In the prison industrial
Complex

Immigrants
They get the job done
Been true since

Way
Before World
War

Three
Work
In progress
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