Run like there's no tomorrow
Cry only to alleviate sorrow
Live like our time is borrowed
lets not cower
take this life by the neck
imprint you are not a coward
the hurt makes us stronger
punch with everything you made of
even sorrow we devour
churn it in our soul
then spit out flowers
let your flamed courage bring forth the rain
let it descend
It's a meteor shower
let this winged words take you higher
soar above the chaos
i bet life will seem brighter
we are all born as fighters
its for us not give up
in this world
with all the power.

her hair was tangled
into the dark stars of night

her eyes were shut

her words were in anguish

where has she gone

I'm sorry I had to go
I didn't want to but I had to go
I don't know if I'll return, but I had to go
I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry, But I had to go
Will you forgive because I had to go?

I can now only contemplate the distance
from where I stand to where it glistens
the winding road ahead I forecast
brings myself the feeling of tense

the hesitant first step will always be the hardest
no idea exactly where is the ending
but here is me at least trying.

As the night greets
Silently
Hauntingly
My memories rush in

What seem like a life time ago
Feels like just yesterday
Our last goodbye
Not a final one, but still

When I was
All you thought about
Dreamed about
When I was, enough

These days
You prefer
My silent presence
And that's what will remain

I don't need
... silence
I love words
Pretty ones too

Her cheeks a'blooming
Fresh petals
Assuming a charm
All their own....

Flesh roses
In a flute of bone.

Her arms are strong wings
Ethereal beauty, poised
For her flight, as a
Tern is
On its long feathered flight
From the North
She flies

To the South
Only to meet
The arctic waste
Once more...

Yet the flesh roses never fade

For they are
frozen with tears.

Catherine Jarvis
8/19/2019

I wish I were prettier
I wish I were younger
I wish I were smarter
I wish I was skinnier
I wish I did not have to love with all my heart
I wish someone would love me back
I wish that person would want to keep me and not just use me
I wish I could mean so much to someone
I wish I wasn't alone so **** much

i lost count of sheep
on waiting for you to tell me something
i want to hear

i lost track of time
on waiting for you to catch me
in this falling game

but above all

i lost myself
trying to be someone
you want me to be

Falling in the darkness
Hell is closing in
Struggling for survival
Striving not to sin
Screaming through the terror
Calling for the light
Making peace with pain
Falling in the night
Darkness is descending
Weeping for the light
Death is settling in
Shrouding all that fights
Wide yawns the grave
Calling for your life
Hellish despair, rotting at the edges of the fight
Falling through the darkness
Crying for the gift of sight
Hope, clinging to the memory of light.

She is a hive full of
Sweetness.
But , never far from
the sting .

“I see you “ she smiles
as she touches my face .

Upstairs she lies
with coverlets and curtains.

I am searching
and searching.
But , for what
I’m not sure .

Maybe diamonds
but probably
Fireflies and Lace .

Working towards not
losing my shadow.

My inertia’s held
prisoner
to her beauty
my moral vision
called and questioned.
The death of leaves ,
stranded on the high wire
in the back of beyond.

not good enough to talk to
not worth talking to

can’t talk to

can’t speak to

can’t share secrets to

not good enough
not good enough
not good enough
not good enough
not good enough
not good enough
not good enough
not good enough
not good enough
not good enough
not good enough
not good enough

i’m not good enough

i’ll never be good enough

i’m never your number one

With inquisitive glances and scant hesitations,
We gradually pull closer into each other,
Akin to ocean waves slithering to unite with eager grains of sand

Our eyes light up a flame of lust and our mischievous hearts tiptoe akin to scheming thieves
Our faces bloom a rose red and our lips shimmer in the morning's chuckle of light

With invigorated glances and insatiable desires,
We embrace passionately and interlock lips,
Akin to ocean waves sensually dancing with excited grains of sand



Melody
8/19/19

my heart burned
oh it burned
a candle set aflame  
a bright light of gold
warm and full of life

but with no one to love it
and keep it alive
that fire died
and the world turned dark
and my heart turned cold

-you blew out my candle to wish for someone else’s heart
~e.m

Ahead of me
In the woods
At dusk like
A big cat
With big eyes,
The future turns
Away and runs
Up the switchbacks
Without a sound
Each paw pressed
Into the spine
Of my anxiousness.

like ripples in
evening's pond
and wind
through the trees
of the forest beyond
another voice is
raised in song
uniting spirits
of nature's throng

Im lost like the dead
In a cool summer night
Winds weave together
Poorly
And i walk with all might
Serene Chaos
In ol pale moonlight
So pale, so pale,
The palest I'd seen
Known would quite know
Your special black gleam
So Leave Me To Rot Here
In this Grove all my own,
Grown accustomed to rain
And the deaf silent tone

I go out

Most nights

They consist of slushes and candy and sweet night time kisses

Most nights it’s dark and I remember to put things back

Not last night

Unlike most nights I forgot

I forgot to pick up and be quite.



No my most nights will be no nights..

And my sweet kisses will be a wet pillow full of sadness

you made me feel immortal
and in return
i broke your heart
perhaps it is not that simple
but isnt it?

the heart of a lion
resides in my chest.
the heart of a lamb,
within yours.
ironically,
they are identical.

Talking about pain,
I will abstain,
From spreading everywhere.
I tell sky a little bit,
In the afternoon taking seat,
On the green grass-carpet,
Then a relief I get.
At night I open mind,
When jasmine says, "Hello wind."
Stars ask, "Are you sad?"
"Brush away it, be glad."
Happiness says being raged,
"All the time you are engaged
In the boring blue bird,
Leaving him so hard?"
Water lotus asks showing charm,
"Are tears lukewarm?"
Wind says gently embracing,
"Stop crying, moon is dancing."

And to speak of glacial pace; a moment to rest, but unsparing to change.
I have yet to leave, so I'll stay.

Living was a constant battle
My thoughts told me I was worthless.
Stupid and unloved.
People’s actions left an impact on me
My emotions left neglected.
Unhealthy coping mechanisms.
Filled my days with ease

take every chance you get
every single one
cause right now
all i feel is regret
for not taking that chance
on us

when they insult you
smile back
when they hurt you
smile back
they don’t matter
you matter
so smile back
know in your heart
you will show them all
what you are made of

keep your eyes closed love.

           e     t      
       m           i
    o                 m
s                        e  
                            s     all you have to
                                                                ­
                                                                ­ l                  is to what the sound
                                                           ­      i            n
                                                  ­                s           e
                                                               ­          t

                                                              ­                               v
                                                               ­                         a        e
                             ­                                          of the  w               s
                                                               ­                                       
                         ­                                                                 ­            tells  you
                                                                ­                                        to do.

The inscribed stone
winks at moon to compare
smudges on face.

*

I ask myself to know
thyself. Life will smell the blood,
of what hurt your dream.

*

Will not erase your
name from jessamine.
Winter always waits.

If you could read my mind,
You’d see a thousand papers
Filled with broken poetries
And deadbeat proses
Full of woeful verses
With mournful pieces
Of unfinished stories
That are yet to be written
And failed to be spoken;
If you could read my mind,
You’d hear horrible screams
And earsplitting weeps
From shattered dreams,
Kept in a nasty notepad,
Scribbled on a bed
Of bloodstained words,
Ringing in my head.
If you could read my mind,
You’d see the shadows
That lurk within me;
You’d hear the bellows,
Screeching the words
“I’m tired,”
“I’m a failure,”
“I’m stupid –”
I know it sounds stupid,
It’s pathetically foolish
And seems too *******.
If you could read my mind,
You’d feel the tears
I had ever failed to cry;
You’d see the people
That make the weak weaker;
You’d see the monsters
That consume my head;
You’d hear the hollers
That failed to be freed;
You’d see the heart
That still bleeds and bleeds.
If you could read my mind,
You’d see the face
I’ve failed to show back then,
The face I’ve faked back then.
If you could read my mind,
You’d see a character
I had ever failed to become
If you could read my mind,
You’d be able to read
A book you never wished
To touch and read,
But sometimes I still wish
Someone could read my mind.

I’ve Been Wondering,

Have you ever clapped your hands
above your head
and snapped up some insect
that buzzed above you
in G flat minor,
then gone and thrown him in your ***
overflowing
with other
arthropoda players
you taught to hum a marching tune
by John Phillip Sousa?

Look at me in the mirror.
Help me see a little clearer.
Draw me just a little nearer.
Like me a bit more dearer.

Look at me and love me.
Love who I want to be.
Just squeeze your eyes and try to see.
The unnoticable beauty.

But it's no use.
The girl in the mirror dissaproves anyway.