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Throw ourselves into darkness,
Trust that we'll end up in the light,

In a land,
where blood from the bullet holes in our head turn to confetti,
and faded smiles are replaced with a temporary burst of joy.

Into the Rabbit Hole we go,
another escape, a way out,
even if we know it won't last.

Our wildest fantasies turn to reality and
reality fades to nothing but a dream.

Our scars dissipate,
replaced with sparkling images of strength,

Our fears morph into our best friends.

You reach a new level of euphoria,
a new form of happiness,
never before experienced.

It can't end,
you won't let it,

just let go,
Wonderland can last Forever.
Fake Things

We live in a world
Of fake things

Fake Products
Fake News
Fake Calls
Fake Politics
Fake Sports
Fake Business
Fake Leaders
Fake People
Fake friends
Fake sincerity

Surrounded 24/7
By all the fake things
How can anything real exist?

Is it all nothing but fake things
Designed to deceive us all?
note:  will be published in Foliate Oak Review.  I just updated my blog, the world according to cosmos with a lot of fresh content.  Go to to check it out
To my heart you once held the key,
Trusted you I wholly did,
But you left me in tears and only with my plea,
This tragedy should be hid.

Love is a simple little thing,
We made a game out of it,
Who will be the first to sing,
Their tragic split.

Shotgun aimed at hearts,
Mine was the one to be hit,
The bullet broke it in million parts,
Leaving me with just one bit.

I didn’t smell the gunpowder,
Nor did I notice the scent of fresh burning blood,
I just screamed louder,
Hoping to be heard in that mud.

My mind went blank,
Analyzing this wound,
To it I should thank,
For now to love I am bound.
Clumsy mistakes and words fake,
Those were the fragments of your world.
The earth underneath my legs shakes,
My whole body twirls,
From the unbearable ache.

You spoke of honesty and liberty,
Yet you chained my soul and fed it with lies,
In this captivity,
All I see are your cold eyes.

You’re no man,
But a cruel monster,
I tried to run,
Your grip I couldn’t conquer.

You may be strong,
But my will won’t be killed,
Your tongue, serpent long,
Will never be that skilled.
b 5d
the guilt
the sin
the hatred within

thinking if we disguise our hair
in an obscure form of veil
they will conceal our madness

thinking if our skin prevails
after years of stacking knitwear
they will shred our sadness

then asking us why are we so vain?
why do we masquerade our emotions to keep us sane?
when all your attempts strives to conceal what’s underneath
underneath that cloth you call a veil
underneath that skin you use for sale

the morals
the virtues
the lies you preach

It is just another mask you wish to keep
Heathen cat,
Atop my Mac.
You’re feral
And losing teeth.
A fever from your scratch,
A heap of furry black.
Flicks his tail and tongue to greet me.
Meet me
In the chatroom.
A real cat-fish
I presume,
The squawk box amuses me.
Yellow eyes and painted ears,
He types away at all his fears.
I fell in love with a stranger;
A true online catfish he’d been
For years.
They say I give to much, and take too little.
I don’t see it that way.
I want love so I give love and yes expect it in return.
But no matter how hard I’ve tried, I’m
always left behind.
Chasing paper,plastic, and silicone.

I’ll still wait for love, even if it never comes.
I don’t deserve picture perfect.
**** it.
I want your flaws and your struggles too.
To them your worthless, to me you want less, which means your worth it.
I’m not obsessed just lonely.
Can you feel the power coursing through you,
disguised as adrenaline,
when you swing your arm and before the blow even hits,
you feel all your anger and frustration fade, so now all you want is to fight?
You wanna kick and pitch a fit,
till your old ****** arms
are covered up by new scars,
but nothing like that matters because you're the last man standing.
Maybe the other boy, curled up on the ground now
with his arms thrown over his head,
broke your nose and made it even more crooked than before,
but you're the little freak who no one thought could win.
But you entered in
from a world where everyone called you ****
to be the freak who everyone only saw as a ****,
thin-shouldered and quieter than the boys he fought.

Maybe your quietness and meek, weak, malnourished look fooled you and all of them,
for look into your eyes in the mirror and see the gold and brown fighting through the green sheen,
the fire for everything you hate, all the things you're hitting and spitting on when you're through with them,
and when you stare into your own eyes you might recognize yourself.

Don't be fooled, boy, you're weak and you're sick,
your arms aren't thick
which muscle and dark hair,
and nothing about you is real,
with fabricated reactions and premeditated sentences,
all programmed into your brain, which fights itself in its confusion,
screaming, and smoking from the fight with itself, about what should be happening with your emptiness and with your bony chest.

Boy, you're hardly that,
just a *** who stares after the other guys,
but you're not sure if you're ***, because you really just want to be just like them.
Boy, at least you fall for pretty girls,
shorter and daintier than you, with more mellow hearts but stronger emotions,
and passions for poetry (not the kind you possess, rooted in your inability for expressions)
and always with love for another boy, a real boy to grow into a man.
2242 jan 15 2019

my mom and oldest sister like hate men but here i am, wanting desperately to grow into a man... this is addressed to myself 'cause i'm a freak to almost everyone and a large amount of people 'round here don't like jews like me.
Sara Kellie Jan 15
If prevention is better than the cure
(up the sentence for intimidation)
to much, much, much, much more.
Let me search my mind.
See what feelings I can find.

These thoughts I have
were never mine.
You gave me these.
Did I wrong you somehow?
Was it for your friends to please?
How many likes did you get?

  (black cloth on my head)
For the pain you imposed.
for you,
I have been whispering with the
jury of the (******) self righteous mind
and so,
your sentence,
will take your breath away.

Justice served by any person other than yourself is and always will be empty.
Wolf Jan 14
The thought that you
Would harm me so
Had never crossed my mind
For I was utterly obsessed

Revolved around you
Oh how I craved it all

But still, I fell
And you caught me
With love growing less
My pain growing worse

Soon my eyes were opened
Blind no longer
To my actions
So I waited for your return

The words which followed
I did not fear
You loved me, you loved me

Leaving for uncertainty
All reasons stayed valid to me
My hope still stood
Just for you

But there was a single sentence
Not another girl
Not turmoil between parents
Not collapsing grades

You simply wanted to leave
"Difficult and unstable," you spat at me
My dearest friend
Whom I fell in love with


My insides churned
Words flew onto the screen
I cursed him
Wept until breath refused to flow

The last words I received
From my future, my place of joy
I don't care.
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