SPT 1d

As I take one last drink wiping the remnants from last night, kicking my way through life. Tin can reminders echo from a place I can never escape. I look down to dirty hands seemingly clean, yet bloodied in memories. The way she screamed, they way I left them in disbelief. Staggering more than I could slur, nothing but a coward in the mirror. I leave streaks down both ends forgetting which one faces the reality of the next day. An how I will drink again, just to forget today. And when they leave ill smile and wave knowing the story they repeat, and I'll move on......lying to myself.
Sometimes, no meds are strong enough to erase the inflictions I've caused. I guess all those fun nights, never ended too well after all. Maybe I need to think, from the eyes of a child-

halsey 1d

Dreams come alive
When I think of you.

Time lapse of
sublimation of melodies,
blurred caffeinated visions,
the smell of breeze,
with a tinge of petrichor,
cold wet grass,
the bare feet,
an impulse strikes the heart,
capillaries dosed
with sugary love,
eyelids popping,
turning like red sprinkles
of kesar,
in a cold icy lake,

this never-ending dream,
defeats an unpredictable life,
or maybe we are dreaming only,
unable to see the tombstone
of reality,

waiting to wake up,
away from the monotony,
from barren heartless lands,
to ourselves,
to create,
a life destined to
eclipse these dreams.

Julia W 6d

It's been a year
I still have no mind
I still don't think
For thinking is my downfall

My thoughts
Are poison
To my success
For they pull me off course
And push me into the abyss

I want to think
But i can not
For i've built a prison
That keeps me stuck
in this empty mind of mine

I tell myself can try to  
not be impulsive
And  not be indecisive
But i can't
For i never learn

Ive restarted my mind but
My thoughts
are useless
and unoriginal
And self deprecating
But they are still there
For i want to think

I do not understand
The thoughts entering my head
They tell me to shut up
To look pretty
And to blend it at the same time

These thoughts do not sound like me
Like the me before i stopped thinking
For these thoughts
Are not mine

It was never me
It was all of the people
Who judged me
And imposed their thoughts on me
Until they became my own

For the longest time
I was mindless
With no thought
For i believed thought was my weakness
Keeping me from perfection

When thought returned
They were no longer my own
They seemed perfect
But they had flaws
For nothing is truly perfect
If it takes away your individuality

Now i'm breaking out
Freeing my mind
I'm becoming myself
One again

I am not perfect
And i will never be
For perfection is impossible

Thoughts are finally flowing
And they are my strength
For they are my own


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how to exfoliate away outer layer of skin
what moisturiser promotes thicker skin?
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how to make it into scar tissue
can you flay all of your skin from your body?
can you burn yourself down?
can you rise from your own ashes?
how to become a phoenix

how do you move on?

Standing up peering over the window ledge
It’s hard to look down
But yet I feel as though it was meant to be
The only thing is I still feel there is no, perpetual bliss.
Just a life leading in the same path
Leading to nowhere, but everywhere
Wandering whether it’s me or not
Accepting me for me
But who am I?
Trapped in this vicious cycle
No one is looking but I feel them staring
I just want to hide
Hide away from it all
But I just can’t find the right way to do it
Slowly drifting into a world of false hope
Being comforted with words of love they say
But it’s not the same when these same words,
Are leaving these lips of mine
My body, mind … It’s hard to talk about it
I feel as though everything I’ve been told is a lie
They say don’t look into the light,
But I got blinded by the light
and ended up being wrapped in the most comforting wings
Sent from heaven above
I’m finally home

kenny Diamond Sep 29

you left me
My heart never stopped
But my mind playing back
The moments we had
You were my rock
And also my love
I am lost inside without

We care when our mind says not too
I wish i could  not let my feelings  get so deep
When i see  your face
Inside my soul  sends echo to my heart
I can't  help  but love you
You were only one that matter
I wish  i could been your king
But in end  i was just  a pawn in this game of love

kenny Diamond Sep 28

People  will laugh with   you then  stab you in back.  We  think they are  friends but all long they are wishing for  your downfall.  They use  your mistakes as bullets in a gun.  The sound of people talking behind  your back as  they smile to your  face.  It started  with hello but now it is time for  a goodbye.

I am sure many a fool has pondered
A question that asks
Nothing at all...
If you're busy doing nothing
Are you doing something afterall?

Sometimes, something
seems like nothing,
And what was nothing
Was really something in itself.

So remember,
Nothing is not nothing
It becomes something after all

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