This long life has been
informed by love.  We shared
each other Oh! for so
short a time.

Like fruit we hung onto
the sweet drops of new
nectar's night.
We peeled each other
to the pink skin of sighs.

It was a delicate scent
when blown into the
stars quiet Space.  We
sped into the walls of
destiny and crashed
in the pulp of sorrow.

But I miss you in this
orchard of dessicated
memories.

I am rawed by the thought
of you.

Caroline Shank

I can feel it in my fingertips.

Death feels so lovely and I can feel it

On the outer rims of my cuticles.

I feel it when I'm by the sides of cliffs

Staring at Beauty.

I feel it on the edges of the road when my hands

Feel the urge to pull to a cruel abyss.

I'm learning I need to walk away from edges

And canyons where parting is such sweet sorrow

But necessary.

I feel it in my lover's bed

And whether I am drunk or sober.

I feel it vibrate so close to the frame of my skeleton.

It haunts me, tethering me to its

Majestic and convoluted love.

And I won't step inside it.

I pull over.

I walk away.

I avoid alcohol.

I learn to love myself

The tiniest bit.

All for Jonathan.

i want to love you
like a lazy sunday morning
staying in bed
taking our time
sipping coffee
memorising every freckle
like the constellations in the sky
white sheets
and tangled limbs
with the scent of a memory
fresh on our lips.

I never thought I’d find a snore so comforting.

But it proves to me every moment you’re still laying beside me.

I used to read your poems
but lately you don't write
you're silent and aloof
you know that isn't right.
You can't close a door once opened
you can't abolish all your dreams
you're a poet of the heart
mustn't fall apart at the seams.
Say what you can in words
they speak the message true
spoken from the heart
the poems will see you through.
A hermit's not your style
a recluse, you are not
never give up writing
of things that you've been taught.
I used to read your poems
I'd read them once again
if you would send them out
(this one's from a poet friend)

It's crazy, and it's soon
But it's real and it's true
She makes me want to show her every day
In every way
By the things I do and the things I say
By the things I think and feel and pray
That I am hers
Always

they said, if it hurts you,
then it's not worth you,

then why do I want you to stay,
even if just to hurt me

I spend too many nights thinking
Wondering, writing, dreaming
Of someone who doesn't even think of me

i still
do not know
the poem i've been trying to write
and maybe
that's because
i haven't been
writing one at all
or maybe it's because
the poem i've been trying to write
is not ready for paper
and maybe
i'm the paper
that's not ready for it

Dandelion is such you are not alone.
whose delicacies is yours,
And the elegance is either.

Huff It
through the green field,
And it's spinning
around the world.
Surely everywhere it would have stepped in
At the time of the gloom or joy that you were running,
It happened in the fields.
For it's being a caressing to the blushed cheeks of the child's.

Let not the night blind you
nor darken your mind's eyes.
But see past the tapestry of darkness
And see the majestic dyes
The poetry of its presence
Soars across the skies.
And if you dare to embrace it
In your respite touch it
And dream forever and ever.
And then waken to its demise.

The times that go by
Take away a part of me
I slowly fade
In the fog of memories

She harbors resilience as the
skies cast shadows on
adversities endured,
flourishing evermore
- she lives.

A bed of red roses,
With covers from heaven,
We lay on the bed,
Thinking of forever.
You and me,
And our families together.
Thinking of forever,
Our kids growing up,
Taking care of us,
And laughing at our jokes.
As we lay in the bed,
And hold each other near,
We see this dream is real,
Real as can be.
As you can see,
Together is our comfort zone,
Because no matter where we go,
No matter what we do,
I will always be thinking about forever with you.

i spend my days
pouring myself into the cups of others

only to find that
when it’s time for myself
to take a sip

all that’s left
in my cup
is the remainder of a girl
who gave too much

She said "I'm falling in love."

I said "I'm falling apart."

Rise and fall
Never stop,
but it is ok to stall


© 2021 Carol Natasha Diviney

A lost soul I will be,
wondering where to go.
Till I find my luck.
Felted the love around me.
The good vibes surrounding me
and I now it was something from heaven
that give me the strenght, the strongness,
that I need in my life.
I'm grateful and humble for it.
Because it will give me what I needed
to survive.

I traced the texture of your words
Like my heart was blind
And your voice was braille

My entire life,
I have been waiting.
For years,
Almost two decades now
I have been waiting.
Waiting,
For the better parts.
Waiting,
For the “soon”.
Waiting,
For my life to begin.
Because,
I don’t feel like I have lived.
In the nearly twenty years
I have been alive
And breathing
I do not feel
In any of those years
That I have been alive.
I don’t feel like a single breath
That I have taken
Has been real.
I feel as if
All these years
I’ve been stuck
Behind a window
Watching as my life unfolds
Before me.
I feel that
I have had
Zero control.
That I am in the backseat
Letting someone else drive.
That someone else,
Is writing on the pages
Of MY life.
But no more.
I will break that window,
I will take that wheel,
And I will write
My own pages.
My life has begun,
And now -
I’m in control.

She was a thrifted sweater and denim and jersey knit sheets
Pizza breath and red wine and toothpaste
Alabaster skin and knotted hair and freckled shoulders
A tangible dream and my favorite good morning
She agreed to let me kiss her and I agreed to let her slip my shirt over my head before she became
Blood and tears
"I trusted you" and "I’m sorry"
Midnight poems and a drunk "I need you"
I’m afraid I loved you like the way I wrote

I'm sinking farther into the sea
Air cut off, unable to breathe

But it's not all too bad
The water's warm
and the fish look nice

It's a shame I can only see this
By myself
at the end.

It wasn't like in the movie
Time didn't stop
No music played
when you walked into to my life
I wasn't blinking
for a split second can't be missed

I had a hard time deciding
where I sit
when I sit with you
cuz I wanted to watch you eat
and I wanted you beside me at the same time

My sister said "yes, your heart skipped a beat
but it isn't a heart desease,
cuz boy, you are in a much bigger trouble"
And I didn't get what she said
No one told me what's it like being in love

But I sat in the middle of the night,
writing poems about you
I was listening to songs
every single one dedicating to you
and every pretty thing I saw
reminded me of you

I never missed to smell your hair
I would kiss your hand at every chance
Every joke was to make you smile

Now I see you in the smoke I blew outside the window
Years ago, if someone told me about this
I would mock at them,
saying "move on, don't make it big a deal"
Now it is two years later,
my hands on the letters,
pressing one by one as I'm thinking of you
and one by one, the moments reappear
I still feel you all over me, touch by touch
but we've walked away from each other, step by step
I have to admit that tonight I moved one inch back to you
and I think I've been doing this inch by inch
but when I look around,
I'm in the same place as the last time I checked
when I thought I walked away


I might've chuckled dryly at the irony
I was right where I left you,


Right where I left you.

I heard so many birds last week

It snowed the other day

I can't hear the birds anymore

You came into my life in an instant
We were so close yet I feel distant

You give smile when we talk
But can we really walk the talk?

Finding you must be right
But the timing of today is not quite

No one is to blame
I'm just feeling sane

my arm is numb
my fingers tingly

i think this must be
a friendly reminder of my
mortality

gently, i respond
"no need, sir
i am a walking
existential crisis

fear of death
and i are well
acquainted"

You.
Are.
A.
Walking.
Masterpiece.

I always think
then
I always realize
don't you

I chicken out
here
and then grasping
limieux

Hockey that is
puck
squirting away to you
pew pew pew