“You should die
You shouldn’t cry.
You shouldn’t lie.
You should die.”

“You're not wanted anymore can’t you see?
You have zero friends and no parents
Your life isn’t good enough.
You have no reason to go on.”

“It’s funny how persistent you are.
Its weird that you are optimistic.
IT’S JUST NOT FAIR!!!
It's just not fair.”

It's not okay to be me.
It's not supposed to be easy.
It's not going to be better.
It's all downhill from here.

Why am i still here?
Why are you still reading this?
Why can’t i just leave already?
Why.
Why!
Why am i still here?



What am i trying to accomplish?
What is this thing called life?
What is your deal?
What is my deal?
What is anyone’s deal?

What if i wasn’t alive.
What if i died today?
What if all of us die?

I have nothing else to do.
I have nowhere else to go.
I have no one else to love.
I have no one at all.

I am alone. I am alone.
I’ve said so many times”I am alone?”
I have no will to live.
I have no motivation.

No will to live.No love.
No desire to move on.
No hope.No one.
No thing.No where to go.
No.
No!!
No!!!
No!!!!
No!!!!!
No!!!!!!
…..
…..
…..
Just. No.

it's another dark poem. i don't know what got over me. it isn't true to me but maybe to others.
if any of you got a good reading voice, please send a video of you , a friend, or anything with this poem.

I am left with so much pain
The  sadness  takes  over  like cancer that can t  be stopped
I wish  i had words  and power to make  it stop
There no password  or  sun shine
Just  the pain in my heart
As  i watch my life slowly  faded  away

Can you helo me?
Do  you have the key unlock
Or is my mind so far gone

I look as i am down on kness
Grab my chest as this sadness flows  through
I miss  your warm  hands  sound of hope in air

I scream break me free
I want rip my mask apart
Let   my pain be go
The words inside my head
This never  ending  song that needs  to end

Lure Pot Dec 6

You're breaking my heart
still then I am silent
You're making me tired
but I'm not worried
If you just feel like
I love you, sweetheart!

You don't care about me
but I still love you
You don't think of me
even then I miss you
If you just feel like
I'm there inside your heart!

I walk around and see you
if you ever look at me
I sing at midnight
if you ever listen to me
I'm doing well ‍so that I feel like
you're not falling apart.

If you ever feel like
I am not missing you
If you ever feel like
I am not crying for you
then you think about me
I am no more in this world
and just pray for my departed soul.

As we live our lives
Go through our everyday business
We see things happen
We see the good
We see the bad
We rejoice in the pleasure
But when it comes to the
Less pleasurable of things
We learn how to look the other way
Turn the cheek
Have a blind eye

We see things happen
We know what goes on
But instead of doing something
We turn away
Turn our backs
Pretend it is all okay

We act like we know nothing
Turn away
Put on a happy face
And go on to live another day

We pretend it's all okay
Think about how
Whatever is happening
Would happen either way
Whether we knew about it or not
It would continue
Because knowledge
Isn't a creator

We remember what it was like
Not to know
To give ourselves an excuse
Do we give it any more thought?
No

We are the human race
And we have mastered the art
Of turning our backs
Looking away
And giving a blind eye

Paul Jones Nov 26

thinking
thinking is
thinking is not
thinking is not what
                                    you
think it is
you think it is
but it is not
what is it not
                        you
but what are
                        you
if you are not
thinking
a
human
              being

you've been thinking

but if
            you
asked a thought
am i
          you
it would reply
                           no

i'm just passing through

Logos - 1 -
11:00 - 26/11/17

This is experimental but I'm working on a new structural form. It is not free verse and will have rules. It will be playful and rhythmic.  

This explore's 'thinking' but I will have to see if it works with other concepts. It seems like abstract words work well.
Yaser Nov 26

Welcome to the never
Here sit thoughts long abandoned
as they dance in their own weight
They sing songs of regret
as they call to their thinkers
but the thinkers have long since
passed them by
They are thoughts
never to be thought again
Still they call to their creators
but no hope is allowed to them
Not here -
not in the never.

when i'm with you we don't talk
about banal things, not really
we talk about zombie movies
and allegories for capitalism

in england we talk about the weather
all the fucking time. 'it's getting worse'
we say. 'all this rain, can you believe it?'
'i think it's the end of the fucking world'

do you think sentient robots would be depressed?
also i love you and the whole world is changing,
it's beginning to revolve around that point.
we are determined by where our attention is focused.

here someone asks you how you are
you have to say 'not too bad thanks, yourself?'
even when you're not. especially when you're not.
i experienced true happiness and created hell

do you think we have free will? i do,
you don't, but you feel the way that you do anyhow.
there's no free will but we're here. together
and you are happy, grateful. me too.

i'm not trying to be happy here,
i don't know if that's possible, the rain is acidic
i think it's the end of the fucking world
'it's the end of the fucking world'

i can't talk to you when i'm here, i'm not me when i'm here, i don't know who i am when i'm not with you but i don't like her.
i hate you for making me realise what i've been missing out on all this time
Simon Nov 22

You were standing at the top of that building
You were holding that knife against your wrist
You were sitting in a corner of your room
You were going to talk to her

What holds you back, pitiful brat?
"I'm scared, I'm scared! I'm not prepared!"
What holds you back, where's your faith at?
"I'm scared, I'm scared! I do not dare!"

You hopelessly started crying
You really wanted to talk to her
You pushed harder against your wrist
You walked further through the edge

What holds you back, pitiful brat?
"I'm scared, I'm scared! I'm not prepared!"
What holds you back, where's your faith at?
"I'm scared, I'm scared! I do not dare!"

You didn't talk to her
But you writed your last note
But your wrist started to bleed
But you jumped off the edge



Ha... Weren't you scared? I thought you didn't dare

Note: this poem is about something that i realised after doing some cutting. The fear i felt before doing it was the same that i felt when trying to expose myself to social interactions. I feel really stupid now that i think abou it
VS Nov 21

I've words to unthink

My nose on the brink

Nothing can stink

Like grandiose ink

Having fun! :) Inspired by my own hand, unfortunately! :)
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