As beautiful as you think falling in love is,
Sometimes you're not meant for each other.
And that's okay.
I hope you can remember your kind heart.
Your soul is beautiful,
So don't let anyone take that away.

Maybe I,
Don't know
Maybe if
Maybe so
How many more maybes until I let go

a wave takes its form
yet never with pattern
movement maintained
as water continues to exist
generally insignificant
but looking closer,
how beautiful it is anyway

What a rotten time to fall in love.
When I'm on the brink of tragedy,
On the edge of something so insurmountable that
I can't even contain it in both outstretched, weak, aching arms.
When I'm so close to the capstone of calamity that I can taste
The wreck on my tongue as it rains down my face.
I'm a goner.
The cataclysm that all good poetry is known for-
I am drowning on the words before they reach you-
I asphyxiate on the dark after you fall asleep.
Steady, lulled into a composition of notes and gasps.
I wonder if you know what I'm thinking about
When you wrap your hand around my throat.
I want to be the kind of person that your love deserves.
I just want to be the kind of person who isn't dripping with
Grief.
I'll find a sermon in every word you speak,
I'll chant it like prayer,
With my hands clasped to my chest in some
Frenzied, violent attempt to swear to God.
There is no reply.
Just your hand on my skin-
Less like touch and more like collision.
Please, stay. I'm begging now. I'm on my knees.
How do I look?
Do I look as pathetic as I feel?
I sink into the sadness but you're still holding my hand.
I don't speak, I overflow.
I don't love, I anesthetize.
I am destroying myself and you won't turn your head away.
Like a car crash. Like a collision. Like your hand around my throat.
I am paralyzed with a fear that God can't hear me.
"I love you" and I suffocate on the silence.
"I love you" and I choke on the apology that follows.
"I love you" and I am so sorry.
“I love you, too.” and I take my first breath.

I am not sad
I am not sad
I am not sad
The darkness keeps
Eating away at the remnants
Of the pleasant facade
That I built for myself
But I am not sad
Until I am returned to
The Earth from which
I was born
I will refuse to make
The inconvenience
Of my sadness drag
Me into a pit of darkness
I am not sad
I am not sad
I am not sad
I am not
sad

I’m a lovely dose of petty lachrymose
For looks mean nothing to my tear-stained eyes
I’m a lovely dose of what matters most
For no one will sing of my own demise
I’m a lovely dose of what keeps giving
For generosity is what I seek
I’m a lovely dose of what keeps living
For now my life has reached its peak

"Life is like biting into the ripest peach,
Only to realize,
Your just chewing on dog ****."

My love for you grows in dark places.
It needs no sun or smiling faces.
It needs no water, earth or heavenly graces.
It sees no creed, tribe or races

It was planted there long ago,
With pain, it was seeded down below.
It was nourished with tears of sorrow,
And buried deep within its borrow.

Today it's shoots exposed their blooms.
I picked them for you and brightened my tomb.
Today it took flight and revealed its plumes
Leaving behind a worn out, beaten womb.

Its all in my love for you.
Good, bad, there is fear too.
But with you it will accrue
Into the kind of love I feel for you.

Frozen ground beneath the feet,
Still air hangs.
Wisps of pale red cloud linger motionless.., as if hung from silken threads.
Ice sheets cracking above
Crystal clear waters.
Northern hemisphere in winter,
a much maligned time of year.
But in my eyes
She is wonder , she is beauty , she is
Glory.

Come with Me- Beloved
Into the Wild Throw
Of Radical Undoing
Disappeared in Love
Only the Aroma of Heart Remaining

Sadness overwhelms me, the pain so deep within.
To know I lost my dearest friend, is something I can't comprehend.
I was so messed up in life,
I wasted many days.
But you were always there,
My savior in every way.
I took life for granted, never expecting you to leave.
But the Lord called you in his arms, and I am left to grieve.
For the loss of a good man, a friend in every way.
That you have finally found your peace,
I'll pray for that everyday

Pride and ego like my ball and chain,
Can't complain with no urge to change.
Fallen in a pit, which ain't that bad.
Honestly,
I'll just settle.
Coasting on the highway takes little effort.

It’s hard to tell the lies of impression,  
little bits of puffery that
makes one  look good in the eyes
of a would be admirer.

One may say their name
with a French flair.
Betty becomes Bette.
Roy becomes Roy-al
with the long affected A
stretched out to tomorrow.

One may even tell the story  
about that old trick knee,
the birthmark turned war wound.

When they burn books,
in the end,
they also burn people.

She is soil,
earth and pure.
I run her through my hands
and she falls
through my fingers.

he left me.
he hurt me.
he lied to me.
he made it hard for me to trust.
but,
i trust you.
i trust that
you won't leave me,
you will be kind to me,
you will be honest,
you are the best thing for me.

remember to never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever
ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever

compare yourself

Roses are red
Violets are blue
I'm empty
Because I don't have you.

The smell of death will sicken.
The fog and dust.
Lice have armor but still die.
Guns, camouflage.
****** war over anything.
The hurt will last.
Black, white, blue, red.
So many things we acknowledge, and so many things we forget.

Abyssal clouds, of sunken shade,

Such memories,

A constant fade.

I bellow for it to return to me,

But all I see is a drunken fantasy.

Forever lost, of something meant to be.

Once upon a time
Everything was fine,
Once upon a time,
Once upon a time.

Let's eat good food together,
Forget about getting fat.
You actually look a thousand times cuter,
If you stretch your chubby cheeks like that.

You know it doesn't matter to me
If you are not skinny like the others
All I want is to see you happy
Even if you are now having your 4th burger.

Your stories
Your voice
Your music
Your smile
Your iloveyou's

will forever remain
engraved in my being

Although death cheated me
But death will never win
I will be the vessel of legacy
Continuing our fight
for meaningful life...

the problem is
i care
too much
about
not caring

Because the earth’s round
Doesn’t mean it’s  having a ball.

Because waves crash
Doesn’t mean that they aren’t in control.

Because the sea is deep
Doesn’t mean that it’s thoughtful

Because land meets the sea
Doesn’t mean that they agree

Because you float my boat
Doesn’t make me the captain.

d
....o
.......w
..........n

...............t
.................h­
...................e

.......................s
.................­........t
..........,...............a
......................,.......i
.....­..................,........r
...................................s­

--------------------------dady------------------
              ­     laid in a pool of blood

If you could read my mind,
You’d see a thousand papers
Filled with broken poetries
And deadbeat proses
Full of woeful verses
With mournful pieces
Of unfinished stories
That are yet to be written
And failed to be spoken;
If you could read my mind,
You’d hear horrible screams
And earsplitting weeps
From shattered dreams,
Kept in a nasty notepad,
Scribbled on a bed
Of bloodstained words,
Ringing in my head.
If you could read my mind,
You’d see the shadows
That lurk within me;
You’d hear the bellows,
Screeching the words
“I’m tired,”
“I’m a failure,”
“I’m stupid –”
I know it sounds stupid,
It’s pathetically foolish
And seems too *******.
If you could read my mind,
You’d feel the tears
I had ever failed to cry;
You’d see the people
That make the weak weaker;
You’d see the monsters
That consume my head;
You’d hear the hollers
That failed to be freed;
You’d see the heart
That still bleeds and bleeds.
If you could read my mind,
You’d see the face
I’ve failed to show back then,
The face I’ve faked back then.
If you could read my mind,
You’d see a character
I had ever failed to become
If you could read my mind,
You’d be able to read
A book you never wished
To touch and read,
But sometimes I still wish
Someone could read my mind.