I stared today at rough-hewn hands while lost in troubled thought.
Memories of wrongs they’ve touched and happiness they’ve fought.
Foolish choices, and choices not, were villains all the same.
My hands, it seemed, the sculptors of a gallery of pain.

Pondering these tragedies, my mind adrift and cluttered.
When suddenly a butterfly from the darkness fluttered.
And through my aching self-despair her hopeful glow transgressed.
Upon my wretched fingertip she gently came to rest.

She looked at me and turned her head, I followed with my own.
Her eyes began to smile at me with love I’d never known.
The warmth of her affection spread and overwhelmed my fear.
I saw her lips begin to move and brought her to my ear.

“These hands of yours you gaze upon are gentle, as you see.
I trust in you with all I am that they will not hurt me.
Actions taken, others’ tears are not one and the same.
The strength of caring does not have to carry with it blame.”

I whispered back “How do you know this gentleness is true?
I’ve never heard such lovely things from anyone but you.”
“Then I will stay, right here,” she said, “if you will hold me tight.
Keep me safe with loving hands and I will be your light.”

I owe to her my everything for now I understand,
How magnificence personified could love these troubled hands.
I’ve held her close, my life and back, and though I’d lost my way.
I’ve found my light, she is my love, my hope, my every day.

I watch the city burn
Through the vignette windows
Of tear-gassed souls.

And hell's fire ablaze
Between cracks of tears
Of childhood fears

Time will always fade away,
as I'm close to you.
Where all the seconds go,
is too far for me to see.

Only a couple seconds away,
babe you have me second guessing myself.

As I write this in a couple seconds,
the minute has past me a few.
Words like the time
feel endless by every line.

Only in the couple seconds,
I'm in the second half of this love game.

The free field, the blowing
of my hair, the waving
and flowing of the grass

Only obey myself
No water surface, nothing
shines but your eyes

to make me feel beautiful
I despise seducing
in see-through clothes

I spit on being beautiful
to be counted
I disgust being beautiful

and therefore not be counted
I too walk the world!
I too do a lot of work there!

I too oversee what happens
I too know the people
and I talk wisely with you

Hello there
familiar stranger...

Between the waking hours
and persistent unsleep,

you’re still
as much as the chaos
in my head then
as you are now.

I used to read your poems
but lately you don't write
you're silent and aloof
you know that isn't right.
You can't close a door once opened
you can't abolish all your dreams
you're a poet of the heart
mustn't fall apart at the seams.
Say what you can in words
they speak the message true
spoken from the heart
the poems will see you through.
A hermit's not your style
a recluse, you are not
never give up writing
of things that you've been taught.
I used to read your poems
I'd read them once again
if you would send them out
(this one's from a poet friend)

two young boys stood before a mirror
appearances different, this quite clear
nonetheless they became best friends
one by one world full of bigotry ends

as they grew life took them apart
miles can’t change what’s in your heart
kept in touch over a span of years
shared times of laughter, cried many tears

each had a family with kids of their own
taught their children love must be shown
skin does not matter in the making of a man
create a world where bigotry's banned

two old men stood before a mirror
friendship they grew couldn’t be clearer
in a time of hatred we must make amends
one by one world full of bigotry ends

when I told my therapist that I felt lonely,
she said in response that
she didn’t want to belittle my experience
and I only half-heartedly believed her
when she told me that we all feel lonely,

but darlin’ I know you’re so lonely.

I’m sick of wasting daylight inside—******* my blinds, with this filthy skin wrapped around my mind.

Shadows Interlaced
With a Crimson Horizon
A Heron (undaunted)

I traced the texture of your words
Like my heart was blind
And your voice was braille

a flood of emotions
but i will only catch the hopeful
another day, another way
i can look for the better version
of myself
yes, there is hurt
but one day at a time
a few good words on my mirror
and we will see
what happens

More than what you think and what you know
More than what’s on a chart or rap sheet
I’m just me what’s my size height or the way I breathe got anything to do with the way that I believe and the way that I think
It’s become more difficult to express concerns when there’s all these labels out here to define us
It’s been about the status and the things that we own
There’s no price check on my soul
Let me be I’m just me
- tired

I love your freshly shaven face
with pale eyes like a storm
soft and new
sprinkled with dewy youthful radiance

having two versions of you

sandpaper and rough-skinned
salt and pepper beard
explaining life's experience in various grey hues
fingers follow deep lined wrinkles
the path to your lips

i spend my days
pouring myself into the cups of others

only to find that
when it’s time for myself
to take a sip

all that’s left
in my cup
is the remainder of a girl
who gave too much

My entire life,
I have been waiting.
For years,
Almost two decades now
I have been waiting.
Waiting,
For the better parts.
Waiting,
For the “soon”.
Waiting,
For my life to begin.
Because,
I don’t feel like I have lived.
In the nearly twenty years
I have been alive
And breathing
I do not feel
In any of those years
That I have been alive.
I don’t feel like a single breath
That I have taken
Has been real.
I feel as if
All these years
I’ve been stuck
Behind a window
Watching as my life unfolds
Before me.
I feel that
I have had
Zero control.
That I am in the backseat
Letting someone else drive.
That someone else,
Is writing on the pages
Of MY life.
But no more.
I will break that window,
I will take that wheel,
And I will write
My own pages.
My life has begun,
And now -
I’m in control.

No matter how hard I try and try
There is no end
Things keep happening on replay
I just want it to end

Have you ever seen
a car crash?
Would you ride
that same car
after turning back in time,
after seeing the future possibility?
Would you risk the tragedy?

You are the dream
forbidden to me—
too poignant, too peaceful—
too perfect to fall into;
but how could I dare,
dare I resist?
the only dream I’ve
ever wanted to fall into.

Certain that I don’t want to fall;
Certain that I want this.
Certain that I will fall;
Certain that I’m not fooled.
Certainly, the dream is everything;
and I’m certain everything will be ending.

She was a thrifted sweater and denim and jersey knit sheets
Pizza breath and red wine and toothpaste
Alabaster skin and knotted hair and freckled shoulders
A tangible dream and my favorite good morning
She agreed to let me kiss her and I agreed to let her slip my shirt over my head before she became
Blood and tears
"I trusted you" and "I’m sorry"
Midnight poems and a drunk "I need you"
I’m afraid I loved you like the way I wrote

I'm sinking farther into the sea
Air cut off, unable to breathe

But it's not all too bad
The water's warm
and the fish look nice

It's a shame I can only see this
By myself
at the end.

She said "I'm falling in love."

I said "I'm falling apart."

There are approximately 470,000 words in the English language

4 syllables in “Hey, How are you?”

9 letters in “Beautiful”

3 words in “I love you”

And still

I can’t find a single thing to say

When your smile accidentally makes my day.

healing is a heart itching.

You.
Are.
A.
Walking.
Masterpiece.

Check message
Facebook
Check message
Instagram
Check message
Send message
Wait
Check
Look;

When did relationships
Get defined
By a read receipt?
Will we
Now
Only measure intimacy
By a tweet?

What do we have left,
Why can’t we
Go back
To laughter
In a diner seat

You broke your own heart
by the risky knife of love
and now you bleed
so you stitch it
with thread of all
painful yet so precious
memories of him.

Go on,
crowned warrior.
be braver,
for all wounds heal
when patched
with what bleeds heart.

your name is
forbidden in
my mouth
or in my heart
because when
i think about
you;

i'll cry a little more,
hurt a little stronger
love a little softer
because you no longer
make me feel sober

i'm drunk on the
memory of you

If you could read my mind,
You’d see a thousand papers
Filled with broken poetries
And deadbeat proses
Full of woeful verses
With mournful pieces
Of unfinished stories
That are yet to be written
And failed to be spoken;
If you could read my mind,
You’d hear horrible screams
And earsplitting weeps
From shattered dreams,
Kept in a nasty notepad,
Scribbled on a bed
Of bloodstained words,
Ringing in my head.
If you could read my mind,
You’d see the shadows
That lurk within me;
You’d hear the bellows,
Screeching the words
“I’m tired,”
“I’m a failure,”
“I’m stupid –”
I know it sounds stupid,
It’s pathetically foolish
And seems like *******.
If you could read my mind,
You’d feel the tears
I had ever failed to cry;
You’d see the people
That make the weak weaker;
You’d see the monsters
That consume my head;
You’d hear the hollers
That failed to be freed;
You’d see the heart
That still bleeds and bleeds.
If you could read my mind,
You’d see the face
I’ve failed to show back then,
The face I’ve faked back then.
If you could read my mind,
You’d see a character
I had ever failed to become
If you could read my mind,
You’d be able to read
A book you never wished
To touch and read,
But sometimes I still wish
Someone could read my mind.

I love him
I tell myself
I know that
We will be together forever
I don’t believe that
We could be separated
My thoughts tell me that
He’s the love of my life
Sometimes my heart lies and says
I could live an eternity
Without him
Like my friends say
“We’re perfect for each other”
And you can’t tell me
He’s not the one.

Now read from bottom to top.

If I die today
Not much in the world would change
A clump of cells gone,
Dreams extinguished, Love dissolved
Bookshelves left to rot.
Loved ones crying will move on
God knows where I'd be
Might as well take it easy
Enjoy what's left of my time