O, brother of blood!
My born bud.
Fate has brought us close,
Even though this isn’t what I chose.

Pointy tongues and snickering smirks,
The rude comments and the other works
Are way too common for me.
Let me show you what I see!

I see a boy who has been robbed.
Someone who’s right was mobbed.
His right to choose,
Whose love is whose.

Just because the same river flows within
Doesn’t mean I’ll be there when
Your call reaches my weary ears.
Each letter of your name draws tears,
Even after all these long years.

Svode 6h

To everyone who has spurn,
to every hater who has made me learn,
to every despot who in hell will burn,
thank you.

To my desires, which I yearn,
to the men and women who barely earn,
to everyone whose lives have taken a downturn,
thank you.

For persisting in night and day,
for keeping this land free, I have to say,
that life isn't fair, you will sometimes go astray,
but the best thing to do is to work and stay.

Yeah, driving through the city, and you all up in my mind, babe.
Looking at our past , trying to leave it all behind, babe.
You got me thinking about all of my mishaps
And hate to admit it
But your smile
Yeah, I miss that.
I thought you knew, but you didn’t know
All this constant fighting got me feeling real low
Even when I’m high

And now it’s just back to me, myself, and I again
Thought I was used to it
But I guess I ain’t
Sitting here
Reminiscing back, to the both of us laughing
Talking on the phone for hours, and our jokes were a classic
Talking about the future like, damn that could happen
But it couldn’t, not one in a million

Going through my phone, deleting pictures of the times that we had
Thinking to the moments that I’d probably take back
You’re someone I wish that I always could have.
But lately
I’ve been so scared
Whenever people come out and tell me that they care
Cause when I really need them, they never been there
And I know that sometimes, life ain’t fair
That’s just how I feel

But if you got somebody, that makes you happier than I ever did.
Let me tell you, that’s that’s fine, babe
I ain’t really been the one, babe
And you never really been my babe.
My babe.

Why are some days harder than others.
Why is it that today of all days it got a little harder?
Why of all days did I think about you and cry a little harder?

Maybe it's because I finally see you for who you really are.
Maybe its because I finally realize everything you said, did and felt was an out right absolute lie.
Maybe its because I finally realized no matter what moments we had shared together and no matter how special I thought they were...they actually weren't...

If you asked me what killed me more... I wouldn't have an answer.

How the fuck do you tell yourself it wasen't real?
How do you tell your heart..
It was all a lie?
The love was all just onesided?
How do you tell yourself you have to forget?
You have to move on?
That even though your heart might be breaking....
His isn't...

Love has cursed me...
And so have you.

I'm glad you can walk this earth without feeling anything.
Never loving anyone.
Never feeling the excruciating pain of a broken heart.
The kind that  paralyzes you.
The kind that leaves a permanent mark on your heart.

I fucking hate it.

Weird day.

hate you now.
but i don't have the energy.

Se baño en lagrimas
La mujer que marco en mi
Los demonios que cargo.
La primera, ella fue,
La que no he podido sacar
De aquella tarde de octubre.
Cuando el odio contamino mi sangre
Expulsando fuego en unos textos
Palabras de las que quizas me arrepiento
Pero dolor el que me ahorre...
Soledad con la que tropecé...

I am not who I seem
I am not a good thing
I am million broken pieces
I am an empty evil thing
I am a wall built around myself
I am protecting the things hidden
I have a million different masks
To hid a thousand fears
I have buried so deep
I will never find myself
I am not who I seem
I am not a good thing
I am a million broken pieces
Of a boy never seen

Brianna 2d

I felt slightly uneasy and slightly confused.
I was disorientated and I couldn't figure out how to stand straight.
The empathy in the room was gone.
It was filled with soulless creatures I once called friends.

The devil danced on my back and I found myself watching all the people I once loved turning into people I wanted to destroy.
Little things set me off and my patience was thinner then paper.
I could see through the looking glass- my memories were just over the rabbit hole and beyond.

Instead, I slipped farther down and down into the core of the earth until the darkness took control.
I could feel the heat- the rising of anger and jealousy that kept me from being happy for them.
I hated them.
I wanted them out of my life.

But I kept them around to help fuel the fire that was keeping me alive.
I kept them there so when I went to bed lonely and sad - least I was warmed by bitterness.
I kept them so when the envious monster of jealously came pouring down my throat-- least I wouldn't be thirsty for something I knew I'd never have.

It doesn't take one thing to send you into the pessimistic oblivion you call life- it takes an avalanche.
It takes a hurricane of pain and sadness.
It takes a tornado of loneliness and pity.
It took a massive earthquake of people telling you over and over again things were going to be okay.

The devil is dancing on my shoulders again, and he's threatening me with the idea that if I just give up now- maybe I won't be alone forever.
That the ghost's and demons will keep me company.
That the memories will be enough to hold me over.

Maybe I'll let him win, maybe I won't.
Maybe someone will help me out of this mess I call life...
or Maybe they won't.

Cameron 2d

Long ago, there was a butterfly,
Its membrane wings, thin plastic,
Its precious lifeblood, oil.
Humming from flower to flower,
It never strayed from chartered paths.
Proboscis feeding, but never tasting,
Body consuming, but never growing.

Long ago, there was a butterfly,
Its brain, a mother board,
Its memory, four hundred and ten megabytes.
Sucking up all the nectar,
It never imagined the damage it would do.
Sensors scanning, but never seeing,
Motors whirring, but never beating.

Long ago, there was a butterfly,
Its cold limbs, now crippled,
Its power, all run out.
Collecting dust on a barren field,
The butterfly never lived, and so it never died.
It moved, but never thought,
It flew, but was never free.

I was dumb enough to think
That an intimate relationship......
A marriage was the remedy
For my disconnection.
I shouldn't blame my ex-wife
For the failure of the marriage.
Relationships are caught up in all sorts of broader Realities.
That's why I can't really blame people
For just wanting to enjoy
Casual sex,
But I do blame President Donald Trump
And the Christian Right
For being Moralists.
Is the GOVERNMENT supporting
These "families" that they supposedly
Want people to have?
Hell no!
The Current Administration is making it
Harder and harder
For families to survive.
They aren't just targetting
Muslims, Transsexuals
And Immigrants from Latin America or Haiti.
These "Christians"
Want to take away a woman's right to birth control.
But make it easier
For mentally ill people
To obtain firearms.
It seems as if men are actually being ENCOURAGED
To go on murderous rampages
Rather than to enjoy sex.
It's no surprise any more
When people simply get blown away
For no logical reason at all.

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