Extra kisses at dawn in the strawberry moon
Celestial wellness
Splendourous greetings

Written by
Jean C Bertrand

you with new moon eyes
and i without mind
between the echoes of screams
we lay here dreaming
you stare back at me
holding a ball of nails
while walls of fire
collapse about us

roused by medulla
fear manifest in blood
seeing and hearing
and ignoring the darkened world
internal chemical stimulus
separate from awareness
sparking the primitive
imperfect and savage brain

my pulsar heart
mirrors the flickering
of images and terror
that haunt my sleep
my black hole eyes
radiate oblivion
and swallow the light
I need to live

scenery so inticing ..
arms are holding my hand telling me not to let go ..
this area suddenly gets so cold
we fold , in half .. keeping us away from negative things that crosses our paths
finger nails scraping at backboards , and we are expected to listen to ...
nothing that matters to us ..
and I feel free right here .. right now
no listening to anyone but myself ..
and when I let go,
i am now happy
i am now free
free falling

sitting down in the shower
cliché but appealing,
if i could feel a fraction
of the things that they're feeling,
the things i've been hearing since
the day i grew ears.
looking for reasons to love yourself
and being told to scavenge
in someone else's clothes.

every year that passes
i've managed to convince myself
was just another mid life crisis,
because i'd be overwhelmed
with another 15, 20 years
or how long can a person last
convinced they'll find a romance
that distracts from how they hate themselves.

in love, yes
with people, no

more inclined, i think
to fall for experiences

and animals and trees
and the taste of coffee in the morning

and the feel of accomplishment
after a long night spent writing

in love, i am
with maybe some people

no one personal,
two idols at most

in love, yes
with people, no

more inclined, i think
to fall for the sunset

and a relieving gust of breeze
on a humid day

and the art hung
on the walls of rustic cafes

in love, yes
with no one in particular

in love with life
even on days spent wishing for its end

a toxic sort of love, perhaps
perfectly suited for the likes of me

chemically imbalanced,
in brain and body

I wasn't holding my hands against my hips to assert some sort of feminine dominance over our space
Or to passively shame you for the mess that you had made
I held my hands on my hips so that my body wouldn't split straight down the middle
Revealing two halves
Cause I know I'm supposed to be one whole

Always
And always

I never understood how everyone
Kept their halves sewn so close together
Until I realized
Most people are a singular construction

I'm holding my hands on my hips
Not out of confidence
I'm waiting for the split
I'll press harder when it happens
I'm holding my hands on my hips
To hold myself together

home alone,
i sit down on the kitchen floor,
cradling my heart in my hands.

i see your face in my mind,
and my heart shatters in my palms,
a few pieces cutting my fingers.

two-thirds of a bottle of jack later
i don't feel the pain anymore.
everything's hazy, everything's blur.

then your face floats up
out of my sub-conscious drunkenness
and my stupid heart starts to hurt again.

i finish the bottle in five quick swigs.
there's a burn in my chest,
but somehow it doesn't hurt as bad

as the wounds you left in your wake.
i fall asleep, cheek against
the cold tiled kitchen floor,

and stumble back into consciousness
the next morning, swearing and groaning,
but with the daylight comes

the clarity of the memories
i've been trying so hard to push away.

It's not from first or last,
or memories of pain from past.
It's when you can love again,
but you just chose not to.
When you think attraction slowly fades,
worst heartbreak is feelings left unsaid.

I may burn out like a candle and
I may pass away
I may fall just like a shooting star
my heart will stay
I'll be yours until forever,
forever I'll be true to the promise
I have made from the day that
I found you
forever your in my heart
even if were apart

I say, forever I'll be yours
forever I love you
I say, forever I'll be yours
forever I love you
my love will never fade away
even if I'll die and
I will love you until the end of time
even without your smile
So help me please I beg you,
To stay.

a sip of yesterday morning's coffee reminds me of you
cold and bitter and "what else would you expect"; you'd say
i keep drinking, knowing i could and should drink something better
but i don't, i can't, and i won't
this is life how i choose to make it;
an endless cycle of coffee I'll never drink when I'm supposed to, but will always finish

I was going to write until it felt like the truth.

skim page, skim milk, skip
rocks and roll
into the water.

It's not sinking. It's a race.

This dance, this ricochet
roundabout remember.

Oh yes, the blinds flutter
like the wings of
a perched bird,

unable to decide where
it's off to.

Open them and we're in
the trees again,
closed November,

awake and asleep, too
black and white, too
beginning and end,

take a bite, right?

Nothing's cut and dry.
Dreams are proof of that.

Imagination doesn't follow
your rules.

The great empty plane
of this world. I'm
kicking up dust

just because I can, screaming
at the blank black sky
to show me a star

through all this smog,

meet the edge of the
world like I
always promised.

You look at me
like you’ve seen God.

Your eyes are the greatest
depths of the ocean while
I’m afraid to wade up
to my waist on the shores.

It’s as if every care you
have in the world has been
replaced by your sudden
desire to touch my lips.

I know your heart is a storm,
but it thunders to know the sun again.

you know the look
the look
when you feel eyes on the side of your face
but you're not completely sure
so you turn
instantly catching them
looking
their addictive
ice blue eyes
staring
and then quickly they're gone
looking somewhere else
like the floor or  
out the window or
pretending to be deep in thought
but
you know that they've been looking
because you've caught them twice before

Fear is the friend to all men
with one like that there is no need
for enemies that propagate
from the trigger releasing fear

prompting action from the crowd
splitting off with their own signs
“down with that”, “beware of this”
cleaving life down battle lines

into to this I find my place
with concerns near to my heart
describing dangers that I see
when the hurt extends its claws

the minor slights are much more
when they punch to my core
conversations meant to josh
expose the knives that will cut

back to this friend I introduced
the one that prompts reaction’s ire
statements mean to draw the lines
instead they wreck the innocent

this is the trap that I dodge
to protect those of same cloth
while remembering that all fear
sad reactions to this friend

© 2017. Sean Green. All Rights Reserved. 20170723.

Strings sharpen the plane of my words
Psalms heaves as the knife cut my words
These blades shall never hurt me anymore
These blades are the weapon of the unsuffered

Once I locked the heart within a flame
Turns and meanders of the fearless and lame
These blades shall never hurt me anymore
These blades are the weapon of the unsuffered

Angels whispers of the undue fortunes
As tears billow in the depths of the tunes
These blades shall never hurt me anymore
These blades are the weapon of the unsuffered

The rhythm cuts me in halves under troughs
Diced under the authority of dragons
These blades shall never hurt me anymore
These blades are the weapon of the unsuffered

Here I am once again, overturned all latches
Words once again over unfaded skins
These blades shall never hurt me anymore
These blades are the weapon of the unsuffered

To her friends, she is the angel created to save
To her lovers, she is the demon built to kill
But only a piercing true man enough to be brave
Can see she is an angel made by the devil

Thirteen roses in a row
Red rain falls,
Don't you know
Down the window
Pain it goes
In the gutters
Through the nose
Where's the thunder
When it flows...?

(Chorus)
Wrapped around
The gauze that's stained
What difference snow?
The same as pain
When it melts
It's just rain.

Withered flowers.
Falling leaves.
It's a howling in the eaves
It's the cult the
Maimed believe
No one cares.
No one grieves.
Cover up.
Long jeans & sleeves.

Razors are a water slide
On track like
A carny ride
Over arms & over thighs
Release all
The pain inside

(Chorus)

It's an ocean
Where we sail
A coin that can be
Heads or tails
A lover's letter,
Or junk mail
A piece of garbage.
Holy grail.

(Chorus)


SøułSurvivør
(C) 7/23/2017

The black shawl like quality
Of the nothingness
Wraps itself around everything.
A constant emptiness
That makes all full.
Its veins run blue
And gold and scarlet
And every hue between,
It dies as it arises.

The nothingness embraces all,
Easily, it encases me.
In everything and anything.
And that which I lack
I supplement with hope.
A chain mail lie linked
With fragile expectations
Of love and other drugs,
Other falsifications.


This tapestry holds whispers,
Secrets and blueprints
To all of creation.
Globes of dying light
That crash in the dark.
But alas I can see
It's stars are not cross'd
For me [cue tears],
I fear my script is lost.

Perhaps when the dopamine
Corrodes and rots my brain,
My soul will take the reins.
Connected to the cosmos
It tells me everything,
But yea, it shows me nothing
Except tantalising flashes
Of what could be,
In its swirls of red and azure.

everyone gone before you realise
how much more important they are
then that gram of k
and now its empty
scraped plate

you were always too late

I’m my brain i create this piece of filth that i call fate





living my life as if your eyes and mine
ill watch myself touch
myself
cus i know you can see me
doing it
for you

I am grateful you existed
For a short time in my life.
Teaching me guys can be selfless
Showing me boys can be kind.

I am thankful for the new experiences
That I got to share with you.
You taught me many a lesson
And made many a dream come true.
Like pottery and Paris
Pic n mix and Polaroids.
Also birthdays and BBQs
Brunch and bike rides.

I am appreciative of your patience
Even when I was too hard to love.
I will remember you as a beautiful coincidence
That now I can let go of.

Sitting on my balcony
As the dark envelops the lake
Drinking a glass of wine
I forgive everyone their sins.

I love to laugh, I kid you not
In fact I chuckle quite a lot
You may find if you see me smile
And clouds have lifted for a while
That I love to laugh

Life see-saws a bit you see
For those with temperaments like me
So when I'm down life is a bore
Yet where there's mirth my spirits soar
For I love to laugh

When black dog comes with all his ills
And I'm told to take those bloody pills
To help me sleep and ease the pain
I'm quite soon bouncing back again
And I love to laugh

One thing's for sure life is a riddle
Can't swim sedately down the middle
When it's a bumpy ride on a choppy sea
For mood-swing people made like me
But I love to laugh

lazy summer afternoons spent escaping the Georgia heat
pollution from the city intertwines itself with our damaged skin
i sit on his front porch as he and I torture our lungs
i never experienced him outside the four walls surrounding his bedroom
it was those walls he felt more secure;
a recluse out of insecurity, not desire
the sun and moon,
i rise in the morning just as he begins to set
only to be awoken by a sudden terror that if tomorrow is never guaranteed,
why should i waste a third of my life sleeping
when I'd rather be in the arms of a man who never shows his face?
i recall i fell in love with him many times,
once when i saw him hiding in the back row of the theater,
another when i heard his rasp in a voicemail,
after we made love in a room with no AC,
and once more when i followed you into a dimly lit room
i fell in love as you slipped your hand into mine
and the velvet underground played somberly,
and drowned out the white noise that came out of my mouth
as i whispered in your ear;
"If I Could Make The World As Pure"
please, make this easy on me
"And Strange As What I See"
i often have to wipe away tears as you turn your back
"I'd Put You In A Mirror"
and put on your clothes
"I Put In Front Of Me"
i'll mumble an I love you
"Linger On, Pale Blue Eyes"
and hope you mean it as you repeat it back
"Linger On, Pale Blue Eyes"
there is too much to lose, i am scaring both of us

I want to be alone,
And someone to be alone with,

Crowding eachother
In an Empty heart,

Dark stars entwined
In a melodious nothing,

Taking in the sorrow,
Lovers with melancholic grace.

i don't know why
but here we are
you pulled me from the dark void
i thought was life
and showed me true possibilities

May you have blessings come as you walk in footsteps of your divine self.

May you have abundance as you dance in the moment that is a blessings.

And May you awaken to feel the power by being connected to all that is

I wish to age like a wrap-around porch
In a thunder storm,
While generations tell tales,
Sipping drinks.
A porch of blinking stars,
A place to run out of rain,
With wooden steps for deliveries,
With ascending and descending friends.

I will age like a tree,
Grow stronger in the wind;
Give shade and shelter to all
Beneath my ring-aged limbs.

I wish to age as a river bends,
Contiguous with all shores;
Floating everyone I know
On eternal waters defying death,
A current winding with no rest.

I will age like a star,
Burning bright, giving light,
Something to reach for.

I wish to age like a mountain,
With secret caves and riches.
And you can rock your soul
Around, over or through,
Solid, snow-capped summit,
Beckoning you.

I will age as the moon,
In stages, full and new;
Each night different,
Unnoticeable fading,
As all who age will do.

He almost liked her
She almost waited
With all that they were  
They almost made it
And bright would have been the burning of there star had it not faded

and no matter how much i tell myself that i will never be anything to you but a hole to fuck, as i twist my head back to look at you, your eyes closed with bliss, the space between your eyes wrinkled, and your lips stuttering with harsh grunts with every thrust of your body in me,
a whine escapes my mouth,
and almost carelessly, as if it cost you nothing at all,
you reach down down down;
mercy comes in the form of your tongue on my lips, and like a parched traveler, i drink from your mouth
as if it were an oasis in this damned wasteland

oj nie, nie w mej "parafii!" po prostej: spierdalaj z tym dziwatswem, jak naj dalej ty potrafisz! kiedy by to znało swego ojca, by tak samo zamordowało swego nosiciela, kiedyś zwaną matkę: nie kuś... nie kuś... to nie prosze: to groźba!

to trza ducha trzymać -
i swą odpowiedz dać;
gdyby to nawet w mgle,
w ogniu,
  w czerni lochu
                dna bałtyku!
    czy też
           w węndrówkach
                       cienia: wiatru!
o czym, boga memu,
ja z tobą mam o czym do
gadania?!
czy ty wreszczie zrozumisz
ten żal, mego serca,
kiedy powiem ci:
          kiedyś raz,
teraz "czasem",
      a wkrótce nigdy!
ponad ten jeden bolesny
lecz piekielnie warty raz...
nigdy! wiecej!
wraz z swą morde:
  zór kluskiem i kołyską,
a kwit zęba na poczęcie
gryzu...
            aby to dziecie:
nigdy nie widzialo zwyżu:
ani ksziężyca, ani słońca!

I envy for that, forever sleep
That comes up naturally
From which I wish, I do not wake
In which I lose myself totally
So deeply drowned
Even a thought can not reach
My brain a frozen vacuum
Nothing to it, you can teach
But these eyes do not sleep
The doors to my brain,
Are always active and awake
Only to watch these eyes rain
The aches and pain soothes
My delicate, withered body
A touch brings me shivers
But with me, there is nobody
I crave for that everlasting love
That oneday I'd be an apple
In the eyes of somebody
But it seems it's too late
To takecare of my own body
Weak and paralyzed
Covered in shroud like sheets
I hear the whispers of death
Far beyond,
...............counting on my beats!


©sim

"No" he said, "not again, we can't"
grabbing her shoulders, one last kiss did plant.
Handed back her hotel key,
tried to do the right thing but weak was he.
"They won't find out" she said with a smile,
clutching his crotch, "I'll make it worth while".
"I'll do things to you your wife never will,
take my whole body, every orifice you can fill".
Her husband was out of town again
knew he'd be back, just didn't know when
Been like this for months; the risk was so high
but after being with her, he felt he could fly
So he agreed, again, to meet her there
walked in the door- she was in a chair
waiting and naked except for fishnet stockings-
put the sign on the door so there'd be no knockings
Took her there, her ass in the air
For one glorious hour, hadn't a care
She urged him on, talking dirty like a slut-
this was so different from his marital rut
Never even took his clothes off this turn;
just unzipped and hammered her without concern
Ravished her body, leaving her soiled and wet;
the most satisfying tryst he'd had with her yet
As he stepped away, straightening his tie,
he came back to reality- his life was a lie.
How could he do this? He tried to refuse-
was ruining himself; so much to lose.
She cleaned herself up, kissed him on the cheek-
Said "you're the best, my husband goes away again next week".
"I'll see you then" and she ushered him out-
poor lost fool knew he would, without a doubt.

William Lacey Turnbull 7-24-17

The warmth of a bonfire is what I seek,
amidst the chilly alpine milieu, under the sky,
a sky that is clear and dark at the same time.

I wish for the densest darkness
as I yearn to witness the brightest glimmer,
the lucid shimmer of the twinkling starlight,
unmarred by a circuit of city-light.

Misty monsoon in a cup of coffee,
in search of milk-warm sunray
with reasons rolled in a scroll,
entwining fantasy on the window pane,
craves for a life as easy as it was
in the book of the binomial theorem.