Sometimes I look at you, And love runs through my veins. A love that that brings energy For my brain, My muscles, My spirit. Sometimes I look at you, And I don't understand, What you're doing here, With me, Why you love me So broken Beyond repair. Sometimes I look at you, And I want to drag you To this hole I'm living in, Perhaps that way I won't be so lonely Perhaps that way You'll feel what I feel And discover You'll be better off somewhere else.
i wish i had never left it wouldn’t make a difference if i was there or if i never came in the first place, a testament to the latent fact that i am never anywhere or anyone anyways
and when i left i met you and i hate myself for it because until then i was fine it was all fine and it was okay
and now i’m thirteen again whenever i look at the instagram screenshot, i took it because i was zooming into your eyes too much and my fingers got tired and i decided to **** it
you’ve got me writing in verse you’ve made me published again i hate you for it
i want to be yours of course i do but i don’t just want that i usually would, but i just want you to be loved hell it doesn’t even have to be me it certainly shouldn’t be
i never looked at the sky before for answers, i think that ****’s pretty dumb but i’m also pretty dumb and you’re just pretty
if you would let me i would watch you forever i would listen for hours i’d follow you to hades or long island where you say it’s really sick or the ******* palisades or anywhere else but here and if you told me to drive off a bridge i would because it’s picturesque and you’re always right
and it’s not healthy but i never claimed to be
i can’t stop seeing what i want in my head, a movie of us surrounded by a green border i’ve gone way too far into it
and look at this **** i’m writing rupi kaur 2012 poetry so i guess she had a point about the books and the flowers or whatever
something about flowers is i thought they were so stupid like puppies and glitter but now whenever i see beautiful plants and old books i think of you and it’s sickening
a friend told me you love somebody else and it should have been relieving to me but then i just started to break because somethings wrong with me and i can’t just let the simple **** go i have to be dramatic i have to be the worst person in the world for some ******* reason
i think you don’t understand that when i look at you i don’t see the things you see because you’re beautiful and i ******* hate you for it
i don’t cry, i can’t really because being vulnerable is stupid and immature but every other day i cry and i cry for you and it isn’t fair i know but i can’t help it anymore
and i thought maybe it was another charade because i was bored and i wanted a game but then you revealed more of yourself to me and at some point i couldn’t deny that whatever you made me feel wasn’t fleeting it was forever and it’s still ******* here
i used to take risks and gambles and then i realized that they hurt beneath the skin and now i’m doing it again i’m screaming and clawing at the edge of the world
it’s two in the morning and i’m literally writing this out of order and i’m not mentioning what i should because if i do it will make it real and it will make me so utterly depraved and disgusting
i can write so many things for you and all for you and usually i could anyways but i can write books i can write anthologies plays and manuscripts things they put in chapels
if you see me don’t say anything you can laugh and swear and cuss me out and then you can leave me and i know you won’t because you’re so nice (and yes, i hate you for it) but you really should before i destroy us and this thing we’ve created
i like you too and i ******* hate you for it.
i'll cringe abt this in a few years but sadly i have mental illness LOL!
Why do I feel so lost? My life is getting better day by day, But my mental health seems to be the cost. I'm trying to listen, but I'm tired of what they say. The voices in my head are so loud, It's drowning out everything out. I feel like I have to act proud, But I just want to shout.
Leave me be you stupid inner thoughts! You cut me down harder than a knife, You make me feel like I'm at a loss. I don't want to die but I wanna give up on life! Why does everything have to be a certain way? Why do people continue to judge? Can't people just finally stay, I'm tired of each and every petty grudge.
This world is simple but yet so hard, I want to give up but I don't know how. I make a mirror break and use a shard, I'm not okay, there is no way back now. Like ***** I've known for awhile, It doesn't change the fact that I still love you. I keep trying to live in denial, You keep changing but I wish you loved me too.
‘’You are the perfect one My salvation The best thing I’ve ever done Is to love you back
And the languid wind, it’s telling me That you’re my companion All the stars burning up the sea The whispers in the canyon The dying grass under wilting tree All the buzzing bugs and the setting sun They tell me you love me too Is it true?
And the sunny breeze of reality Saying we belong together In the peace and clarity We'll be one for forever I’ll hold you with me like gravity I’ll be your earthly tether And when you say you love me too Is it true?
And if it is Maybe just a kiss On my longing lips All my years have led me to this To the point where I love you I live for you I love you I live just to love you’’
Keep parroting me I love you Just keep repeating what I say
‘’I love you’’
Keep parroting me Don’t stop Until you love me back
I wanted to write back to you for a long time But something kept me passed out On this mellow bed I tried to forget him for all the summertime and I don’t need him Perhaps better without But it’s a matter of want I want him I was created to love I love him I moved to this unknown town With buildings that tower over me It reminds me of him His mastery of everything He knows too much It almost suffocates you So I ran away But why can't forget about him? His thoughts creep inside my mind They infect and multiply Until only thing that remains Is just him But why can't I get over it His voice bleeds from the wall of my room Drop by drop filling my ear His laughter, wittering His giggles beat in the corners of my room His humming ambles all around me His breathing lies beside me Am I insane, going crazy? I feel like burning Slowly breaking apart I bury my face in hands And I bellow in pain It’s almost like that I can’t think of anything else I wrap myself in his images in my mind You ask about me, what is there to tell? I don’t know anything about myself Who am I? Tell me Am I real? Was I created so you could say The things you can’t otherwise Too good at lies Am I just a character in your head? You needed someone to listen, and instead You created me Needy, lonely You are an immaculately horrible architect You created me but too close to yourself I’m just you in a guise Too good at goodbyes Erase me, I can’t share your pain At this point I can’t take it anymore So Heed me Heed my call End me already ‘’I can’t’’ Or fill my world with happiness ‘’I can’t’’ I beg you ‘’forgive me Joanne I can’t, these people are too real humans, they scare me they surround me, making me unable to breathe they crush me underneath their greed they disappoint me when the paint I put on them evaporates revealing just how unkind they are Joanne, I am weak I need you You must remain I need someone to share my pain’’
The poem is about an imaginary character created to bear the pains of the creator, she writes a letter to her ''God'' to end her misery as she is only a one dimensional sad damsel.