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In the midst of our passion,
I tried to make you show your hand.
You were losing your poker face,
I thought your inhibitions were gone.

But when I said “tell me what you want”
You replied “for you to be happy and healthy”.

And that shattered the dam.
The wall that held back the sea splintered.
And I let you see me drown in my pain.

I told you how letting you gorge on me
Made me the kind of sad I could control.
It was a shallow kind of sad, one that could be fixed with scotch tape.
I ripped the adhesive off  of the shallow sad
When the deep dark sad became too much.

I told you how letting you gorge on me
Made me feel useful, even if it validated everything he told me.
I don’t care that my body is nothing more than something to be ******,
At least I’m doing my friend a favor.

So even if I can’t be happy and healthy right now,
And even if you know that,
At least we can see each other for what we are
As I let you feed his desires for me,
And you let me feed my desire for pain.
Anger brings out a side of people
Perhaps one that hasn’t been seen
But then again it’s useful
It makes the slate start clean

I have a motto now
I’ll live each day for me
I’m done trying to satisfy the thirsty man
And portraying what he wants me to be

Let’s be honest I should’ve seen this coming
After all he wasn’t mine
But God it shouldn’t of hurt like this
And I shouldn’t be silently crying
Jack Red Jan 9
She powers on forward
Manipulated
Controlled
Victimised
Pressured
Depressed
Tor­n
Twisted
Split
Thoughtless
Irresponsible.
She's okay. Her friendly superman will clean the mess
Today
Tomorrow
Forever... She thinks.
The brief summary of the life of my friend over the past 3 months.
You get to a point where you stop, and think to yourself "Why is it always my shoulder? Why do I have to deal with the fallout? I need to start looking out for myself."
The Toxic Bitch Dec 2018
Why
Why do I feel like
Something is missing
Like you were supposed
To be here
But you're not
You were never here
Anyway
So why
Why do I miss you
Why do I wake up
Everyday
Feeling empty
Missing your touch
My body is used to you
More than my heart
Which is why
It's the only thing aching
I wish you here
And I don't even know
Why do I want that
Why do I feel like that
-Y.H
.23.Sept.2018.
Destyni H Jan 2
I don’t love you.
I honestly never really cared.
I couldn’t care less.

That is until 10:16
When my body aches
And I hit you with the wyd
Because you’re what I want to taste

Don’t expect me to embrace you in your vulnerability
But I expect you to embark in your most vulnerable experience with me

Why?

Because we’re humans, baby
Because it’s natural, lover
Because your body looked so good in that dress
Because of the shape your hips and your thighs
Oh I love when you ride

I love when you taste me
Can you feel me inside
I’m giving it all to you
Promise me it’s mine

Because this belongs to you

Wait but not completely
I can only promise you the D
Because I need no emotional ties between you and me

I’m in a situation
I have someone else for that
Someone who’s still waiting for me to text her back
Someone you don’t know of and you’ll hopefully never meet

And after this I probably won’t call
until 10:16 next week.
Calliope Dec 2018
My heart is held in the hands of people who like to break things.
Chaos is their default, and
everything is my fault.
Why do the broken always find me?

They think I am a mirror, but I am a window.
Not fractured like them, but convient and translucent.
They keep their hands firm against my cold surface and stare through me while they continue to look for something.

My mosaic is just not for them.
Masha Yurkevich Dec 2018
Sometimes
used
is better
than
new.
Contoured Dec 2018
I want to be wanted, not used.
But I won't be and that's all I'll ever be.
Bullet Dec 2018
I've been too lenient
I use too be someone you use to lean on
Made me quit smoking just so you can
Blow the smoke in front of my face

I'm sick of hiding meanings between metaphors
So from now on I'm being blunt with it

  Gave me enough **** to deal with for eternities
Questioning who I can trust with
Finding out nobody gives a **** about anybody
Life moves on and that it isn't permeant

Quest on too moving on is quiet difficult
When killing yourself everyday is evidences
From running away from you

When in actuality I had to analyze what you did to me
All these ******* lies that you set aside from me
I was still standing there in front of you

You dumped me in the dirts
Taking my best friend with you
Bet you didn't know it was actually you that smelled like filth  

In fear in a heart with no ears
When it was really you that wasn't listening
I believe in destiny and even though you took 3 years from me
You were only a tiny piece of it, for I am eternity
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