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in the middle of the night
I look up into the sky
simply wondering
how
and
why
I am standing here
why it is that I am alive
suddenly
this joy appears
which makes me feel
so alive
Everyday
for me is the same.
Wake up,
know what to expect,
go back to bed,
same old thing again.
But I am here,
waiting for something exiting to apear.
Maybe I should just be glad that I'm alive and well in the first place...
I left my thoughts on the pillow
and started waltzing on the carpet barefoot
just to see that wicked smile of yours
while the cloud's throwing out its soot,
making alliances with the purple storm,
unwelcoming the beauty of the darkness
the one between the stars,
keeping us in the fortress of unfulfilled dreams,
leaving us all behind stainless steel made bars.

I left my thoughts on the pillow,
the bedroom sins remain in the night,
your kiss has left all my senses in turmoil,
for I was and I am a very old soul inside.
Charmed and crowned by Madame Tempest,
looking for a bone of guilt,
expecting the unexpected at a wedding's breakfast,
a brilliant book of menace she has built.

I left my last thoughts on the pillow,
and then I left the other dark half of mine
that annihilated this restlessness from my soul.
Now I can shout out loud: I'm alive!
chest skipping a beat
butterflies in stomach
scalp massage
smell of crying
falling in a dream
memorable dreams
familiar smells
fall into a song
lay on a cold bed
blanket burrito
good small easy to chew ice
cracking knuckles
coffee on a rainy day
smell of rain
jumping for joy
closing 20 research tabs
warm hoodies
smelling food cooking
rap poetry
reading a good book
rewatching a good movie
feel-good games
plot-twists
puzzling movies
bubble wrap
smell of matches
thick milkshakes
navigating foreign subways
freezing outside to warm room
hot outside to cool room
peaceful nature
crying alone
nice socks
rolling down a hill
staring at space
afternoon naps
soft stuffed toys
hot showers
shouting yeet
anime
infatuation over someone
anguish
smooth rocks
stacking things
dogs
writing sentiments
i can still feel therefore i am still alive
Abby Jan 14
I want to feel alive
But instead all I feel is the strangling weight of my life
I want to do something
I want to be something
No
I want to be someone
This small town just isn't enough for me anymore
In all honesty, it never was
Because Missouri rhymes with Misery and sometimes that's all I can think about
This life is suffocating
I can’t stand it anymore
I have to get out and do something
I can’t just stay here and watch my life slip by
At my age Nadia Comaneci received 3 Olympic Gold Medals for gymnastics
Why can’t I do something like that?
I often think about what it would be like to just leave
I don’t mean dying
I mean running away
I often find my right brain is often caught drifting to what life would be like if I could make it to New York
But then my left brain starts to function again and instead my thoughts turn to how I would die of pneumonia in the snow
Sometimes I believe that’s still far more entertaining than my current situation
I want to do something great in my lifetime
The scariest thought of all is that I never will and I’ll turn out to be trailer trash and I’m not sure I can cope with that
Yes, I want to do something and be someone
But most of all, I want to feel alive
This is something I’ve been struggling with
Ruhani Jan 13
I am alive
even without you.
When you are not around
air seems the same fresh,
flowers are vibrant than before,
firmament is clear, cottony soft clouds.
Same chuckling with friends in the bar,
food tastes yum when I am starved.
Long evening walks are little alone
dark nights seem a little long
sleep troubles to come nearby
trail of thoughts from the day long
refuses to go away,
I don't think of you much now,
but whenever,
your thought flashes my mind
it feels like something is left behind,
not everything is same
life is going in vain.
Our fights, kisses and hugs are gone
and I am standing just alone.
Eno Jan 10
I remember the days
                 I used to wake up
                          And beg the ceiling to
                                           Fall down on me.


Now when I wake
             I beg the world
                      That I may have more days
                                      To talk to the ceiling.
Skeletons in your closet only proves you were once alive.
I cannot bury these bones somehow...
Yuki Jan 6
Hush.
Just breathe in
just breathe out.
Hushh.
Listen to the silence,
capture its whispers.
Hushhh.
Can you hear that?
It is your chest
going up
going down.
Hushhhh.
You are here,
you are alive.
Hushhhhh.
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