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You were another
abandoned city I had lost in.
Another ghost town of
dreadful memories,
A cemetery of a deceased love
and unfulfilled promises.

You were a book that
hanged the reader on
the ****** of the story,
where the characters themselves
seemed confused of the plot
until a blizzard blew the pages off
and burned them into ashes.

You were that line in a poetry
the poet is bewildered
whether to put a comma on
or make it a full stop,
so he just left you in
enjambment, instead.

You were an unfinished
sentence of someone else's
fairy tale.

And I am terrified
that one day,
the author will come to his mind
and continue to write.
I am scared that the courage I took
to walk inside that spooky place
of lovers who were once in loved
will put into sorrow
and will leave me
a ghost town too.

I am afraid that she will
show up in the next chapter
to win you back
and I cannot make you stay
because,

what else a new love can do
to win over the first one?—
Who made the most of you.

—Apbrooke
This is the First Poem of my Anthology.
Eyithen 2d
I've come to realize that social media does more harm then good for me.
It makes me covet and envy,
It makes me feel sad and hollow,
I makes me yearn...and wish...and cry,
It's all a mask.
Nobody shows the person that hides in the shadows of the corners of their soul.
And yet It still manages to infect and feed off my fears and insecurities.
So I do what I'm good at.I ignore it and pretend it doesn't exist.
Nicole Oct 4
Dressings
Of insecurities hang
As drapes around
The room of my heart,
Heavy and suffocating.
And yet there is a housekeeper
In the early morning
Who is pesky and uptight,
Dusting them off
And opening the curtains
Saying
"Remember
To dance even on
Gloomy days."
i feel very alone in these moments
where i don't know who to talk to,
don't know who's ready for me
or if there's anyone at all who is

times like these make me feel as though
i can help but not be helped and
i shouldn't complain, i'm not lonely
but i'm just feeling so lo

i tell my friends it's just my meds,
the dose just isn't quite right
but what if it's not? what if it's me
and my fear of vulnerability?

please, i don't want you to go
like all the others who came before
listened to me talk, answer their questions
then turned their back on us

i guess the weight of my problems
is part of the cause; i'll never cut
down to the root, because the mass
just sinks it further

and i guess the weight is part of the cause
they choose to sink or swim,
and away they go, fleeing fast
as i tread the water, breathing shallow
Mrs Robota Sep 20
How are you?
I don't know...
                                                     Are you okay?

I don't know...
                             please, i'm worried
                             say something?

i'll break my own heart
i promise i'll let you go
if you need to leave
i'll break my own heart
i promise i'll let you go

I don’t feel like myself
                    
            Who do you feel like?
I keep letting you down                        
           You know best
I never wanted to let you down
                                                 what you understand
                                                 what you don't.
                                                          ­                  You have to choose
                                                 what you want to do about it.

I don’t know......

                                           Leave anxiety aside
                                 what do you want to do with your life?


i'll break my own heart
i promise i'll let you go
if you need to leave
i'll break my own heart
i promise i'll let you go

                                          i think you hate yourself
                         i understand, i hate myself too
                                   but you have to stop hating yourself. 
                           you spend so much energy on it it's absurd

I'm worried that you'd take such ******* seriously and get hurt…


Why?

self pity and self hatred are pointless.

I got a thirst I can't quench

                                  No matter how much I swallow

I got a thirst I can't satisfy

Please don't leave me
Please don't go
Please don't leave me
Shruti Atri Aug 29
We walked hand in hand today
We walked carefully, not touching

We laughed and cried together, baring our souls
We rarely spoke, exchanging silent glances

We didn't inch apart, growing closer and closer
We felt achingly closer, though apart

We met each other, one on one
No matter our company, I could only see you
A strange Eclipse of happiness
Shruti Atri Aug 29
I wonder where
Have my words gone

Falling short of thoughts
Struggling to find something to say
I achingly try to articulate
Stopping mid sentence--

I miss the poems
The ballads, the prose
The words that flew
From pain, from joy
To sorrowful dark and light jest

I fear I will lose myself
Soon enough...

Will you still speak to me--
Will anyone still speak of me--
When I have nothing to say?
When I have nothing to give?
From a scary place
idunnome Aug 13
i want to solve Your problems but
my love can only change so much
my support can only validate so much
my humor can only ease so much
my pride can only deliver so much
and my insecurities interfere so much..
Unknowingly, I taught myself
To behave on how others treated me
Constantly, being the good child
Just made life easier to breathe

I thought that if I behaved
It would make it easier to love me
Inevitably, I had neglected
Many of my wants, hopes and needs

I still think needs are only desires
And desires are luxuries
So I am left with a tired soul
That is in dire need of me

I tend to give more compassion
And acceptance towards everyone else
Though, when I take a look inwards
I cannot give it to myself

I look at my loved ones' flaws
And think there is more to love
Yet, when I confront my own faults
I conclude that I am not enough

I put myself to such a high standard
While giving myself no steps to use
I try my best to attain and fall
Then berating every mistake I do

For so long, I've been my worst enemy
Trying to tune out my own voice
All the conflicted yelling and screaming
I just desperately tried to avoid

Except, disregarding my inner voice
Overlooks her out as well
I am left confused and lost
Wondering what created this hell

My inner voice who sings
A voice so smooth, it soothes
The cracks and scars I've accumulated
From years of self-abuse

The gentle, quiet voice inside me
She, who understands and adores
Who only wishes what is best for me
Is a girl worth trying for

I will try to believe more often
That I am more than enough
The care that I keep searching for
Can be made from my own love
alskawlfe Aug 2
here I am at the edge of this apology
one tap from calling you and telling you how much I miss you.
how my hands are shaky, blocked by my own insecurities
here i am at the bottom of this ***** bottle
tired of being sober
tired of not seeing you
tired of the fact that I let you go
how many times do I have to tell myslef I'll be over you soon
how many prayers do I have to make
my knees are bleeding and my hands are numb
but nothing compares to this ache in my chest
how many nights do I have to miss before i can forget the way you say my name
the way you held my hand,
the way your eyes shudder,
when you held me the first time
our first kiss
i never let any man touch me after you
for I'm afraid that they'll brush your scent off my skin,  
here I am at this cliff where i put you
so high
say it on a loop, like a broken record
I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry
that my insecurities put us here
that my baggage are just too heavy for you to carry
I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry
I've been trying to shut this devil in my head
but my flaws blinds me ,
I could only see my scars and I am ashamed , terrified that you'll look away
this skeleton in my closet is my reflection
you don't deserve this bundle of insecurity
I don't deserve you.
I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry
here I am in our favorite place,
coffee cold for the only warmth I want is off your body
here I am at this end of this poetry,
knees on the floor, hands still praying, heart still aching
here I am still,
still so in love with you
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