Sleep.
Sleep child,
til' the light overpowers the darkness inside,
where I secretly cried.
I secretly tried,
but no one would guess,
and I never put my cards face up.
It's only ketchup.
Used to patch up,
the cut and scratch ups,
caused by the dull
of my pencil,
and my soul.
I fell,
but I dragged myself up again,
back into my daily skin,
and I'm that burden.
That one whose not fully there,
told by everyone, "you just don't care",
with a random shudder scare.
The words I despise you all think,
even the shrink,
and it drowns me to the sink.
I'm that disaster,
everyone's after,
maniacal laughter.
"Am I losing my mind?"
"Is this mind really mine?"
"Would dying be fine?"
I'm not so refined :)
I can see the things in perfect imagery,
things I don't want to see,
always worried everyone hates me.
I can't see,
I'm not me,
I'm not even a somebody.
Maybe inside is some other ghost,
I'm the host,
at my death let's just have a toast.
Til' death do we part,
take it as a new start,
buy the roses to my grave from walmart.
I didn't think I mattered anyways,
sleeping through these pass-me-by days,
my mind playing simon says.
I always secretly try,
but I am still I,
and now simon says ".....goodbye."

He bit the curb.
Does that make you disturbed?
She laughed at tears.
Does that deepen your fears?
They don't know when to stop.
There's no stop signs in this town.
If it's you, life's sad.
But if it's them they shouldn't make a sound.
Some don't fit in,
and they just can't help it,
no matter where they been.
I guess no one really developed it.

Whom I kiddin?
Some people are fake,
on the outside their only,
the character they make.

"Who wants to run like me?
Who wants to get away?
I look around,
but they all seem A-okay."
Well if he judged you,
He'd seem to be just fine.
But you'd never guess,
He's scared of being left behind.
If she beat you and spit in your face,
you'd figure she was spoiled,
but her life was just so misplaced.

Why do they have to smile?
Why do they have to drown?
Why do they have to go away,
after smashing into cold, hard ground?

I'd say you need a lesson,
but you've probably had one too.
Stop being arrogant,
if there's one thing that you do.

They've seen the grey clouds,
and you've seen the rain.
And surprisingly we've all gone insane.
So why drive us mad?
Why call us bad?
Make us sad?
What have I done?
Nothing,
but yet I'm being pushed.
Off my feet, off the swings, off the air, off the edge.
By you, by them, by me, by life?
I'm going to stand here,
and proclaim to the skies.
"For once, let this life be mine!"
"And please vanish the outer lies!"

Like a bird caged in the sky,
without wings to fly.

There's something beyond,
Something astray.
I wish to find it,
And if I long please
I may.

There's something that calls,
Singing my name.
I call back to it,
It longs me the same.

So the echo's resound,
Off the walls they lead the way.
I follow somethings voice,
And it soothes,"it'll be okay."

My heart moves faster than my feet,
Yearning me to speed up.
Simple words I needed,
Over-filled my cup.

There's something in the distance,
That nudges me to grin
My grin so wide it hurts,
And I can't stop doing it again and again.

Hush and listen closely for my eyes may just decieve. I devour every movement, and then my mind play a fool out of me. My nightmare fuel supplying my thoughts, well who thought up that one, because it can't be my fault. I tell myself a lie, but I know it's a lie, so I can only try. And try I fail, because I'm but a thought spark, climbing into a storm, drained away with other thoughts to a colorful farm. But the colors clash hard as lightning to skin. And who knew thoughts could feel fear. But I feel it from deep within. If I slip away I see darkness, if I stay in the light I feel wrong. Like is this true, or lies I hear, somehow it seems darkness is where I belong. And it hurts those dang thoughts, when they run about. One tries to get away and spills right out, so I get belt, but my father don't know. I can't help it, they don't listen, just flow. I recollect myself with water, down beneath I feel it strong. They do not believe in anger, somehow human responses are wrong. If someone did something that hurt you bad, you'd be a whimp if you sat all sad, that's not me, I didn't do that, I punched her guts up when she called me rat. I could quite hear the ding, her guts or mine. And my confidence flew, but crashed in an ocean. Because anger is wrong, my eyes do deceive, you say I say to stop rolling them, but it can't possibly be me. I'm just doing what I can, to make it through the day. And my thoughts may be but sparks, of tied down energy.

I'm an *** of a friend, and I sowwy.
Waking you up for my problems, I know.
Always bugging you about my insecurities.
I swear, wrecking you life's not my goal.
I get mad at you when I have dog days.
And I'm too shy, to pummel those who talk ****.
But I swear to you, this is not what I'm trying to do.
This is not what you deserve.
This is not what you should get.

You never whine to me.
I don't know how you keep things confined,
but ya know, maybe im wrong.
Maybe there is no sorrow inside.

What I'm trying to say is..
thank you for being there.
For holding me up ALLL the time.
Thank you and you're the best,
I would always offer up,
and break you out,
if you committed crime

It feels like i'm floating on thin air,
spinning,
drifting.
Wonder if i'm really here.
Shattered glass
makes stars that line the sky,
in every way,
and I don't even question why.
I'm a floater.
Floating on by.
I'm a drifter,
and I don't know why.
But I'm staring up
at this black glass sky,
that will welcome me at times.
Telling me it never really changes,
night is always night.
Cold yet warm,
and I don't know why.
Why I stare at this sky,
and call it a beauty.
Call it a saint.
Call it a home,
every now and then.
Why I float,
between it's stars,
that in my eyes,
don't seem that far.
Why I drift,
in it's cold warmth,
that hugs me,
embracing my inner all.
And I never ask why,
the cold warm sky,
is my stop sign,
while yet so vast.

Sleep wandress child,
in the light of the sun.
There will be more to see,
and you aren't yet done.

When the moon harshly closes you
still in it's dark,
And you feel yourself swallowed
whole,
by the shark.
You, can scream.
You, can screech.
You, can let out a hark.
Your voice moves the mountains,
and crashes the waves,
Your voice knocks over the aged trees,
Oh, how fierce it behave!
And would you lose your voice,
It would be okay.
Because soon enough,
there will come day.

You said,
You can't make it if you don't stand out.

I said,
I am.

You said,
You can't make it if you're black.

I said,
I am.

You said,
You can't make it if your homosexual

I said,
I am

You said,
You can't make it if you're too nice.

I said,
I am.

You said,
You can't make it if you're a women.

I said,
I am.

You said,
You can't make it if you're too tall.

I said,
I am.

You said,
You can't make it if you're too you.

I said,
I am.

You said,
You can't make it if you don't stand out.

I said,
I am.

You said,
You can't make it.

I said,
I am.

You said,
I don't understand.

I said,
You don't have to.

Stay nice.
A piece of advice. A note to myself when I've lost it all.
Stay nice. Even if you hate the world, or angst has driven a ***** through your heart- even if your soul is blacker than death- even if they stole from you what made you real- even if your hurting or a fire burns your smile up-
stay nice.
Does it help to hurt the pain? Does it help to run the good away? Does it help to drop the mic, because the song was too hard for comprehension?
What do you learn by throwing a fit or stealing a smile or telling a friend you quit?
Be the change you wish to see! If you want life to be a tree and each person to be a fruit then be the fertilizer, or rain, or sun. Help the fruits to ripen. Teach people that no one is just a number. No one is just another atom on earth. Be the Atticus Finch. Be the warming parental figure to the world. You cannot force a change in anyone and you cannot make rightful karma come, but you can smile through it and be the contagious laughter. No matter how frusterating it gets or trying it will seem, may you always remember who you want to be and who you are inside, (no matter what anyone else can say) may you always-
Stay nice.

Let them swim through your mind,
while you contemplate life.
If they ask what your thinking,
you won't really know.
It went from ground zero,
to somewhere past space.
And so, you have become quite distraught.
Now I know that it's tough,
keeping eyes on the prize,
and keeping your head in the game.

Small child,
Small world,
Small candle light.
Her face half lit but oh how bright.
All it came from a candle light.
Her birth a joy for all to see.
But, one day she'll forget me.
Big world,
Big dreams,
Big opportunities.
So far yet close, just over the seas.
While she fades too fast for the eye to see,
I just stare at old memories.
But across the ocean is where she'll be.
Average home,
Average life,
Average news to hear,
So black and white,
And so I fear,
The day she will leave is coming near.
It is sadly far too clear.
Present me,
Present her,
Present strawberry cake.
I had to learn to bake the cake.
It wasn't really too hard to make.
But if only for my sake,
I wish she'd wish away my ache.

If you were the saw to a magic box,
I'd be the one inside.
If you forgot the spell to make me whole,
I'd be fine just with you alone.
If you grew tired of my half-self,
i'd conceal it somehow,
long as you smile.
Because you,
you,
are the love of my life.

If you were gone,
I'd chase you.
If it seems too dramatic,
I beg of you,
notice the truth in these lines.
Look in the mirror,
and gaze as I do,
at the light you shine.
Because you,
you,
are a mystery,
even with all I know.

I was gone for a long time now,
stuck in a hole.
It was all pitch dark,
seeping unknown evil.
But I crawled back home,
under the flooding smoke.
I destroyed the creatures,
though my lightsaber broke.
Holding tight to it's handle.
In my hand,
the smell of iron,
may last forever.
And the pictures
that led crispy burnt bits to fall here,
were burned in the fire,
of my will,
strength;
desire.
I am not who I was,
but I am fresh.
like new car,
and my brain has been washed.
It's not bad.
It's better.
I'm glad,
and I will never
ever
fall
so deep
again.
I will never
ever
walk away
in the end.

This is not the person you once knew,
my face is dried and thin.
I haven't got the faintest clue,
how the picture remains,
nor who,
why,
or when.
I only recall some old 'honey' song
And how every line would begin,
"I love, love, love you."
As if to not speak of love was a sin.
I no longer know what to say or do,
struggling to remorse here once again.
It hasn't been very long,
but I feel I have forgotten the feel of your skin.

I'm the host of a ghost and the most that I know is I feel it burrowing deep in my soul. Like a monster it stares at me, yet cares for me too. Watching me patiently sink in the blue. Waves come down crashing like a party around, and even with you here sometimes there's no sound. It's shameful and lousy and frankly it's sick, that even with a love like this I get lost so quick. It's silly, offensive, and sometimes just cruel that I keep crying like we're in some duel. You'll forgive and forget but the feelings will linger, "is she manipulating me?" with my cunning bee stinger. And I'm shouting like the wicked witch "Oh, I'm melting, I'm melting" and I'm tearing like a crooked ***** while I'm belting and belting, "I'm melting, I'm melting," and swearing I'm caring but can I really care if everytime you need me I'm never really there? Frankly it's not fair! It's not fair that my tone falls flatter and low, and my body starts to move so heavy and slow, or my eyes shut tight and my head starts to hurt or my heart starts to panic and my **** eyes just burst. It's not fair that I can't listen without hearing my mind. Take one step forward, stepping five more behind. It's not fair that I don't think of you each second of the day because while I'm busy hating me, you're hoping I'm okay. You're doing everything you can like a single mom of five, and you don't even know you are the reason I'm alive. You make me smile in a way I've never seen myself before, and when you hold my body I just feel my whole world soar. I could spend forever with you, but I worry anyways- because I cannot promise you I won't ruin our nice days. I can't guarantee I won't just fall upon the tile in a bitter act of drama and just stay there for a while. I can't swear to you I'll rise and clean the whole house while you're gone rather than stay in bed asleep because my mind just is all wrong. You can't just trust that I won't lie or stretch the pain to keep the peace, and I would never ask you to just ignore that whole beast. If you love me, that's a joy I'll constantly question myself each day, because I'm still battling my health and I worry if you'll stay. And if you'll stay with me, you should know you make me whole. You watch the ghost beside me, while you protect my soul.

To be within but never without.
      Drifting by like drift wood shore to shore.
Knocking and ringing with scythe in hand,
      Cawing messengers, "Nevermore."
Shall specks of light shine in the night,
      be waved into the dark.
Beckoning for filling within,
         beckoning for angels to hark.
And hark they will for each hole they fill,
          but what man is an island, is still.
To be an art craved in the sky,
             no longer asking, but why can't I.

The wall said "not anymore"

Mother searched school to capture the bullies. But the rapture that sang never rang a word to her.
"Capture the bullies!"
No, not anymore.
The father called on his group, but their theories flying south. She needed diagnostics. Something was wrong.
"Something was wrong!"
No, not anymore.
Not anymore because something was gone.
Something was wrong, but could not be diagnosed.
It could not be diagnosed by popping a dose.
The dope on the street,
the sky wasn't blue,
it's just blank.
What was wrong?
Oh yes, something's wrong!
And so the rapture rang, and it cawed and it clawed!
And it scratched at the window with a piece of a shirt, and a scripture to say
"NO! She wasn't okay!"
Does it take you so long to decide what was wrong?
Well it's not your decision!
Yes, something was wrong!
We knew it all along.
Something was soulfully, graspingly wrong!
But before you point fingers,
before you slam doors.
Please listen to the rapture,
"no, not anymore!"

My friends call me nice,
You call me a ****.
My friends treat me well,
You treat me like dirt.
So tell me again why blood is thicker than water,
And how I must give you full respect because I'm ONLY your daughter.
Educate me on the ways of the ancient wise ancestors,
Who respected so highly each our freedom's brave molesters'.
Keep telling me how youth breaks governmental laws,
And how if you're older- then you're better than your teenage boss.
How the world CAN'T be mine until I'm 25 and I'll ONLY be as good as you were for as long as I'm alive.
Oh please, keep telling me how live is,
And the 'natural way'.
Keep subliminally crying out these words to me,
Trying cheat me of my say.
Because maybe you do have the elder wisdom lodged between your ears,
But BETTER, WISER, MODERN men, know wisdom isn't based by our developmental years.

The news grasped our school so finely and tore it's reputation to the floor. We did not see it coming but someone filmed a fight from the door. Maybe 20 varsities who seen giving a  punch, a few other schools also, but not a whole bunch. The video went viral then was found on our tv's. They interviewed someone kicked out of football about our schools newfound needs. He said we needed something because something was not there. He said we sit as the worst school, but who was he to share? It sat on our tv's. On the old graduates tv's. On everyone's tv's. Embarrassment ran across every students face. The varsity was sent to another school and left without a trace. For 3 months, in the intercom, the principal ranted her shame. As expected, without the best players, we lost every football game. We've revived our spirits since that fatal day, but our reputation may forever lie gray.

I cannot lie.
I cannot lie.
I met the eye of poogley-pie
In my dreams.
I thought I'd die.
Oh how could I-
Oh how could I-
Have met the eye of poogley-pie.
It stared at me,
It glared at me,
It looked me up and down.
I nervously thought it followed me when I went into town.
They say the eye of poogley-pie does not take prisoners yet-!
I haven't fainted,
nor hit my head,
so how much more living can I get?
I cannot lie.
I cannot lie.
The eye- I saw it blink.
It was a man with a soft nice hand,
he sent me flowers...I think.
This poogley-pie,
is a sweet, kind guy.
It's hard to believe those who meet him soon die.

They knew their falling would come. Said, "Stead fast may we fall. For our legs may lie short but out heart will show tall."

"Grow up tall,
little kid,"
said grandpa Joe.
And so I did.

The watermelon grow tall too.
The sunflowers look to the sky,
keeping their chins up,
raised real high.

So maybe it's silly,
watching grass grow,
but if you never try,
how could you ever know?

So maybe it's crazy,
chanting for the rain,
but if it never comes,
how could I grow the grain?

I'd prefer to stare at clouds,
than sleep forever like a rock,
skidding by life.
Why, that would just ****!

So, if you ask me to leave this here place,
you better shove it,
before you wake up
in an unknown space,
******* with lace,
with a disfigured face,
completely full of mace,
and a strange case
of something poisonous.

I hopped in daddy's car today
We drove to an old looking house
Daddy said make sure and be careful
I said okay, because it may have ghost.

He brought his special brush for bones
I walked with creaks and squeaks
This was an adventure for Susie-ann!
I'd been waiting for this for weeks.

I was a knight sent to **** a dragon.
I was a pirate in search for treasure chest
"I am a girl with big imagination,"
Says my daddy with his searching vest.

I walk up the entry way
The tree scratched the door
This would be my great adventure
My feet were far from sore.

I didn't give up just that easy
A adventurer never quits
My job was not over yet
I couldn't have any submits

I flicked my flashlight at the wall
The ghost could not be seen
I was getting bored now
Embarrassed by the scene.

I was a child looking for ghost
Ghost, this house did not hold
I don't know why I was looking for ghost
When I should really be looking for gold.

We play hide and seek but am I even lost.
You look at me with widow fears and I fear you latching on.
You staple yourself to my dreams, my hopes, and I just want to liven up. But a timely death has crossed your path and formed such a great divide. A divide that has wrapped my body and you hang me up because your too kind. Have I love both your lovable and constant professing regret, then I'd be here forever, but my arms are bled and engraved by ropes and chains pulled tight. I know how unfortunate a soul may be but today I say goodnight.

Why won't he write.
It's almost been I year.
I lay in my own teary bed.
I question why I'm here.
He rejected my frail heart.
It was my fault for asking.
but, why does he have to go and cut off all connections.
I left so many messages.
6 until the end of the year.
days and days go by.
Until I question if he even cares.
Does he care that I am living or dead?
Would he mind if I wasn't here.
I feel a shiver down my back from the fear that grew so near.
Why do I still remember his face?
Why can't I forget?
If I told myself he was the past,
why does my soul regret.
I start to panic.
What might have happened?
Did he lose all breath?
Did he decide we weren't still friends?
How could he sink to such low depth?
Was he playing a trick on me?
Playing hot potato with my heart?
Was he just amusing himself, while I start to break apart?
Could it be...?
Could it be...I was the joke right from the start?

Can the sun be any brighter?
I may be engulf into the sky's bright ray.
My heart is so full I cannot have any more,
and so I shall love no more than what I do.
This is the ocean I hid inside.
This is the rabbit hole,
that sparks my every curiosities.
Can I fly any further?
I may implode without warning
My goosebumps may come right out of me,
and my heart, climb out my mouth.
This is the river to the hidden third path diverged
This is the forest I always get lost in,
that secretly points me to the answers.
Can I love?

I belong inside a seed capsule
Planted in the ground
My body in the fetal
Besides the water, bugs, and soil- no sound.
I belong there,  where my arms will spread
As branches fled the ground.
The dirt will fly around
And a shadow, grace my plain
I belong in the ocean
Where the waves wash over me
Softly pushing a warm force on my back-
Like a pat.
To say "It's okay.  It's okay." until I believe.
I belong deep deep down in the black
The blackest blue there is.
In the fetal position.
Warm-
Hugged-
Tight.
I belong behind glass walls in a cube in a world only I recognize,
Where people walk outside and glance only slightly with their careless eyes.
Where I scream like mercy me!
Where I yell past the tearing of voice box and beyond my gasps until there is just a silent hiss from my mouth.
And no views my way,  because is all just a warped, fuzzy mumble.  A few ears might point my way,  but they pass by still today.
I belong there.
Throwing glass bottles at the glass wall-
Yet unable to shatter the walls I'm within,
No matter how much shattering I hear inside them.
I belong.
Yet I don't.
Screaming.
Yet unheard.
I just want to be a bird.
Free to see the world.
Free to fly.
Free to fall and not die,
As I spread my arms and catch the wind, then start my way again.
Free to run away.
Free to stray and be.. Okay.

I look at lights,
Laying beat and battered,
hoping,
thanking,
proud to cry,
I simply stare,
to greet my maker,
welcomed in by midnight sky.
I lived a great life,
I die a great death,
I saved my country,
I paved the world a new path.
No coins,
a shame,
but it's worth what I name.
Victory!
I bow,
vicotrious,
I bow to many,
I bow to all.
And now...
I fall.

The stars do not just whisper,
they cry and yell and beg.
"Someone,
someone,
we are ill,
from this horror show we cannot unsee."
The land was filled with gas,
the stars,
too high to cleanse.
The stars are begging,
"Someone,
someone,
put this horror to an end."

Though on the other side.
The one that plugs their ears,
clipped noses,
zipped mouths,
and the society alive,
we say nothing to the stars,
instead we simply watch them cry.

I know we let you drop the shine,
and dazzles of tears
to our revolt and vandalized land.
I'm sorry we cannot let go,
and give you all demand,
but society has this image,
and it may not go away.

I'm sorry crying, yelling stars,
but no.
Not today.

Can't you wait til morning,
to caw like old bird do?
Shrill- as nail to glass,
or look like you, just aren't you?
Can't you just stay quiet,
and blend-
nor fight the waves?
We are all just fishes,
but you're the one that strays.
And if you could you'd help us,
but- oh- how thin you grow,
can't you see, you hurt us?
How is it, you don't know,
that our pain flames the brightest,
and you'll NEVER be the meat.
Can't you just stop cawing,
and float, with the harsh night sea?
Can't you just stop crying-
for what will never be-...?

Different people sitting in the same seats.
Seats scattered all over the earth.
Earth covered in questions.
Questions filling up my cup.
Cup pouring over, emptying, and overflowing.
Over-flowing life,
made by the simple mind.
Mind is mine.
I made it all my own.
I watch people walk by,
never knowing where they go.
And that's okay.
That's just fine,
cause if I think for myself,
my mind is all mine.

You know it well,
all life with a price.
A tag to every word that escapes a lip.
That no life is eternal,
or at least far as we know.
You must do,
to have,
then soon we all go.
But rather than fretting,
rather than dark depths.
Take the price tag and pay it,
as it won't rip off.
Take the price tag and pay it,
though it may rip you off.
Take the price tag and pay it,
since there is never a choice.
Take this price tag and pay it,
and work for what you want,
or demolish the store you built,
leaving holes in all you've got,
watching the land beneath you tilt.

She's a little bit of a dreamer,
with holes in her mind.
Her parents push her on the bike,
then she believes she's left behind.
Her poems plead forgiveness,
and unveil her sorrows deep.
Though she tries to change her image,
it's one which she knows she must keep.
But keep on peddling Kelsie.
If you feel like they're gone
you mustn't be brought down and sad.
Keep on peddling Kelsie.
Don't let fake sympathy
make you feel bad.
Peddle like the wind,
blowing dust into the air.
If some people choke,
brush it off like you don't care.
Being someone else,
is not what I ask you to do.
Stop asking for permission,
to finally be you.

You'll think you have me in the palm of your hand and like snow I leave only water, but don't soak yourself over cold things and empty-looking glasses, because that is what will keep you going and make you strong. Don't ignore it's existence because it has no bright colors or fear when the warmth hits your hands that touched something so frozen, and so heartless that warmth burns, because eventually the burning will go away and the warmth will flow throughout. You aren't glass and going from cold to hot won't shatter you, just hold yourself together. In the end I know my words are shunned, and shammed, but I still say 'get well soon'.

Laying under this old forgotten sky.
So forgotten its blank.
No one looks up there anymore.
As if they didn't care for the beauty.
They say stop and smell the roses.
Taste with closed eyes, they say.
Feel the chill run upon your spine.
They say it all, and forget so much.
But how can you forget the sky.
It once wore a baby's blue.
And the cotton ***** were  afloat.
Now this white cap has become a normal thing.
And do they care?
Do they?
Not in the slightest.
Child, you ask me how I know?
Why don't you ask the big white dome

In honey eyes,
I always falter;
such grace just out of grasp.
His towering dreams,
my striving never really seems to clasp.
I plead it is my best,
though my words fall weak and shy,
I'm a lover not quite perfect-
shame,
I often wonder why.
Lost deep in the shadows
and his vision slips away,
A growing void,
a cold abyss,
where our emotions often fray.
I beg my lover hear my heart,
The beats are far too soft,
For stallion as it may feel,
The goal grows more aloft.
It's too gentle,
just a subtle cry
Underneath our starry sky.

In the moon's gentle glow,
We two, we strive, we glow.
Your dreams, they touch the sky,
Yet I'm stuck wondering why.
The shadows, they play their part,
In this dance, a work of art.
A growing void, a fraying thread,
Our love's tangled web, I dread.
I plead, my love, hear my plea,
In this dance of you and me,
A song unsung, soft and sweet,
Two hearts in the moonlight meet.
The rhythm's off, yet we still try,
Beneath the starry sky.
A subtle cry, too gentle to hear,
Yet love whispers, have no fear.
We stumble, tumble, try to hold,
A love story, both young and old,
In honey eyes, our spirits soar,
Underneath the moon, we explore,
With grace, we find our way,
In the night, we'll dance and sway,
Together in the shadows deep,
In your arms, I'll always keep.

I don't have a handle to spin you no song,
I sing you no sorries,
nor pull you along.
I throw you no fancy words,
nor give you my heart.
I sketch no love for you
because loving is no art.
I throw you no diamonds
love last a lone wolf
I care for no bits of you,
the whole is my desire.
If I must give more than simplicity,
this love is not true,
hence t'is not for me.