How I wish, Caro
That you'd not have incompletely left
Had showed your desire more than you let
Less empty reassurances
And sadistic impossibilities
We both knew it would never be,
But you didn't even try to fight
For the possibility of a present
Instead you cornered yourself
With thoughts no descent
The greater probability that a future is nonexistent.
It caused such a drift
And I couldn't even hold on
How might I; when friction won't stay any long
You didn't leave completely, Caro.
You never will.
You never stopped gripping my hand.
You didn't,
But somehow did still
When you corroded the forces binding us so much.
That now,
I can't be wrathed at the situations for prying
As even I,
Want me to stop Trying

I asked you to meet me,
where the streets hum soft with rain,
in Amsterdam's quiet whispers,
where we could start again.

The canals held our secrets,
the bridges our unspoken dreams,
but now those pathways lead you
somewhere far beyond my reach, it seems.

I thought love would linger,
like the mist along the Seine,
but now you stand with another,
and I'm left calling your name.

The tulips have bloomed without me,
and your heart’s no longer mine,
yet I trace the steps we never took,
in a city lost to time.

So meet me in the echoes,
of a song that fades away,
where Amsterdam remembers us,
but knows you couldn’t stay.

Bored and lazy,
I lay my head down.
My eyes are closed,
Daydreaming.

I do not want
To do a thing,
A side effect
Of using.

I need a
Substance
Just to care,
Even when
I'm losing.

I'm thoughtless
When I'm sober,
Indifferent to
Refusing.

Learn from my
Mistakes;
Don't learn
By doing.

I wish I
Wasn't ruined.

Love drifts in riches,
Never to find you in time.
Hate ends in glitches,
Ready to date in a dime.
To see them go by,
Never flesh to our own eyes.
Makes you wonder why,
Darkness and doubt to despise.
Ego is dying,
Better find the spirit fast.
The wicked trying,
Angels dare loves demons last.
The old soul sinks, dies,
Numbed from waters rise…