She knew he would cheat on her
As she placed her heart in his hands
Hoping he would hold it together
Hoping he would make their love greater
The more he kissed his next victim
The less he remembered her
Forgetting his vows
While infedlity became his reality
Comforting his soul which became empty
He risked it all, as she watched him fall in infidelity
I swallow hard
I can see it move down my throat
The slender curve of my neck scarred
The memory fights to stay afloat
It claws it's way back up and in.
It's scent tearing at my skin.
For a moment I hate her.
The girl standing before me,
I hate her for giving up,
I hate her for giving in
I hate her for not being stronger
For letting her weakness win.
But I can't keep breaking mirrors,
and hating reflections.
No good can come from hating what others have done.
She fought, she screamed, and cried.
I f**king tried.
I can't be a slave to yesterday and my thickening pride.
I followed a dream over the horizon.
Swam in the dark side of the moon.
Felt pleasure, love, and freedom on the other side of that dune.
But I only hold the reins to myself
I cannot control them, or him.
It's just me, overflowing, and full to the brim.
Then she stands tall, her slender neck strong, a deep breath drawn.
And strength brings color back to her cheeks.
The hatred, and memories gone, placed firmly in the past.
And I recognize myself again at last.
so much blood leaked into
as you took apart the
pieces in my head.
i don't know when it started:
but i was four, maybe
the first time i remember
you taking a big chunk out of me:
i was sweet, rosy red,
and stuffed in a dress,
and you were black,
a pale shadow in
dark clothing as you grabbed
my legs when i tried to run....
and did again,
from then on out.
seated on a couch each time,
i felt as though
my eye bags
touched the floor
every second and all i really
was for you not to be angry...
i hate that stupid couch.
i lied so many times.
You lied, love
In two years I will have known you
For half of my short life
I wanted to spend the rest of it with you
Give you my part of this world
Sleep on your chest
Hold your hand in grocery stores
Take your picture in the afternoon sunlight
Drink coffee with you too late in the evenings
So I could stay up with you all night
You could've picked the colour of our front room
Helped me drip paint all over the floor
I gave myself to you
In the quietest ways
I thought of you to fall asleep
Looked for you when I woke up
I waited endlessly for you to arrive
To come back
For something, anything to show that you hadn't disappeared
I mourned for you
Cried real years at the loss of our imaginary world
I've wished you eight Merry Christmas's
Carried you with me into the New Year
Missed you for more minutes than I've loved you
But for what?
I've got nothing to show
You're starting a new life
And so am I
Me with him
You with her
We could've had it together
You lied, love
I have a story
The reason we died
With smile and agony
And no peace can keep us
I thought it was a parade
Amused, then amaze the mind
Fulfill the dreams we had
Enchanted our sleepy eyes
The melody like a spell, so dazzle
It's just a dellusion
They tear the tree of dream
Fading our imagination
Pour our land with beautiful agony
They don't care cause they don't hear
Don't, don't ever have a hope
Don't ever have a dream, they said
That's why we here
With smile and agony
So he wanted this
So he thought this was it
So he thought that this was going to be the last
So where is this coming from so how many times has he lied
So how many times has he told me he loved me
So how many times did he actually mean it
So how long is he going to give me the silent treatment
So how many times will he confront my friends instead of me
So what do I do now, I'm so confused.
Remember that guy,
Yea the one who I said made me feel all this love inside;
Well he fucking lied,
He played with my mind,
I should of known after seeing several bad signs;
Never did I ever think he would or could do that to me,
He fucking cheating on me,
He thought I wouldn't see;
I'm too smart to not have found out,
He thought I would believe his words without a doubt?
"You thought you could pull one over me honey?"
Nah my intuition
is far beyond his cognition;
So I got up the fuck and did better,
To not value me is something I won't except, never;
So fuck his love,
Fuck all those fake hugs;
They mean nothing now,
What he did to me was fucking foul;
I have no losses,
because in this situation I was faultless;
I just hope I'm not having his baby,
Because to have two bitches pregnant now thats crazy;
It's too bad
he lost the best life he could of had;
As for me I'm unbreakable,
And he's now erasable.