You are at peace now that I know.
My head knows all the reasons but the grief still won't let me go.
My love for you knows no bounds even now, I look at the stars and I see you somehow.
Am i too afraid of when my heart starts to heal that your death will become all too real.
The grief when it gives me a reprieve, will it still be just as hard to breathe.
Without your love I feel nothing but this pain in my heart and soul.
Please can we just go back to the start when I still had all the pieces of my heart
LinaM 3d
I dream of worlds of smiles and laughter
I dream of worlds of love and kindness.
But some days, my world's are gone.
Gone like my laughter.
Gone with my love.
Why are some refused the rights to dream?
To believe.
To see.
To laugh.
To cry.
I guess now I see why,
Dreaming is all just lies.
Inheriting independence
Intruding boundaries
You let your actions stem
from insecurity and jealousy
You want to protect me
But now I feel,
I need protection from you.

You’re taking my life and air;
Choking
Caging  
Suffocating
And Stifling me.

Love me
Don’t own me.
Protect me,
But don’t bound me.

You’re being possessive
That it turns out obsessive
And sometimes situations get aggressive.

Fire burns in your love
But your intentions become impure.
In becoming possessive
You became invasive.

You try to move my blood to your accord.
Try to be the nerve to my muscle.
But you’re blinding my eyes with tears
And leaving myself internally screaming.
It is like a curse that brings problems without a cause.

I want to b r e a t h e  
I want to s c r e a m  
I want to f l e e  

I wonder,
Where did all the happiness go?
Because I just find myself lamenting
over the days that pass by.

- Beautiful Sensitive Soul
“I can’t  b  r  e  a  t  h  e.  You’re trying to sheathe me from the world. But I just want  to scream and flee. I want to leave, I want to escape. I don’t want to be bounded, I don’t want to be caged. But your muscles are possessive, hands like shackles and ribs encasing and engaging. Your scent clings to my finger and your embracement breaks my bones. Your words make decisions for me, exerting boundaries onto me. You’re stifling my breath and suffocating me. You want my blood to move at your accord. But I am drowning, choking and gasping. You’re pushing me away by entitling me. Your possessiveness knows no limits as you become invasive. You say it’s just because you love me, that you would go beyond any limit; but it’s obsessive. I feel like I am on a leash. I am no longer my own person, but a puppet to my master. A land to your dominian.”

- Beautiful Sensitive Soul
you are going to die
that is a fact.
you will cease to breathe
you will become forgotten
it is unlikely that any of us will leave a legacy

we think it's far away
we have plenty of time left
why worry?
well,
have you ever talked to a dying person?
I mean someone who is literally on their death bed
they are facing the end of their life
they've always known that they are going to die
but when it comes to actually dying they're terrified
there's always too much left unsaid
they weren't spontaneous enough
or didn't do what they really wanted

they thought they had more time

so next time you aren't feeling brave
or hesitate before doing something you wanna do
just know
death is imminent
unavoidable
nothing you do really matters that much
in 1000 years no one will remember it
so go for it.

laugh as much as possible.
cry when you need to cry.
forgive and forget.
go get what you want.
don't be embarrassed by anything.
life is too god damn short
to not be brave
to hesitate
to not take that big step
or to even just say hi
for my uncle who passed too early, it reminded me to be mindful of  the decisions I make and to live my life while I can. XX
Dont want to breathe
Dont want to move
Dont want to cry
Dont want to die

I dont know what i want
But its not this

This feeling of emptiness
And dead weight in my chest
In my head
In my legs

Everythings fading
My chest hurts
Should probably take a breath
It should help
But it’ll come back later
It always does

I can breathe later
I exhaled, inhaled and held the air.
Did this seven times as a pair.
Attempting to calm the mind.
To think logically and kind.
Now quiet, I begin some plans.
To cheer as all the same fans.
If you think about it, it’s ironic.
You don’t have to be smart or iconic.
It begins with pride in your community.
To clean up some trash with unity.
You may ask the question, "Why?"
Possibly some pride for my last goodbye.
To hold a standard for the earth.
To give every child an equal chance at birth.
A dark hour,
In a endless shore
With a fixed expression
And a fixed emotions
No veins, No breathe
Defying Sci-Fi fantasy
All of sudden,
Penetrating a silence
A smile,
A sweet dream,
A presence,
A cadence radiant
Taking a deep breathe,
Cold stones,
A source of decency
Fuel of Inspiration
Here a free verse, never gets ended
Just continue to inspire
Genre: Abstract
Shared from my Anthology, Canvas: Echoes and Reflections, 2018.
idk 5d
I stopped writing.
Not because I fell out of love with it...
My emotions just seemed to disappear.

I started a new medication.
The doctor said it would help my panic disorder, and it did.
I took that pill, like my mother talks to God (every morning).

When I went back to the doctor she said we had to up the dosage because apparently having 2 panic attacks a week still isn't okay.
I told her that when I woke up this morning I got out of bed without crying, but she didn't consider that as much of a victory as I did.

When I was put on a higher dosage, my emotions shut down.
After a few weeks I stopped crying, my OCD got better, my panic attacks were gone, and I could even go into the student union of my college campus without my heart trying to win a race against my thoughts.

I could breathe.

But, I also stopped having fun.
I felt like a stranger in my own body.
My emotions found the exit on the plane and jumped, never to be found again.

Since when did being able to breathe require me to feel like this?
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