and i could hate the one who birthed me
and went through all that pain because i existed.
and she made me hate myself,
drew a line in my memory.

i've got nothing to remember,
only triggers that seem to last forever.

but she was and is my mother—
and despite all the pain and all the hurt she's given me,
i'll still take her stand when the world calls her wrong,
'cause i know what it feels like
to see your own going against you, before long.

and perhaps i'll carry these wounds,
of having to grow up with her
while helping her grow.

for i was a child,
and i still am—
but somewhere,
i became the mother
that i never had.

Finish your nearly dead, full of
stress phase of an education
And when you are still alive
after this non-stop narration

Become a chained slave
Strangle yourself with work
Replaceable product, undervalued
because your boss is a dork

Hunt the treasure of lies
Russian roulette of dates
Hate is bigger than love
Still seen as soulmates

Lose yourself to the sheets
the day you marry someone
Pray to god, when your lover
dances with his handgun

Pictures of families with masks
to hide the black dark shadows
Don’t untwist your tongue
when the pain only grows

Start and raise a family
with kids you absolutely hate
Because, it doesn’t matter
when this is your fate

Everyone has parents.
They always mean well right.
Or maybe they weren’t taught to fight.
Because no one ever taught then right.
Through all the aggression and ego.
their younger selves never had room to show.
And the chance to have love to expand.
And without them listening to understand…
It’s a strange way for them to plan.
The cries are too low for them to fear.
So where is the relationship left to go from here?
Slowly fading away through every tear.

Ohh, Mother,
You once carried me in you.
The first definition of HOME.

Now, you look at me,
A pearl lost its shining.
The only thing
Gives you itches to your bones
Me living up to my own!
You only see
what I wear how I speak,
You only nod,
When my feelings come to your door.
Long ago, closed, with the caveat
Of leaving the host!
Now this house doesn't feel HOME.

"Cherry blossoms never bloom,
In the months of Summer", You said,
"Once on a Summer noon
An unwanted storm knocked
On your door".

An unwanted wind whispers to her mom,
"Why?!"

The greatest gift cannot be returned
What if it’s burned
Is it then okay to return
Damaged goods or just misunderstood
Put on the back shelf
Out of the way
What if it’s doesn’t stay
Is it then okay to betray
Disowned fore I do not recognize you as my own
Empty eyes
Those used to tell lies
It’s too late accept it’s fate
It’s burned but can it be turned
From both fate and hate

The blue and red lights flash,
The handcuffs snap shut—
But what was your crime?
I kept asking myself that,
As I watched them take you away.

Was it your courage when you decided to move?
Was it your audacity to leave everything behind?
Your ignorance, thinking you could see it through—
A better life for you and your children?

Or maybe it was just the fact that you did.
Working two jobs,
Starting a business,
Buying a home,
Placing roots.

That was it.
That was your crime.
It had to stop.

The blue and red lights flash behind you,
Your heart quickens, but still,
You turn to me and smile—
Lying through your lips,
"It’ll all be okay."

Silenced
Silence can be the loudest
It says the most
Like a ghost
It also has a story
This silence
It’s overwhelming
The calm before the storm
Then the question
Why was I born
The silence is now quiet
No answer
But your eyes speak
Those haunting eyes
Daunting
Avoiding
Avoiding me
Why
Silence

Come with me — we'll find some distant shore,
And read our letters written in the sand.
ger can't be spoken, nothing more—
The dawn has come, but not from East as planned.

My anger can't be spoken, can’t be named,
But still, I see the sunlight in your eyes.
ger can't be spoken or explained,
But still, you walked with me beneath the skies.

And every word we wrote was softly spoken,
While sun kept warming all our wounded ground.
Though something deep inside me still feels broken,
You came with me—and that is peace I've found.

The weekend's here with gentle light,
A time of peace, a heart made bright.
And as the hours softly sway,
I know your joy is on the way.

The morning breeze begins to sing,
A quiet hint of what life brings.
And in that breeze, I feel the sound
Of birthday blessings gathering 'round.

The sky is calm, the day feels sweet,
The world itself feels more complete.
Why? Because the time draws near,
When we’ll all shout and praise and cheer.

Just hours now, and candles shall glow,
With laughter warm and faces to show.
A weekend wrapped in celebration,
In holy joy and admiration.

My mummy, so dear,
Your birthday spirit's almost here..
And I can feel the heavens lean,
To crown you like a birthday queen.

This weekend blooms because of you,
A soul so kind, so strong, so true.
The stars themselves might blink and gleam,
Just to be part of your dream.

I see the joy before it lands,
Like flowers blooming in God’s hands.
A time of thanks, of sweet reflection
And endless love in your direction.

Though clocks still tick and moments wait,
My heart has passed through birthday’s gate.
Already singing, wide awake,
For all the joy your life will make.

The weekend comes just in time,
For a soul anointed, touched, so divine.
And as your birthday draws so close,
Know that you're loved the very most..