sometimes I just wanna get up & leave
everything behind me
just to forget
who I used to be,
get out there
there's a whole world to see

There aren't enough words in the world
Nor enough time
To tell you all my regrets as I tell you goodbye
...
There aren't enough emotions in the world
Nor enough tears
To tell you all my heart feels as I smile and walk away
...
Because how can you leave someone
Who was the only place that felt like home?
...
Yet that's exactly what I did
...
Because houses always stand longer
When there's no poison to ruin it
...

There's no place like home... until you realize you're doing nothing but repainting over scars that'll never go away and chasing after dreams that were nothing but mistakes. You were my only home but you were also my greatest mistake... I only left to make sure you got the happiness you deserved

(This was written about 6 years ago and yet the original, longer version of this work brought me to actual tears. Enjoy this snippet and happy writing! ~BM)

Pain to loose,
Strength to gain.
Who knows who will leave me,
So I pushed them all away.

This is for those times when we r betrayed . And we don't trust anyone anymore not even to ourselves. So we pushed everybody away. It's okay take ur time.. to reconnect
Morning 4d

I am like a roller coaster
A twisted creaky track
Taking you on my ups and downs
Never holding back
Looping through the disarray
Of an introverted maniac

You hit that final drop
Around the last bend
Then to a full force stop
Some will have fun with me
Others maybe not
But in the end,
They all well get off
And leave me without a thought

I am like a roller coaster
A twisted creaky track
Behold the out of service sign
Sorry, no more riders.
I'm now completely wracked

I detest when people ask: are you OK?
It gets even worse when it proceeds to: what's going on?
I avoid the answer to these questions, for their answer is neither clear nor joyful.
I wish they would never ask
I wish they would just stay quiet

They think they know what I have
They think they know what I need


I don't need their attention
I don't want their attention



I Just want to be in an empty room...




Where the only sound is the echo of my thoughts...





And I don't have to talk...  






Or think...                                                  







Or move...                                                          ­              











But they come back....      







They pressure...




They stare....



They judge.....


I want them to leave.


I don't want them to wonder about me.












Leave                                            ­          













Leave me alone.                                            














­



Stop torturing me.                                        





















­







Only then can I torture myself                            
.

A battlefield covered in sacrifice.
Pride was slain, but we lost a life.
Blind love with the eye sight.
Two sides but who's right
Both wrong so we do fight
Harsh words and they do bite
Just do right and do life.
He's black with white wife.
Bow down to a new night.

It’s been three years
I actually fit in here
And yet you want to leave?
Why are my decisions
Never left up to me?
It dosnt matter anyway
No one will ever stay
It’s gotten to now
Where I’m accustomed
To you as you walk away
I guess that now
I know how you look
More from behind
Than in the front
I wish I could rewind
I don’t know what would be different
Or how it would end
But maybe I would be firm
And not bend
When I was made to leave
And told to walk away
Or maybe even you might stay.

Just my thoughts one life atm hopefully will be better eventually.......

I've realized that i, too, am deserving of love.
And, no matter how bad i want yours, i have learnt that it comes with... pain.
I do not deserve that. No one does.
So, excuse me, but i must go.

Alec Jan 11

I cant stay by you
I’m an extrovert but this, i cant do.
My personality should allow me to
But yet still I’m off a bit, I’m something new.

The longer i stay here
The more i can feel the tears
Are they going to stream down my face?
But when it comes to holding back, I’m an ace.

When it comes to hiding things
I can jump through all the hoops, and all the rings.
I can easily put up a face if i want
And you won’t be able to find anything no matter how much you hunt.

My goal is to leave
I know it makes everyone seethe.
‘Course that only helps me
You’re encouraging my behavior without being able to see.

But you deserve it
Because you make my head ring
In my head it sits.
Waiting for the bell to go “ding ding ding”

I cant keep fighting these demons
It’s not worth it for some fun.
I half want to stay and i half don’t
Because no matter how much i love you,
These demons are making me choke.

kvgy Jan 10

i don't know
what hurts me more
your filthy words
of the mourn galore
or your hearts that grow
apart as the wind blow

i thought I've loved you dearly
too keep you happy
i thought summer's sunshine
won't fade away

but darling I've been so wrong
about you all along
now i am long gone
i am long gone

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