Help me I'm falling
Closing in to your heart
Bewitched by your charms
Chasing you in my dreams
I'm in a freefall
Diving to your core
Caught by your gravity
Bracing for impact
No brakes this time
Falling a hundred miles per hour
Faster than the speed of sound
Momentum too strong
I want more by the second
More of your girlish charms
More of your gleaming smiles
and your piercing eyes
I'm in a free fall
Diving into more of you
Closing in on your core
Trying to make you mine
I know its wrong
I know I stand no chance
But every time I close my eyes
Your face replays on my mind
And I can't help but dream
Dreaming of holding you in my arms
So even though they say its wrong
It feels more than right for me
They tell me to go somewhere else
But my compass leads me to you
No matter who they choose for me
I still want to be yours and choose you
Like a child on the run
Going to where he desires
I can't help but want to fall
Fall for someone who makes me smile
Help me I'm falling
Falling for the dreams of my heart
Let me make the dreams of yours
A reality we both play a part
I'm sorry I'm so fucked up and
Overall just complicated
I know my feelings
But sometimes I don't feel them
And that's terrifying
I know they're there but
They get shoved under
By the waves of anxiety and fear
I want to give you everything
But I don't know what that means
I get trapped within myself
And it feels like I can't breathe
These thoughts thrash through my mind
Tearing up everything they touch but
I love you entirely
And I don't want this darkness to touch you
So I'll probably always question
Why you make the active choice to be with me
I'll never understand
How someone as amazing as you
Could ever love someone this broken
For that, I am the luckiest person
Because you do love me
And you're with me
And you're the most loving and supportive person I know
And you remind me constantly
As exhausting as that might be
So thank you for being you
And for being here
I love you
I just had the best conversation
I think I have ever had in my life
And told me so many things
And I told her so many things
We talked about everything
It felt so right
Or hurtful words
Just two people
And letting each other be heard
It might not sound like much
But with my family such grace is nonexistent
Is nowhere to be found all my sibling's conversations always ends in insane screaming matches
It is warm
Here we listen to understand
Not just to respond
I hugged her
I love feeling accomplished
Like we're getting somewhere
I love speaking with respect
I love getting to know her
im standing, barely
trying to see what's around me
im crying but no one can hear,
people throw their advice at me and it hits hard like ice against my skin
and all i want is for someone to
to really listen
they keep giving me words i did not ask for
we love you, we’re here for you
keep it; give it up
life is hard; welcome to adult life
i open up to you
but it’s still not enough
you’re the one who sees me cry;
my tears are hidden by my smiles
to everyone else
you’re the one who knows my pain;
my laugh hides the torment
from the outsiders
here i am, standing,
wishing you knew
that i have given you
all there is to give.
I miss sleep.
I miss the peace that comes with it.
Erasing the day.
Running rapid in the world of my subconscious.
Those days seem so far away.
I find myself running on empty.
On pure fumes.
My thoughts are endless.
Bringing me to the cliffs of mania.
All my wants, needs, goals and things I want to accomplish keep me up until the sun peeks through my window pane.
I'm swimming in my own pool of exhaustion because my success hangs at my finger tips.
I find myself unable to shut it off.
The passion, and determination that fuels me to wake up everyday.
I am simply put, tired of running inside my head 24/7.
I want to slow down.
But my need to succeed wins again.
Overpowering my need to slow things down.
I wish you knew what it felt like to walk into a room, notice every color of every detail on every wall.
To hear every sound, even the unnoticeable fly that circles round.
The endless chatter of passing people.
The entrance doors that squeak when you walk through the door.
Knowing every exit to every room.
It drives me crazy to notice so much.
If only for just a moment I knew how to quiet the mind and drown out the sound.
The sound of life all around me..
And how crazy this all sounds.
From being a sapling
We experience many storms
We grow, we flourish
We wilt, we may grow thorns
As we begin to sprout
We face more danger
We are picked, broken, and chopped
Protesting at our trials in anger
We thrash about
Being struck at the roots
Trying and trying
But the mud won't let us loose
As we grow
We get better, we become stronger
While we will eventually wither
We are now beginning to blossom
I walk down the lane of misery for the last time this year
Reminiscing my failures
I watch my hard work float away like my lovers who promised to stay.
The self-doubt however lingers
The confidence diminishing like the seconds to a new year
The new year of little significance
For we all know we will never change
We will face the same doubts
We will cry for the same reason
We will fight the same battle
and we will never learn
Not this time, not this year, not this new year