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Humble Dec 2023
Once dubbed 'number two,' a label, a haunting echo, a constant reminder,
From a third year’s Scrabble match that left me second best, the genesis of a nickname I hated.

The bitter taste of second place, a memory stark,
A reminder of striving, of yearning, yet falling short.
Averse to the shadow of 'not quite,' 'almost there, but...'

It's funny how being second haunted me,
Always striving to escape my past and secrets.
I've hidden the truth about my family,
A split that's more than what the world knows, I’ve always been ‘the secret child’
A narrative whispered, diluted, for ears unacquainted.
Universe never seize to mock me with it.

Contemplating the roads I could have paved better,
Guarding what was precious, fortifying with fervor,
I’m here , pondering the 'what ifs' and 'maybes,'
A lament for the present, with heavy eyes and teary-eyes. Regrets linger for not trying harder.

Three years invested, hopes were shattered,
I don't blame you for trying to rebuild, giving it another try.
Instead, I blame fate, the ‘Universe’ A relentless orchestrator, marking me perennially 'two,'
Even when love briefly eased the burden.

Now, in the quiet of night, in sorrow's embrace I write,
Words once sweet now tinged with pain,.
I've been through a rollercoaster of emotions,

For days now, you’ve witnessed my descent and ascent, I blamed you, I tried being strong, became a wreck, got drunk to prove a point, isolated , sought validation from internet, found myself overwhelmed by the attention and tried to convince everyone ‘I’m fine’,  I felt numb.
Right now I’m just a shattered soul seeking solace in poetry’s embrace.
Every emotion, a verse, every thought, a line inscribed, writing seems to be my only solace.

To the boy I loved and wanted to give it all to, I’m thinking of you and I just want you to always be happy, being second doesn’t mean I can’t still be your number one cheerleader.
We always thought alike and wanted the same things; I do not wish to hate you as you don’t want it too.
I want to keep you as much as you want to do with me ,
Let's move past this, erase the awkwardness,
Let not animosity tarnish what affection once graced,
I hope we can salvage our friendship soon.
Love
irinia Nov 2023
the first snow so warm wonder
is whirling in our living hands
seconds can be windows
they can feel a kind of truth
an impossible simultaneity
of tears and laughter,
a peacefulness as deep as the roots.

let me circle around your mystery
give me one more second
to smile back at you
xavier thomas Apr 2022
Listen,
I still have deep feelings for you.
But I’m not gonna be chasing you.
I refuse to be your puppet that follows your every move out here.
You blew your chance when I gave my all in the beginning.
You played on that. You broke that bond.
It’s your fault why I don’t love you the same, my love.
And yet, I’m willing to give it another shot
for redemption.
I just need you to open your eyes.
You know I’m more than a “good man.”
Stop running game. Stop running this race.
Zack Ripley Mar 2022
there's nothing wrong with living in the moment
when you know you're dying by the second.
and, while it's true that you can get hurt
if you let your guard down,
there's nothing wrong with living like tomorrow's going to come.
because it will come whether or not you're here to see it.
but you never know when your time will come to an end.
so why not let yourself hope?
let yourself dream.
because life isn't always peaches and cream.
WickedHope Oct 2021
Why are you so ******* scared of me loving you
Was it her using you to fill his void
Or the second she
Who used you to wait for him
Are you scared of who I could be
Or who I am
I gave you second second chances
I let you choose first
And I'm still not sure why you cast me aside
You turned me into a shadow of she and her
Stealing what I could get
I gave you until the last second
For a second second chance
But when it came to me I barely got a second glance
Now that we are different and another warms our beds
Do you ever even for a second wish it was me instead
I don't know why you let me go when you still wanted me to stay.
JOY Oct 2021
I can't say that I'm living my best days
And I can't say that I get the man of my dreams
Because; he still chose the work days as an exercise to stay with me
And because he always celebrating with her , in their house not with me
And because he always smile that charming smile whenever he talk with her , and I thought I was the only one who make him feel that way

Some boy flirt with me when we walk in the street, and my head is spinning around with possibilities of what are you gonna do ?
Will you rebuke him and get angry like what you do whenever someone flirt with her ?
Or you just bring me closer to you and pass your long fingers on my shoulder,
like a hopeless and sad sign that, I’m all yours?
 yes,
the second choice,
always.
Nat Sep 2021
On darkest nights, when full moons preside
Silver bullets are just the thing
When the howls are coming from inside
Silence with silver, gunshot ring

Gold grows tarnished and fractured, such fragile prizes
And bronze knights are forgotten soon as the sun rises
Leave nothing to mock, nothing to pilfer
Paint the walls cerebral and silver
Salvador Kent Sep 2021
Wind. Walk outside.
You went again today.
Wood. Familiar landscape.

Blue. You're infatuated by the colour
For some reason or other.
Sad really. Sometimes blue takes over

Your mind so much you can't sleep.
Not that you sleep anyway.
Hilarious really. Two in the morning.

Why are you this way nowadays?
Did something happen? Must have
Because that would explain it all.

Funny thing. How time slipped away
Feels like March slipped to May
Slipped to now. You're staring at a pen and

There's nothing else to do.
Why are you crying now?
Did something happen?

You've been so blue recently.
You're always so blue.
Why are you always blue?
April 2020
Serendipity Jul 2021
Often deserved,
yet seldomly effective.
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