O Lord search me, inside and out then heal me.

I beg thee , O Lord to search me and to heal me.

Not only I, heal but everyone that reads this too.

For this world is hurting and needs your Healing.

Heal our lands, heal our bodies, heal our children.

Then all shall see you O Lord and let a revival begin.

Thus then bring all nations unto your throne room.

Repenting of their sins, asking you to come into their hearts.

Thus many more including world leaders as well God.

you’re not

unworthy

of love.

they weren’t

just worthy

of yours.

I'll wait for you like she could have

I'll protect you like she should have.

I'll fix that heart of yours that she shattered.

I'll love you.

Just let me treat you like you deserve,
and i'll love you as long as you let me.

I cannot be with him
Nor I can leave him
The mere thought of not being able to talk to him
Hurts my heart
I feel this pain
A grave loss
But I must be brave
Because at the end of the pain
Is freedom.

Jesus bless my fellow brothers and sisters poet.
Heal their hearts, bless the words that come out..
Of their mouths today and everyday Lord God.
Use them to encourage everyone that they meet.
Work Great miracles in their lives today and always.
Bless their hearts with great volume of love over flowing.
Overwhelm them with your great love and faithfulness.
Do what only you can do Lord and use them overwhelming.

Not the stillness
but the never-ending motion
not on the head of a pin
but in base of the broad basin
not a perfect evenness
but the wealth of variance

Not two opposing pebbles
laid on a lever atop a pivot
not a balance
more
like a train car
arriving at the station
where people board and disembark
while their total never changes

Similarly
not good opposing evil
not black and white
or self against the other
more
the summation of the ins and outs
of all that simultaneously occur
when nothing ever happens

can give life
and one person
and take life away

One Person
can create
a beautiful masterpiece
or destroy the hope and joy
in a child’s loving, trusting face

One Person
can build this country up
or tear this country down
One vote
can make the difference
as to our future
if that vote is sound

One Person
can change your life
forever –
if given the permission to

One Person
can do many things

One Person
is you

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.




Since I could not stop the pain,
I just taught myself to love it.




It is working :>




I cut the flesh that covers me
I cut the only thing that truly protects me


Then there is blood.


Red. Vibrant. Brave.
That was the last beautiful thing that I saw


Til my eyes are no longer heavy
Tears burst like they wanna come out for years
--


Then there was my wrist, pumping heavily
As always
I wonder why I have this very shallow pulse
That you could easily notice in one look

I have a two sided sword
But in a cute size


Nah, it gives the same satisfaction of pain.


Billie Eilish songs overpowered the silence



I love this.




My definition of peace and pleasure came into the form of violence.


~~~~~~~~~

ZZzzzzzz....



Awaken, I heard the other ego
Saying go
you will love it.



I wish I was alive.


The bells rang, I had to go.

"It's not love."

Okay, sure,
so suppose I were to concede.
Then you're positing that
more than half the love I've ever received
has always and forever been null.

She has a skeleton in her closet,
one that haunts her everyday.
It calls her name, and tortures her
with words sharp as shards of bone
broken off a decaying soul.

With your coloured ribbons
you look so nice and
friendly
and when I touch your skin
it makes me wonder
what people ask for

and I step back to get
a good look at you
and wonder
what will I ask for?

And when it comes to me it is
the most peaceful feeling
ever-
that I ask for
nothing
because I know
everything is already
in motion and
coming to me.

but I’m still haunted by the memories
your love was like ecstasy

now it’s crashing down
I’m a fool, I’m a clown
I fell hard for your lies
now I have to deal with the side effects of that temporary high

I have this dream
That you’re here with me
We live by the sea
And we are happy

love is a drug;
once you have a taste
you can't get enough.
maybe that's why I am afraid,
afraid to take a sip,
a bite,
a whiff,
of love,
i might overdose.

Her knuckles red
made tight around her
bouquet
as she prepares
to fasten herself
to him.

She is an orchid
midsummer bloom
and blowing into
Autumn.

Last night she lingered
on the egde of a dream
cats eyes
forest green

Trees trembling
Summer solstice
those women in hats
dancing

Spinning into the night.
He presses himself
into her palm.
Its just us now
He says.

Life is precious
not because of its brevity
but rather more in
its meaning and utility.

I am just a drop of rain
That you flick away
I am the sun in summer
When you stay in the shade
I am the barren tree of winter
When you only photograph the fall
I feel like a bother to you,
Or nothing at all

You’re a kleptomaniac but you couldn’t steal my heart
You tried and tried and tried until I tore your scheme apart
We weren’t to be together and I’m so very okay with that
Because I’m in love with someone else and one day I’ll win them back

I have acted courageously many times in my life, and I am capable of becoming a man of true courage

I have succeeded at many things in my life and I am capable of achieving great success in all areas that are important to me

I am an imperfect but good man.  I will continue to do my best to be a blessing to others.

Although I may not see the path now, I believe that I will find the way to overflowing happiness/peace/joy.

I lie in bed
Clearing my head
Thinking that it will fade
All the love that I held

Tonight it will end.

One is never weakest
     when they think they  

have fallen.

But one must show that
every footstep  is a motion
                 to rise.


Proving  that no matter
the steps we fall down.


There are always fresh ones
                untrodden,

that will let us climb higher


            than before.

Haiku
A season is over
Golden leaves softly fall
The breeze is absent.

Haiku
Bushes have the blooms
Still intact covered in dust
The town waits for storm

Haiku
Indoor plants sag too
Sorrowful for no reason
Longing for freedom

Haiku
Umbrellas await
Know their duty are coming
They have the courage

Eternity at the fingertips of the lost
Trying to keep all the liquid melting out of my heart inside
The gods have never seen a love like ours
Sunlit soft skin, blossoming warmth
Eyes dripping the moons pure shine

Is this what they call paradise?

Like a bird on the wire,
like a drunk in a midnight choir
I have tried in my way to be free.
Like a worm on a hook,
like a knight from some old fashioned book
I have saved all my ribbons for thee.
If I, if I have been unkind,
I hope that you can just let it go by.
If I, if I have been untrue
I hope you know it was never to you.
Like a baby, stillborn,
like a beast with his horn
I have torn everyone who reached out for me.
But I swear by this song
and by all that I have done wrong
I will make it all up to thee.
I saw a beggar leaning on his wooden crutch,
he said to me, "You must not ask for so much."
And a pretty woman leaning in her darkened door,
she cried to me, "Hey, why not ask for more?"
Oh like a bird on the wire,
like a drunk in a midnight choir
I have tried in my way to be free.

Struggling more and more
sinking deeper and deeper
the quicksand called man

             Kelly McManus

If you could read my mind,
You’d see a thousand papers
Filled with broken poetries
And deadbeat proses
Full of woeful verses
With mournful pieces
Of unfinished stories
That are yet to be written
And failed to be spoken;
If you could read my mind,
You’d hear horrible screams
And earsplitting weeps
From shattered dreams,
Kept in a nasty notepad,
Scribbled on a bed
Of bloodstained words,
Ringing in my head.
If you could read my mind,
You’d see the shadows
That lurk within me;
You’d hear the bellows,
Screeching the words
“I’m tired,”
“I’m a failure,”
“I’m stupid –”
I know it sounds stupid,
It’s pathetically foolish
And seems too *******.
If you could read my mind,
You’d feel the tears
I had ever failed to cry;
You’d see the people
That make the weak weaker;
You’d see the monsters
That consume my head;
You’d hear the hollers
That failed to be freed;
You’d see the heart
That still bleeds and bleeds.
If you could read my mind,
You’d see the face
I’ve failed to show back then,
The face I’ve faked back then.
If you could read my mind,
You’d see a character
I had ever failed to become
If you could read my mind,
You’d be able to read
A book you never wished
To touch and read,
But sometimes I still wish
Someone could read my mind.

I will go slowly

today, I am still giddy –


with the love you gave.

The wind is cold
The sun is warm
My feet are soar
My heart is numb

I've disappeared into myself
And reality seems
.
.
.
.
.
.
distant

keep your eyes closed love.

           e     t      
       m           i
    o                 m
s                        e  
                            s     all you have to
                                                                ­
                                                                ­ l                  is to what the sound
                                                           ­      i            n
                                                  ­                s           e
                                                               ­          t

                                                              ­                               v
                                                               ­                         a        e
                             ­                                          of the  w               s
                                                               ­                                       
                         ­                                                                 ­            tells  you
                                                                ­                                        to do.

I liked her red bikini
for what concealed
and what it revealed.

It matched her red hair,
curly and wild.

She had asked
two Moroccan men
to pose with her
and their camel
on the beach.

I didn't know
what their Qur'an said
about posing
with semi-clad women
for a few coins,
but they shyly smiled
as I took the photograph.

Why don't you put on
your swimming trunks?
she asked me.

I didn't bring any
with me,
I replied,
not thinking
about the sea.

You can always swim
in your birthday suit,
she suggested,
smiling.

I can't swim,
I said,
so no point.

She swam
and I sat on the sand
watching her,
smoking a cigarette.

Behind us
was the base camp,
and voices floated
down to us
from the bar.

I watched her
with a secret lust,
which I shouldn't have had,
but did, but kept
hidden like a wound,
bandaged by
my youthful deceit.

I looked away,
and down
at the dry sand
beneath my
all too human feet.

This is a place
A place called Hell
Everyone get whipped
At the sound of the bell
It does not matter
If you are black, white, or red
Because if you’re here
You’re already dead
No one cares what you wear
Way down here is all despair  
Down in hell we are all the same
If you can’t see this you’re to blame
Soon I will see you down in hell
And we'll all get whipped
At the sound of the bell

Musty old volume
an intelligence encased
brittle paper snaps




- fr

it was 4am when
i noticed his text.
“are you up?” he asked.
rubbing my eyes, i answered,
“yeah. need to talk?”
because anyone who is awake
at 4am is either heartbroken
or in love.