Loneliness lingers
Where your touch once
Scorched.

It's bleak outside
Drawing me inside
While I wait
For a clearing

she woke up screaming
windows and china tea cups shattered
she blinked
another nightmare, she recalls

when was the last time she dreamed?

i told you about it all
i told you all my secrets and the stories
the betrayals and the pain
i told you my biggest fears and my happiest highs
i told you it all.

you know more about me than i do myself.

please dont become a stranger with my deepest secrets.

cotton blue skies
cigarette smoke clouds
parted lips;
but they spill blood
severed fingers that i'll swallow
indirectly
nervous eye contact
because my brain is a little skewed
you say you don't mind
but i know you do
bathroom tiles are my best friends
real friends hurt like [that]
i want to dissolve like pills in water
to dive into ice blue oceans
and sink down to you
chain me to the bottom
of your ribs

Je pense, soulement.
Je me souviens les jours de toi.
Pour quoi?
Je ne sais pas.
Je t'adore. Je sais que tu sais ça mais je dis-le anyhow.

Dear me,
Don't just sit
Rise, and pursue greatness.

Don't just watch
Go after what you want.

Don't just exist
Strive and start living.

Don't just dream
Work hard and aim for success.

Don't get tired
Keep hiking until you get to the peak.

you were here
but not for long
i can still smell your scent
from the last hug you gave me
you made november feel
like an eternity full of love,
but for you
was just a blink enough
i remember
your smile,
your style,
your words
which didn't mean anything
nevertheless it was the first thing
i fell in love with
but i'm not mad anymore
i'm healing
at the end i wish you'd understand
everything i said
everything i did
it was never heard or seen
today, nor in november

Searched for the clock and it says 7:04

Reminiscing memories I always ponder

Of the guy who made me feel I am the strongest

Then left me shattered,

now I’m on my weakest.

the soft ''i love you''
we whispered as you left,
will forever be burned
into my memory

tomorrow, darling,
you say to me ,
as you walk out the door,
and I drift back into sea

mind in wonder contemplates 'the eye'
and 'eye' never tires of looking-
reading the mind of others-
while watching their manifold actions.

I am the deep, the sky in reverse
I have what you seek, for better or worse

I am the blue of infinite depth
I've swallowed the crews and cleared the decks

You are afraid or maybe intrigued
Of the place where you played and also was freed

Kiss me now like you did before
Give me your vow and the ocean is yours.

I'd like to cut my heart open
to take you out
or maybe
to see you one more time

Morning finds me
In your smile
Pulling you close
I want to start the day
With the whisper
Of your name
And welcome the night
In your eyes
Curling up next to you
Falling asleep
With your name
Lingering upon my lips

Everyone hates me.
I feel like I hate me sometimes.
I’m such a *****.
I’m not a nice person and people think I’m rude.
I’m just shy, and awkward.
And sometimes I’m not in the mood for people.
And I feel judged, and misconstrued.
I want to feel accepted, and appreciated.
I want to feel loved.
People hate me, and I hate me too.

They’d waited too long to say

“I love you”.

3 words. 3 syllables.

Yet they held millions of emotions unspoken.

and now that they’d done it, they wouldn’t,
couldn’t, stop

they told each other all the time. In the end of the argument and before the good news.

In the middle of the storm, even though it was hard to see, and after, when the raging winds had settled on a breeze

before the rising sun turned the sky pretty colors and after it flickered out and faded away into the dark

Underneath the stars that their love had been etched into

There was no love until death for them. Because it would never stop. Their love was beyond. It rose above any border that would dare to try and stop it. There was no finish line

because they were each other’s end game.  
-L.R

Why is poetry dying
when we still have the gift?
If we still have water
then we still have a ship.
We can sail to the places
these words take us.
We are still shaken
by the words that make us.
Why should we let poetry die
when there is so much to explore?
If only people read it
and discovered more.

To this day,
your name
still hurts my tongue
but I still say it anyway.
Sometimes I like to
hear my soul
gently tear itself
apart.

I see the snow
covering all
like carpet woven
with a softly yarn
to keep all the memories warm

the sly silence
coats over the sorrow
yet your absence
still bites my soul

Eating my beyond burger with a fork and knife,
drag race in the background,
my Samantha doll by my side.
This isn't loneliness anymore.
This is just life now.

I'm not very good with words anymore,
maybe I never was.
So little has changed and yet everything has.
I still long for love.
I still want to be wanted.
That might never change.

Yet now this lonely world is one I've come to accept,
come to love.
I may be my only friend here,
but that's one more than last year.

Nothing I create is good,
but I'm learning to create anyway.
I'm learning to share my bad art,
at least it's art.
Right?

I dream of slitting the throat of the dog next door.
Someone outta shut him up.
I used to think that was an evil thought,
now I know there's no such thing.

I turn 21 in 2 days.
Math. Yuck.
I'm old,
getting older every second.
Whatever.
I will grow into this skin,
I'm sure of it.
Maybe.

I'm grateful.
More than anything I am grateful for it all.
The pain,
the pleasure,
the guilt,
the anger.

Pills,
family,
friends,
dolls.

No one reads these except me.
So this one is for her.
For you.
Anne,
my love,
my villain,
my biggest fear.

May this year be kind to you,
may you be kind to it.
May you listen to your spirit guides,
may you accept what you never could.

Growth is sticky and wet,
Knowledge is thick and grey.
May you be the light and the darkness,
the cut and the band aid.

More than anything,
be okay.
You're gross,
in a sort of beautiful way.
May you be okay with that.
Truly.




Bad art is still art.
Right?
I think so.
For now.

In the cold, dark
        of January,
         I remembered
              you
        the most.
  As the chill
      snapped bones
              like branches,
     as the afternoons
   bathed themselves
in gray,
     as the birds
and the backs
      shook,
so did my lips
   around your name.
I'm so happy
     January is almost
over now.

your name is
forbidden in
my mouth
or in my heart
because when
i think about
you;

i'll cry a little more,
hurt a little stronger
love a little softer
because you no longer
make me feel sober

i'm drunk on the
memory of you