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Pony Boy May 23
I blame you.
why did you do this to me
              i could crumble in your hands and that didn’t matter
        all i ever wanted was to make daddy happy
       anxiety
you. did this.
i trusted you.
       I’m hurt
                   that’s all i thought about when it came to you.
pain
  I’m angry.
                   how could you do that to me
made me feel small
       made me anxious
                    the person i looked up to the most in this world has betrayed me
    I am broken
beaten
     hit
talked down to
                 I didn’t get it because i didn’t deserve it
  but hey
i now know i deserved the world.
      when you were just never able to give it.
it’s you dad
     it’s you
everything is your fault and you are the very reason i twitch
                     the very reason why i have authority problems
even with my own girlfriend.
  we’re the same age
              she makes me nervous like you’d make me nervous right before you’d drag your hand across my face that was probably the very size of your palm
         no Christmas
   no friends
  no
          family.
you kept me away
                     you beat
you yelled
             i was afraid
that little girl is afraid.
it’s your fault
     dad trust me it’s all you
it was never anyone else but you
               you weren’t the only one
but i only blame you.
didn’t edit.. just typed
Kai May 5
Tried to wash the scars embedded on me
Submerged the voices that left me haunted
Drowned the visions from the tall red oak tree
Remembering when you asked to “flaunt it”

I tried to scream, but choked on nonsense words
Your malevolent laughs replays in my mind
No evidence, but me and the blue birds
How hard is it for one to just be kind?

You left me with pain, you left me to cry
I can never get my innocence back
Yet, I still love you, but I don’t know why
I may not remember all that happened,
But my body does, my body remembers it all
Sleeves worn by broken trees-
I repeat
As the world goes on in glee
Defeat
No less a somber fellow
Borrow now he borrows

And burrows into your cotton cave-
A man
With a fluid feeling he misunderstands
Dead land
Where pain is of no mention
Tension here there tension

Indentations and stipulations on the seed of a neutered soul-
We must
And you lose or have lost it as you taste the cavernous hole
Of trust
Ribald fellow your weather betrays you it hangs your skull
On a lacking cloud that paints your spindly skin so dull

Gather what you must in the pool of shallow loving and shame-
No spine
As eminence confounds you and status escapes your stolen name
You shine
With the charms of dead brothers and the cruelty of a mother
Should you seek the soil now know that none will be bothered
LC Apr 14
my mind is the city
that never sleeps.
thoughts roam the streets -
some with circular commutes.
some glare at each other
some smile, uplifting everyone.
despite the chaotic rhythm,
the underlying beat of my heart
determines the pace of the city.
#escapril day 13!
A Howl,
Distant but fair.
A Howl,
Prickles fine hair.

It is ethereal
It is so sweet
Repeated in time,
It follows the beat.
monica Apr 10
too lonely to beat
too painful to bear

hold on tight
and make it right

take off the mask
and let them watch

they are the judge
to make things right
I love You because
you're like
Poetry to me -

filling up my lungs
with fresh, thin breeze;

I love You because
you make my Heart
skip a beat -

for it can't take
this drumming - crazy -
that's growing inside of me.
© 09/07/2019
There, the caldera bevelled
In the spitting image of her bell
Looking shy above the shore
Was the essence of her smell
Liquids sharp, naked harp
A catamite in my succor
Graceless heave, tender sleeve
Pearly trailing tail

Entwine, surrender, entwine, surrender
Scintillating boy or throbbing girl

In new moments, waves collapsed
Ink lashed on our toothless gaps
A monkey washed, motions high
Pink shores creased, began to cry
Swelling up like a storm
Smells of Eden, the baby is warm
In the cool flame which sits down still
As it marvels at the hole that it filled
Overlapping with her blue commotion
Like two hills on a vicious plane
Eunoia sighs in consummated sky
They curled deep inside
The cavity of their hands

As vesper came, they awoke with no name
But there was something on their tongues
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