Trudging through murky waters
It reaches up to my ankles
I know it goes deeper
But I'm waiting for the reaper
I feel it creeping up my legs, creating slippery tangles
My wet hair clinging to me in mangles
I slowly get pulled down
Waiting for myself to drown
Devoid of emotion
I'm pulled into an ocean
I feel nothing anymore
My feet are sore
From walking on this slippery floor
Please stop the pain
Before I go insane
8/5/21

And here we are
the end.

Five years running
and nothing to show

except the slowed
platonic love

and tired
texts

and an absence
of what once was

Except you don't know
do you

know that I'm
leaving us

know that I'm
panicked

into wondering
if I'm behind in
people

experiencing people

I feel I'm at a loss
with you

because we met each other
too soon

and now I'm just pointed bones

and you are the sun

and I'm greedy
for still wanting a piece of you

But I am burnt

The End.

(deepdeepdeep in the cut)



beautiful girls with long braids
quiet boys with tears in their eyes
yellow birds
and pink trees

flutes and drums and haunting strings
drifting smoke
sleepy cats
blanket on blanket on blanket

people
don’t understand
spirals

it’s not something i do
because
i’m not living in the moment or
because
i refuse to attend to practical matters

i spiral
because in
every moment of
every day
my mind is
seeing and
feeling and
embracing
the biggest struggles
and smallest victories
of everyone around me

heartbreak
tears
years of hard work
dreams come true
my brain is a sponge
in the ocean wave of life

look around
the world is a whirlpool
of infinite possibilities and
of infinite reasons
to sit and think for awhile

it’s only natural
to be pulled
under

It feels like my wrists are burning
Blood is dripping down my arms
My head keeps screaming
I shouldn't of self-harmed.
My mom is going to be mad.
She's going to hit me again.
Give me another bruise.
Now my scars have some friends.
Just wash off the blood.
Dry off with the towel.
Wrap up your arms.
Go back to your personal bubble.
Isolate yourself for another week little girl.
Take you medicine.
And jump off the hill.

If only getting over you was
as easy as
Remembering your name

The moment someone knows me
The moment someone sees
I exist
I am present
I am back to being me

And so I go where noone knows me
To where I'm openly not seen
To not exist for a few hours
Is such a blessing
Not to be

While lilies are asleep
Her dream has taken its wings
A promise of spring

The way you stand
The way you sit
The way you secretly laugh for a bit
You’ve been hurt
You’ve been broken
And yet your heart is wide open
You think no one sees
You think no one cares
But that is really just not fair
Because I see
Because I do
My heart is filled by just looking at you

took a bottle from the cupboard
then she tilted back his head
this meant trouble, he discovered
when she read out what it said

it said hazardous to health
twice as poisonous as bleach
keep it on the highest shelf
keep it out of children’s reach

treat like pepper spray or mace
or an acid that could maim
store it in a cool, dry place
and avoid all naked flames

the instructions then suggested
it could leave him stiff and pale
if by chance it was ingested
if by chance he did inhale

then its pungent, toxic odour
from its allergens, writ BOLD
burned his nose like caustic soda
made his nostrils yearn for cold

since the content seemed unstable
so she handled with a glove
but she let him read the label
and the word he saw was LOVE

held his nose and told him ‘swallow’
made him chug it in one go
and the pain was quick to follow
why she did it, hard to know

felt like acid ingestion
not a gentle warmth inside
so he asked the girl a question
‘is an antidote supplied?’

she said ‘there’s no medication
just a long and slow decline
there’s no cure or vaccination
you can only pray for time’

and that pain he still remembers
since his stomach’s still upset
just a pit of glowing embers
from that girl he can’t forget.

Dear Reader,
if you're reading this
it means
I'm dead
as a paper

free

to be etched
with the poem
I tried to write
so many times
when I was m-

Whether a comma, or colon:
Punctuation slows my rolling
I need no period. When I end
no Capitalization when I begin
Rulelessly I flow my art
  Not a single!
Exclamation mark
Are you not the one
Who'll know?
Where a question mark
No longer goes

Warp the structure
Bend the lines
Put in repeat
Let emotion unwind
Make yourself
Your poetry's the best
Be your own ruler
Pass your own test

Take your own road
Where ever it leads
Lover or hater
It's all poetry!

☾

Yesterday I cried to the moon
as she wiped my tears away
made my worries disappear
so I could sleep again.

☼

Today I smile at the sun
and it shines back on me,
what a wonderful world
to be alive;
to be me.

it was the last time
you ever kissed me goodnight
the day the moon fell