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Brad post 38m
Sometimes I lie awake at night, unable to sleep, and my thoughts drift towards you.
Our first kiss, in what became “our” booth at “our” restaurant.
I was shy, scared to make the first move, scared of being rejected so my mouth ran away with itself, all the while my mind screaming at me to shut up.
I was looking into your eyes, thinking how beautiful they were, and rambling. Then, it happened. That click, that unmistakable sensation of tumblers falling into place somewhere inside of me as I watched you.
You kissed me.
It was electric, like a charge running through bare wire, and the world simply fell away. Nothing mattered except for your lips, and my hands in your hair, and the sweet sensation of those tumblers clicking into place.
I knew I loved you then.
I think about that, and then I wonder how it could have went so wrong. How could a moment, a feeling, as strong as that lead to this?
Love turning to bitterness, and hatred, and regret.
Then the dust settles, and it all boils away and the bad memories are the first to go. The memories of the fights, and the suspicions, and the stupid choices that were made.
Then you are left with the good memories, the memories that seem to cut you harder than anything else could because of the simplicity of them.
They are memories of the love, the looks, the trust, and they make you want to pick up your phone and send that simple “I’m sorry”....but you are too afraid.
That first kiss though, that was real. Those feelings were real, and that memory is worth the pain.
Our booth. Our restaurant.
Our love.
Terri 1h
To all the people I've annoyed
I'm sorry for being annoying
To all the time I wasted on people
I'm sorry for wasting them

Always asking if everyone's alright
But always the one being asked that
Always the one making everyone okay
But always not the one that's okay
Not also asked on how I'm feeling
But that's okay I understand
I'm nothing to everyone
No one gives a crap even
If you show them you're not okay
They wont ask
They wont notice
They wont care
They dont care.
Thanks friends for being liked that to me haha
I’m drunk and surfing dating sites,
what a terrible combination,
what the heck happened to us humans anyways,
it’s 2018 and I’m online looking for a date what a predicament,

online but outta line,
not inline but still finding the time to go offline,
on nature walks where Nature talks,
telling me that it’s not all about the money and the fame,

depressed as fck but I guess that’s a blessing,
gives me the motivation I need,
to write these lines inline with the divine,
so I guess that makes me one with The Divinity,

I’m drunk what the fck,
I don’t even usually drink,
but then again I often do,
things I don’t usually do jeez,

humans are such a strange species,

humans are such a strange species,
but we’ll all be dead in a 100 years anyways,
so who cares take a sip take a trip,
smoke a spliff and let yourself lift,

see they say the only way,
to find your self is to lose your self,
not sure what that means exactly,
but they say a lot of things so oh well,

oh well,
spilling my heart out online,
in my feelings feeling all emo,
can’t have a good time but Lord knows I’m trying,

can’t have a good time or keep it together,
and this constant state of deja vu keeps washing over me,
pouring myself drinks from a bottom of Kettle One,
that was left over from a girl that came over then left me,

but I can’t blame her I probably deserved it,
because I’m damaged goods anyways,
broken hearted so I break hearts,
she should’ve known better anyways,

what’s my point,
this isn’t a poem,
this is a warning,

stay the fck away from me,
let me die in peace,
leave me alone so I can write these words,
so that there’s something left in time when I leave,

going soon,
but until then,
I’ll write these words,
using a laptop instead of a pen,

because it’s 2018,
and everything is strange,
“When I was a kid we didn’t even have cell phones!”,
oh well holmes I guess I have aged,

I’m drunk and surfing dating sites,
what a terrible combination,
what the heck happened to us humans anyways,
it’s 2018 and I’m online looking for a date what a predicament…

∆ Aaron LaLux ∆
Alexis 8h
             Or else I'll fall for your smile
                          Or else I'll get used to the way the corners of your eyes
                          crinkle when you laugh at the lamest joke I could tell you
                        ­             Or else I'll find out that you hate tomatoes but spaghetti
                                      is one of your favorite foods
                                                 Or else it'll be embedded in my brain forever
                                                 that for some reason you hate the color yellow
                                                 and I'll never know why

              Or else my friends will start asking me where you've been after I
              invited you over to hang out for the first time
                           Or else we'll find "our spot" that I'll drive by every other day
                           and always remember how good that summer was

                                      Or else I'll show you one of my favorite songs that'll
                                      turn into one of your favorite songs and you'll thank
                                      me for it

                                                    Or else I'll hang up the pictures of us in my
                                                    room and every time I see them I'll smile and
                                                    be thankful I have you around


              Or else I'll love you

                         Or else I'll give so many pieces of myself to
                         help you
                                      Or else I'll think you feel the same way

                                                   Or else I'll think that you care

                            ­     S    T     A    Y           A    W    A     Y 
                               Or else you'll have a chance to leave me
It seems like I'm losing all my closest friends and I'm scared to get close to new people.
I am a wife
I am a mother

I am a daughter
I am a sister

I am a friend
I am a lover

I am all of these things
I feel so alone
Pink bubbles burst
In a strawberry pop
Underneath the sharp shade of the green leaves of her oak.

Fingers twirl blade
After blade in hand,
Until her nails blend with the grass.

Alone, she watches heat,
Swirl in ocean waves across the road.

Someone might come by tomorrow.
Dez 15h
Fear is a terrible friend
It stays by your side
There's never an end
You want to scream ,but your mouth is dry
Fear is a terrible friend
You want to believe you can live without it
But you lost the ability to defend
Fear is a terrible friend
You lost yourself to it
You don't have the strength to live without it
Fear is a terrible friend
It's a battle some of us face alone
When you say it out loud, most people cant comprehend
Fear is like a dog with a bone
It wants you buried and alone
Fear is a terrible friend
My vision, slowly losing focus,
the bright lights fading into
bright circles,
the world eventually fading away.

My hearing, drowning in the silence;
oddly enough, there's a
loud buzzing, screaming,
telling me to stop.

My breathing, quiet, sniffing every now and then,
the movement of rib bones going up and down,
the feeling of a knife tracing my chest,
the way it poked me and made my heart bleed.

My mind, my heart.
Filled with feelings, yet almost none left for myself.
I'll always love other people,
but there isn't enough for me anyway.

What's the whole point, then?
I'm about to lose it. As in, lose myself and probably going insane.

I am so close to giving up; I can't afford professional help, nor do I want to bother anyone by my negativity.

I'm a bother, anyway. I should just end myself.
Mae 16h
Yes, i have friends
...or do i?
you see, there is a difference between having friends
and having someone you eat your lunch with
...or is there?
no, no, no, let's not doubt ourselves
let's not overthink things
...or are we?
nonetheless, at least you have someone
it's better than having none at all
...or is it?
I'm lonely, aren't I?
i'm wasting my smiles, my stories, even probably my breath
with people who will never care
...or will they?
does this normally happen to anyone?
that even amidst a group of people
one could still feel very alone
that even when you knew them for sometime now
they still feel like strangers
...or is this just all in my head?
She lays down
in bed-sheets red and retreats into her mind
agonizing over answers to questions,
answers she will never find.
This isn’t the first time.

The sun and the moon waltz through the skies
watched through clouded eyes
the pair reminds her how alone she feels inside,
the disconnect that’s in her mind.
It won’t be the last time.

The wind batters her with rain
she is tired, broken… ashamed.
She doesn’t know your name and you don’t know hers,
it’s time for that to change. Loneliness is the bastion of the mind,
don’t look for answers you will never find.
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