Hello Poetry is a poetry community that raises money by advertising to passing readers like yourself.

If you're into poetry and meeting other poets, join us to remove ads and share your poetry. It's totally free.
The smaller the ****
Nah that's it, seriously-
I'm not ******* you!

#SmallDickEnergy
A joke to compliment the small ***** ones prior - from the women's POV
calcium 4d
I’m no poet
But I sure sound like one
From my grammar to
the misused punctuation
I can express
What I feel
From my mind
To white paper
The paper is my canvas
my mind is the paint
the pen is my brush
and the reader,
The Art critic.
Go ahead,
critique me
but just like a painting
I don’t plan on changing it
What you see
is what you get

I’m no poet after all
Liesl 13h
She said my eyes were like stars that day
We'd been kissed by a flurry of leaves -
Autumn in the forest.
She said my mouth was so wide
I could've caught flies in it.
"Isn't the forest beautiful?"
She'd asked on gentle breath.
"Yeah," I said,
"I ******* love trees."
I wrote this poem after a few drinks. It’s absolutely awful and far too flowery even by my standards, but my poetry lecturer said it’s a humorously subversive and ironic piece. Maybe I should drink more often.
Maya 3d
the hens
have raised their fowl fists,
protested the pecking order,
debated the Cuckoo Clucks Clan,
and started a coup in the coop.
they have a bird's eye view from their fort,
truly an eggcelent perch to reside in while they gather resources and
duck when enemies fire.
joining is a nestcessary evil to end the corruption.
so, my dear,
please don't chicken out.
i have sinned. i have faced *** and walked backwards into **** writing this poem. forgive me please i couldn't resist.
I'm angry because my wife turned out to be a shopaholic ****.
She thinks she owns me just because her name is tattooed on my ****.
Even though I'm a poor man, my wife believes in living large.
My credit cards are maxed out because of what she's charged.
I go hungry while she and her lovers go to five star restaurants and order caviar.
I got my *** kicked when I tried to stop two large men from repossessing my car.
She brings her lovers to my house, the ***** doesn't even try to be discreet.
I'm about to pass out because for the last four days, I've had nothing to eat.
I just knocked her out, put her in a crate and mailed her to Japan.
I'm doing a terrible thing to the Japanese but at least I'm a free man.
I don't have to worry about her returning and going berserk.
She'll be stuck in Japan because she's too **** lazy to work.
My hair has turned solid gray because of what she did to me.
I may look like an eighty year old but I'm so happy to be free.
And I sat
to hear out
your tale
as you wailed,
of how bills
were streaming down
your mail.

To lighten up
your grumpy bumpy
mood.
I came up with
all things
black and blue.

And when
all was said and done,
here comes
a snoopy snap
with a
flashing smile,
that ran
from mile to mile
And nothing can make me happier but that smile.
Odd how some girls can't even
Do they count 1, 3, 5, 7, 9?
What happens when recipes call for
2 tablespoons of sugar?

Do they round up to 3,
Or take 1 for the team
by pouring 2 and hope
No one is looking?

On a pH scale of 0 to 14
What is a pumpkin spice latte?
Uggs are comfier than you think
If only they didn't make feet
sweaty and stink.

*** how do I even--
know that
pH 13
Pumpkin spice szn
I take one to keep the blues away;
One so I don't peel my skin like a banana;
One so I can sleep without being chased by death;
One so I don't jump out of the car on the highway;
One so I don't run down the street ***** talking about ethical consumption under capitalism;
One so I don't cry about the sad looking potato chip;
One to **** the pain in my heart;
One so I can focus on my school work;
One so I don't tell my teacher he looks like a bridge troll;
And one so I don't fall in love with you.
I don't know the man who waved at me,
but in my head
he's a silver haired Adonis,
Jimmy Stewart in construction garb.
My cigarettes are surrogate lovers.
Each with their own demands.
Lung cancer,
Birth defects,
Emphysema,
It's our imperfections that make us special.
Next page