...and every single day you're gone hurts more. i don't know what to do, i've lost my purpose. my name, when you don't say it, is forgotten. my face, when you don't look at it, is blurred. i couldn't recognize myself these days, a shadow that protects your endless sleep. i've tortured you for years, but now you haunt my dreams and all my life's forever yours to keep.
People say you my match Coz we will play match of love In which no medals But life will be on its peddles I say you babe Coz you will be my patience testing lab If I pass you will give me babe If I fail my life will be hell I say you friend Coz we will share good and bad You never let me alone And sad The line of our mutual respect will always be green And I pledge it will never be red
don’t blame me, it’s not my fault. you’re afraid of the decisions you have to make. you’re obsessed with what isn’t yours to take. you’re tired of the confidence you have to fake. you’re ashamed of the way that you break. stand in your place, and don’t blame.
and the coward points their rot finger at someone else, hoping that this will make them more brave. but blaming doesn’t purify, it keeps rotting them from inside
Living feels like I’m constantly raging against the nothingness of existing, like I’m living with all the bounds of humanity, that mean nothing, to find a purpose to waking up, and breathing and being, other than slowly dying along the way.
And I spend all my energy trying to build a bridge between the duality of life and death, that constantly keeps me a raging builder and an awful architect.
My ex-girlfriend and I used to play this game, I guess we made it up, called Sing That For Real. So at any time, when one of us said "sing (a song) for real" the other person had to sing it. With sincerity. Whether it was playing or not. Had to put their best effort into it, without any humor or undue theatrics behind it. Any song. You had to just sing the portion of it that you knew to the best of your ability. In public, alone, didn't matter. Over the phone. We would tell each other thru text sometimes. Sure, you could get away with not doing it and the other person would never know. But I never did. I always sang.
Because it wasn't really a game. It was a trick. A ruse to get the other person to open themselves up. To be vulnerable in front of you. Honest with you. To break yourself open--if only slightly, if only for a moment--without fear of judgement or insecurity. Without hiding behind humor or parody, to sing directly into the face of the person you love. Or on their behalf. At their behest. Have a moment of tangible honesty between the two of you. Show that person that you aren't afraid of anything, at any time. Once, at a deli counter on A1A, I sang "Not Fade Away" directly into her eyes. She showed me a secret Beyonce taught her at a pet store in front of the fish tanks. We duetted on “You’re The One That I Want” on the trunk of my civic parked in a starlit cow field. It was a secret promise we made to each other. A private joke, almost.
She hung herself in her apartment 6 years ago today. She was high on *******. She was bi-polar. She was off her meds. She was scared of herself and everyone else. I picked her up. I cut the belt. I puked downstairs in her garden screaming. I loved her so much and I'll never stop singing for her.
I don’t want to Open my mouth Because I’m still afraid The truth might come out And if it does If it really breaks free You’ll see what I am You’ll see the true me The one I hide With jokes and lies I’m a terrible person All jokes aside You don’t seem to know it You don’t seem to see Even a glimpse of that person That I know to be me I’m such a good actress I hide it so well Cover it with a laugh And you’ll never tell You see depth in my eyes You see love and emotion But what would you see If I ever did open I can’t bear to find out I can’t bear to show The me you don’t see The me that I know If I let it out If I let it be I know for a fact That you would hate me.
I used to read your poems but lately you don't write you're silent and aloof you know that isn't right. You can't close a door once opened you can't abolish all your dreams you're a poet of the heart mustn't fall apart at the seams. Say what you can in words they speak the message true spoken from the heart the poems will see you through. A hermit's not your style a recluse, you are not never give up writing of things that you've been taught. I used to read your poems I'd read them once again if you would send them out (this one's from a poet friend)
I feel you touching my heart And I feel your everlasting love every day And you’re in my heart to stay And I'm praying I'm smiling away and I feel Your peace and love that comes My way from your heart every day And I pray for the sick And suffer every night And I'll light a candle tonight And Lord Jesus Christ Here my prayer tonight Amen.
i adore cold weather. But not for the fires, Or the warmth of another person. I find something beautiful about it, And maybe even a bit lonely. It reminds me of bittersweet loss, And finding the strength to move on.
They said, "The most beautiful art is looking into someone's eyes when they talk about the things they love." And I said, "Or looking at someone you love. Or maybe, just maybe, by looking at the mirror is the most beautiful art anyone should appreciate."
Appreciation post for myself; for you and for everyone as well. You deserve more than the world has to offer.
Her embrace was a clinch to prevent hard blows. She pulled me close to push me away. Seeing my nakedness she leant me a dream of chainmail and shield. Taking love from me she gave a reprieve to a mind resigned to the slow death of feeling.
Ignoring my words she heard my faint silent heartbeat and understood that it was music too quiet for the world to hear and turned it up louder than I could stand. I wept in my deafness as she danced.
I love him I tell myself I know that We will be together forever I don’t believe that We could be separated My thoughts tell me that He’s the love of my life Sometimes my heart lies and says I could live an eternity Without him Like my friends say “We’re perfect for each other” And you can’t tell me He’s not the one.
Whether a comma, or colon: Punctuation slows my rolling I need no period. When I end no Capitalization when I begin Rulelessly I flow my art Not a single! Exclamation mark Are you not the one Who'll know? Where a question mark No longer goes
Warp the structure Bend the lines Put in repeat Let emotion unwind Make yourself Your poetry's the best Be your own ruler Pass your own test
Take your own road Where ever it leads Lover or hater It's all poetry!
Traveler Tim .
Hay No matter who you are You have my deepest respect!
Vanity All is vanity The meanings of passion The aesthetic expression The lines we draw and stay within Even love is beyond intent Vanity transcends Flowing from our pens And so we breathe again
When I was a young girl I wondered If I would find you. I looked in the grass, on the horizon, where the land woke up each day. I dreamed of your darkness, of your hands sculpted by David, your laugh.
I was younger then than I wish I had been. I saw your curls in the glass of my future, your amber eyes stolen from the Baltic. You guarded my time telling me that of course I was happy once but my mother took me / away. She watched me for you on every corner of Chicago. Looked for your blue eyes in the stranger she finally married.
But he wasn't you and the penalty was high. My youth was her batter which mixed with gin and codeine she drank daily.
I found you in a hallway walking toward me. It was on a holiday granted to me once. I knew you before the world was made. The glimpse of your silent betrayal left me envying younger women Before. I knew you In the hours of my life at last,
When I was a young woman you found me. I was braille, you were soft. You left me in the tears of another waif the dust blew in.
I am wide awake... For the moon light is bathing my window... So my eyes are fixed on that sweet light... All I can imagine is you looking at the sky... With the two stars that your eyes are... That is why the moon is illuminated tonight... The moon is happy because perhaps you are looking at it... So happy it projects that sweet light that will be my company for the night... You bring happiness and sweet thoughts...