I don’t want you to fall in deep..
You wouldn't want to love me anymore..
For this you'll find me creep ..
I'm afraid, you won't like what's inside..
‘Tis where darkest of my demons hide...
Emily 1d
117
I'm in the business of misery
And business is good
Lying, crying eyes
And eyeing crying lies

Death and life
Life and death
Eternity in a wooden case
A final home

Unless
You give me some coin
And give me some qi
That's when eternity
Can become piety
Borne of forgiving alms

It's a sin
It's a beautiful evil
To bring back one's love
Back from behind The Veil

Sweet nightmares
And terrifying dreams
Rest well
Without rapture

With the singing of my song,
And the swing of staff,
The chant of my scriptures,
And my daemon in tow,
We can wish you
The very best

Because my business
Is your business
And your misery
Is my money

But it's worth every penny
I have a satisfaction guarantee
Just close your eyes
And hold your breath,
Then awake in something
Better than life
And stolen from death
It’s the end of the world as we know it.


As the world falls down and begins to burn,
Everything that is moving, stops moving.
Everything that moves became a thing for the ashes to find;
All that which is living, is dying.


All the people underneath become surrounded by grief,
In the broken land that is so full of sinning.
In an unknown time there is no hope to be found…
For the living.


In the darkest hands,
There lurks a shadow of a man,
Who moves alone without wings.
The soul without a soul is still living.


Now he haunts himself,
As he walks throughout this Hell.
In a place he no longer knows;
He can never escape from himself.


At the end of the world as the fires burn alight
And the dark souls steal souls, as time comes towards an end,
We have no way out of the demons eyes,
That surround our lives, in the end times…
Still we are the living and we are without friends.


In our hour of need, we find ourselves on our knees;
Praying to the forever unseen, in a land without peace
And all that remains are the lives that we lead
And a promise of salvation, once our souls have become clean.


(C)2016 Aa Harvey. All Rights Reserved.
I don't think there are road maps
for these things;
I think the naivety of childhood has taken this long to uncover
blank stares and clenched fists, I think the nights
weren't so long when you got more than 8 hours
to rest your eyes.

I am slowly just molding
myself into different versions of who I want to be,
but my hands fumble and put the pieces in all
the wrong places before they get it right.
I softly take the thought of forever out of its box, wondering
if it will ever ring true or if it is simply another
of those lies that are spoon-fed to you until you can't
base your own experiences on fiction or reality anymore.

Do you want to know what we do in the dark?

This is different; the way secrets spill
from open mouths and the way our eyes are hazy from
drugs or tiredness /lowered inhibitions/,
in these moments we tell each other everything and forget about
spiked armor and the sound of death chasing
at our heels. We scrape our fingernails against
half-truths and discover the way honesty melts on our tongues,
warm, like we've forgotten what it feels like and are only just
welcoming it back into our bodies.

I want our dreams to realize the timing that clouds
our psyches with shared bliss, can you take a moment
and spell that out for me? What do your eyes see when we strip
the dusty fabric away,
are you closer to knowing
who I am? Are you closer to knowing
why we could never bee what we thought we should, because
reality is not born out of story-books, and picket fences don't
distill the truth enough to make it palatable?

We've had to learn ourselves to covet
all the places we've found to pour our hearts into, we've had to shield
any possible innocence and sharpen our teeth to guard it.
But now that these things are done and
there's dirt under our nails from burying those dreams,
take a shovel and tear them out of the ground, because it is never going to get easier, and you have to learn
this before it gets much worse.
Tear those half-hopes from the womb and force
them to breathe, they must choke on this polluted air before they are able
to claw their way into the light.

Stop burying what is meant to fly and don't turn your demons too soft, they have to go
through hell before this passes. But it will.
And when the sun comes up again and the ache sinks so deep through your bones
that your body collapses,
you will learn that these pains are a part of teaching you
how to be human, and your words
won't sink like stones anymore, you will learn
to deepen roots within yourself and to take these realities
with you, twisted through with your own hopeful fictions -

each in turn, will come to fruition and each in turn will both ruin
and create you - at once the struggle
and the passion
of becoming moldable and
human.
eli 5d
sometimes you want to give up
the thoughts fill up your beautiful sunflower soul
you begin to think is it really worth it
you let the voices in
"die"
"you're worthless"
"stop trying"
"your fat"
"you're ugly"
the voices begin to chant
you slowly give up
you stop swimming in your pool of thoughts
you drown

but then the water slowly begins to disappear
the voices begin to fade
the demons leave your head
and your sunflower soul becomes whole again
you can do this
I'm fighting my demons as they rip at my soul
exorcising their presence with hot burning coals

Constant reminders of all that I am
no room for mercy, they don't give a damn

Lashes and whips, barbed wire and chain
repeating their litany defining insane

They'll not desist in my tortured sick mind
they wheedle and poke, every sin that they find

For eternity and more, eyes glazed in the pain
burned on hell's pillars, again, and again
Just a thought, if hell is really forever, wouldn't it get boring? :/

I'm sure my hell involves a non-moving highway full of drivers with cell phones stuck to their heads ;D
Nylee Nov 2016
When I see people around
I see them all trying
To push their demons down
Showing no sign of problems
No worries , no pains
All well hidden , inside a compartment of brain
Protected by their face
All fighting a battle with their inner thoughts
Some victories and many lost
Each passing day , we fall inside ourselves
Think we have the burden of the world and the lives
When we are just tired of dealing our simple life drama
Forgetting the people around the world , some living
Barefoot with no home , starving
Forgetting those who lose their life , protecting
So that , we can continue breathing
Why waste the time given to us ?
Why see this life turn to rust ?
my heart accepted defeat long before the light had left myhome
and
to know of satans sorrow was a truth that made the smallest smile i could summon a monumental victory.
alone with the ever slowing beats of my heart now completely unable to keep track of days and nights
and against the blood sky, time began to lose all intuitive wisdom.
and with the perversion of space and time came distortion.
ghouls and ghost became party guests
the foul sorts of scaly serpents and winged apparitions had gathered in rows in perfect stillness like marble chess pieces standing guard.
they seemed now like great guardians of my fragile spirit
losing hope in the home of horror
the scarlet sky now began to sound its final hurah before the life was to forsake this place. and so it stretched out its smoky hands like raven wings draping darkness over the horizon destroying the last light of what i once knew
and within was me,
accustomed to the demons devilish dance, a prisoner with no will to leave, nor any power to see beyond the tomb that felt like the only thrown i was to belong too
yep i was fucked


years had passed this way, littered with tragic happenenings, broken relationships, addictions, and loss
yep i was fucked
now as if by some sort of devine intervention i could feel the dry dead air come alive.the blood drenched sky had  stopped shrieking and as i raised my head in relief the horizon burst into brilliant trails of flame emitting hypnotic hues of purple and blue. crackling against the dead air like gun powder a blaze

and in the swell of confusion a sort of panic gave birth to momentum giving way now to a frequency with holy resonance, that filled my flask with potent tonic, upon drinking it began driving fire back into the abandoned forges of my humanity. from the depths of self denial i had emerged without the shackles of self deception to bind me, and from the grace of gods design i knew now i was forgiven
othis poem was written to explain the dysfunction that consumed my life for years as mental illness and addictions sadly broke my spirit. and defined my sense of worth for far to long
Cadence Apr 16
10/31/2017

Why did I say that thing just now
And how do i manage to sound so proud around the people i want to impress
Im sure they can tell im just a little too loud
I talk a little too fast
Is it anxiety or mania that makes me act like that?
And why wont he respond?
Wait, which he am i on?
My hope for a lover shot down on the daily
But still i manage to feel ok when im not focused on waiting
Entertaining myself in other ways
Playing with words
Word salad, tossed in a ballad, tossed salad
Oops, did i say that?
Donno what im playing at
Dont mind me
Im finding it hard to wind down
If i run, my problems wont find me
Staring at the sun prolly wont blind me
If i pretend to be fine now
Will my demons remind me?
I just wanna share my poetry with someone that thinks like me
Whos likeminded, inspired, desires to climb higher
If knowledge is fire
Then my mind is a lighter
But my soul keeps tripping over her own shadow 
Boxing with my demons in the shallows
Maybe today I let them win
On the Eve of All Hallows, the winner is sin
Alaska Apr 16
I do not think I have ever felt this alone
since middle school...
And that is also when I was in my darkest place..
which is what scares me the most.
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