Floating on an endless ocean,
clear skies all around,
east, paradise awaits,
below, endless sin,
The apathetic soul does not fret,
closes it's eyes and awaits fate,
because the future is not set,
and it is never too late,
The apathetic soul knows,
but does not care it,
looks but chooses not to see,
the tentacles creeping from below,
slowly wrapping themselves around
the hands, digging teeth into flesh
Soul can feel a tug, sinking in disregard,
it can hear the echos of the eastern haven,
but the sounds of bubbling water feel warm,
against its eardrums,
when eyes open they realize
mistakes of the past cannot be changed,
when you're at the bottom of the ocean
waiting to breathe
Wednesday, May 17th, 2017
Ok so here we are
You at your house, me at mine
Sending pictures back and forth
But not those pictures, like the ones I used to send,
Which made me feel less like me and more like all of those girls.
We are sending pictures with our faces and sentences that make me smile because I love your sense of humour.
Ok so the things you do
The things you do, well…
It’s hard to say exactly how I feel about those things
I don’t agree with all of them
Like the smoking you do
To be honest it makes me jealous,
Jealous of that cigarette because it’s the one that gets to touch your lips instead of me
Your lips, hmmm im not sure I want those lips on mine
Because the smell of smoke makes me sick
But then I look at your lips and it makes me rethink.
Ok so the music you listen to,
The music you listen to tells a story
Unlike the ones which are just boring
Your favourite song the one you told me about,
The other night when we were sending those pictures with our faces and the sentences that made me laugh
The song was about taking your life
I wondered if it was a sign that you were in a fight with life
I don’t say anything but you know how I struggled with that problem
Now im sitting here thinking of all the things I said,
Wondering if it’s really worth the risk
So I make a list in my head and starts it with
so i will take your hand
and you will take mine
and we will stand.
sometimes still and sometimes grieving,
sometimes silent, sometimes numb -
there is a time to mourn and a time to heal.
We will recover kindness from the debris
not to kill with,
but to bring life.
gather the things we've lost and rebuild
yes, we will all die one day
but on all the other days, we will not.
When I look upon my path
All I can see is light
I feel a beating in my chest
But it's never felt quite right
The sounds will echo in my hollow head
The sounds will remain until I'm dead
An opportunity to climb the ladder
A door opened with success in sight
My heart can't help but feel sadder
My lungs run out of air
The will to continue has always been my swear
But what can I do when my legs go numb
When the thought of being without makes me feel bare
My hands will sweat
My heart will race and in that moment I'll care
Still I won't know
And maybe I'll never feel what I've imagined
And maybe I'll remain too scared to tell what happened
But that's not going to change it
That feeling of hatred
I'll still feel like a ghost
I'll still feel wasted.
Those dreams of warmth
My dreams of hope
They leave a crack in me
They leave a hole of frost behind
I need that warmth
Because maybe in time I'll be less than anyone can see
That's not a promise or a threat
It's my prediction
It's my fear that I'll never forget
i'm sorry love
but I can't get up
to play with you today.
I used to have
all this life in me
but it's up and gone away.
come sit on my bedside,
i'll tell you of the times
we used to have,
yes, I miss the days like that,
but the memories still make me glad.
I wish I had known then
that I was running out of time.
when we ran free never fearing that
soon it would no longer
all be just fine.
but there's nothing that you can do
so, please, there's no need to cry.
I can't play with you today, my love,
but tomorrow I will try.
There is always a Light at the end of the Tunnel,
the darkest time of Night always comes before the first rays of Day,
there's always a Rainbow after a thunderstorm,
and the strongest skin there is is that which has been scarred...
∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆
best selling author