All I feel is sadness, anger and pain.
It's really beginning to drive me insane.
Sometimes I start to cry,
and no, I don't know why.
People want to understand
and take me by their hand.
They say it's going to be okay.
Turns out that's all they can say.
my mind is trying to find a reason
why this may be happening
but it keeps searching
and it keeps coming up empty
there is no explanation
or logical reason
there is no solution
to this problem
you said so many beautiful words
and they’re saying
none of them meant anything to you
but how could i believe them
when i know your eternal soul?
why would you say those things
and not mean them?
if you read this and you know it's about you, please just text me already
How do I explain to you the feeling of
inadequacy when someone loves or compliments?
How do I explain to you the fear of being a disappointment
or not having climbed up to someone's level of expectation?
How do I explain when without warning I am plagued
with self doubt, layered with chaotic-heavy-blues
and harboring insecurities?
How do I explain when I don't want
these thoughts to matter?
when I just want them to be deprived
of care that they die within,
and never surface to my skin.
But somehow like the crashing waves
they envelope me in the depths and like
the black hole **** me from within.
How do you explain
Is there an explanation
Explain it to me...
Brian Hill - 2019 # 166
Sometimes you just want someone to explain it...
~am I just a dumb make-out girl?~
Am I the one who hears about your feelings or am I the one who you pull against the closet to kiss?
Am I the one who knows when somethings wrong and gets a explanation or am I the one who is dancing with you on romantic music and gives you hugs?
Can I be both?
Will you let me both
i think about if he thinks about us
Do you understand the immense love I have for you?
I must fight my feelings each day
Oh how I'd share your suffering if I could
Take it from you if there was a way
I just do not know if you get it
Wish I could explain better
Finding it hard to capture the expanse of my emotions
With punctuation marks and letters
I cannot love you a little
Don't hold the ability to shrink my heart
More desire fills beds each passing night
Increasing with the number of miles apart
It hurts when you have someone in your heart but cant have them in your arms
Explain or leave
Explain my pain
You won't come back any way
I wish I could find
The correct words and sequence
Of them to explain
Before you can explain it,
Don’t try to explain it,
Just watch the weather change.