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Factions dance blade
to grindstone
(action)
Scholars scratch pen
to paper
(action)
Thinkers mash pride
to danger
(inaction)

What have I done?
Oh, I've lived
Meaningless & Ill
Longer than expected

What all have I done?
Eagerly
Ejected myself
From ****, to wooden ****
ArielMarriel Feb 14
Little ills
need little pills
to numb
the night and day.
Little pills
in colors -
blue, white, grey.
Little ills steal smiles
and give chills,
instead.
Little ills,
all in my head.
Silver Feb 7
feel the burning in your head
feel the burning in your lungs
feel the burning in the heart
and the hurt that makes you start

see the white on your arms
and the creases of your palms.

trace the lines of regret. the small sting of
control.
spite.

silent thunder.

everything is anger.
you are anger.
everything is fire.
but you are even worse. the silent dark.

feel the snake rise up in your stomach
to your chest. blood flows down
into the abyss, iron tang
and black shine.

it's always your fault, they say. the way you present,
the who that you embody,
the tone you project,
the everything.
the coarse words scraping around
in your lungs.
(they're actually screams.)

search for red, red but only
find black, black.

ink.

fade,

but not away.
i'm sick of thinking your wrong is right
JR Falk Feb 3
I’ve been trying to convince myself that this isn’t the end
but as I pour my heart into this text I can’t bring myself to hit send,
the suffering of unsaid words shivers in my spine
and I’m left to lay in my bed and think of simpler times
when I could safely say you were mine and we were happy.
I wanted us to be happy but we were both struggling and still are,
in the same ways but differently.
It’s difficult to comprehend but
we both fight just to get out of bed and I can’t help but wonder
if we shared one instead of FaceTimed when we fell asleep,
it’d somehow be easier.
Or maybe we’d still be in this place,
only afraid to leave the house in fear we’d see each other’s face.
Instead I hear your name called when you’re nowhere to be seen
and am left with the reminders of what could have been.
You say I’m still yours and only need time to get your life in line
so I can safely call you mine
but there is no safety in silence when there are words left unsaid.
I wish I could reach through my speaker when you call
and say you’re feeling low, rip the weights from your chest
so we can let our worries go but I can’t and I’d still suffer.
Silently.
Secretly.
I keep saying this is fine but the words come out a lie
as I lay in my unwashed sheets and cry until I can’t breathe.
They burn my throat as I smoke another cigarette thinking
maybe if I smoke another something else can take my breath away
but when I fell for you
I found myself struggling to get the air into my tired lungs.
I already struggled to breathe from the bad habits and lack of sleep
but you changed the feeling in such a way
I convinced myself I was happy.
And you made me happy.
Blissful, content, I wanted to hold you
and realized life doesn’t have to end on a bad note,
but it came crashing back when the sun went down
and you started saying less when we’d call.
I know you never meant to hurt me,
it’s just the stresses from your head pounding relentlessly
until it bruised your heart too,
making it weary and unready for the love I tried to give.
I know I gave too much and there were limitations I tried to ignore
because I am the fool I am and still believe love is enough
but reality has finally set in that there are things we can’t control
that can make it so impossible to love from this far.
I want to better myself and my spending habits
so I can finally sleep in your bed,
but wants are different from possibilities and
until I know what’s going on
when I suddenly lose my sense of direction
and all hope of tomorrow
I don’t want you to have to try pulling me back into reality
when you aren’t so sure of what it is yourself.
So when you fall asleep tonight know you’re on my mind, too,
and I could never bring myself to hate you.
Know I hate the places we’re in and
the emptiness we feel even when others try
so desperately to fill those voids,
and the fact that love truly can’t stop it from devouring our minds.
I love you endlessly and I will never give up on that thought,
as you have shown me what I deserve,
and it’s not that it isn’t enough,
it’s just too far out of reach for me to accept.
You are the reason I get out of bed when I finally do
because despite the circumstances
I still want to believe that this isn’t the end.
That things could turn around tomorrow
and we will be happy
and not so scared
of giving each other
everything
without worry of our hearts
and our heads.
12:56am
2.3.2019

I put my all into things or nothing at all.
I put my all into this.
I want to believe you when you say this isn't the end.
But my insecurities won't let me.

I love you.
MG Jan 27
That night we drank whiskey til the sun came up;
You pulled me in,
And I pushed you away.
I wish I would have kissed you instead.
Mind Matterer Jan 13
Skin tight.
Bone hugging, more like
- is what is wished for and deemed right

The only way to
Grant this wish, fulfill this desire, correct the wrong
is to get rid of the hiss, right?

And in order to do so,
The Snake
will come slithering up and through your torso,
as a reaction to the bristles on your toothbrush;
Resembling grass
coaxing the snake out of its hiding.

Leaving your body and mind
Empty, relieved, satisfied and pleased.
Yet so fraught, disappointed, fearsome and creased.
IncholPoem Jan 11
If  both  husband
and  wife  are in
  hotel  and  hospital

   who  will  work
your  home  work.




   Your  train ed  dig-Alexa, Siri  or  Google

                          or
your  payment  taking
       servants.


If  both  enjoy    the
parts  high
then  who  will  care

   your  old  father
mother  who  are
in  ill  stage.



Your   pregnant  robot.
Your  son's girlfriend.
Your  surrogate  sister.
noir Jan 9
I made another mask

I got too much blood on the last one

I promise to take better care of this one

<Lies>

To be honest

I’ve forgotten what I look like

Behind my collection

<Is that really such a bad thing?>

I don’t know

You tell me

<I can’t tell you what you are>

I am

Nothing

.
i have no idea who i'm talking to but it feels like my conscience.
How are you not with someone?
You're so beautiful and gentle
Funny and charismatic
Caring and unbelievably understanding
You’re like a singular sunflower in a field of roses
People always go for roses
Because they think red is the most
Love Filled color
A dozen roses does not compare to a single sunflower
Yellow means caution
This could hurt
But go for it
Yellow is how I feel about a sunflower

Do you feel it when you’re flying, or does that come naturally to you?
I swear I feel like I’m floating when we hold hands or kiss
How does it feel to be so precious and light?
That gravity can't hold you down to Earth
Such a genuine person
Funny
Smart
Really what's the catch

How does it feel when you walk into a room and time stops?
When you get in my car and my heart stops
A man who walks into a room and the walls collapse at the very sight of him

How has such an amazing person been hurt?
Who was in charge of that
Me?
I’ll never do it again

Have you ever met someone and just thought?
Is it you?
It must be because the walls have collapsed
“Hello,” I look up at you
i was reading ill give you the sun by Jandy Nelson 10/10
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