Everyone wants to
                      be the sun,
         to brighten up someones
                 life, but why not
           be the moon to shine
                   on someones
                   darkest hour?

                 And if you are
        to love, love like the moon
                 loves. It doesn't
            steal  the night.  It  only
                 unveils the beauty
                     of the days

                  Love me like
           the moon intended, all
              the  way  through
                   the darkness.

                 The sun loves
            the  moon  so  much,
                 he dies every
          night to let her breathe.

             Never save things
          for special occasions.
                Being alive is
        the only special occasion
                       there is.
                                                            
                                                                                            Jon York   2019

You bite the bullet and hold the gun
But you stand in front of the mirror all day
Acting stunned

Few people can be beleived
The lips are packed with lies
Words fall as if manœuvred
To benefit selfishness’s world.

I carry the dust of deceitful
tongues, swollen, diseased
Where is cleanliness left?
‘The dog’s bowl at the door’.

Love Mary ***

Help! Cried the money
I am looking for my worth
I feel so empty

Life was a breeze when we were both thinner
When we were young and dismissed the vanilla
You were a ***** and I was a sinner
When you had no fears and I was a winner

Bagging groceries has given me
A strange window into people's lives

I stuff their secrets into a paper sack
And I tell them to have a good day

But im not sure they do

When worries creep into my mind,
I am trying to explore them like territories
Plot them on a map and create logical lines.

I am trying to not let them come to life:
Giving them teeth, giving them intuition,
Endlessly gnawing at my insides.

You break your own heart
Everytime you don’t listen
to your gut and soul

Love grows cold
Like a forgotten cup of coffee
On the dining room table.
The steam dissipates;
Trailing into nothingness.
Leaving behind the bitter taste
Of lukewarm commitment.

Can you tell me the last time you cleaned your hands of me?
Did you scrub yourself raw like I did?
Did it bleed? Tell me, did it hurt?
How did you forget about it so fast?
Can you please tell me?

Every moment,
Ever fleeting.
One second, you’re riding a high
The other, you’re hitting a low

Anger, sadness, being 'upset'
These emotions flow
I feel almost sad about feeling so
Yet, here I am
Wondering, what could have been so?

I wonder why we feel these things
Why can't we just be happy for all
Happy for me, happy for you, happy for all
Then I realise,
Would happiness exist?
If I didn't know to be sad
If I didn't know to be angry
If I didn't know to be upset...

Life gives you highs and lows
You ride the highs,
Float through the lows
And hope,
And know,
To experience the highs,
Is to survive the lows.

i fell for you and you only watched.

he touched me
and my knees felt weak
my mind went blank
and I didn't know how to speak

After months of sleeping next to you, today I woke up, rolled over to see your face, and was __.

a) in love
b) complete
c) nervous
d) alone
e) all of the above

Another page fades
Another face aged
Over and under, again and beyond
In time we wither, till we are gone
And unto the meadows, dead with a song
It shall not be long, until we are done.

"They all love, as they dig my grave
They find love, as they dig my grave
We find love, as they dig my grave
As they dig my grave away"

In time, even ashes dissapear.

April 23 2019

it took me forever to realize
that the darkness
is fine

just not
all the time.

I want to smother you
with my pillow hands
suffocate your skin

I would scoop out your eyes
to see no evil
blind you from all sin

I'll wrap you in chains
secured to my heart
controlling your brain
so pain won't start

Twist your words
around my tongue
scratch them back
in your back
verbatim

I could cut you up
so you fit in my pocket
bleed your soul
into a precious locket

Smash your skull
to ease your mind
claw my way in
to your insides

What music do you like?
Artist?
Song?

someday it will
come again.
someday someone
will come in.

a star
with the deepest depths in the eyes
with the gentlest of breaths
and endless soul in the smile

one day
i'll forgive this pain
not forget -
forgive.

Somewhere
Somewhere between joy and frustration
Between reality and imagination
Between love and hate, day and night, black and white
That’s where we are
So close but so far

$12.83
And some change
That I’ve been waiting for
Shove it deep into my pocket
Next to letters scribbled
Un-alphabetically
On the back of a receipt
Letters destined for a screen
Hypocrisy
Two tacos and a tea
Cat food and Zoloft
All my favorite things
$11.29
Am I happy yet?
Am I happy yet?
Am I happy yet?

I used to think you were there for me
That you’d stick with me
I wasn’t always super loyal
But neither were you
Now you just leave me
For them
Here I am
All alone
Even though there are a lot of people
Thinking.
I tought I could trust you
But I guess
I was just a stand-in

I wish I were made of stone
So your words would never hurt me
I wish I were cold as ice
Then maybe I wouldn't be lonely

I wish I were made of steel
So my strength would never waver
If only I could turn back the clock
To a time when I felt safer

But I'm only flesh and bone
And your words have left me bleeding
My heart is torn apart
It's a wonder it's still beating

You made up your mind
Given me your final answer
What we shared is in the past
Time to write a brand new chapter

I will fix my broken heart
Some how glue it back together
It may never be the same
It'll bare this scar forever

But I'll be strong, I'll be alright
Though I'm not as hard as steel
And I can't turn back the clock
In time....my heart will heal

The Best Part about it ...
No one ....
Wins.

i owe myself
an apology
for who i used to be
and a promise
for what i will become

I love him
I tell myself
I know that
We will be together forever
I don’t believe that
We could be separated
My thoughts tell me that
He’s the love of my life
Sometimes my heart lies and says
I could live an eternity
Without him
Like my friends say
“We’re perfect for each other”
And you can’t tell me
He’s not the one.

Now read from bottom to top.

In the cradle of my mind
You lay in wait for me supine
To hold my hand amòngst the sand
To join in stoning loves caravan.  
We will rob earth of her mystery .
Dancing in the silver spray of serendipity .
Basking in the wealth of living simply.

"I am aware of that madness and craze, or so people hast said, Of the mad king, with the eyes of the sky but the head darker then sun could ever reach. Little do they all know, that all men are mad and crazed. The king merely decided to face that of his own."

I’ve idolized so many people throughout my life.
Always thinking they’re fantastic, great people.
But then I always realized,
They were just an illusion.
Because they’re are no “fantastic” people in this world.
The world isn’t black in white.
There’s good and bad
Light and dark,
In everything.

~for those who will read this and weep~

the quiet ones,
the silent Job ones,
who quote not from the
Book of Lamentations,
but author their own,
based on-the-Job experience

localized versions of cryptic elegiacs
accepting the wooden crosses borne,
stepping up to the
unrequested unforeseen,
then buried under, burnt alive,
yet never relieved by dying,
nailed by words, stronger than iron,
promises sworn, promises kept
with no ending date relief,
promises by and to themselves,
but not for themselves!

the wearers of crystal glass shackles,
adorned with decorative locks for which
no key did the maker make,
nor any divine creator
dare conceive an early release,
never no escape contemplated,
for the lock human, unrepentant unbreakable,
a decorative useless metaphor gesture,
a blunt “life *****” advertisement

I compose amidst a
bus pond of mismatched city folk,
a tapestry of ages colors and differing views on god/no god,
none would believe that as the bus sways me,
it’s in rhythm to holy choral music,
hundreds year old,
divinity masses and motets worships,
where one human can hide temporarily
a safe house,
to calm his questioning relentless
from the horrors of no answers,
for when the mind has no solution
to the rough and tumbling lives,
lived in glass shackled confinement,
the poets desperation equals theirs

summon eagles to transport these imprisoned,
but the shackled refuse,
I come to them but they wave me off,
I go crazy for once I was enslaved,
thirty years war that left devastation,
from which so many poems created

so I speak with heightened regard
of one who planned futures for others where his
non-existence was a founding father (ha!)

but the day came and
I was released by my own inactions,
but means nothing until a way to
away found
to release the yet bound early

got a couch, airline miles, hundred dollars
in my pocket and an unrelenting need
to save them, a consumption disease,
the glass shackled, at ease,
won’t rest till all are freed
this my creed
no one left behind

these cyber words do not mock
for they are unbounded, set free,
when
the flesh connects and the needs of the flesh
are stronger for they are in heart conceived