her heart was filled with rocks
stones of many kinds
a heart so very heavy
she was running out of time
she needed his love
she needed it now
her heart was so heavy
it weighed her down
it hurt to walk
it hurt to breathe
she still had
things to see
she loved his eyes
and his lovely dark hair
whenever she saw him
she couldn't help but stare
her lips ached
they ached for him
a taste of his love
a taste of his skin
she was so weighed down
she knew she'd drown
in pretty blue eyes
and locks of dark brown
she couldn't help
but obsess over him
such little time
lights growing dim
i need you

as i gaze up high

i observe a forever ashen cloudy sky

begrudgingly one boot,
then the other

my genuine thirst for the day is solitude and cover

away, the place where people i push

tormented broken hearted mind of mush

"dear john" is not for me

even though this landscape is not where i want to be

dispatch the clouds

a lunar or solar moment my eyes will never see

set my mind and soul eternally free

basking in longevity under the canopy

the canopy of your shaded tree

Truth teller
Truth teller
what will
you tell
will your tongue
be a sweetner
a luminescent pearl
or will it be a flame
to burn down the world.

the cherry blossom accord/equation

”perfumers use aromachemicals to recreate a cherry blossom accord...(an accord is a scent made up of individual aromachemicals, that when combined, create a harmonious blend where none of the individual ingredients are able to be detected on their own).”

the odor of our lustful eyes,

the sweat, a unique commingling,
a sheen of salted oils body bathing,

crushed green petals of peaches,
crumbling together of the softy fuzz,
the sediment of aromatic fruit juices drippings

our blending bottled in our brains,
none other would recognize but we,
to too two smell each other through and over
floors, concourses, cities, disparate distances

our ingredients secreted (secret),
our flavors cell secreted (secreting)
the world’s tittering aroma inserted,
our sparking fingertips touching
add a bush burning burnt odiferous

we seat across from each other in an airport
plastic restaraunt and everyone asks out loudly,
what is that smell, feed me that, taste me that,
as we are irradiating the atmosphere,
as we renegotiate our cherry blossom accord,
fresh signatures, updated, harmony of harmonies

she smiles, I joke, winking,
we must continue to meet like this,
the fireworks of we, us to-gather to-gether,
a getting of giving, and she answers:

take me home and bathe me in love,
give our bodies shelter from the world outside,
beside a new spice have I uncovered,
this will require some discussion+exploration,
the quantity to be added, the when, and the how!

what is this new ingredient?
asking puzzled and aroused,
she laughs (a spice already included),
why it’s called only love poetry






8/23/19 4:55pm

you are everything i want
but really
i must not lie
you are nothing of what
i need.

Once upon a wonder
You must’ve known me.
Unfamiliar familiarity,
Straight through me you see.
To you transparent,
My mind a sieve.
Surprisingly apparent
Reluctant for you to leave.

She is a hive full of
Sweetness.
But , never far from
the sting .

“I see you “ she smiles
as she touches my face .

Upstairs she lies
with coverlets and curtains.

I am searching
and searching.
But , for what
I’m not sure .

Maybe diamonds
but probably
Fireflies and Lace .

Working towards not
losing my shadow.

My inertia’s held
prisoner
to her beauty
my moral vision
called and questioned.
The death of leaves ,
stranded on the high wire
in the back of beyond.

if you don’t play
by their rules
you can’t lose
at their game

I don't believe in soul mates
What I do believe in
Is people that connect
On some deeper level
Immediately upon acquaintance
And not meaning you agree
On where to eat for dinner
But the connection where your heart
Seems to slip out
Of your rib cage
Because it's found a home
Outside of your chest.

If a writer
Falls in love with you
       you can never
                die................

If wrong was right
Then I'd be right
Mostly every time

If do or die
Was the way to live
Then I'd be doing fine

If problems would
All disappear
Blink and they go missing

If answers came
In sheets of gold
I could not afford to listen

If what I said
And what I did
Were one and the same

Who am I
Trying to kid
It'll never go down that way

Because right is right
And wrong is wrong
Proudly on display

So get a clue
Not as I do
And certainly not as I say

there's the end to every word,
the end to a sentence,
the end of every story,
so it is now,
the end
of us.

-wonderwall-

My story begins with pain coated with tragedies and sealed with impending woes

maybe today’s the day

keep your eyes closed love.

           e     t      
       m           i
    o                 m
s                        e  
                            s     all you have to
                                                                ­
                                                                ­ l                  is to what the sound
                                                           ­      i            n
                                                  ­                s           e
                                                               ­          t

                                                              ­                               v
                                                               ­                         a        e
                             ­                                          of the  w               s
                                                               ­                                       
                         ­                                                                 ­            tells  you
                                                                ­                                        to do.

I SAW MYSELF

I saw myself twenty years ago
at a rest stop—
the me I will be twenty years from now—
moving from X to Y
or Y to Z.

I was moving then
from J to K
or K to Z
with kitchen collapsed and clothes  
and meaningful things
in my blue Ranger’s bed  
beneath the cap.

Heading north,
north of Sioux City,
at a sunny rest stop next to a cemetery,
I sat at a picnic table with Jack,
my liver and white Brittany,
when he, when I, drove up in similar truck
with kitchen collapsed and clothes
and meaningful things
and a Brittany of his own,
orange and white.

I saw myself twenty years ago
when he, when I, got out,
older and slower,
with hair as white as our Brittanys.
He, the me, tethered his dog to a pine tree
and gathered up straw to pillow his head
and slept
while his Brittany (just north of a puppy)
sat quietly by his side,
looking at me and Jack (ready to play),
wanting to play
but respectfully, obediently
declining.

I saw myself twenty years ago,
the me I will be in two decades;
but he never saw me,
never once looked my way.

I saw myself twenty years ago
sleeping with straw for a pillow
under a pine tree with a Brittany
at a sunny rest stop
next to a cemetery.

And as I pulled away from me
his license plate appeared:
Florida.

I saw myself twenty years ago
with a Brittany by my side
heading north
to the Dakotas.


I SAW YOU SITTING THERE

After many miles on the road that day,
I stopped north of Sioux City to rest.
I was tired and wanted to lie down—
simple as that. I got out with Jack
to find some shade out under a tree
and saw you sitting there at a table:
a young man full of life and alone
with a Brittany full of life of his own.
And the dog knew all, but you were gone.

And he was a handsome dog, a little
big for the breed but quiet like my own.
And he alone took notice of me, but  
you—a young man full of beans and chaff,
unconcerned about old age and death—
respectfully disengaged and declined.

I pillowed up some straw and slept and dreamt
about when I was your age and all alone:
a young man full of beans and chaff,
moving from K to Z,
not thinking about old age and death.
And when I awoke you were gone,
and I was beneath a tree, chaff in shade,
et cetera-ed unto eternity.

And later that day, while quietly I Iay,
they hauled away my truck and its belongings.
And then, untethered, Jack and I roamed
from tree . . . to table . . .  to cemetery,
burdened only by the weight of my longing
to have once again the opportunity
to have you or me say "Hello"

ain't no apologies can ever make this right
i know a part of me is costing my sleep at night
but when i hide my face they never see me frown
and if i look away they'll never bring me down

not looking forward to it
but it's some progress i guess
not that i'm bored of this yet
but i wish that i could forget

so am i the villain in your fairy tale
not even close to winning when our mates are stale
and if i break that mask will i see through you
and if your friends were asked would they say it's true too

If you could read my mind,
You’d see a thousand papers
Filled with broken poetries
And deadbeat proses
Full of woeful verses
With mournful pieces
Of unfinished stories
That are yet to be written
And failed to be spoken;
If you could read my mind,
You’d hear horrible screams
And earsplitting weeps
From shattered dreams,
Kept in a nasty notepad,
Scribbled on a bed
Of bloodstained words,
Ringing in my head.
If you could read my mind,
You’d see the shadows
That lurk within me;
You’d hear the bellows,
Screeching the words
“I’m tired,”
“I’m a failure,”
“I’m stupid –”
I know it sounds stupid,
It’s pathetically foolish
And seems too *******.
If you could read my mind,
You’d feel the tears
I had ever failed to cry;
You’d see the people
That make the weak weaker;
You’d see the monsters
That consume my head;
You’d hear the hollers
That failed to be freed;
You’d see the heart
That still bleeds and bleeds.
If you could read my mind,
You’d see the face
I’ve failed to show back then,
The face I’ve faked back then.
If you could read my mind,
You’d see a character
I had ever failed to become
If you could read my mind,
You’d be able to read
A book you never wished
To touch and read,
But sometimes I still wish
Someone could read my mind.

You're not lost,just because you didn't comb today
I see you here, yet your thoughts are drifting away ...
You rake the leaves, with your bare hands,
You try to see, where your future stands.

You're not lost,  just because you need a break,
I see you smile, while trying to hide your heartache
You collect the dirt, under your fingernails,
As you walk barefoot and cover your trails.

I still see you, underneath the falling leaves,
I hear your voice say "thank you"  and "please"
I see your true smile, glowing in your eyes,
You're the only reason, my soul survives.

You held the paper
between you lips
and inhaled

I've never
Been so jealous
Of a cigarette

old man
lost in thought
snack discarded upon his knees
face resembling creased linen
hands meagrely fleshed
bones and veins in stark relief
eyes hiding damped down
disillusionment
shading a silent shriek of
long lost belief
youth long forgotten
long ago days blended
into lengthening shadows
drawing near

I love him
I tell myself
I know that
We will be together forever
I don’t believe that
We could be separated
My thoughts tell me that
He’s the love of my life
Sometimes my heart lies and says
I could live an eternity
Without him
Like my friends say
“We’re perfect for each other”
And you can’t tell me
He’s not the one.

Now read from bottom to top.

Sometimes,
being good
isn't about
acting kind.

Give me Greenland, make it mine
Let me buy it just in time,
For Thanksgiving so we can
Induct these folks into our clan.

Why waste time debating ‘why’
This proposal shouldn’t fly,
Surely Denmark needs the cash
Here’s your chance if you just rush.

Putin took Crimea by force
Not a penny paid of course,
I instead will meet your price
For this island full of ice.

Think it over, but think fast,
As my offer won’t long last,
Let’s get on and make this deal,
With a pen stroke this thing seal.

Since I’ve got some Nordic genes
And as a man of copious means,
I can make this work all round
With results that will astound.

We almost bought it once before,
Why not this process now re-store;
You get the green, we the land,
On me the burgers and the band.

My shadow
it wants to be me,
it's jealous,
can't walk and can't sleep.
It thinks
that I'm living a dream,
and to be me
it would do anything.

Be careful
what you wish for
- I say to it.

You were the first person I ever felt something for.
I felt happy,
Felt loved,
Well almost.
But by the end I figured out that you could never love me,
And no one else can.
You ruined me for anyone else,
You ruined my trust,
Burned up my chest,
And now my heart hurts.

She was an angel or was she the devil?
I try to beat your game but there are so many levels
Just wish that I could had helped
But it's hard when you don't know what you want yourself

- maybe you were the problem and the solution all at once