~dedicated to the old poets here~

the addictive pairing of certain words, a line,
a lyric, slap-snapping you to full attention,
unfailing decades of instant recognition,
an adrenaline + caffeine shot that powers

a chance, a tensile injection that causes

the lips to commence a new choreography,
the fingers to tap, a jumbled, hurried, embattled
disorderly mess that regenerates, reformulates,
concords into agreement, a harmonic consistency

a geometry of many differing angles that equate

a hard physical, a soft mentality in a singled work,
coexisting in a sacred state of singed confluence,
though imperfect, satisfies mathematical boundaries
of a random outpouring, crowning the stripe inspiring

the spark that finally satisfyingly silences an ignited

filament a-glowing for years, that holy happens
to cross your antennae, fulfilling the need to honor,
the sacred geometry of chance, the honor to need,
the joy of saying, at last, this unwritten debt, paid!


————————————————————————-
(1) a favorite of many years, a lyric from “The Shape of My Heart” by Sting

(2) Dec 3 2020 2:53pm  NYC

I've never had the privilege to be
the main character
never enough for a leading role

always bleeding plain red
instead of magic

I am stuck in the trappings of poetry.
I have an exam to answer at 8 am.
I read and rejoice.
But I am sure
that I'll be overwhelmed
by regret in the morning.

The snow is falling
on the dawn of our love
I suffer through it, though
you suffer more.

Where do you exist now?
If no longer in the void
of my lost heart,
lost once, when I lost you

For you, my first words written
now a 1000 words
I wish to say, but first
je cherche pour ton visage

Blood I gave first,
then the taste for your thirst
my life was created by you-
now my cards fall away

into silence...


Jennifer Alé

Thread counted in linen robes,
his thatch of hair an areole.
Armored tight against the world,
with metered calm and stoicism.
Freckles, scars, lashed eyelids.
Both hard and soft,
all that he is.

Doubt. You're a monster,
That I have to overcome.
you lie in bed and pillow talk with my loved ones,
your soft screams in their ears
I can hear you from across the room
you could be my motivation
or you could be my doom.
Doubt you're my Tinnitus
the constant ringing in my ears
no matter what I do you never disappear.
I could give you diamonds and gold
or the silk off my back
I could give to the poor
or win myself a plaque,
but even then,
I'm still not enough..
Doubt you are forever hungry
you are my crying child I can not touch.

The color of the cream
As it is bled
from the cows in my dream
Also in red

Unfurling, curling,
bended, distended

A color so bright
It demands its own vase
So tired at night
Cannot lift its own face

you're my signature tune
favorite phase of the moon
sweet tea in June
always gone too soon

Oh, the joyous day of our first breath.

Oh, the joyous day of our freedom.

Oh, the joyous day of our first day of understanding.

Oh, the joyous day of our first dreams.

Oh, the saddened day of our first heartbreak.

Oh, the saddened day of our first contemplation.

Oh, the saddened day of our first suffocation.

Oh, the saddened day of our first bad habits.

Oh, the saddened day of our last breath.

Now read it from bottom to top.

a radiant light
so dazzling and inhuman
oh gods have mercy

scaring the livestock
in the meadows, all bright eyed
lands heaven forgot

one vengeful angel
delivering false sermons
oh gods have mercy

causing only harm
he’s turning into a snake,
turning on his charm

intimidating
beautiful, terrifying
oh gods have mercy

I see you in my sleep.
I hear you in my sleep.
And you're nowhere near.

I wake up with you on my mind.
I dream of you all the time.
And this suits me fine.

I speak of you.
I talk about you.
And you're nowhere near.

But if you were here?
I will be silent in professing my love for you.

Cohen wrote of broken praises,
and Shakespeare of unchanging light.
Aurelius of unyielding ways;
Descartes of impossible sights.

An ironic Socrates goes
on to fetch the hemlock cup,
while Nietzsche wanders on to rot,
content, he never drank hemlock.

But now what am I supposed to
believe– which truth is really clear?
When I see your gorgeous eyes– blue
I remember only Virgil, dear:

“Amor vincit omnia, et nos cedamus amori”
The only truth I’ve ever seen.

let me lay a kiss upon your temple

count your freckles, soft skin so simple

It's a wonder how others
Can sometimes look at us
better than we see ourselves.
The darkness we fight
Obscures a brighter view.
Thoughts hidden from sight,
And feelings concealed,
Portrayed as right,
Are not beliefs that others
Gather to be true

i want to stand in torrential storms and scream
until my lungs become ash and the rain has eroded the world around me
~who wants to join?

Step right up and hit the girl!
She belongs to you anyways.
Girl for sale! Girl for sale!
Too bad she's worth dirt.
Extra, extra, read all about it!
Auction today, all the girls you could ever want!
It doesn't matter how they feel.
You're in control.
A new toy comes along, replacing me.
Don't worry. I'll wait in the trash for you to get bored.

Tell me,

what are the things that fascinate you most?

Things that make your eyes sparkle aglow,

that soothe your awry, unrest, stirred soul.

Some are fascinated with their fiery, burning passion of life,

and some others are fascinated with their own death.

I am one of the latter.

You’re asleep
I should be too
I’m not okay
Nor are you
But days with you feel better
Dreams with you feel sweeter
You give feeling to a gray world
Thank you

i stutter and fidget,
searching for words and for phrases that make sense
i'm twisting my jacket, pulling my hair
my teeth clash together and my tongue gets in the way
and nothing really comes of it,
i give them no reason to stay.

i love you,
and to prove it,
i need to end myself?
it's not  that I'm scared,
but i would die,
not knowing,
if you smiled,
when you knew,
i loved you more than myself

I have found peaceful sleep on concrete floors
Where my desires have been needs
And had restless nights on feather soft beds
Where dreams of wants have piled with greed
They ask how people become mad
And I tell them
Look, like this
By doing business with dreams

mere separation cannot keep us apart
for your voice is in the song of every bird
your warmth in every  beat of my heart

Grey of days
Nights of told
Spin of wheels
Clouds of cold

Black of days
Rise to know
Awake of cover
Hands bellow

Red of days
Warmth of freeze
Doves to call
Begin the breeze

Green of days
Depth of roots
Flow what tears
Arrow that shoots

Packing up the memories to the corner of my mind
where they will collect dust until I decide
I am ready to unpack the thought of
you no longer by my side.

The stars don’t feel
They just exist
without regard for you
or your perception of them
They are raw energy
explosive chaos
bound only to the cold grip of
Time
Free of their shackles
they unleash hell
ancient flames
devouring worlds
that you will never know
or care
existed

Beyond your sight
the apocalypse means
nothing
From a distance
the universe is pretty
And our little star
shines on
a beacon of safety
warm and comfortable
until one day
it isn’t

your name is
forbidden in
my mouth
or in my heart
because when
i think about
you;

i'll cry a little more,
hurt a little stronger
love a little softer
because you no longer
make me feel sober

i'm drunk on the
memory of you

Meeting of the board members